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 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 114
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?Page 3 of 33    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33)

WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?

They're much more interesting and a great way to escape the reality of having sold your soul to the devil
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 115
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/14/2005 4:44:28 PM
Seriously, I'd dump a woman if she tried to come between me and my PS2.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 119
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/15/2005 5:30:37 AM

because boys play video games
men do stuff that matters

I suppose playing a guitar "matters."

Listen, everyone has their hobbies whether it's painting, writing, watching TV, fishing, hunting, reading or playing video games, we all need our escape mechanism. To have such a narrow definition of manhood must be so rewarding.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 120
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/15/2005 6:18:39 AM
So, what your saying is, you have no useless activities in your life? You don't watch TV or movies or read fiction, watch sports - nothing like that? How about posting to an Internet forum? That's a pretty useless expenditure of time.

Oh, and by the way, if you purchase and play video games, you are supporting a multi-billion dollar industry that employs millions and keeps people from living in poverty ... I mean, really, we can do this with anything. Alcoholics keep employees of liquor stores, distributors and manufacturers working. Drug addicts help their dealers buy baby a new pair of shoes. So, everything is useful in some way. All I'm saying is your response is very narrow-minded. Some people enjoy that as an escape. It's better than dropping acid, for instance. And certainly not all "boys" who play video games have no other activities in their lives. Some of us actually do have rather extensive wood shops
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 121
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/15/2005 6:41:26 AM
ok, so I play video games for maybe an hour a week. Big deal. But if it came down to choosing, I'm not going to allow someone to dictate my life. If she's asking you to choose, she needs to go. Find someone who fits you.

See, like I said, there's a way to find positives in anything. A murderer keeps cops and jailers employed. And what happens if you find a woman who likes to play video games? They do exist. What a match that would be, huh?

You're still being narrow minded on this subject. I mean, c'mon, if a woman doesn't like the fact that the man she is with plays video games - and that becomes an actual issue - she needs to get out of the relationship.

Of course, though, I'm of the belief that men spend too much time concetrating on how they will find the next woman rather than just living their own life and making themselves happy. Making a woman happy at your own expense and sacrifice is just a ticket to a life of misery. If you like playing video games, play video games. If you like playing a guitar, do it.

By the way, unless you're playing your guitar at Live Aid or some similar function, then it is just as much a waste of time as playing video games.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 125
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/15/2005 7:15:08 AM
playing an instrument is cumulative

Agreed. But you're discarding video games as being worthless. Not everyone plays Grand Theft Auto. Hell, I've never even seen the game. I stick to strategy games that challenge the mind and are cumulative learning processes. It may sound odd, but the first learning experiences for all animals are considered "play." There is value. Games like chess involve great mental challenges. Even a game like Tetris teaches and facilitates problem-solving skills. Now, is that a waste of time?

Here's also where there is separation - your guitar is not a hobby, it's your livlihood. I write for a living. I write in my spare time, too. What I write won't always see the light of day or profit me directly, but it sharpens my skills, makes me a better writer and helps me earn money. But a lot of what I write in my spare time is experimental crap that is really a waste of time, but I enjoy it.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 129
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 9/15/2005 10:27:15 AM
Jimtex ... a real man doesn't put up with someone dictating how he will live his life. My biggest point in this whole debate is, whether it's video games, crack, volunteering, playing guitar ... whatever it may be, if the person you are with expects you to change your behavior, you're better off without that person. Either you accept the person for who he/she is, or it's not going to work. And, yes, there is down time in anything. Your partner needs to respect that. Man, if you're always on in a relationship ... gah ... when do you get to be you? No wonder I stay single.


@guitarman ... those are hardly "obscure" references. Pointing out that animals learn through play doesn't seem obscure. Of course, you're probably also of the opinion that playing sports is worthless ... *sigh*
 and_your_point_is
Joined: 1/17/2006
Msg: 133
WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?
Posted: 1/25/2006 7:18:01 AM
What alot of people fail to understand is that gaming is a hobby like any other. And that if you've been working on a certain part of it for awhile, you can't just stop what you're doing and pick up later. Non-gamers (male or female) don't understand the concept of finding a good save point for your game that you've been working on for awhile. Or that you need to concentrate on some complex games that require you to read or listen to the background to avoid being killed, etc. (Thats why we don't wanna listen this very second) Its an escapism.

Yeah I know, poor baby, but its a hobby like quilting or cooking. You don't just stop in the middle of a recipe or it gets ruined, you have to find a good stopping point. And like any hobby its relaxing.

I do agree at some point it becomes addiction and can hurt a relationship, but casual playing shouldn't be any different than watching a ball game or anything else us horrible males do.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 134
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WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?
Posted: 1/25/2006 7:24:27 AM
People get down on video games like they’re some kind of evil thing. But a funny thing has happened: mounds of research is showing that moderate to avid video game playing is an intellectual stimulant. It increases an individual’s ability to make quick decisions, reacting to adversity in definitive and positive ways. What spurred these studies? The ability of those in generation X and Y to consistently outperform their older counterparts in intellectual exercises.

And yes, I'd dump a chick who said "It's either me or the game."
 and_your_point_is
Joined: 1/17/2006
Msg: 135
WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?
Posted: 1/25/2006 7:27:53 AM
Well its also proven to help hand-eye coordination and in some cases can teach you about historical facts. I actually learned some stuff about ancient and recent history from playing games like Total War and Blitzkreig. The makers of the games use real historical places, people and base everything as close to the real thing as they can. And they give you little historical facts and what happened in real life at that time. So it can be educational at times.
 Riggity
Joined: 3/17/2004
Msg: 140
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 1/25/2006 7:51:31 PM
now here's a crack squad of motivated POF personell
 HarleyMark
Joined: 4/3/2005
Msg: 141
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 1/29/2006 9:42:24 AM
I USED to play games a lot when I was younger, though I never missed school/work or neglected any chores. Now I am actually getting pretty bored with gaming and find it hard to sit a play for any length of time. I only play about four or five hours a WEEK, if at all. Whenever gf comes into my life (it will happen someday...) gaming will get knocked down even lower on my "things to do" list.

It is important that everyone have a hobby or two but if they become obsessed with it then problems will happen.
 and_your_point_is
Joined: 1/17/2006
Msg: 142
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 1/30/2006 6:48:58 PM
instead of fighting them, maybe the girls should join them. That would be a way for them to spend some quality time together. Before video games, people played board games together.
 catch22_
Joined: 2/28/2005
Msg: 152
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/4/2007 1:14:18 PM
ill be right there! just let me get through this level.
 yellowcotton
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 154
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/26/2007 7:30:27 PM
Mnay years ago, I turned on my son's evil machine, just to fill in the time, until the clothes in the drier were ready. I think it was Final Fantasy 2. When the kids came home from school, I ordered pizza, and kept on playing to 10pm. I was at it again by eight the next morning. While grabbing some food for lunch, and I could hear it calling to me from the basement, the whole time I was in the klitchen. At five pm, there was a rebellion from the small fry. They wanted food, and not just cold cereal again. I realised something had to be done, so with incredible will power, I turned it off, and never went near another nintendo or X-box again. I am now 58 and a young friend just announced he had purchased a new Nintendo with wirless remote play, so the question is,"Can I trust myself near it?".

I can think of many good reasons to sever relations with a guy, and have, but video gaming isn't on my list.
 GuitarGuy_
Joined: 3/15/2007
Msg: 158
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/29/2007 8:28:03 PM
Um yeah, I don't really have time for video games. I can't be bothered.
 gizmosellschickens
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 162
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WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?
Posted: 5/29/2007 10:45:27 PM
Nothing wrong playing video games for a hour or so a day, and long as you dont play 6 hours a day it should not be a problem. Women talk on the phone for hours at a time some of them, and the men sometimes play video games. Can I blame men myself for doing it? No, Ive had gf that talk for three hours on the phone, and could get halfway thru baseball season with how long some of them talk on the phone hehe. Addiction is when you have no self control, or a complusion to do something that you know is bad but need a fix. Video games playing for 6 to 8 hours a day is bad, but an hour here and there wont kill you.
 gizmosellschickens
Joined: 5/20/2007
Msg: 163
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WHY DO MEN RUIN RELATIONSHIPS WITH VIDEO GAMES?
Posted: 5/29/2007 10:47:44 PM
Nothing wrong playing video games for a hour or so a day, and long as you dont play 6 hours a day it should not be a problem. Women talk on the phone for hours at a time some of them, and the men sometimes play video games. Can I blame men myself for doing it? No, Ive had gf that talk for three hours on the phone, and could get halfway thru baseball season with how long some of them talk on the phone hehe. Addiction is when you have no self control, or a complusion to do something that you know is bad but need a fix. Video games playing for 6 to 8 hours a day is bad, but an hour here and there wont kill you.
 HeavenlyLei
Joined: 4/4/2007
Msg: 170
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/29/2007 11:56:52 PM
Psha!

I would play the game with them. Even better, if they play fighing games, I'd love it :)
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 177
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/30/2007 8:38:38 AM
I've dated lots of guys into video games myself and I've never had any trouble diverting their attention. And when I didn't want to divert their attention, I did my own damned thing.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 179
Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/30/2007 8:51:58 AM
Mesgs 257&258
excellent points but I GOTTA throw in this "yahbut"...
It's one thing to step up and face whatever part one has played in the deterioration of a relationship. But to make a sweeping statement that one partner's escapism is ALWAYS the fault, or due to some lack, of/in the other partner, ignores the question of addictions and enablers. Of course we quit blaming alcoholics,drug addicts and gambling addicts partners and families for THOSE addictions.I'm not saying that every person who enjoys video games, internet games, or even chat rooms/forums(LOL) is an addict. But it's an issue that bears mentioning. Let's not IMMEDIATELY cast the blame on the partner of the "escapee",because it MIGHT go deeper than simple escapism.
In fact, lets take that concept of responsibility back to where it really belongs...if a person of either gender is SO dissatisfied with their life and their partner( or their kids or their job, whatever) that they must "escape" into a video game,why in the hell don't they put that time and energy into SOLVING those problems instead of just ESCAPING them?
Oh yeah, I forgot...if your relationship or even your whole damn life sucks, it MUST be somebody else's fault,so blame it on them and dive into that video game or bottle of JD, or the adrenalin rush experienced when gambling with this month's rent money...
I do not mean to discount simple escapism carried to excess, but to say that it's ALWAYS "escapism" that is somehow generating from a fault with the relationship caused by the non-escapist partner is pretty damn unfair.
I'm not here to debate whether there actually is, or is NOT, such a thing as addiction, I realize that there are schools of thought holding that addiction is a bogus concept for the weak of character ( and those who love them)to hide behind. But I don't think anybody should be making sweeping pronouncements that excessive involvement in video games has only ONE root cause.
Cindy O
 Steve_Sandy
Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 183
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Why do men ruin relationships with video games?
Posted: 5/30/2007 9:37:52 AM
not currently in a relationship, but do play mmorpg's like EVE online, find it can be fun, don't do it all the time and also play fps games like halo and UT.

not into shopping either, simply go and buy what i need and don't spend days window shopping or buying all the shoes and clothes i can find, just in case there is one i like :)

currently clearing the house and playing eve by mining resources, sort of thing I can do semi afk

would play a lot less if in a relationship and less if living in the same house, but some girls like it when her man plays the same game as her, if u don't like computer games, don't whine about it....

plenty of things women do that are stifling boring for blokes, but most blokes would not suggest that women stop them :)
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