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 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 585
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!Page 13 of 32    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32)
That sucks @volcano, some people are just ***holes. It could be an regional deal but I don't want to say that as I lived on the West Coast for the last two years and found most of the people there to be pretty friendly and laid back. The women there I encountered were a bit more aggressive than the women I encountered down south which is another reason why I liked it there. Granted I never made it to the LA area, I was mostly in the Bay area and in Northern California whenever I made it to Cali.
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 586
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/17/2014 12:58:05 PM
I have, but I spend more time in Europe. Although I still see people glued to their celphones everywhere I go, it seems people tend to at least make more eye contact with you. In LA, you just dont exist.

LA is more laid back, I think anywhere where there is alot of sunshine, you tend to get more of that. Interesting, I never considered LA to be a overly friendly place..but I've certainly been to more miserable places..London, for one. I love London but man. People seem so beaten down and sedate there.

LA isnt miserable, but it's very self centered, very "what can you do for ME?"

It's so funny to walk into a social event and have everyone ignore you, then when they find out you work for a film studio they start falling all over themselves.

Just retarded. Like wow-suddenly I am worth something, but not because of ME. Because of what I am connected to.

Nice.

PS And no, it does NOT help me get dates. Men dont care where you work, They want you to be hot. :D

It's true!
 Blackwood85
Joined: 5/20/2013
Msg: 587
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/17/2014 1:10:01 PM
One thing you have to remember is that due to anonymity the internet is filled with idiots. The Greater Internet ****wad Theory (GIFT) people are anonymous and they have an audience so they troll, make racist, sexist, bigoted, hateful remarks and they go about their business because there are no real world consequences to their actions. It's sad but true.
 VolkanoKing
Joined: 8/1/2014
Msg: 588
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/17/2014 1:22:12 PM
Oh sure. Most of the stuff that is said online would NEVER be said to someone's face. The anonymity, just like being behind the wheel of a car, naturally brings out aggression. You say things you would never say otherwise...start fights, call names, say really cruel things. It brings out a sort of stupid bravery. Most comment sections today are just verbal fist fights and always over the same stuff.
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 589
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/17/2014 1:29:32 PM
I am sorry if I brought up any unpleasant memories volkano. I think I have a friend that you can relate to as well. She works for a government organization and I am very proud of her (I brag about her all the time). She has trouble meeting men too. I see her going on dates every so often, and she is pretty, but I don't see her relationships lasting very long, a few months tops. I remember when I first met her, some people didnt talk to her until they learned she worked for a big popular government organization. After that, they were all over her light white on rice.

I wonder why she hangs out with me sometimes. I mean, I am an all around average joe from looks to profession. I am more of a big kid than an adult. I know she is very popular, but she has such trouble in the realm of romance, it is beyond me. I hope she does meet a great guy some day.
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 590
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/17/2014 8:25:18 PM

I am glad to see that there are so many perfect women out there deserving of the perfect man.


And some of them have even been searching 40-50 years for him.


Studies in human behavior even suggest that many people prefer negative attention over no attention at all. Look at children (and adults) who misbehave just for attention.


This is entirely true.
There was even a Twilight Zone episode about an astronaut who was placed in an isolation chamber to see how long he could be alone before he cracked up, as part of his training for going into space alone.
 spot4username
Joined: 6/19/2007
Msg: 593
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/19/2014 8:56:19 AM

I guess I just never heared much from the women with this problem.


Really? I said this back in message 239... and lots and lots of women have said this in these forums. I don't actually know any women who get hundreds of messages. Perhaps if one of my attractive friends moved to a large city she would get a lot of messages. I guess we are counting the u sexi as messages? /eyeroll
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 594
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/19/2014 9:14:22 AM
Really? I said this back in message 239... and lots and lots of women have said this in these forums. I don't actually know any women who get hundreds of messages. Perhaps if one of my attractive friends moved to a large city she would get a lot of messages. I guess we are counting the u sexi as messages? /eyeroll


Of course not every women literally gets dozens or hundreds of messages in a week. But I think women on average in particular the ones under 40 get more messages than men do because of the ratio and a higher percentage of men will make first contact. The gender ratio starts to even out after 40.

Some women have mentioned the lack of quality among the types of men that sent them emails. I would rather have this problem instead of receiving very few or no emails. Even if I wasn't interested in most of the women that contacted me, I still could have dates with the women that I liked.
 CharminC
Joined: 2/19/2011
Msg: 595
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/19/2014 11:53:08 AM
I don't actually know any women who get hundreds of messages

^^^^^
I've conducted the experiment of 'what happens when I put up attractive and sexy pics'.
The number of mail rises. The sexier or more attractive the picture, the more the mail.
Therefore I believe it when its said that we get more mail.
Men really are such visual creatures.
But to be fair though, women are too.

To me, after all the years on pof, I've concluded that this is a site where the eyes see first then the brain processes what you see and read... that is if you read anything. What the pof'r sees... makes all the difference to the result of your profile. (Hence , thank god for the profile review forum to assist you if you should ever need to change the results)
 activemelaney
Joined: 9/8/2012
Msg: 596
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/19/2014 12:29:59 PM
Not only are males visual creatures but a healthy well-adjusted male is a visual creature. It is in our human socio biological evolution. We are not robots. It is also not, by chance that we women are attracted to a confident, capable male. Again, it is in our very essence.

Yes, my guy loves me for my personality but there is also a positive bonding in him wanting me for my still sexy body. This physical attraction is not 'secondary' in nature.

If I let my hair down, put on a dress with a hint of cleavage, heels...I know I am going to turn the head of most males between 18 and 75 when I walk into the grocery store. It's no different OLD. There is nothing weird or unhealthy about a male contacting a female he has a physical attraction to. Nothing unhealthy about a bit of stirring in the lower parts.

Similar with we women. We look for certain variables in a man's profile. . Fitness level, education, profession, lifestyle, etc. This is completely rational as humans. The attributes that attracts the sexes to each other existed during Cro Magnon times and are more or less the same in the fifty thousand years since.

The level of attractiveness and subsequent number of messages are going to reflect this.
 basilisk123
Joined: 12/17/2011
Msg: 597
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 5:58:28 AM
"The core point is women have too much power in the dating game and women reject men for sport, never realizing that doing that only motivates men to go for a little payback. And so the vicious circle of both sexes mistreating each other continues."-batpool123

Sounds like someone has some issues...

Seriously, it just comes down to how much power you give the other person. Women only have the "power" because the men they are with gives them that "power", and vise versa.

Hatred and anger will only shackle you for as long as you let it. It doesn't have to be that way. Let it go, and you can at least move foward.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 598
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 6:31:18 AM
@batpool.........

Would LOVE to know how many ugly women/women that you're not attracted to that YOU, personally have dated...LOL
Because I HAVE and with some the chemistry came AFTER, and some never...
Puhlease...gimme a break with all of the women this and women that...if I or any other women that I know actually HAD all of this "power" that you speak of, I'd be ruling the WORLD by now! lolol

Get serious and stop blaming your problems on women...try looking at yourself for a change...Gawd!!!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 602
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 8:16:45 AM

If a woman looks at a man and does not like the LOOK of him, she does not care about him at all………NOT AT ALL.

Yes, as opposed to men who date anyone and everyone who have interest in them regardless of physical attraction (eyeroll). Right.

hat’s the shallow and simple mind at work. The practical mind knows, chemistry is fleeting. You can have the “passion, fire, hunger,” etc. With just about anyone reasonably attractive and NEW. But even with the hottest guy or girl on the planet. That newness fades in a few months or years.

In order to fade, it first has to be there. We can't rekindle what never was. The answer isn't to bypass the initial attraction - without that, what's the point?

But your right. You do have to be attracted but there is something wrong with demanding things that you don't have yourself. As I said earlier, for some strange women online think that online dating will change the laws of physics. That is, they think an average women will end-up with above average men because they met on dating site.

Again - and men don't do this? Right. Who cares what someone wants? It only matters that they are OK with what their options are based on that want. If they are OK with being single forever for unrealistic standards - so what? This affects no one else.

Before online dating came in, women had to be realistic, and couldn’t afford to be too picky, else they ran the risk of going dateless. Today, online dating makes a vast range of choices available to women.

Some of us were going dateless if we couldn't find what we liked way before online dating came along. Going dateless isn't the end of the world, you know. Many of us have other things going on in our lives - so dating isn't something we HAVE to be doing.

Batpool, I take it you don't date at all if this is your take on women? To be actively dating would be kind of trying to frustrate yourself if you're sure no women will be worth the time anyway - or are you another "all women suck won't someone come along and prove me wrong" daters? This attitude is likely real prevalent in your interactions with women and they are reacting to the vibe if they aren't panning out like you hope they would.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 606
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 8:36:22 AM
@inner...
Well said...but unfortunately a misogynist RARELY if ever changes his spots...
Although I DO appreciate all of the men responding, as seeing as this guy has ZERO respect for women and their opinions, maybe, just MAYBE he might listen to a MAN!!!

I doubt it though...SOME men just hate women and then WONDER why they can't get dates!!!

As for looking for an average looking man...well, I am really NOT fussy about looks, don't consider that I have ANY real world advantage that gets translated from on line...

But hey,as I said some guys have women ALL figured out so I believe that they WILL find EXACTLY what they expect in their dating lives....
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 608
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 8:57:12 AM

Oh! I wasn't complaining or putting myself down when I said I was an average woman. I'm actually happy with who I am, where I am at this point in my life.

Yes, this indicates humility - something a LOT of people cannot grasp these days. I know I am average as well, I was raised to consider that in the big picture I am not that big a deal to most people. I want to be important to the people that are important to me - beyond that I don't care.

So while I have some sense of confidence and self worth - I also have a sense of modesty and don't expect that things should be handed to me or that I'm entitled to anything I don't work for. It's simple for me. I find a guy attractive, I go from there. If he finds me attractive and wants to do the same that's what happens - until it doesn't. If he doesn't find me attractive., that's life. I don't lose sleep over this, I don't question myself, I don't rant and rave about how the guy is missing out. I just move on.

Some will like you and some won't - and in the end it's not about blaming anyone for what didn't happen. It's about learning to gracefully process and react to shit that doesn't go the way you want it to in life - there will be a lot of that. It's also learning that some times when something doesn't happen you were better off as it wasn't really for you.

Both men and women need to get over themselves in dating and in life - and realize that not everything will be about them - positively or negatively. And that's actually OK.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 609
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 9:10:35 AM

Some will like you and some won't - and in the end it's not about blaming anyone for what didn't happen. It's about learning to gracefully process and react to shit that doesn't go the way you want it to in life - there will be a lot of that. It's also learning that some times when something doesn't happen you were better off as it wasn't really for you.

Both men and women need to get over themselves in dating and in life - and realize that not everything will be about them - positively or negatively. And that's actually OK.


Yes,it seems some people have a really difficult time when things don't go their way and will persist in passive/aggressive behaviour which is counterproductive, because they feel that they weren't "given their just due"....

Time to grow up and smell the coffee...NOT everything is about YOU, there ARE other people on the planet and realizing that is probably one of the most important lessons in Life....
 patchjoker13
Joined: 8/24/2014
Msg: 610
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 10:04:09 AM
Well, the reality is this. All you have to do is look at these forum, especially the profile review ones, and you see the same common themes. Guys not getting any responses and ladies not being happy with the pool of guys available. The reality is that with the ratio differences along with the traditional approach of the men being the chasers, a frustrating environment is created. And lets be honest, many of the guys on here, including myself, are not the type of guys the ladies are looking for. If most of these guys had the confidence and looks, they would probably not need dating sites. A lot of the ladies I have talked to on these sites choose OLD because they were not happy with available guys and or relationships IRL. They come here and the pool is even less flattering than their old opportunities. That is why the guys have it worse, most of them come from nothing to more nothing, at least the ladies on here come from something to nothing and they have the piece of mind that they are still somewhat desirable. I have sent out tons of messages on this site with very few responses and I don't message the "hot" girls because I am not that delusional. Like I stated before, most men cannot afford to be that picky. Another thing, from some of these women I see the "hey, it's just dating, it's not that serious" approach, but if that were true then more women would give guys a chance who may not be their perfect fit, after all, it's just a date, right.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 611
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 10:53:47 AM

Guys not getting any responses and ladies not being happy with the pool of guys available.


Son, it's been that way since the beginning of time.
Before OLD and other "less conventional" methods( personal ads, matchmakers, singles clubs) existed there was still a lot of stress and anxiety about dating, courtship,marriage/committment...I'm sure that even in cultures where marriages were arranged, that there were disconnects, dissatisfactions, marriages that were internally HORRIBLE,as well as those that were "successful". I'm sure that in every society where women are not absolutely chattels, there are men and women dis-satisfied with the romantic prospects they are meeting.
I have no doubt that even today in modern cultures, there are men and women who are "settling", because to them, the relationship itself is more important than who it is with.
And people are STILL free to "settle" if they so choose.
What is stopping you gentlemen who complain about "overly picky" women, from approaching women that surely get very little attention from men?
Seriously-that is not a "rhetorical" question, I want to KNOW.
Or are you saying even the most pathetic examples of womanhood are turning you down?

Do you feel-IF you are willing to approach women you believe to be WORSE than "heifers"-that EVERYBODY has to adopt your philosophy-and approach, or accept-anyone who will consider having you?

Why aren't you going to places where you believe that desperate and unappealing women might be found? Did you think that OLD was that sort of venue?
I think that most people who use OLD are in fact somewhat idealistic.
There may be those of certain demographic/geographic situations who may not have a large local,easily accessible pool of dating candidates,who've gone online.
I just cringe when I see young, smart, energetic young people/students from fairly populous areas come to online dating sites. It should be easy for them to at least socialize/date right from their day-to-day lives!
I can understand it when older people, busy people, people from rural areas/small towns sign up for online dating, because very often their pool IS considerably smaller.

But really, this thread started out with a guy making some comments about an experience he had with minding a female friends' PoF inbox. "Attacked by ants" I believe is the phrase he used. I don't think he was looking for condemnation of OLD, PoF, women, or anything else. He just wanted to hear people's thoughts. Granted, even the most vituperous attacks on OLD/PoF/people are somebody's thoughts-but good grief- the Universe doesn't OWE anybody-male, female,undecided or mixed gender-dating, romance, relationships.
Signed
the heiferest heifer there could ever be,
Cindy O
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 613
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 11:24:46 AM
^^OK, I'm now convinced that batpool123 is just trying to use a beehive as a pinata and get a rise out of the forum posters here, especially the women. If he really believed what he's posting here he'd be off doing something else. He clearly doesn't like women at all (or would have us all believe that) so this is about getting negative attention responses (this has been pointed out in the forums as being better than being ignored, so there you go).

I call troll.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 616
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 11:40:23 AM
Wonder if he's aware that he is now engaging in the dissemination of hate propaganda...
A crime in Canada where this forum originates, with legal consequences.

Guy must be desperate for attention...
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 617
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 11:40:48 AM
And no of these constantly banged, over-40 women wants YOU- so therefore you will give out a blanket statement of disrespect on them.
Here's a "beware"
Beware the male with a sense that his existence entitles him to p*ssy. Doesn't matter if he's 18 or 80.Whether he's been online 5 minutes or 5 years. Doesn't matter about his looks, his height, his occupation, his race, his belief system,his location.
He sees women as objects and believes that he is ENTITLED to the one of his choice. If he cannot easily acquire that choice, he will attempt a methodology of continually lashing out at women. By that time his bitterness and fristration have so consumed him that no woman that is remotely in her right mind will have anything to do with him. But it is SO EASY to find other factors to blame for his lack of success.
Please understand that the above, while it may be inspired by comments in this thread, is not directed at any specific individual.
Damn it to HELL, people.
Online Dating sites are NOT vending machines for sex, romance or relationships. Posting a profile on one does nOT mean that a womans' ass is available to anyone who approaches, and it sure as hell doesn't mean she's banging every d*ck that waves at her.
Look, just about any woman with a functioning vagina and a nickel in her purse could go to certain locations and come home with a pet penis. Unfortunately us uppity heifers have this screwy-ass idea that we should love-or at least LIKE- and respect the person the penis is attached to. And we expect that same affection and respect in return.
Yeah, there ARE dumbass women who collect the riff-raff, the losers, whatever. but for the most part, reasonably happy couples I've been, seen, known,are just average Joes and average Janes who foumd one of the persons the Universe considered to be right for them.
There ain't no magic, arguments, politics or secrets about it.
Cindy O
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 620
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 1:37:18 PM

This is so funny and borderline pathetic.

It's borderline something, all right. Not sure if "pathetic" is the right word, though.
Everyone has the right to look for whatever the hell it is they want from dating/relationships and sites devoted to such activities. But to spew your anger, frustration and resentment all over the place because it doesn't work exactly like you THINK it should for yourself, isn't going to further your cause in any kind of right direction.
For all the average folks who are happily paired up, there are also those who are single, or those who are unhappily paired up. There are lovely attractive folks of both genders who can't seem to be able to even catch a COLD in the dating scene. And perfectly AWFUL people who seem to always have a partner. Yep, it just ain't fair.
And the day it all BECOMES fair is the day I'll start looking for someplace to hide, because all of our asses are in BIG trouble-the Earth is going to flip its' axis, the aliens are gonna land, a meteor is gonna hit-here comes the big EMP, Armageddon, the Second Coming...you get the picture.
Cindy O
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 623
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 7:59:36 PM

Congrats dude,you said a lot of things about the inequities of OLD that are true.....but you need to drop the bitterness.


This guy is WAAAAAYYYYYY beyond bitter...imo

Actually sounds like a raving lunatic who is on here insulting everyone,left and right...

I mean seriously???
Calling women heifers and sluts if we've been on OLD for longer than two years...etc.

There IS no "point" that is won and/or "argued" in that manner...again,imo

The guy frankly, sounds DANGEROUS to me and I fully expect, from just a FEW of his posts to see his face splashed all OVER the news someday having committed violence against some unsuspecting woman ...

Actually, now that I think about it, probably NOT, seeing as he sounds like a raving lunatic, women will probably continue to avoid him, for exactly THAT reason...
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 624
WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/20/2014 9:37:15 PM

You only got away with this because you're not white. :)


What does race has to do with it? Several posters have called him out for his comments.
 Dee4166
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 626
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WOMEN have a VERY DIFFERENT EXPERIENCE on POF then MEN !!!
Posted: 10/21/2014 3:47:31 AM

You know in the back of your mind there is some crawling doubt that I MIGHT BE RIGHT.


So, let me get, this straight....When you're RIGHT then you're right and when you're WRONG you're actually RIGHT...

OH,I see, SILLY ME...

If you would like to produce even ONE VALID study to support any ONE of these insane "theories" of yours, perhaps people might actually take you and your argument, SERIOUSLY....

Until then, I can only stand back and watch you throw the equivalent of an adult temper tantrum in a public forum...


Then you keep derailing, ad homing even more until the initial topic is too screwed up to continue with everyone thinking clearly.


The ACTUAL term is "ad hominem" and as for the TOPIC, you yourself derailed that a LONG time back,with this misogynistic RANT of yours....

A debate actually requires at least SOME proof of the claims that are made, it is NOT just a one-sided rant from an unwell individual with an axe to grind...based on his OWN warped view of the topic at hand...

As for "being like zombies that keep coming back....", yes it really DOES seem that you are unable to accept that ALL the women on here think you are warped, and even the majority of MEN are arguing with you about your ridiculous views...
But you just KEEP COMING BACK.....
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