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Show ALL Forums  > Dating Experiences  > problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing      Home login  
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 wood_smell_as_sweet
Joined: 2/20/2019
Msg: 126
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishingPage 6 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
"Yeah I get the deal with most of that... but so what if a student sees you?
A bit of gentle ribbing perhaps, some whispers and sing maybe, I thought online dating was less 'taboo' now than it was seen in previous times."

More than gentle ribbing and whispers could be at stake. High school girls might pose as older just to persuade him to send them d**k pics. They could get him into trouble.
 FFS38
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 127
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/4/2019 3:21:58 PM

More than gentle ribbing and whispers could be at stake. High school girls might pose as older just to persuade him to send them d**k pics. They could get him into trouble.


Yes but that would be a fault of his own making.
And should he really be doing things like that if he's a teacher?

I'm still not sold on it as valid reason for no picture, that would mean it would be open to abuse for anyone cheating on a partner, just by saying they're a teacher.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 128
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/4/2019 11:20:42 PM
I see lots of teachers on POF. I stand by what I say about a guy who isn't willing to make his pic public a coward. I live in a less populated area and recognize many of the guys online. I know that by posting my profile with pic, a lot of people I know will see me on POF but I figure that's just part of putting yourself out there. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
 ssm508
Joined: 5/27/2018
Msg: 129
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 9:25:43 AM

julystorm22 brought up a good point earlier, and its that some women suspect a man with no picture is hiding something and could be married or involved in a relationship.

Perhaps but people with pictures aren't always being completely honest either. The picture(s) can be old, deceptive, or even fake.
 FFS38
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 130
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 10:41:39 AM

Perhaps but people with pictures aren't always being completely honest either. The picture(s) can be old, deceptive, or even fake.


Yes but it's a pointless excercise, as all their efforts will come to nothing and they will be exposed when (or should) they meet.
 spectravision
Joined: 3/20/2019
Msg: 131
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 11:33:03 AM
^^ My local area is full to the brim with Women that have 3 to 4 + years old pics on profile and some even still have pics from when I first come on here back in early 2013. It doesn't look good for them when you've been on and off here when dating. These are the types that ignore your messages and these Women are real. Not fake accounts.

I just roll my eyes. Laugh, and laugh some more!
 ssm508
Joined: 5/27/2018
Msg: 132
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 11:52:48 AM

My local area is full to the brim with Women that have 3 to 4 + years old pics on profile and some even still have pics from when I first come on here back in early 2013.
A picture that is less than 5 years old wouldn't bother me that much. A person that is 43 years old may not look that much now compared to when (s)he was 40. It's when there are obvious major physical changes. Such as person gaining a lot of weight since the time those pictures were taken or using pictures that were taken 10 years ago.
 _Cinnamon__Girl_
Joined: 3/28/2016
Msg: 133
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 12:36:25 PM
Lots of men's profiles here have pics which are 10-20 years old. Many guys are proud of their military service, and should be- but some put only very old "Army days" pics up.
Some profiles pics even show men with long sideburns. Greg Brady hair, and 70s eyeglasses.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 134
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 1:03:51 PM

I see lots of teachers on POF. I stand by what I say about a guy who isn't willing to make his pic public a coward.

It shouldn't be because there are teachers who do have a public pic up. There's truck drivers who have a pic drinking a beer -- should all truck drivers do that because you can find that out and about?

The person with the real issue is not getting a picture from someone who they haven't even spoken to. They don't owe you squat, my dear. :) Not until you two start talking. I've been hit up by gals without public pics but when they initiated a message to me, it came with one. Why in the hell should I be calling them out as a coward??
 FFS38
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 135
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 1:40:14 PM
I think the issue here why some folks don't have a picture up is probably one of two.

1) Probably a matter of deception (risking a friend of the partner seeing them on here)

2) They may not be very confident about their looks but the site provides some kind of social interaction with the opposite sex, where the visual side can be overlooked, imagined even.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 136
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 2:02:29 PM

I think the issue here why some folks don't have a picture up is probably one of two.

1) Probably a matter of deception (risking a friend of the partner seeing them on here)

2) They may not be very confident about their looks but the site provides some kind of social interaction with the opposite sex, where the visual side can be overlooked, imagined even.

I don't think it's #2 so much. I think that was more prevalent from back in the days before MySpace. :)

I think #1 is there, but that's not the main reason. There's still this "tackiness" (for lack of a better word) to the whole online dating thing for many people. To what degree, varies. But for those who are new to the online thing, or haven't really dabbled much in it over the years -- they can be awkward about it. Kind of like being seen going into a Care Bears movie when you're in grade school and are a guy. :)

But that usually wears off if/when they get pretty involved in the online dating scene (and realize that no-pic means much fewer cumming to you). IMO, at least with ladies, if they are active in the online dating site, and have had no pic for quite some time for many months -- that's when I would think cheating would be a decent possibility... or ixnaying on public websites about personal life (teacher, coach, etc). But they should have a private photo on ready-5 to show the people they wish to talk with.
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 137
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 2:41:12 PM
Maybe, but the guy isn't posting his pic because he is a chicken shit. He's afraid a woman won't like his pic or he's afraid of someone he knows seeing him on an online dating site. He's only haff-assing putting himself out there.
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 138
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 3:16:45 PM

Maybe, but the guy isn't posting his pic because he is a chicken shit.

Again, not necessarily. If you're a teacher or a coach in a small town -- you might want to keep your private life not so public. I don't see why you're so bent out of shape about it. He doesn't owe you squat; you don't know the guy. You're yelling at shadows. :) If he writes you, and doesn't have a picture to show you on the spot -- then you complain.
 FFS38
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 139
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 3:45:50 PM

I don't see why you're so bent out of shape about it. He doesn't owe you squat; you don't know the guy. You're yelling at shadows. :) If he writes you, and doesn't have a picture to show you on the spot -- then you complain.


Maybe it's the "creepy" factor for women concerning guys without a pic, they know what YOU look like....but these women don't know what they look like, particularly if they're from the same neighbourhoods
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 140
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/5/2019 6:09:24 PM
That is it. I do find it creepy. And there is always that thought that the reason the guy isn't posting his pic is because he's already in a relationship. I just could never trust a guy without a photo.
 am70sguy
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 141
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 2:26:21 AM
No pic, no contact or return contact. They see me, I expect the same in return.
 BaldwinMotionPhaseIII
Joined: 10/15/2018
Msg: 142
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 9:46:12 AM
i don't put a pic up b/c i'm at a public library to get around "expulsion junction", and i'm sure not going to bring in a download. but, i get the idea that no photo looks odd. the last time i went to a single's dance, a former teacher of mine was there, and watching her get felt up on the dance floor...ew. i can imagine not wanting a photo on a single's site. but then, i also agree, good luck getting a date here without one. maybe teachers should just stick to dating students like the good ol' days :)
 norwegianguy456
Joined: 6/11/2015
Msg: 143
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 10:09:17 AM

Maybe it's the "creepy" factor for women concerning guys without a pic, they know what YOU look like....but these women don't know what they look like, particularly if they're from the same neighbourhoods

First, almost all profiles aren't going to be people who almost live next door to you (neighborhood). Second, it doesn't require you to have a profile at all, to see someone else's profile.

One should be freaked out on Facebook if they don't have a picture of themselves as their photo (nor any photos of themselves), but (gasp) can see yours with your photo on it! Many people need a facebook profile for the use of other things (apps). Who cares. People are going to see some basics of your profile.

And how about them wedding photos in the newspaper? How Dare any readers not provide their own photos to the newspaper saying they saw it! How creepy if they don't! ;)
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 144
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 10:32:34 AM

1) Probably a matter of deception (risking a friend of the partner seeing them on here)

2) They may not be very confident about their looks but the site provides some kind of social interaction with the opposite sex, where the visual side can be overlooked, imagined even.


I think some people just come here to chat or post on the forums, so they figure they don't need a picture.
I've had pictures on here for years and I've yet to have someone I know see it.
I did have someone walk into the bookstore once and say "Hi Boo" which surprised me, as that's not what my name tag says.

But I have met people that look nothing like their picture.
And there's the people that have multiple profiles with different pictures.

Not much you can do but meet people in person and not get all worked up about them beforehand.
 FFS38
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 145
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 11:10:34 AM

First, almost all profiles aren't going to be people who almost live next door to you (neighborhood). Second, it doesn't require you to have a profile at all, to see someone else's profile.


I've seen plenty of women from my neighborhood, one I see regularly from my same street lol.


And how about them wedding photos in the newspaper? How Dare any readers not provide their own photos to the newspaper saying they saw it! How creepy if they don't! ;)


My original comment was just a basic summarisation of why women perhaps are uncomfortable with picture less profiles, whereas you seem to be taking it much further and deeper by analysing the nature of stalking to the nth degree lol.
Of course there's no foolproof method of avoiding getting stalked if someone is determined enough.


I did have someone walk into the bookstore once and say "Hi Boo" which surprised me, as that's not what my name tag says.


Well that is unusual, because your name tag does say boo here in the UK?


Not much you can do but meet people in person and not get all worked up about them beforehand.


It's not me personally getting worked up, was just commenting on others.
problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/6/2019 11:21:49 PM

And how about them wedding photos in the newspaper? How Dare any readers not provide their own photos to the newspaper saying they saw it! How creepy if they don't! ;)


Apples and oranges. Two completely different scenarios. With online dating, people are advertising themselves for the sake of potential correspondence with others. A couple putting their wedding picture in the paper is merely showing off.

At any rate, whether anyone likes it or not, having no pictures is going to result in a huge struggle to get anyone's attention. One can either adapt or piss and moan for the rest of eternity. No one is going to care, understand, or sympathize.


I've seen plenty of women from my neighborhood, one I see regularly from my same street lol.


I don't know if I've seen anyone from directly within my neighborhood, but I've seen many people in my general vicinity. I've had people recognize me from here out in public, as well. A few of those occasions were a bit amusing.
 CBGB77
Joined: 12/15/2017
Msg: 147
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/7/2019 7:33:52 AM

Posted By: browneyesboo on 5/6/2019 1234 PM
Subject: problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing

I think some people just come here to chat or post on the forums, so they figure they don't need a picture.
I've had pictures on here for years and I've yet to have someone I know see it.
I did have someone walk into the bookstore once and say "Hi Boo" which surprised me, as that's not what my name tag says.



Hey Boo,I love what you've done with your hair!
 browneyesboo
Joined: 1/17/2018
Msg: 148
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/7/2019 7:42:42 AM
^^^ Thank you so much, Mr. CBG!
 julystorm22
Joined: 6/15/2018
Msg: 149
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/7/2019 7:48:43 AM
When you live in a less populated place, there's a not unlikely shot a person is gonna know you, if not by name than by look. Putting your profile and pic on there takes a little bit more bravery because POF in a rural area is more like being in a fishbowl. And getting contacted by someone on POF without a pic seems unfair. I need a pic so I can know if the guy is someone's ex I know or a relative or somebody else I know. And I have been contacted enough on POF by people I know who don't even know me, including a cousin who sent me a really awful pickup line. Not to mention my friend's husband who I didn't know it was him because he had a pic of a sunset rather than himself.
 RoxyMoronic
Joined: 3/1/2019
Msg: 150
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problems with time wasters and unexplainable vanishing
Posted: 5/7/2019 8:00:48 AM
You look stunning Boo :)
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