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 Solkin
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 376
Can men and women be friends without sex?Page 16 of 53    (13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53)
Yes! We Can...

One of my best friends in highschool was female, and we had a very good "friend" relationship. Still do for that matter. I even went out with her best friend, and not once did anything escalate between us, to the point of being anything other than just friends. She is now married and has 3 kids, and we are still great friends to this day.

Those who say it can't be done, need to grow up, plain and simple.
 fishe
Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 377
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/29/2006 11:27:02 PM
Yes.... even after the sex, some hurt and some pain... if there's still respect there can be a friendship and a good supportive one at that. Not in all cases but if you've ever experienced it... it is the best of all friends.
 queenrhiannon
Joined: 8/15/2005
Msg: 378
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 12:22:03 AM
qoute: Those who say it can't be done, need to grow up, plain and simple.

Bravo.

To those that have wonderful friendships with the opposite sex and have for years (I have male friends for over 15 years) - with no hanky panky - and actually respect eachother - bravo.
Its no point in arguing with people who think it cannot be done. Maybe all they think about is sex and that is the most important in any realtionship - don't know. But I never ever have thought about sleeping with my male friends. Even had a few crash on my couch when we were drunk - so the alcohol excuse is proved wrong.

so this thread has been going on way too long -and probly will keep going on - might make a record on pof. Another one of those agree to disagree threads.

(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about)
 Bookworm70
Joined: 11/14/2004
Msg: 379
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 3:31:43 AM

(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about)

When you say that things "are never the same", aren't you doing the same thing as those people who say that men and women can't be just friends? You've come to a conclusion based on your own experience. But this thread is full of men and women who, based on their experience, are saying that it is impossible to not have sex put strain on the relationship.

And just to be clear, I think it is possible. I just think it's a lot more complicated than a lot of women want to think it is. If I had a nickel for every "brother" who secretly wanted more, or for every girl who later on developed feelings for a "brother" when her own relationship got dysfunctional.... I'd have a lot of nickels.
 Bookworm70
Joined: 11/14/2004
Msg: 380
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 3:32:29 AM

(BTW - after sex- doesn't make you friends anymore - its ex lovers. There is a boundary and once you step over it - things are never ever the same - no matter how both parties pretend it to be - been there - done that - know what I am talking about)

When you say that things "are never the same", aren't you doing the same thing as those people who say that men and women can't be just friends? You've come to a conclusion based on your own experience. But this thread is full of men and women who, based on their experience, are saying that it is impossible to not have sex put strain on the relationship.

And just to be clear, I think it is possible. I just think it's a lot more complicated than a lot of women want to think it is. If I had a nickel for every "brother" who secretly wanted more, or for every girl who later on developed feelings for a "brother" when her own relationship got dysfunctional.... I'd have a lot of nickels.
 blueiss2
Joined: 2/28/2006
Msg: 381
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 4:24:04 AM
It,s funny, but it,s my older son,s say a man and women cant be friends with out sex. Mabey they can,t , and mabey when I was their age I didnt think that either, but now being at this age , that I am I know it,s possiable. Sex is not the most important part of making a relationship, mabey in keeping it when it gets even to that point but in the begining I love to tell them They are wrong. Lisa
 REXDALE
Joined: 6/28/2006
Msg: 382
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 6/30/2006 1:04:10 PM
Sure. I have all kinds of male friends and I only sleep with one of them. He's not my 'boyfriend' -- he's a friend that's a boy who I sleep with.

Some I just toke with. Others I talk to. Whatever.

When any of the ones I'm not sleeping with hook up with a girl and was she to feel uncomfortable about me I'd step aside and smoke or talk to somebody else.

That part is easy for me. It's when I actually have to get a boyfriend myself and I start getting feelings for them that I start acting messed up.

Everyone says I should learn to play the game -- play my cards right etc. Problem is that my male friends and I wouldn't have any fun then because we enjoy laughing our asses off at the women who think they won.

Sometimes I wish I was a boy. It would be so much easier. I wouldn't have to explain how I believe getting down on my knees is pretty darn affectionate and then stand by and watch while the guys who said they didn't want a relationship run off within 6 months and play married with children.

Well, maybe I would. But maybe I'd feel bad about it.
 Orion-2
Joined: 7/1/2006
Msg: 383
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/2/2006 10:04:32 AM
It's totally possible, but it's up to the guy to seriously decide he dosent want to try to push the relationship in that direction.

There's also something to be said for attraction. if you don't find them phsyically attractive it's hard to want to have sex. You know w female who's such a great person you can talk to them until 3 in the morning but if you don't want to have sex with them you just don't.
 JodyLL
Joined: 7/28/2005
Msg: 384
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/2/2006 3:42:33 PM
Yes. It takes a girl that doesn't what to have sex with the guy and guy that can handle that. I have a female roomate she's hott. She doesn't want to have sex with me and that's fine. If I was an ass hole we wouldn't be friends and if wanted to have sex with me we wouldn't be friends. So, that the mixture I think it takes.
 Soul Seductive
Joined: 6/5/2005
Msg: 385
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 6:54:00 AM
Of course they can..most of my friends are females..I didnt "buck" any of them....though the thought may have crossed my mind sometimes.....good thing I didnt move back north...oh boy!
 hendrix_rules
Joined: 6/18/2006
Msg: 386
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 7:14:42 AM
sure they can... isnt that what a friendship is?
 YourThrone
Joined: 7/3/2006
Msg: 387
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 7:28:38 AM
Well, instead of reading through 500 plus posts lol I'm sure somebody said this.I don't think women and men can be just friends.In my case personally every woman I tried to be friends with tried at some point wanted to become more than just friends with me. Unless it was just the physical attraction to me but, my personal experiences proved It's hard just being friends.
 Titian
Joined: 6/23/2006
Msg: 388
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 8:02:03 AM
WELL MOST OF MY FRIENDS ARE MALE AND I HAVENT SLEPT WITH THEM SO ID SAY YES TO THIS...WE HANG OUT AT KARAOKE AND GO DANCING....AND IF THEY ARE ATTRACTED TO ME.....THEY SURE ARENT LETTING ME KNOW ABOUT IT ...
 cracked_jar
Joined: 7/3/2006
Msg: 389
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 2:41:06 PM
in deed they can. my best friend is a women and we have known each other for 15 years. so yet it is possible.
 sddude
Joined: 11/4/2004
Msg: 390
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 4:22:30 PM
Yes yes yes,

I live with two 21 year olds and we sleep in the same king size bed , so far after a year , no sex .


MMM just cannot convince them , one day they will get around , Lucy and Karely mmmm and me , what a fantasy and still be friends , hehehehehe
 onceloved
Joined: 7/1/2006
Msg: 391
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/3/2006 5:27:15 PM
I have been hanging out with this lady friend for about 4 years now and sex isnt even a consideration. We have a close relationship perhaps built more on dependancy than anything. We are both alone in life and sort of look out for each other. I take her shopping and to doctor appointments and she washes my vegetables and makes me wonderful salads. We sort of do for each other like close friends would do. On the other hand, with all the $ I have spent on her over the past few years I probably SHOULD get some physical compensation. seriously though, she has enough $ to buy me out ten times over and I still enjoy buying her things just to see the surprise of joy in her face. Sex and money and just about anything else will not stand in the way of true friendship.
 albinobutterfly
Joined: 4/30/2006
Msg: 392
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/4/2006 5:16:27 PM
well i think it is doing able

men and women can be friends and not have sex but that chance is always there i suppose.

i would hope men and women can be friend without sex buit most men want the whole friends with benefits thing and that is dangerous n wrong
 Prudance
Joined: 6/11/2006
Msg: 393
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/4/2006 5:41:34 PM
Definately!, its seems evident that 75% of society expects you to have no friends of the oposite sex!, I personaly feel it is not good to descriminate!. Do I want to jump into bed with my friends? .. NO! I am sure a lot of peoples minds are in overdrive,....should I care NO!..... Be true to yourself and up front with your friends, and why should people always think sex is involved......you must have friends you don''t want to leap in to bed with right!, its not as if we are all on heat?...Trust your intuition....
 seeking_a_dream_girl
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 394
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/6/2006 10:33:40 AM
Fools!! all of them.. lol you are too beautiful to be unassailled by at least some well directed flirting. If I was your friend I would be wanting to advance to lover status, to be sure. lol
 katie19
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 395
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/6/2006 10:34:56 AM
All about trust and communication. I trust my bf so i would let him go out with any girls he wanted.
 Catwm
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 396
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/6/2006 10:41:54 AM
Been there, done that and yes it happens every day.
 GreenEyesFlashing
Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 397
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/7/2006 1:34:51 PM
Yes, I think men and women can be friends without sex....but if you are married, I just don't know where to draw the line. I was married for 10 years, and my husband was one who had more women friends than guy friends. Anyway, I, being the trusting wife, believed every word he said about his "friends". Little did I know that he was having sex with at least two of his "friends". Even when I was called up on the phone, being told by an annonymous caller that he was cheating on me, I did not believe this person. I believed and trusted my husband. So, I think if I were married again, I would prefer his friends becoming my friends also, or he sever the friendship. Seeing women friends without my being present would be a no no from now on.
 Beachtime00
Joined: 7/8/2006
Msg: 398
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/8/2006 10:29:25 AM
My best friend of the opposite sex just died three weeks ago. He would of jumped my bones if I had led him on. He was very attracted to me but we NEVER exchanged spit, touched, or had sex in any shape or form. We were friends for over 25 years. The first thing I did when I met my ex boyfriend was I told him I had two male friends and invited him out with us. My male friend hid me from his girlfriend for quite a while and I had a problem with that but we became friends later. I was there for his two day wake and funeral. Went to his moms home and his gravesite with his family. I was not a threat to his girlfriend. I had a boundry, this invisible line that I would never cross. Hey men will be men and there Di s get hard. It's all about respect and the most powerful word in our language which is N O. I fell you can be friends with someone of the opposite six if only one is physical attracted to the other. We are human and I believe if two people are very sexually attacted to each other (both) and thrown together long enough something will happen. No booze, no drugs, never alone. But if only one is physically attracted then I have no problem. SOm e men can't be friends because they are all ablut the sex. I am 48 and my Best friend Steven Died June 14 this year. I have three other male friends. Not as close but you have to treat each other like brother and sister. No sexual teasing, flirting or touching and it can and has been done.................. Mis you Steven,,,,,,,,,,,,
 squidbite
Joined: 6/9/2006
Msg: 399
Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/8/2006 12:45:44 PM
NO!

Men and Women can not be friends because the SEX always gets in the way. If a man finds a woman attractive he will ALWAYS want to sleep with her. If he doesn't then he is lying or she is as attractive as Janet Reno to him. The whole movie "When Harry Met Sally" was based on that fact, and they were friends, but they still ended up having sex didn't they?

It does not matter if she says no, the fact that the man is a dog he will always want to sleep with her. Im sorry I just cant think of putting my teeth marks in a butt of a 'friend'. Go ahead and talk to this friend like you talk to a guy... Any guy who is not lying will tell you the same thing. Now if he does not find you attractive then of course he can be your friend. You have to remember that rule.

Aint going to happen. And you ever notice the women who say they have alot of male "friends" are always flirting around. They know the power they have, they can get any guy 'friend' to mow the lawn with a wink.

Oh and the big one I heard from some woman on here... He is my best friend he doesn't want sex... we only slept together once because he was my friend....

Yep I have a woman I know as a neighor that is also a 'friend"... I would jump on her in a minuite... she is a cutie!
 mrRL
Joined: 8/2/2005
Msg: 400
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Can men and women be friends without sex?
Posted: 7/8/2006 2:07:53 PM
definately men and women can be solely friends... if they don't find the other attractive. and i don't even mean ugly, cause ugly people have sex and i'm sure it's not necessarily with strangers. women: don't think that because you're a tomboy and/or have a ton of guy friends that they don't think down inside of having sex with you. i'm not saying that they're gonna get you drunk one nite and get in your pants or for that matter even initiate any type of act that would be constituted as "wrong" by you. but, hormonally and innately, straight men want to have sex with women. i have a bunch of female friends and i don't try to bone them but that doesn't mean it hasn't crossed my mind. i don't let my caveman instincts get the better of me. thanks to my mancestors for helping our species evolve.
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