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 platitude545
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 26
Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?Page 2 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
I know enough about Christianity and especially Catholicism to know guilt is big in its world with all sorts of rules to be followed including the big one ..believe (more thought control) or burn in he'll for eternity. As for men...lol...you are close to fifty and yet know nothing of his nature. Pretty funny or sad, depending on how you look at it.
 rednwhiterider
Joined: 6/23/2018
Msg: 27
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/24/2019 8:39:34 PM
who is "his"?

your dog?



this is shirely's thread.
you have your own.
 platitude545
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 28
Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/24/2019 8:47:03 PM
^^^little red, one difference between your world and mine is guys in your circle likely routinely cheat on their wives. Guys in my circle never cheat on their wives. I"ve never known a normal guy though who will not notice a very attractive woman. Don't tell me you are gay too?

You are right..I apologize to shirley for allowing million to goad me into a fight..and you too with your dog comment. Bowing out shirley
 _Rise_Above_This_
Joined: 1/14/2018
Msg: 29
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 6:08:16 AM

Shirley when religion causes guilt instead of joy, thereby possibly contributing to your depression

I don't think guilt caused by reading passages in the bible would affect many people suffering from clinical depression. In this case depression doesn't need a cause to start the process, it just happens and usually lasts a person's lifetime. Essentially it's a person's mind telling them to be depressed constantly though there can be times when it recedes completely. Think of it as a cloud over her mind.

Her faith in God sustains her through her difficult times and gives her the strength to deal with her depression.
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 30
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 6:32:43 AM
Good morning!

#1 OP said
Let this one thread show love, compassion and respect for all.

Just a reminder that this thread was intended as a platform for respectful discussionk. I'm fumbling my way through to what I am hoping is a better life. I've tried to do it on my own but I need help and I believe that God may be the answer. In the few days that I have been focusing on this path, I cannot believe the lightness and renewed strength in the way I feel.

#5 John
said an atheist can live by high moral standards while a Christian still falls short in many ways,

Personally, I think this is true in so many ways. We are all sadly imperfect regardless how we label ourselves spiritually.

#6 SS
And "perfection" is a tall order to be sure...but it's difficult to watch/listen to someone religiously pontificating if you know that person also has issues living up to the "gold standard" that is presented by religions.

This brings to mind the Pharisees from the Bible who would stand on the street corner, preaching and expounding on their good works living any way they liked and planning the fall of Jesus. We all know people who profess to be Christians yet live in a way that makes us doubt the very principle of what they claim to believe. I can only live the way I think Christ wants me to live and not judge others and while there may very well be a "gold standard", like we follow everyone of the Ten Commandments every minute of every day, I don't think anyone in all of our human failings can live up to that and God knows it.

#7 Red said
most folks here are looking for something.
finding like minded folks is key.

maybe the kindness of Christmas is a good thing in folks lives. ?.
By "like minded folks", I think you mean those who are willing to consider a path to Christ? That is true, but I am still interested in the thoughts of others. Kindness is a concept for many people and certainly of Christianity when Jesus said in the book of Matthew 25, "Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me."

#7 Then Red said something truly cool.
I am hesitant to label because it eliminates and ostracizes.

Isn't that exactly why we have had so much world conflict and suffering?

#13 Forereel
Best of luck dropping alcohol, I did it four years ago as a new year’s resolution and don’t miss it at this point…

Congratulations to you and thank you for your support and good wishes! I'm Day 6 today and very committed. It is a very big step for me when it has been part of my life for so long.

#16-Spectrallight said
good luck. You're stronger than you think.

I know that I am a strong person. I have had so many obstacles in my way over the course of my life, but no more than many others but we all keep getting back up to fight. I watch your suggested videos on 'Overthinking' and 'How to overcome negative thinking' but although interesting, that is exactly what I am trying to get away from. I have been trying to do everything myself and failing and now I am trying to put my life in God's hands.

#21 Platitude said
Shirley, salvation comes from within. Have the strength to forgive yourself for whatever you believe needs forgiving. You are only human. No man alive can meet the standards set forth in the bible. Remember, religion attempts to control not only actions but thoughts. Your thoughts are free subject to your free will alone.

I am learning that in order to forgive myself I must first confess my sins to God and repent in order to be truly forgiven. God knows we are only human and does not expect perfection. He knows that we will fall again and again.

# 22 Red said
careful taking too much on at once.
sobriety, faith, getting in shape, mental health, and dating are a lot at one time.

This is very good advice and I really appreciate the concern but I believe that God will give me only what I can bear.

#24 Platitude said
My only point is that religious mandates cause guilt in believers and can cause depression I would guess, so somebody has to look inside themselves and decide they are not going to feel they sinned because their religion said they did. I mean the 10 commandments forbid a man from being attracted to his neighbors wife, I.e a thought crime, i.e. a crime for being a man.

We are all human designed to appreciate beauty and personally I don't believe that appreciation of the attractive appearance of another woman's husband would qualify as a sin. If so, Oopsie! Lol. I might feel envy but it doesn't mean that I want or covet him for myself.
In the book of Samual, there is a story of King David who summoned the beautiful wife of another man and made her pregnant. She had no choice in the matter. He was King. I think that could be a good example of 'covet'.

#25 MR
Your lack of knowledge and understanding of Christianity are self evident. The "I would guess" is a big give away.]/quote]
I don't pretend to know even a fraction of what I would like to learn and my faith was also severely shaken in the way I was taught about religion. More about fear than anything else. That is why I am struggling to understand now and welcome the thoughts of everyone when they are expressed in a respectful way.
The song you recommended was lovely. I would recommend it to anyone and even posted it on my Facebook. It is not really faith based as it encourages people to be strong, although it does touch on Salvation.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=65uKK7ilE2w&feature=youtu.be

#26 Platitude said
I know enough about Christianity and especially Catholicism to know guilt is big in its world with all sorts of rules to be followed including the big one ..believe (more thought control) or burn in he'll for eternity.

It's sad actually that so many children have and continue to be raised in guilt and fear. I sorry that was also your example. I'll bet we could trade stories, but most of them I would like to leave in the past and move forward with the positive.

#27 Red said [quote this is shirely's thread.
you have your own

Not my thread, Red but hopefully a platform for everyone for a respectful discussion of Christianity but thank you for your support and request for respect.

#28 Platitude said
You are right..I apologize to shirley for allowing million to goad me into a fight..and you too with your dog comment. Bowing out shirley.

Wow. Big person to admit to fault. Please don't leave the thread. I am sure that others enjoyed your insights as much as I did. Your sense of caring came clearly through.

#29 Rise said
I don't think guilt caused by reading passages in the bible would affect many people suffering from clinical depression. In this case depression doesn't need a cause to start the process, it just happens and usually lasts a person's lifetime. Essentially it's a person's mind telling them to be depressed constantly though there can be times when it recedes completely. Think of it as a cloud over her mind.

Her faith in God sustains her through her difficult times and gives her the strength to deal with her depression.

I feel no guilt when reading bible passages. I consider them amazing words of wisdom. True faith is my ultimate goal and I’m still trying. If a few others are converted along the way then so much the better!

I hope I've covered everything. I sure do hope that I'm not coming across as some kind of ‘know it all’ because I'm just beginning this journey too and your comments and observations are important.

Apologies for the long post but this 2/10 rules is a bit restricting.

God Bless everyone!
 platitude545
Joined: 10/2/2018
Msg: 31
Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 7:14:10 AM
Shirley, if you find salvation in God, then that is where you need to find it. If you have been depressed despite your faith in God, over many years, than perhaps it is time to look elsewhere. You know yourself best and you know whether your faith in christianity has been a blessing or not. Take your strength where you can find it.
 Spectrallight
Joined: 9/14/2018
Msg: 32
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 8:30:42 AM
It might sound cliche but without failure there is no success.

You will get there :)
 BaldwinMotionPhaseIII
Joined: 10/15/2018
Msg: 33
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 10:17:42 AM
yes, they can be combined, and expressing what you want, on your profile, helps. but, remember....

pof can be anything you want. and everything you don't want.

Christian sites charge for the same reasons bars charge a cover. it keeps the unserious and the bozos out, or in the case of the sites, the naked profiles trolling for porn or johns.

it is easy for some to get into the ditch with the trolls in order to fight them. that's why its been nice lately that more people express their opinion. we feel like we aren't the only ones who can see the gaslighting, whereas before we weren't sure. Redwhiteandblue was correct, however, in saying to hold off on dating. its not fair for someone to fall for the caterpillar and later offer them a butterfly. also, those who look to victimize, seek out the ones weak from lacking a foundatoin to stand on and are looking for someone to lead them "anyplace but here". when you are healthy, you will offer health, and then it will be easier to find a partner--you simply look for those who give you the same respect you give yourself daily. when they say they love you, just ask what it is they love, and it should match what you have already discovered you offer.

Religion is as a good a compass as any other, in finding your way. of course, all who seek, find different clues along the way, and that's another reason to not partner up. as you decide what to keep and what to toss, you don't want a partner who loves you for the things you now decide you need to toss.

and SS454, if you haven't noticed...i (over)answered your request in a different thread.
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 34
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/25/2019 10:51:28 AM

Shirley, if you find salvation in God, then that is where you need to find it. If you have been depressed despite your faith in God, over many years, than perhaps it is time to look elsewhere. You know yourself best and you know whether your faith in christianity has been a blessing or not. Take your strength where you can find it.

See....but that's the thing! I lost my faith for many years. Never gave it more than a passing thought, like the guilt you mentioned. I am looking for that faith. I am reading, learning and praying and seeing in my daughter and the other women in Teen Challenge an inspiration for joy, faith and new hope.


Religion is as a good a compass as any other, in finding your way. of course, all who seek, find different clues along the way, and that's another reason to not partner up. as you decide what to keep and what to toss, you don't want a partner who loves you for the things you now decide you need to toss.

See....but there again! I haven't changed. I am the same person and I have put it out there that I am trying to be a better me and would love a supportive partner. I'm not responsible for another's choices. I had arranged a phone call a few days ago with a man from POF. An illness in his family delayed that and an hour ago when he texted that he was home and would love to talk, I suggested to him that he read my revised profile first. I haven't heard back and if I don't, that's OK. Even before I revised my profile, I still stated that I was seeking a "man of faith".
Nothing has changed there. I'm just getting more serious about it.
I was almost trapped in that ditch with the trolls and realized that it was not worthy of God or the person I have always tried to be and I climbed out.

Update....The fellow from POF just texted to tell me he would love to talk and meet soon!
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 35
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/26/2019 9:45:43 PM
Day 7! I can't believe how much better I feel in the morning and I am still dedicated to reading the daily devotional and a few chapters of the bible first thing each day. I haven't felt such joy in years of course the old me is waiting for the fall....but remain positive! That is all anyone can do. Good night!
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 36
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/27/2019 9:19:48 AM
Hello fellow seekers!
I am receiving several posts in my private mailbox which I do not mind at all, but many of your questions and observations might be helpful to others who may read this thread which sadly is dying as I seem to be the only poster. I realize that it is difficult to share your inner selves on a forum such as this, but it is pretty much anonymous particularly if you don't show a photo. Personally, if someone recognizes mine, then hopefully they will be inspired to start their own journey.
Today's daily devotional....."I have come into the world as a light, so that no one who believes in me should stay in darkness." JOHN 12:46
Simple explanation is that this light helps us to see things in the world and in our hearts from God's perspective.
May God bless us all today and show us the light.
 BaldwinMotionPhaseIII
Joined: 10/15/2018
Msg: 37
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Posted: 2/27/2019 10:19:04 AM
"See....but there again! I haven't changed."

>>>growth requires some change. sometimes our lives get boring once we've discovered everything there is to know about us and our own interests.

"I am the same person and I have put it out there that I am trying to be a better me"

>>>so the change was when you strayed from your true self. discovery would be, learning what caused the change and how to avoid the temptation to take easier paths. so you are learning avoidance. or you want to go to the "moral gym", and exercise those "muscles" to strengthen your ability not to stray from your true self. however, another way is...build the self respect so that whenever you stray from your true self, its so easily recognized as self-disrespect that you cut it off immediately. and that will require an ability to step outside of your actions, ignore their rewards for a time in order to see what you are doing, and how it makes you look, and then quickly deciding the initial reward isn't worth how you feel looking in the mirror.

"and would love a supportive partner."

>>>its not only one partner, its a network of friends, family, and coworkers. you have to be surrounded by people you wish to be, in order to avoid being in that ditch again. just like addicts have to avoid those they used to do their drugs with, the people who make certain behaviors seem normal. drinking and drugging is as much about behavior and lifestyle, as it is about the consumption and the affects of chemicals on the brain--hence the comparison.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 38
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Posted: 2/27/2019 2:02:07 PM
Hey sis, Always remember Religion is not spirituality . And I always remember Christ Dying on our cross covers our sins all of them . And this is not "we are saved", But It is a current active process it's always happening: Jesus covers all sins previous past and current : In the Christian venue As a son of the father We must know In our heart That Repentance can only be convicted upon our soul from God ..Other human beings cannot convict us, And "I repent" means when we feel the conviction , it will be allowed via our spirit resting in the heart of God..Jesus is indeed our comforter Our counselor, advisor ,There are a multitude of verses we can pick and choose From , yet the whole concept, the conviction will be felt in your heart of what you need to do for you !Blessings on the journey you have chosen
don't worry many christians abound on pof as christianity symbolically is steeped in fish mysticism.. yet often they can be on a mission to challenge others christianity instead of embracing so just my personal experience minor caveat..or if you want to bait em- just put other in the religion portion. lol

!
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 39
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Posted: 2/27/2019 5:54:10 PM
OP.... In your OP you said you would like to talk to other posters who share your outlook on God. Your headline for this thread says Christianity and POF-Can they be combined?

Since you started this thread I figured I'd throw in this 2 cents worth and ask how you feel about folks who don't think there is a God? What about others who believe in a God and or religion but not the one you follow?

I ask because everyone here in this thread and on the forum here [for the most part] seem like nice folks wanting to share experiences and ideas. We all have life experiences and some more than others. I am just glad to be able to share others thoughts and experiences on this medium.

500 years ago what we are doing would be considered sorcery, sacriledge or some other such hoo hah. Many religious beliefs on the planet go back even farther.

Is this truth, hindsight, or learning as we go? I think a bit of all and more to come as the future unfolds.
 Million_Reasons
Joined: 10/23/2018
Msg: 40
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:10:57 PM
^"500 years ago what we are doing would be considered sorcery, sacriledge or some other such hoo hah."

Yeah. I am sure God considers legalizing infanticide "progress".



Sorry, Shirley....but walking in faith means you have to call out evil where it exists.

One thing I have learned in my walk in faith? It is easier to remain silient than to speak out. Being a "lukewarm" Christian? Not acceptable. Being a Warrior? Much preferable.


Also...don't exchange one addiction for another. Be honest with yourself and God and all will fall into place.
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 41
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:21:05 PM
#40 legalizing infanticide? I think you ought to start a thread about that if it's bothering you.


How you 'progressed' to there from the title of this thread is past my understanding..... But, there is much I don't know, I admit.

I leave it to faith and your vast knowledge to enlighten us.
 Million_Reasons
Joined: 10/23/2018
Msg: 42
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:27:51 PM
"500 years ago what we are doing would be considered sorcery, sacriledge or some other such hoo hah"


Things we do today in the name of the religion of Science would be considered..."sorcery, sacriledge or some other such hoo hah"

Does that help clarify?
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 43
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:30:21 PM

eah. I am sure God considers legalizing infanticide "progress".
so how does this relate to POF and christianity? if you need to discuss your desires to legalize infanticide that are not in sync with your god's idea of progress maybe start an off topic forum about that rather than trying to hijack this one ?? walking in faith means challenging no you do not have the bead on evil anymore than anybody e find what god convicts in your heart not the convictions you place on others as a human with the full capabilities for evil as any other human being having no right to convict another of it Only God may do that
 Million_Reasons
Joined: 10/23/2018
Msg: 44
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:49:59 PM
Really? How does this relate? If someone suggests humanity has "progressed"....legalizing infanticide....is but one example, based on biblical morality, as to how we have not.

Navigating POF and dating in today's society will require finding an individual who shares the same religious values.


"walking in faith means challenging"

Challenging who? God?


" no you do not have the bead on evil anymore than anybody e find what god convicts in your heart not the convictions you place on others as any other human being having no right to convict another of it Only God may do that"


Yeah. Under many circumstances I might agree with this but on this particular example I am going to disagree.
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 45
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Posted: 2/27/2019 6:51:10 PM
#42 Personally, I don't consider science a religion. And, 500 yrs. ago science was EXACTLY the type of THINKING that earned the badge of sorcery, sacriledge, heresy or whatever name those who didn't understand cared to apply.

Just ask Davinci, Copernicus and any other great minds from the past who were ahead of the times in regards to their thought and insights that make the world what we are today. Too bad, because of ignorance they had to hide their lights of creativity.

Sometimes what we do in the name of religion scares me more than science ever did.... Science gives us the ability to make bigger more destructive weapons. Religion tells us how to use them as people use their beliefs as a guide in how to treat others.

Seems it's just caused a lot of wars in our past and now too as far as I can see.

And OP.... Yes, I do think Christianity and POF can be combined. As long as you realize there are good people everywhere and they come with many different outlooks on life. Perhaps they just need to be given a chance.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 46
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Posted: 2/27/2019 7:39:42 PM
me^^ too drink with jam and bread-luv your screen name!? i was oh an italian!? than i broke it down, and realized too funny the assumptions i can make.. found myself singing.. any wide reaching platform will have a wealth of diverse belief systems-there is no shortage of christians anywhere-there is a dearth of other diversities on this cite as far as i can tell.
 Doremi_Fasolatido
Joined: 2/14/2009
Msg: 47
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Posted: 2/27/2019 7:55:46 PM
^^ 46. My name is indeed music and I am not a bit Italian. And I also noticed a lot of POF ladies are Christian or are looking for a Christian guy. I am looking for lasagna. Or, a good thin crust pizza.
 Inicia
Joined: 10/11/2018
Msg: 48
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Posted: 2/27/2019 8:13:25 PM
well lasagna is italian- pizza quasi italian do maybe a little italian in your tastebuds? there are a ton of the christians seeking christians on pof i think they come up more often in searches when we state, in profile questionnaire, That religion and spirituality are very important to us..Rather than somewhat important Or irrelevant
 SurelyIamShirley
Joined: 7/22/2016
Msg: 49
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/27/2019 9:31:38 PM
This is so great to see people on POF discussing Christianity in this way! As the OP, I feel a bit responsible to comment on the posts that feel most relevant to me. I hope you don't mind.

#37 Baldwin
>>>so the change was when you strayed from your true self. discovery would be, learning what caused the change and how to avoid the temptation to take easier paths.

Very good point. It’s hard to be Christian when you want to do the things you were brought up to believe were wrong.

#38 Inicia
And "I repent" means when we feel the conviction , it will be allowed via our spirit resting in the heart of God.

It’s interesting that you use the word conviction because a common saying among the girl’s at Teen Challenge is “I feel so convicted”, even for something as small as sneaking that second coffee when they are allowed only one in the morning. Caffeine is addictive, you see. 99% will pray for forgiveness. Very small, protected world they have there.

#39 Doremi
Since you started this thread I figured I'd throw in this 2 cents worth and ask how you feel about folks who don't think there is a God? What about others who believe in a God and or religion but not the one you follow?

I don’t have all the answers but I believe that the only way to Salvation is to believe that Christ died for your sins and that your repentance, probably over and over again is the only way we can join him in heaven. It is not for me to judge others, whether they be atheists or Budhists, etc. and the Bible teaches us that we are all loved by God.

#39 Doremi
I ask because everyone here in this thread and on the forum here [for the most part] seem like nice folks wanting to share experiences and ideas. We all have life experiences and some more than others. I am just glad to be able to share others thoughts and experiences on this medium.

Like you say, it is nice to share with love, compassion and respect. The Bible has been a source of contention between people and nations for centuries yet I read that the Bible was first put into book form in 1611, yet existed long before that. It apparently took 1300 to 1500 years to be written by 40 different authors all inspired by God.

#40 MR said
Sorry, Shirley....but walking in faith means you have to call out evil where it exists[/.quote]
You are right in that there are terrible things happening in the world today when we profess to be ‘civilized’ but there have been horrendous happening in the past too. I believe that we have to look to God for the answers and I am trying very hard to hear them.

#43 Inicia explains this very well IMO
walking in faith means challenging no you do not have the bead on evil anymore than anybody e find what god convicts in your heart not the convictions you place on others as a human with the full capabilities for evil as any other human being having no right to convict another of it Only God may do that.


#44 MR
"walking in faith means challenging"
Challenging who? God?

The phrase “walk by faith” is found in 2 Corinthians 5:7 which reads literally from the Greek text, “for by means of faith we walk, and not by means of sight.” The term “walk” is being used figuratively to mean our manner of life or the way we conduct ourselves on a daily basis. If a Christian is walking by faith, his daily life is predominantly governed by learned biblical principles, and he/she is being led by the Holy Spirit. Walking by faith also reflects the fact we are to simply trust God in all things that happen in our daily walk, especially with regard to those things we don’t understand. This is not easy, especially for new believers. As we grow, however, we learn how trustworthy He is, and trusting Him in all things becomes easier. When we learn to trust Him in all things, we can have a deep and abiding peace.
If one is not walking by faith, their daily life is governed or controlled by human or worldly principles and values that are not divine. This is called "walking by sight" in this same passage.
https://www.returntotheword.com/What-Does-It-Mean-To-Walk-By-Faith-RttW
We know that the internet is not infallible but this definition seems to agree with what I have learned and am reaching for.

#45 Doremi
And OP.... Yes, I do think Christianity and POF can be combined. As long as you realize there are good people everywhere and they come with many different outlooks on life. Perhaps they just need to be given a chance.

I agree. Thank you for that insight and on that note, good night.....Day 8!
 BaldwinMotionPhaseIII
Joined: 10/15/2018
Msg: 50
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Christianity and POF - Can they be combined?
Posted: 2/28/2019 10:01:31 AM
Yeah. I am sure God considers legalizing infanticide "progress"."

>>>seems like He was ok killing first born children of Egypt, back when Moses and the band were playing there.

"but I believe that the only way to Salvation is to believe that Christ died for your sins"

>>>i'm not sure that Ghandi believed it, but i'd like to think when he reached whatever was on the other side, he got a hall pass if he did not. and obviously there are those who take Holy Communion who shouldn't be saved. Perhaps those who live like Jesus of Nazareth, son of Joseph, get in. Otherwise, if God allows so many millions of non Christians worship falsely...that doesn't seem too fair. And what about the humans who lived before Jesus came to earth, what happens to their souls? If we compare vengeful Yahaweh to a loving New Testament God, does He Who Shall Not Be Named sound like a human who grows up and matures (and learns only from example that floods are bad)? that's my take on it. i still wonder if Jesus came to save the Jews, or to lead them away (astray?) to a different religion we know as Christianity, where the dietary laws are lax, the Ten Commandments are only two, God is not vengeful after all, and et cetera.
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