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Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 326
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a place for us novices...Page 14 of 36    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36)
thank you dear autumn;
i'm trying my damndest
believe it or not
just sometimes
i gotsta get some of it out!

doing spring cleaning
all these windows
open so wide
letting sunlight inside

the cats are running about
happy and silly
they are making me laugh
stereo is turned loud
enough for even the
deaf to hear clearly
and i'm moving my a***
gettin stuff done
cause i'd rather be
at the pool
frolicking in this hot sun

not long from now
a friend with kids
might stop by
and those dears
will surely bring
joy laughter and smiles
to me as they always do

and i'll get a good dose
of their heartfelt hugs too
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 328
view profile
a place for us novices...
Posted: 3/19/2007 1:33:32 AM
spoke with a dear
long ago friend yesterday
had to track her down
through researching
quite a long time online
but found her brother
then her dad and finally her mother
and then yes a call to her cell phone
could hear the shock yeah
and happiness in her voice
and we laughed
and laughed
and laughed
some people you
can go years with
and pick right up
as if you hadn't been far

her husband
and mine back then
were attached
to the same destroyer
during desert shield
and desert storm
we shared a few tours
and a trip to asia
together she and i
to visit them halfway
through a deployment
we were close friends back then
we were tight and shared so much
like extended military families do
when living through uncertainties
such as we did brought us close together

i worked as a liaison for the military
the commodore of the 7th fleet in fact
what a wonderful man was he
always there for us
and whatever we
wanted or needed
while our spouses
were gone for so long

she became pregnant
and had her firstborn
now she has three teens
back then when
our men went out
into the vast oceans
doing their jobs
so far away from
our arms and their homes
but never far from our
hearts or our minds
we had damn cnn reminding us
24/7 and the phone
rang all the time
with worried wives
with worried parents
with worried family
with worried friends
with suicide calls
with military info

i was too busy
to think much
of my own worries
back then i juggled
single parenting
of a beautiful smart boy
he, the apple of my eye
made my heart swell
with so much pride
and with work of
helping others
glad to keep busy
busy busy

so long ago so far away
completely different lives
so many moves so many places
virginia florida scotland spain
back to san diego again
so many things experienced

we caught up pretty well
we gabbed and laughed
for close to an hour
both of our lives
very much changed

she now has three kinder
and a country house
with horses and equestrian
riding taking up time
her man has been
to iraq a few times
and he is indefinitely
on tour in another state
with rotation again mid east
like so many people now do
while things haven't changed
but they seem to sure do

while my own marriage
i took leave of twice since
but i still keep in touch
with my once soul mate
pretty often we still talk
and email even more

while my own stepson
is now all grown up
he's a doctor; imagine
working with autistic children
and he now is married
and has a beautiful baby girl
and my heart is glad for him
it sings when i think of him
and my heart cries in shame
when i think of him and having left

just now off the phone
with my ex who lives
in another country
land and oceans away
so many things remain
as they always will between us
funny how it's not just me
that thinks and feels this way

i told him what my friend
said just yesterday
because she surprised me
with "you two are so off the wall
no one else could ever understand
each other as well or as closely
as the two of you always could and
really always will, dontcha think?!"
he agreed, that surprised me too

but now i am consumed
with my own work and life
in this mine singular day to day
better understanding now
what i didn't back then
fully own or realize
still sometimes can't sleep
so i get up and read or post or play
then just as surely have a hard time
squinting at the alarm clock
groaning to myself as i get up
to shower and begin my new day
get to work early in hours away
speeding down the road which
will become a racetrack as it
will soon host the las vegas mini gran prix
so i'd better get off this machine
and stop with the reveries
well, for now anyway
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 329
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for a beautiful baby girl
Posted: 3/19/2007 1:55:46 AM
Enya ~ The Celts

Irish Gaelic
Hi-ri, Hi-ro, Hi-ri.
Hoireann is O, ha hi, ra ha, ra ho ra.
Hoireann is O, ha hi, ra ha, ra ha ra.
Hi-ri, Hi-ra, Hi-ri.

Saol na saol,
Tús go deireadh.
Tá muid beo
Go deo.

Saol na saol,
Tús go deireadh.
Tá muid beo
Go deo.

Hi-ri, Hi-ra, Hi-ri,
Hoireann is O, ho hi, ra ha, ra ha ra.


Life of lives,
Beginning to the end.
We are alive

Life of lives,
Beginning to the end.
We are alive

(Literally "life of lives", this really means "forever" or "world without end". It's also the conclusion of the Irish Gaelic version of the "Our Father" prayer.)
Joined: 10/6/2005
Msg: 331
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I once Walked...
Posted: 3/19/2007 10:04:20 PM
I once walked beneath the wind
And once swam the ocean blue
Sauntered down the crooked path
That led me to the world anew

I once took the closet path
Did nothing to change the world
The one in front, the easy way
And nothing came unfurled

But I live in wonderment
Of why things have not changed
Why it doesn’t matter what you do
And the world is never estranged

My heart it knows the better way
The path that will enlighten
That nothing comes easily
And one should never frighten

So with this wisdom
I walk beneath the wind
And swim the ocean blue
Saunter down the crooked path
That leads me to the world anew

Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 332
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free again and relieved
Posted: 3/23/2007 12:02:54 AM
i am indeed but a novice
in attempts to explain
whatever is within my me
it's more than just ok
i promise you it's all good
beautiful sister always dreaming
thank you for your conviction
thank you for your voice
thank you for your care
enveloping me

recently i am understanding
and revisiting my own convictions

exhausted with twisting
i tired from turning
and looking from all angles
my insides coming out
emotions swirling to surface
i can only just be me

literally slapped in the face
just only last night
never thought i'd ignore such
rest assured it's clear
sense in it's own unfolding way
has again made it's return

so i fell asleep and took a nap
today in that mri contraption
life whirling in so many directions
felled silent unmoving tears
grateful for the music soothing me
drowning out the loud metallic clacks
emitting from the huge machine

i got out and firmly planted my feet
and know i don't need darkness beside me
believe me when i say this
i don't need or want the artist anymore
not at all nope not for anything

now groggy from sleep
just awoke with a start
no dinner again tonight
last night i ate way too much

literally n figuratively
tenderloins grilled
broccoli n cheese
red baked potato
sugared and sweet

that new comfy couch
southern sweet tea
ice cream with chocolate bits
and fresh berries too
not enough to keep me now
and neither are you
the artistry no longer
mesmerizing me

i bid you now to find your
own future as it
surely ain't with me
'cause i am reminded of
what the bleep so we know?!
and the thompson twins
and your own lies lies lies

"lies lies lies yeah
they're gonna get you
lies lies lies yeah
they won't forget you
lies lies lies yeah
they're gonna get you
lies lies lies yeah
oh you know i know"

do you finally understand
these quantum physics
sad pretend replica of a man
i now see you so differently
than what i once did
today yeah thankfully clearly
this much is true
no longer having
of any need in any way
of the likes of someone
untruthful like you

monkey thrown off
finally from this back
as i await the spring sun
shining tomorrow in her glory
even as i'm praying for rain
but a shower will quite nicely do

for once i gotta just
be thankful and smile
not a slap and tickle
not a crowded house
no more a squeeze

that little slap to my face
brought me to my senses
in just the perfect way
realization fulfilled
you're no man to me

you don't even know
you can't even glean
this lost spent child
wasn't yours
thanking God again
that you were ignorant
not seeing the clues

pretending you're so kind
while you love to be cruel
rest assured a finger
of yours will
never again
never again
touch me

i make promises
to myself
and keep them easily

throwing no more
backward glances
when i walked out the door
leaving now both the beauty
and the ugliness of our past
firmly now where it belongs
not stuck in any patterns
i am free and singing
with the full breadth
of these fine lungs

just had to get this out finally
these feelings and thoughts into print
make them somehow more real
the load has been lifted as i heal

yes i am smiling
yes i am grateful
yes i am again free
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 333
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a place for us novices
Posted: 3/26/2007 7:16:25 PM
ahh but aren't we all
novices in something
or another?!

irritation at seeing
a holier than thou
larger than life
talking down
to an amazing
incredible soul
a dear friend
of the light
of much love
of warmth
and one who
has proved
their caring
and daring
an evolved one
with integrity
and with love
sharing openly

seeing it
makes me just sigh
and makes me realize
indeed no one is perfect
yet we are all perfect
in each our own ways

but one who
talking down to
others intentionally
must feel really
really small inside
and their own skin
i surmise they can
only be hurting
and not know how
to ask or seek help
or love or light
because instead
they must
even to themselves
appear to
always be right

or they wouldn't
need to attack
now would they?
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 334
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perceptions of reality based on clarity
Posted: 3/27/2007 12:09:11 AM
excuse me
mr uzi please
but i abhor
a handful
of things
racism being
an important one
to me you see

you might not
in this case
not encrypted
because merely
because truly
you simply can't

as of late recently
because nastiness
of the offending
post in question
you may glean
has now been
rightfully methinks
erased and deleted

yes i agree
perception is
truly indeed
subjective reality
but flaming
and racism
of any kind
won't don't
never will
jive with me

i don't need
the last word
nor the first
as you'd believe
but i will always
defend those here
of many dear
i know share
of themselves
something special
love truth integrity
laughter tears reality
life has many blessings

yeah even if sometimes
my taste buds are indeed
perhaps in some tin foil
kinda type of conspiracy
'cause i can always choose
to spit out that offending me
in this case ugliness
toward another unprovoked
sure did get my goat
had me pretty smoked
so i chose not to be
incredulous but instead
proactive with my heart
they know i understand
and that's what matters
to them and me

please let not my journey
however far it's winding or stuck
cause you undue pause
as it doesn't depend
on any other's thinking

or my simple struggling
in this human condition
but rather if or how
i gauge myself
whether i choose to ignore
or openly clearly abhor
when kindred are
targets of others
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 335
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love sent from afar
Posted: 3/28/2007 6:07:30 AM
stealin, that was really beautiful,
thank you for sharing it herein

spirit you know i thank you
for helping me on this way
i want to let you know i too
hold you and yours in my heart today
gain strength and health back soonest
you are a both a conduit of love
and grace of messages i send you too
for you darling woman, are dearly loved

an angel among us needing
solace and strength of will
our dear friend cyn has taken ill
blessings love and light to her
she has but more is always welcome
to overcome anything with love
no matter our beliefs we have all felt
moving deep intangible miracle of love
energy within and swirling around
in highest skies and deepest sacred ground
i say my simple words

the power of so many good wishes
could never go unheeded
the prayers and love sent out
for her from and of so many
today is a trying day to remain steady

we await the good news as we too
must go about our day but i do
sincerely hope she feels us
even if far it seems we're away
we're all right there close inside
as she is in ours, we are in her heart
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 336
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Posted: 4/6/2007 12:16:01 AM
intuition reawakening
from ensuing onslaught
chaos of world birthing self
as if through chards of glass
comes now this flirtatious spring
bringing gifts for all bestowed
soaring with few regrets
heart's whispered empathies
thankfully adaptation flows
through within our very souls

alert awake aware now sighing
this night too transforming itself
into tomorrow leaving today
perfectly into it's very wake
ying yang perfect life's circle
life splashing back onto self
like pieces of those we've all lost
becoming parts of ourselves
never to be forgotten but
instead held tightly within hearts

no longer necessary
any treading of storms
north shore's undertow
current ages old give way
crescendos of waves
blend unto terra firma
soft sand felt underfoot
toe's and mind's fetish too
perfect mingling of both
gentle softness and strength

this struggling land
beneath each of our feet
still gracious is she despite
or in spite whilst wearing her grand age
yet continuum of giving
deserving oh so much more
than we avow unto her
this like any other relationship
tells more than shame inside
it's one from which we cannot hide
from our own soul's depth of self

at very least we can acknowledge her
with the tender care and grace
she herself has so freely given
a present adorned for each of us
wrapped more beautifully
than we could ever imagine
live each day in respect
dropping cloaks of hatred
in hearkened song's
strumming fresh spring

go out and seek this gift
reawakening ourselves
love is the simplest of gifts
piece of fruit held forward
growing smile from within
shared brought out toward
trust of each emergence
into one same realm shared

this beautiful land is ours
nurture and respect her
for she is a loving mother
deserving our protection
her waters and mountains
crags and bogs and all
graceful dancing meadows
to singing desert plateaus
her gentle wind's kisses
sweeping our faces
who amongst us has not
felt her sweet embrace?

enlightened emerging
revolution of evolution
singular wheel rolling
synchronicity again unfolding

laws of attraction
meant to be reshaped
to grow to learn to teach
never to preach nor beseech
don't forsake whispers
unfolded onto your heart
when felt or spoken to
we cannot remain untouched
unless we feel we must
but i cannot will not ignore
this bountiful passion's harvest

breaking through molds
tearing down bit by bit
gnashing through castle's
craggy cold grey stones
behind the highest gates
be they natural or man made
hear lushest gardens call to us
triumph reigns refreshed
once again made new and whole
nature calls with singing
birds sweetly trilling

no situation set in stone
nor beyond saturation
changing hues or edification
life may be for some fragile
for others but known strength

availing selves openly
honestly tenderly
we see we feel we sigh
looking upwards always
searching horizon's skies
scanning for softest souls

seeking touch familiar
vintage curve soul scent
smiling sweetly wine kissed lips
take for granted not this
our glorious gift of sun
reflected in kodachrome eye
warmth awashed free from within
even that of the whirling dervish

angels of mercy angels of healing
chorus of enormity
assailing senses primordially
invitations cradling faces
the simple caress is no mistake

magical sensuous violin
weeping joyous tears
most tender release comes
with decided rejuvenation
creation of principled
rationale of cultural strength
new journey unfolds
within our familiar skin
whenever we choose
indeed yes it is a choice
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 337
view profile
Posted: 4/8/2007 4:51:46 PM
tangled thoughts
flowing mnemonic
reveries of memory
scent and touch
senses reeling
in simpatico rhythm
my sighs still feeling
your warm kind eyes
your gentle touch
your easy laughter
your beatific smile

warm water cleansing
an epiphany each time
luxurious wafting
soaking together divine
baptismal of senses
always welcome
familiar trusted you

talk laugh eat
joke play sleep
wake a few times
during dark of night
and day's new dawn
to take the other
crescendo duality
of physical sensuality

during those the
cool breezes
belonging to us
and the millipedes
wanting to
share space
as if they envy us

sable and jake
doing their best
to police us and
keep us safe
from those other
slinky creatures

off to the races
after a few calls
some not good news
worrying pushed aside
made way for the event
of today a different
kind of way
to spend Easter sunday
i thank you again
and again and yes again

walls bouncing off
each other quiet now
windows open
more breezes
caress my silent face
as i sit here recalling
your sweet embrace
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 338
view profile
right now in this very moment
Posted: 4/24/2007 7:53:01 PM
oooh the simpatico lovers cosmic
venus oozing her scent and sensuality
hedonistic beautiful simplistic pleasures
mars masculine counterpart face as yet
untouched untraced unseen
matters not i know contentedly
for life splays at her own timing

mother earth beckons me
no rather, in fact she demands
attention of my entire full being
and i bid her attention gratefully
and yes oh yes please, gracefully
out of concrete back to nature
to feel whole and full and right
just around this next corner of my life

to sit in fields and drink in views
of long ago wandered terrain
vast beauty in all directions
scents of wonder make me smile
and yet i am not even yet there
but in the knowing i am happy
in this knowing i veritably glow
my soul took longer to reawaken
to this the second spring since
the passing of my birth mother
i feel her presence and joy
i am comforted knowing this
plan is better than just simply good
a handful of people know my deepest me
and that is good and just and fair
but a journey awaits my feet
my toes will be so happy in red clay

desirous of action and pro action
potential sparking fires
stoking glowing embers
mercurial sun moon aspects
spinning in perfectly timed rhythm
evoking chemistry mercurial liaison
reverie dream fabric weaving spring
generating potential totality of reality

beauty nature jagged and smooth
soothing sedona and her red rocks
here come i soonest with promise
with hope in my heart in my pockets
in my hair as the wind in my dreams
i have quite the lush fantasy realm
all swirling in this mine 'ittle head
camera paints writing journal await
my heart skips beating in anticipation
i wanna go i wanna go i wanna go!

another oh so long awaited road trip
hearing feeling sensing touching
that call which beckons me yearly
i bite my lips to keep from smiling widely
heat from deep within my pelvis spins
twirling laughing and dancing happily
anticipation, this desire is solely mine
contentment as i hear and surrender
to this another one of my callings
electricity tingles zapping my thoughts

the warmth is mine i cradle and cherish it
i sigh breathing of strawberries flows out
i inhale and smell citrus i am i am i am
so very much more than merely alive
enveloped in this, the dusk of beginning
another beautiful evening scented with melodies
of the happiest birds i've heard yet this season
of promise, they sing for me now now now
right this very beautiful moment i tell you
right outside my southerly wide open window
751pm 24.4.07 a time to record for future reverie
 escaping life
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 339
Posted: 4/25/2007 8:47:27 AM
Take a stroll down memory lane
Remember the good,
Remember the bad.
Use the good to soften the bad.
Use the bad as an anchor during rough seas.
Allow the good to remind you of happy times,
And let them soften the ache of the bad.
Let the bad keep you grounded,
And remind you that you are strong.
Let the good be like a soft pillow,
That you can sink into at night.
Let the bad be your courage to overcome,
The rock you can lean on when feeling overwhelmed.
Let the memories,
Both good and bad,
Help you along the rocky road we must travel.
Each play a purpose,
No matter how painful,
No matter how joyful,
Each memory will guide us.
Each memory is a stepping stone
To better times,
To harder times.
But hang tight to you anchor.
Take that stroll down memory lane,
And remember what has passed,
What you have conquered,
What you have enjoyed.
Remember the trials,
Remember the rewards.
Remember who you are.
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 340
view profile
a place for us novices...
Posted: 4/25/2007 7:17:08 PM
ohh yes autumn
so clearly a dear
happy, content, even
yes hopeful too
you know me so well
i thank you for visiting
weaving your magic
unfolding yourself
for all to experience
you are such a very dear!

is it spring enchanting me
or that cup of green tea
or perhaps just me finally
returning to a part of me?!
love is indeed the air
love is every and anywhere
if but we can learn
to still ourselves to be able
to catch it's drifting scent
and inhale deeply

to seek it instead of
withdrawal or isolation
a sort of hedonistic libation
to drink and partake in fully
for each of us that dare to
dream and hope and live

escaping life, i too thank you
i am humbled by your words
i remember you because you
remind me of my favorite niece
how i pray and hope one day
she could find herself more
like yourself and not astray
you bring brightness today
as stars twinkle in the sky
your last visit 12.11.06
i had to sleuth but was again
reminded of your kindred soul
brought here from within

you are very wise and talented
to know of the importance
of anchors and memories
both good and bad that make
you you and me me
and everyone themselves
to remember who we are
we have inside our very souls
the ability to turn our dreams
into future reality and destiny

even if that sometimes means
pulling deep within ourselves
daring to share with others
evolved living even if by braille
by mnemonic memories of past
imprinted onto each our souls vast
tracing origins from ancient places
of far away times and far away spaces
i can only hope to read more
of your finely written lines
please feel free to visit anytime

a surprise from eagle too~
"short and to the point"
but oh so hit the mark
sometimes i wish i weren't
so damn wordy... but
then i remember...
i wouldn't be me!
and right now i am glad
very glad that you are you
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 341
view profile
a place for us novices...
Posted: 4/29/2007 9:06:34 PM
this weekend flew by so fast
almost hard to believe
it's firmly now in the past

friday night was so hot
sadly our plans went astray
with the jacuzzi gate
affixed with chain & lock
i'm sure we'll remember
next time to just go earlier
back for some limey drinks
a few games of chess and freely
i admit my mind was elsewhere
yes i lost both but i won't mope
still remember i owe the bet
i plan to make good my debt

the birds chirped so happily
singing away their and our hours
seemingly for just you n me
making us laugh frequently
poor little sable with her sniffles
and fat adorable jake finally well
again they both like watching us
while flicking lazily their tails
again they reminded me someone
of last year that attacked
my silly lines about sex
with both cats watching curiously
that made us both laugh heartily

still such fun was yet to be had
and had it was indeed my soul free
i am even a bit surprised at myself
with my hungry and craving needs
satiated so well and soaring so high
counting never no not even
once entered into my mind
as my body seemed to float
as if into higher layers of sky

somehow saturday became
the hottest day thus far
and nope not just the weather
happy to wake next to you
you liked how i showed you too
damn we surprised each other
marathon~esque good stuff yum
night time found us in your car
to bronze together was such fun
now really sorry cringing here
recalling how i opened the door
when the attendant knocked
as you stood tall and naked, adonis
while i had my fluffy towel cover
funny she seemed to not wanna leave...
blotting and rubbing ya down was fun
you worried about orange hues
but we came out looking sunned

then to eat at a new greek cafe
that stuff really was great, eh
came several calls from my cell
tinkling out it's chiming melody
it just kept ringing but good thing
it made us scurry to get our wristbands
for the concert we rushed around

back to my place to get dressed
you had a shirt needing pressed
i had to try on two different skirts
and you politely encouraged me
to wear something not so nipply
back for the show but that place
so damn packed off we went looking
found a space with a lit up cool onyx counter
pomegranate tinis for me mojitos for you
the bartender liked us & made em strong
hard to believe he and i were born
in the same hospital; kinda freaky
but made for good laughs then came
some friends and their friends joined
talking till we closed down the place

stopped for steak breakfasts then home
i sleepily passed out 'n slept like a baby
awoke to such lovely more floating
now after such a great time; greedy me
my nose missing your scent
my face missing your chest
my ass so missing your hands
my tits missing your apt attention
my face and hair missing your caress
my hands missing touching every inch
my full lips missing your kisses
my mouth missing it's adored target
was this just a reverie or another fantasy?
so thankful that a girl can still dream!
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 342
view profile
a place for us novices...
Posted: 4/30/2007 5:32:43 PM
oh ad, sister dear
it is apparently so clear
we are of similar minds
hearts and dreams
goals and yes even
squeals and screams

back to reality
indeed i know you
and you know me
sisters though separated
by land and seas

my intention is
never was even
to hook anyone
or i'd surely be sinkin
into some kinda
stinkin thinkin

you make me smile
you make me think
your words your heart
like mine herein
our lines displayed
i care not if anyone
chooses to be dismayed
for you are you
and i am me
here we swim
playing in the fray
the flotsam and jetsam
within waves of our lives

i cannot fathom
nor suggest any bait
excepting to tell you
be patient dear sis
methinks he will be
so very worth your wait
somehow he can't be
in the past of your wake
but he's firmly in your future
perfectly so~ can't you just
feel that deep inside
yourself and truly know?

he, the special one
destined to be yours
surely will instantly recognize
beautiful you that's true blue
then you'll be the one
he'll be desiring true
fact or fiction it's your choice
your mind and heart are powerful
just be yourself an intricate woman
patient lovely kind and daring
keep feeling, dreaming sharing yourself
you aren't a forgotten doll
placed on highest shelf
you're a thinker a dreamer
so methinks surely meantime you've
many interesting and edifying
fascinating life things to do

no fair putting life on hold
waiting for magic to unfold
enjoy being you and living
your beautiful life
find the simplest things
that make you smile and sing
your heart will in it's time
be again happily spinning
and psst, ya know what~hey
there's always fine french lingerie
a little secret all for yourself
decadent and so well made
of fine silk and lace and tiny stitches
well, just 'cause you never know...
until it happens and then you
find yourself again with that
certain special glow
if that ain't bait, well then
dearest sister, i really dunno
Joined: 10/6/2005
Msg: 343
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a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/4/2007 9:26:24 PM
I’ve been thinking lately of your place
The desert side bar and its gentle pace
Wishing for the beauty of the night skies
Talking for awhile looking into your eyes
Tasting the drinks, cooling the night
Sharing with you all of the days delights
Releasing the tension of days gone by
Talking of life and maybe sharing some pie
I’ve been wondering if all is in you life is fair
Free from hate and all of its despair
Hoping you find your beautiful dream
Free from pain and full of esteem
That all of your torments are cleared away
And that you have a beautiful day.
Joined: 12/13/2006
Msg: 344
a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/4/2007 10:22:57 PM
Hoping you find your beautiful dream
Free from pain and full of esteem
That all of your torments are cleared away
And that you have a beautiful day.

What a nice thought.....

This feels right!


Chilling Words

I'm speaking to you
yes you, my words
not getting through
where is my baby
you are saying nothing
why don't you speak
you are frightened maybe
a simple question
I am not meek
someone spoke
behind me
but I did not hear
as if fluid pooling
in my ear
a needle in my arm
so I don't feel your words
wounding words
words that will harm
not bitter or thoughtless
but you know
as a blade is sharp
cutting slowly
through my heart
I see in your eyes
to speak
you are terrified

What? I am tied down
the man behind me
the one with a frown
holding me too tight
I'm not gonna fight!
I asked you a question!!!
F#CK! What's the matter,
Oh.... you are speaking....
You're so sorry?
There was nothing
you could do.................


the man behind me
the Dr. he's nodding yes

Ahh he nodded yes
to shoot me up
my arm is warm
you thought
I might explode...
Those words were powerful
like a flood
they are collecting
in my blood
no mere fluid
in my vain
will take them away
those which will cause
a lifetime of pain.

Did you answer me?
Where is my baby girl
it's her birthday.......
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 345
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a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/6/2007 7:51:45 PM
triple, so sweet to see
your return herein
thank you for your lines
always nice to read you

all is well as well can be
right now today for me
had a great weekend
and work's going well
getting through
my physical therapy
which hopefully ends soon

haven't been on PoF
so much lately
and when i have my pc
has been acting strangely
fixing gliches here n there
having fun and loving spring
just enjoying everything

getting ready for a trip
next weekend and things
to do talking with friends
how's your beauty mon ami &
so how the heck are you?

lonna too i must thank you
powerful feeling write
you left here for us
words cannot begin to measure
the images your writing wrought
blessing love and light to you
somehow faith will pull you through
i know it seems surreal
that many here can only begin
to imagine the pain and hell
you've been through
every parent understands
and childless folks can relate too
i hope soon sunshine returns
to your heart and memories
can work to restore your heart
nothing i can say or do
could possibly herein comfort you
i thank you for daring to leave
here some of your pain
so you can somehow in any
small way begin to feel restored again
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 346
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a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/7/2007 12:31:51 AM
autumn dear always so sweet
you are always uplifting us all
one by one so we don't fall
thank you yet again
a hundred times over
for your kindness extended
each time you appear here
you, beautiful sister
lover of all and such a
poetess of master kind

i haven't been on much lately
and have been meaning to post
in your thread with a few
half thought out ideas
still streaming round in
my head i'm so bad now
i ought to be in bed
but i promise soon to
visit meanwhile i'm hoping
all with you is better
than just fine and swell
you deserve everything
so much richer and better
than just ok or being well

you have always been
such a tender soul
i'm grateful we can choose
our friends, because you
dearest autumn are one of mine
you yes you simply radiate
you glow and you SHINE
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 347
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a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/8/2007 10:45:30 AM
ahh so often it's the eyes
that stab us directly into
the heart, making it almost
impossible to bear to be apart
so glad the silky boy was
taken into your home and
given love i know surely he
received from you
and all your kiddy kids too
so nice to see you visit again
wondering how you've been!
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 348
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a place for us novices...
Posted: 5/9/2007 7:13:39 PM
thank YOU for your kindness
always extended no matter what
glad too, to have shared email today
knowing better things soon to be
coming your way
yes, sometimes it's hard
to see through the muck
and count our blessings
without staying
stuck in our muck
but you always
have such kindness
in your heart sharing
boldly and deeply daring
thank you for your kindness
and sweet ways
know i'll keep you n yours
in my prayers
chin up darlin
business as usual
better times ahead!
remember the secret
strive to attain
your heart's desire
again one day surely
you'll be over the moon
just take care of yourself
and the kids and now a new
silky member of your family
you're right to know
we all each of us
have much to be
thankful for
wise you
take care
i've missed you too!
Joined: 10/6/2005
Msg: 349
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Posted: 5/10/2007 9:12:24 PM
A stolen heart from long ago
Taken away, why I’ll never know
Leaving a debt I can never repay
Leaving memories in my mind to sway
I missed all the firsts throughout the years
Scraped knees, kisses and all her tears
Holding her tight when she really ached
Her gentle smile when she would wake
The bedtime stories and tender times
And the tree out front that she climbs
I always thought I would see her soon
We sit and talk and be attune
One year turned five and then to ten
Ten to fifteen then wondering again
Will she ever understand
That this was never really planned
That I tried to do what I thought was right
I didn’t want her to see us fight
So asked her mother for just one thing
Just one promise and what it would bring
Pictures of her to watch her grow
So I could see her smile and always know
That she is happy and carefree
But that promise was broken to me
Seventeen years have past and she’s soon of age
I hope we can meet and start a new page
But I’m ready if she wants to hate me so
But I hope she asks so she will know
That I’ve carried her from right the start
In the middle of this empty heart

Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 350
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Posted: 5/10/2007 9:29:12 PM
triple oh please dear
please don't fear
she can't she won't
turn her back to you
all you have to do
is let her read
all these your gifts
your feelings of love
and surely she'll know
her love will grow
of yours shown
and extended

you must feel this
as i realize the guilt
of all you never did
was never your fault
as sure as each cherry
has it's pith
still it is an amazing
thing all on it's own
simple standing

because it doesn't
strive to be anything
it just isn't
i know it's just a matter
of time and place
ok maybe now some space
but your lives will again
you can bet on that
surely as the sun will again rise
your love has never died
nor has hers one day you'll see
and feel the reality
of her arms around her daddy
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