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 Melissanicole
Joined: 5/27/2005
Msg: 2
BBW AND single mom... so hard.Page 4 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
Hun, Im 5'1, 108... its nothing to do with size. Ive been single for about 2 years. Theres someone out there for you... they'll come along when its time.
 Angel_73
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 3
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 9/22/2005 7:58:58 PM
Drinkjack... your an a$$hole!! and its guys like you that make it hard for any woman to trust what men say....

I have the exact same problem... I am 32 i am a bit over weight and i have a daughter... i was married been seperated for over 3 years and will be divorced within the next month or so... so yes i have been threw alot and would i change anything about it?... not really.. the weight thing can change but that takes time, the children thing is there wether you like it or not and so is the ex situation well nothing you can do about that either. But that doesnt mean I am less likable or less worthy of a good man in my life.

I find alot of guys dont really have a problem with the child thing or the divorce thing but they do with the weight thing...which is really sad cuz some of the nicest ladies out there are bigger ladies these men dont know what they are missing


I have been having a really hard time with this dating thing myself... i havent been on a date in over 10 months. most of the guys i have met this year only want sex from me and i dont know if its cuz i dont give it to them or what but i never hear from them after the first meeting. Could be the sex thing, could be the weight thing i will never know cuz i never have the chance to ask them. so i just assume its cuz of my weight. I think im alright looking and im not that big but i guess most guys are looking for that slim model trophy to date and it sucks big time.
 Angel_73
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 10
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 2/17/2006 8:55:42 AM
With so many of you saying that guys like bbw i would like to know where they are lol I am a single mom and i had this one guy want tomeet me right away one night he siad he was going to be in the area adn he wanted to stop by. I never met him before. he wanted to come to my place. i told him no cuz one i have my daughter here and he said well wait till she goes to sleep... alot of guys dont get that you dont want some strange guy in your place with your daughter there sleeping or not. I told him im not one to drop everything and meet at a seconds notice and he said he always does things last minute and i told him when i cant i am a mother and i cant just get up and go... I think that is one problem men have with dating single moms.

I have stoped looking, I have come to the realizatuion i will be single till i lose some weight and i just have to learn to live with it. I been single for 15 months havent had sex since then and havent even kissed a guy since march last year lol. I am even getting bored of my toys lmao I used to have a huge sexdrive but now its like i dont even care and it kinda scares me. The longer i go without physical contact with a man the less sexual i feel.. If that makes sence lol
 h0ldfast
Joined: 12/19/2006
Msg: 17
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Where are these guys?
Posted: 1/18/2007 3:55:16 PM
Of the serious dating relationships that I've had, most have been with single mothers and most were with BBWs. There are a lot of shallow men out there, but I don't think that being a BBW or a single mother is a deal breaker.
 GoldenApples
Joined: 3/16/2007
Msg: 26
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 3/19/2007 7:36:20 PM
Peanut, I will not attempt to give you advice, but I do have a question for you.... It has been proven on this forum that there are some great guys that would welcome not only a BBW but also a single mom, what is it that you are trying to work out for yourself to worry about being single for only 5 months? It almost looks like you are using your size and status as an excuse for not meeting someone... what about just taking time for yourself? Only you know what is best for you, I'm just curious.

These questions are brought to you by a strong, independant, Hot, BBW single mom
 galady37
Joined: 2/17/2007
Msg: 27
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 3/19/2007 7:43:30 PM
I think that it doesn't matter whether you're small or big, it's whats inside that counts. I know what you mean though by having a special needs child and finding someone. Its like when they find that out they're gone, or they want you and not the child.
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 10/3/2007 10:05:05 AM
I am going to have to agree with so many other posters and say that it isn't all about your weight. You have to love yourself and show that you are worthy of someone's time before they will give it to you!
My advice?
Go shopping, get a hot and sexy outfit no matter what the size. Get your nails done and your hair women! ENJOY and pamper a little... then get a babysitter for the night and hit the town with some friends! Enjoy your night and your spirits will be lifted. Take this time for yourself every once in a while...I try for once a month at least because babysitters for my little crew are hard to come by but do it as you can. Your own self worth/ self esteem will rise, your stress level will lower and you will be shocked at what might come your way!!
 EC22
Joined: 4/25/2007
Msg: 43
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 10/3/2007 7:26:11 PM
I think there are different viewpoints about dating a single parent. Some people don't care if a person is a single parent. Some people would prefer to date someone without kids, but it's not a requirement. Some people would never a date a single parent for a various reasons. If there are 2 women and one of them has kids and the other doesn't have kids. Everything else about them is the same. Personality, physical features, lifestyle etc. Many men would choose the woman without kids. In some other cases, a man could overlook the fact that she is a single mom if she matches everything else that he is looking for.

There are some men who would date and prefer BBWs. Yet I think the majority of people ( men and women ) aren't attracted to someone who is significantly overweight. If a BBW is comfortable with her weight, that's cool. If a BBW is going to complain about men not dating her due to her weight, then she should attempt to lose some weight. I think is weight is controllable in most cases.

If a man doesn't date a single parent or a BBW, it doesn't make him shallow or ignorant. Everyone has preferences. Some people don't date smokers. Some people might prefer someone from a certain religion or age range. Everyone is attracted or unattracted to certain physical attributes whether it's a certain race, height, hairstyle, body type etc. There are even some fat people who aren't attracted to other fat people.
 janofc
Joined: 6/1/2008
Msg: 48
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 6/17/2008 4:59:46 PM
I am at the largest size I have ever been but it is not the weight that bothers me. I just don't feel like I am taking care of me. I don't want my daughter to think she has to be a certain size to be beautiful. I want her to think you have to take care of yourself to be beautiful. Your outer looks will fade and your body will certainly change as you get older, but the inner you is what you need to always be sure of.
 JustMary65
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 49
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 6/18/2008 5:42:06 AM
Size, being single, and having kids are all excuses we use when we can't find 'the one', but the bigger problem is generally the person whose looking. I think life can be difficult if you allow it to be. I tend to agree with several posters that being confident in who you are is far more appealing than simply having a pretty face. I'm a single mom-overweight-work hard but I have a great man in my life. Is my life perfect-n0pe-but I try to always look at things from a positive point of view. I'm honest enough to say that wasn't always the case, but when I quit having a personal pity party is when I discovered my self worth and value as a human being.

The other thing to consider and realize is that not everyone is going to be into you-that's just how it is. Placing blame on other's doesn't change a thing-because you have to change your state of mind to improve your life and happiness. I've been on my own for over 6yrs. I took about a yr to do some soul searching because I had been in a long term marriage which ended on a sour note. I did meet a man who I fell in love with, but I pushed him away because I wasn't ready to be involved, but I had a hard time digesting that this fit handsome man really wanted ME. Again, looking back, it was my personal baggage I needed to unload before I could become emotionally involved with anyone.

The nice thing is, despite my stupidity in pushing this man out of my life-he's right back in it and has been for the past four yrs. He's a wonderful friend-lover and companion. He is very good to my children as well as me, and I'm lucky I got a second chance for a do-over. Do we have our ups and downs-yep-we sure do, but the thing that keeps us going is that we genuinely care about each other. He's never minded my size or the fact I'm a single mom-he even said to me that he wished that one day my kids would love him as much as they love me. We do well, because we each respect one another and are great friends. I told him he's the man I want to grow old with, and while that would make me very happy, I simply take each day as it comes.

No one is promised happiness or happily ever after-being happy in yourself makes all the difference in the world and that is the difference.
 JustMary65
Joined: 5/26/2008
Msg: 53
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 6/19/2008 10:24:11 AM
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ errrrrrrrr what the heck is that all about???

Can you say-disturbing?
 4408joseph
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 57
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 6/20/2008 10:15:22 AM
Oh, good lawrd...dare I even post

But Thanks Daizee Mae...for helping out the OP...

Now how about ME can you find me a web site while the singles are coming up with all the excuses why THEY can't find someone????

My thread is.......Hung like a hamster AND single dad....so hard

Thanks
 yooperbrat03
Joined: 7/19/2006
Msg: 58
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BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 6/21/2008 12:20:09 AM

Oh, good lawrd...dare I even post

But Thanks Daizee Mae...for helping out the OP...

Now how about ME can you find me a web site while the singles are coming up with all the excuses why THEY can't find someone????

My thread is.......Hung like a hamster AND single dad....so hard

Thanks




So your short, fuzzy, and cute?


Brat
 Kukaku
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 64
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 7/11/2008 3:53:39 AM
That's really great, good luck with your new someone special!
 Kukaku
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 65
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 7/11/2008 3:57:42 AM
Sorry, I'm new to posting. The above was a response to BeautifulChaos26's post.
 Kukaku
Joined: 6/22/2008
Msg: 66
BBW AND single mom... so hard.
Posted: 7/11/2008 4:19:56 AM
Being a BBW and single mom is one hurdle, but for me it's also knowing if I am ready for a relationship again. It's been 6 years since I broke up with my 5 year old's "dad", but I'm not always sure if I want to get close to anyone... I would like to be friends with guys first, then maybe if things progress towards a relationship. that would be cool. My concern is all the emotional drama/roller coaster ride that seems to go with relationships. I'm not interested in any of that. I don't just mean on the guy's side, but on my end as well. So, I've stayed away from the dating scene and even if a guy should be interested in me I generally don't notice, or I down play it and . Not like there is a lot to run from (I've wanted to use that smiley since first logging on).
I suppose this (my ad, this post) is my first real attempt at really trying to come out of my loaner state.... again.
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