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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?      Home login  
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 Glenoran1
Joined: 3/1/2009
Msg: 124
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?Page 13 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
Yes, that is a tricky topic. My guy was a science teacher, and believed that romance was an artificial, phony sentiment. Yet he often liked to surprise me by taking me someplace special (like a location here on Vancouver Island we hadn't explored yet).

I realized early on that, unless it is a warped expression, one should accept love in the form your partner is comfortable giving it, and reciprocate in ways he or she is comfortable receiving it. So, that's what I did.

Now, though, I need to learn how to be romantic to at least some extent, in case the fella who becomes my boyfriend and hopefully life mate appreciates romance. So I've been reading this Thread with great interest. Thanks, Sandy, for posting it, and thanks, folks, for adding your input.
 varinia
Joined: 1/1/2009
Msg: 125
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 8/4/2009 8:52:50 PM
To me romance is about doing and saying little things that are above and beyond the necessities to keep the relationship going. Little things to show the other that you are/have been thinking about the other or that they're on your mind.

So, within that framework it can take on any kind of shape: sending a funny hallmark card via email - being in a fancy restaurant, going to the bathroom, taking off your panties and when you sit down, giving them to him under the table - cooking a favorite meal....basically anything that tells the other person that you're thinking of them.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 126
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/19/2009 4:26:34 PM
So its agreed. Women never put an equal amount of effort because women who claim to understand men say we don't need as much.

Well since you think men don't need it maybe we should stop doing any romancing too.
 CntryGal
Joined: 3/11/2005
Msg: 127
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/20/2009 11:31:11 AM
Yes, I know how to romance my guy. But I also enjoy courting... the problems I've had in the past is... the men I tried to court thought I was too clingy. Gee, does that mean he's not ready for a relationship? No, I don't court by calling every 5 minutes... not even once a day. But I will slide a note on your winshield or something silly. It doesn't take much to share feelings. If you are both on the same level... all should be ok. I haven't even been in a relationship for a while. It's exhausting. Whew! lol
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 128
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/20/2009 7:12:06 PM

Women overindulge men by a landslide.


Since when?
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 129
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/29/2009 9:49:26 PM
Women are treated better in all aspects of life. This is no exception.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AhY94xCDsmoIGIW1_isyjNfsy6IX;_ylv=3?qid=20090929213134AAiwIz0
 jacob8088
Joined: 9/6/2009
Msg: 130
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/29/2009 10:15:17 PM
Screw the romantic situations. Just having her on her knees looking up and staring into my eyes will beat out any romantic experience, on any given day.
 3Therm0pylae0
Joined: 5/11/2009
Msg: 131
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 9/30/2009 1:30:51 AM
Dear beautiful lady, please accept my undying respect for you actually highlighting a less-fortunate aspect of womankind's emotional/psych. makeup these days. I've found that most ladies are of the impression that guys don't have needs and that the whole relationship is about the Ms. involved and the Mr. is supposed to be her knight, asking for nothing and giving all.

I don't play that game and have been accused of some absurdities for reacting apropriately when my supposed "loving girlfriend" or ex-fiance' wouldn't even do things I'd get scorched for not doing.

You are awesome.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 132
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/21/2009 6:47:16 PM
I saw this on another site.


-taught me how to drive a manual transmission via his 1956 porsche speedster convertible, a car that meant the world to him, a car that had been on the cover of excellence mag

-brought me breakfast (including homemade cinnamon rolls!) in bed, every weekend, along with a copy of the sunday nyt

-bought me flowers, for no reason whatsoever

-overheard me tell my best friend that i couldn't find a nail polish to match a certain indian outfit that i was wearing for a wedding-- so he had his friends at a certain shop (think similar to "west coast customs") create the most glorious enamel to surprise me with, shot with three kinds of pearl

-knew that i'd be heartbroken that my beloved siamese fighting fish died, so he desperately ran all over town trying to find an identical twin before i got home from work (unsuccessful-- i got home early and found my little "triumph trident" belly up)

-surprised homesick me with a visit during my first semester of grad school (over two years after we broke up!!!) and even brought my fave bare escentuals peppermint shower gel to cheer me, after i absent-mindedly mentioned that i couldn't find it out here.



http://www.sepiamutiny.com/sepia/archives/001007.html


1. It seems most women do have princess syndrome and are MORE selfish than men. This is the RULE. Exceptions DON"T exist.

2. What similar things have women done for men?

3. Ever seen a woman give MORE and be the MORE loving one in the relationship? NEVER right?

4. I can't even think of ONE cool thing a woman taught a man to do. Not even one throughout history. how sad.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 133
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/21/2009 6:51:49 PM
After all who does ALL the initiating of relationships? Women spend more time dating multiple men and thinking about back up options than working on their relationship.

Also who proposes, gets on one knee and buys an engagement ring.


Getting on one knee to bribe a woman to marry you is pretty degrading come to think of it.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 134
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/21/2009 8:45:36 PM
If you look at how divorces turn out it is men who are giving up a lot to be married. Giving up their house, accounts, custody of their kids etc

Changing your name is a very minor thing.


and making cookies isn't the same as teaching your partner something interesting.

have you heard of something similar to a man teaching a woman to drive in a certain way? women don't usually even know anything cool to teach.

maybe if they did they would get more respect and be admired for things other than looks.

Men truly do give more.


 Minau
Joined: 9/2/2007
Msg: 135
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/21/2009 9:46:15 PM
I know...my bad...I could learn a thing or two from some of the guys I've dated...but I'm not that bad...I've planned a really nice ski trip for his birthday with champagne and roses waiting for us at the hotel and it was all a surprise
 girlwPriOriTies
Joined: 9/30/2009
Msg: 136
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/21/2009 11:47:21 PM
i honestly have done nothing. sorry
 thiguy
Joined: 9/13/2009
Msg: 137
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 12:03:05 PM
There is another thread discussing why relationships don't seem to work as well as they did in past generations and one of the common responses is a lack of give/give in relationships today and the independent mentality of the modern day woman.
Both of these statements have a lot to do with this topic.

I have been in two long term, serious relationships, one with a woman closer to my age and one with a woman 10 years younger and both lacked an understanding of who I was and what I wanted whereas I made it a point to understand their needs and cater to them. I mention the age difference because it isn't just confined to a specific generation.

I was raised by a single mother who taught me to be respectful and understanding/sensitive to a woman’s needs so I naturally was a giver when in a relationship. If I recognize she had a bad day I would have a nice dinner, generally something she really loved, along with her favorite flowers waiting for her when she got home followed by a massage to relax her. I obviously didn’t do this every time something happened and I would do these things randomly as well even if everything was fine but to ever just expect anything like this out of them was ridiculous.

The thing is, their views on relationships were both very similar. Both were very intelligent, beautiful, career oriented and had outward confidence and they viewed me as just a “bonus” to their already “amazing lives”. A SO to these women are purely utilitarian and disposable. They don’t open up emotionally and try very hard to project a strong and confident facades. They made a concerted effort to remind me that they didn’t need a man in their lives but at the same time were very needy and possessive behind closed doors. One of them went as far as to tell me that it’s not a woman’s job to do anything for a man and if she did I should consider it a privilege for just being with her but at the same time expected complete devotion to her needs. I don’t want to make general statements about any one type of woman because they are all different and I have only dated a very small percentage of these women in a constant area but I will say that a majority of the women that I have dated in the 23-35 age range have pretty much had a similar mentality as the two that I had long relationships with, especially the ones with professional careers, which is what I was/am attracted to.
 TodaysCatch
Joined: 4/12/2008
Msg: 138
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 1:09:21 PM
Wow . . .thiguy said it like I've experienced it, and he lives 3000 miles from me. It looks like it's not just a local phenomenon . . .

Sprainedheart (great handle, btw), you are one in a thousand. Please don't change, and talk up your exploits with your most gossipy friends. The word needs to be spread on this subject.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 139
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 1:22:01 PM
Gee.... don't you girls out there know how to be romantic to/for a man,or do most women expect romance 'from the other half ? I always thought 'romance' was a two way adventure.I know "I" get huge satisfaction from doing something sweet and romantic for my guy....what are your experiences been you out men out there ? and you gals too:)


I tried to romance my man of what I read from my favorite romance books Harlequin, but he told me to """ Cut The Crap """!!!!!! so abruptly, I lied on my back,spread my legs and raise my feet to heaven....... So now I am on the street of Plentyoffish looking for a date,or LTR whatever comes first, and I promise myself not to read anymore Harlequin books but the novel of Jackie Collins and Judith Krentz..... Arabian angel I did not know this funny side of you, >ate the wrong petal ! that is hilarious .lol
 Arabianangel
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 140
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 1:22:08 PM
I once surprised a guy by getting edible rose petals scattered around the house..only he didn't even notice and ate the wrong petal...
 thiguy
Joined: 9/13/2009
Msg: 141
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 1:26:36 PM
Todayscatch: Darn, I was hoping it was just in my area.
 licoricecat_1
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 142
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 1:30:26 PM
Eyes are huge....I read eyes well. Knowing your partner. Humor and clicking and laughing together is huge. Experimenting, playing, knowing what your partner is passionate about and finding small items that are sentimental including what they are passionate about. Giving them a gift certificate in what they are passionate about. Going to an event that you know they would enjoy. Buying something with the logo or patch of what they are passionate about. Making their favorate meal with candlelight. Sitting around a fire with blanket and glass of wine or sparkling grape juice or hot apple cider and soft music. There's a ton of things. Know your partner and what he/she is passionate about.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 143
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 6:26:34 PM
I think that everyone's idea of romance is different person to person never mind between men or women...
I think that it's a good idea to find out what is MEANINGFUL to YOUR partner and then go from there...
Sometimes one person's idea of romance is totally lost on another person...and sometimes romance is really just a simple gesture, rather than a big production...
Go forth and...ROMANCE each other!!!
As for women getting the "better part" of it or expecting more...Amazing how ALL of you guys saying that just KEPT ON staying with someone who was selfish and self-centered rather than just leave and find someone who understands that reciprocity is the key...?
I mean rather than being bitter, how about taking some responsibility for wasting your OWN time and energy???
 BlueEyes1712
Joined: 4/24/2008
Msg: 144
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 6:36:21 PM
My former girlfriend use to set the mood in her bedroom, light a scented candle, put on some of that peaceful mind relaxing music and start acting more sensual. It was nice having her focus on me through this way. I realize she was getting what she wanted but was all good regardless.
I actually purchased a book because I had no idea how to give a women what they want. It was a good thing cause it gave me a few ideas into the workings of a womens mind and what they want from thier man. We are clueless, we try but its true we think completely different in many regards.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 145
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/22/2009 7:04:04 PM
One woman asked why didn't the guys leave?

Good question.


If a guy wants a woman he has to accept the fact that she will give less and be the more selfish one. There is no way around this. A man who is dating has already accepted this.
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 146
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/23/2009 10:04:33 PM
Women are MORE selfish than men. So how can romance EVER be equal?




And frankly, I think they're simpler to understand and easier to please than women are.


http://forums.plentyoffish.com/3629599datingPostpage3.aspx
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 147
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Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/23/2009 10:15:37 PM
Some ppl like to please and some do something different...no two men or women are the same.

I have always been very romantic to the "One" in my heart...but found the men not to be as romantic (poor choices, who knows)...but as one who is a giver, this never bothered me.
It makes me feel good to be this way...so back to what I first said...

^^^As for "Women being more selfish" it goes both ways...^^^

There are "GIVERS and TAKERS"
You just have to hope to find the same romantic kind of partner.
Heres to hopeing...
 head.cloud123
Joined: 5/29/2009
Msg: 148
Why Is It Women Don't Seem To Know How To ROMANCE A Man?
Posted: 10/23/2009 10:21:51 PM
No it doesn't go both ways. Of course men might be selfish but that is the exception.


Just think about all men do for women. Men provide, protect and nurture MORE than women do, give more emotional support, act chivalrous, give more affection, give more in bed, accommodate women more than vice versa, are easier to please and deal with, are less critical of women, initiate everything, pay for everything etc etc etc

Most women date multiple men and always keep back up options. The average dude doesn't have as many women chasing him as the average women has men chasing her. Men don't even get to pick who to have sex with. Men display women choose. Men bear 100% of the rejection.

Women always marry up (financially and in terms of looks/personality), are always more picky and always have more partners.

Women are the center of sexual attention not men. Women can't even give men this type of attention and we're supposed to believe women are giving men romance?
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