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 AUTHOR
 JDMETRO
Joined: 5/9/2007
Msg: 73
how to detect liars.........???Page 3 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
Trust your instinct for starters. Apply the Duck Test. Pay attention to Signs and Signals

Patterns of behavior reveal liars: Pattern analysis is the key. What do they do, when and how and Why? Do their explanations make sense? The duck test - walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, swims like a duck -- it is a fricken DUCK.

Look for and notice inconsistencies and contradictions in behavior, what is said, and what is said vs what is actually done. Is there a pattern - a recurrent pattern? Look for, notice and take note of efforts to have unaccounted for time - turning out he/she was not where they said they would be and for omission of information that turns up by accident (it is easier to leave out information than to lie),

Are they only available by cell phone - no matter where she or he is ? (yes some people only have cell phones these days) but they work somewhere. Are they only available between 8:00 a.m. and 6:00 p.m. on the cell phone or any phone? They can never be contacted at work - Oh Really?

Regular people can be contacted most any time (those that are not lying) Those that are lying about being in another relationship, being married, having a job, etc. often cannot be contacted just any old time - how's that work?) Can he or she be contacted late at night by telephone - by a non cell phone?

Cease rationalizing his/her behavior - quit excusing his or her inconsistencies and contradictions, turn on the BS detection meter, apply the duck test - be skeptical.

He is on business trips and hunting/fishing trips and can NEVER be contacted - even by cell phone --- hmmmmm? Really now?

Joe
 crooked_clown
Joined: 6/22/2007
Msg: 81
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/2/2007 7:18:22 AM
Have you never lied in your life bahaha i find that hard to belive!
What are you Jesus?
Youve lied your self before so just look back to that and use it to help you see a liar!
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 86
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:40:34 AM
When someone tells you a story, then instantly adds onto it, then adds more, and finally it sounds a little too good to be true.

For example, I mentioned a place to a coworker of mine. He said, "Oh, yeah, I know the place. In fact I know the owner. I should call him, though, I'm storing a Mercedes Benz of his at my garage."

Now, is this a lie, a bullshyter, or....? It could be the truth, but it makes me keep an ear open for the next story I hear. When someone has to brag in order to tell me something...they could be telling me the truth, but its not a bad thing to have a healthy skeptism, either.

Its not so much we get taken in by lies, its that we hope something is there we could give to our own selves, and so we fall for what we hear, when if we heard it from someone else...we'd question it. Try not to look to be impressed by your new partner, try to get to know them, instead. If there is more show than substance....then you may have found a liar who lies to cover up that lack of substance.
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 87
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/2/2007 9:43:56 AM
"Liars will usually throw the ball into your court. For example, if they accuse you of having an affair, you can bet your bottom dollar it is THEM having an affair."

>>>Quite valid. Our behavior is the behavior we are most used to, experienced with, etc. So, if we see someone faced with an opportunity, we ASSUME they will do what we would do, because we are most used to how we handle things, rather than become less ego-centric, learn about other people, and understand what makes them tick.

So, this has nothing to do with this topic, but when people accuse you of things you haven't done...you're getting a good idea of what they would do, or have done.
 JDMETRO
Joined: 5/9/2007
Msg: 97
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/4/2007 7:57:37 AM
Yes - blondeandhappy - you are correct nothing is full proof in detecting lies. If you lived the 6 weeks over again - I bet you would detect the BIG LIE much sooner. With all the advice and suggestion here - you would now be better armed.

But I know what you mean... as I have told before - my long term g/f of many years lied about taking up a relationship with another man. I confronted her, told her what I thought I knew - she denied all. Then I showed her a love letter she had written in her hand with her signature - an original - not a copy --- she still denied it. -- amazing - simply amazing.

Joe
 Hot Buttered Soul
Joined: 6/25/2007
Msg: 102
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/4/2007 10:43:38 AM
To be honest.. I always watch how people treat other people... If I see them lying to others.. I know they will lie to me.

Remember.. especially in the initial stages of a courtship.. people tend to say the perfect things..
 Christian seeks Christian
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 108
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/5/2007 11:07:35 AM
read www.lovefraud.com
and
www.howtospotadangerousman.blogspot.com
Great sites, lots of great info.
Good Luck
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 114
view profile
History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/6/2007 11:10:28 AM
^ if a girl asks how her arse looks in jeans she better expect an honest answer. :)

The liars I've encountered often tell stories that are meant to impress - the elements in each tale are taken to the extreme. If they say they were in a car accident, it will be no ordinary accident, their car was so destroyed you couldn't even make out what it was - they were lucky to be alive. And if the tale does not seem to impress, they often throw in more things to spice it up - and then the car burst into flames or it was a pile-up. Liars rarely have minor fender benders.
 astimartini
Joined: 10/17/2006
Msg: 115
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History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/7/2007 4:10:40 AM
If my lips are moving, it's probably because I'm about to cry.
"Why can't you believe me? I really was abducted by aliens".
Keep a stiff upper, young man.
 dabigfishguy
Joined: 7/2/2007
Msg: 117
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History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/7/2007 7:31:13 AM
Yeah... true that(re: achilles). I'd like to add that body language does tell a lot. And the reason politicians are hard to catch in a lie is because they are "trained to lie".

I discussed this with a guy who has an awesome website about dating. He may seem pretty blunt there, but he got some solid advice there. check it out at http://www.freakydater.com . He knows a lot about human psychology, al though he may seem like an absolute ass.

I know one thing that is pretty true in most cases:

People who fold their hands or arms together while talking, are usually hiding something.

People who are constantly looking you in the eyes, trying to convince you in such way aren't always honest either.

People that can't even look 1 second straight into your eyes, may have some problems with the truth too.

And so there are many more, also described in this thread already.

Having that said, some people are just nervous and have these character trades by themselves. Or they have some confidence problems and fold their hands or arms together because they feel safer in that way. Or, or, or. So many reasons and factors involved... that you gotta do an entire study about it to get your facts straight.
 Wanda49
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 124
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/7/2007 10:07:33 PM
Give them some time before you do anything or trust them with anything you may be sorry for later. See if their actions matches their words on a consistant basis. They have to be a really good lier to tell the same lie twice.... and carefully watch their body language while they are talking to you.
 Wanda49
Joined: 4/30/2007
Msg: 132
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 6:42:45 AM
How do you weed out the jerks?? They lie to you to try to get what they want as quickly as they can..... Most of the time you will find that if some guy is giving you any attention at all, they are trying to get something from you for their own benefit - it is usually sex with guys.. maybe it is something else for women... They will do anything and play any game they can to get what they want if they want it badly enough.. and most guys have to have sex before eating to live.

One sure way is to tell them you will only meet in public for the first 2 or 3 times you see them. I was talking to one in here last night. He told me I was a great person right away.. first red flag... I could see the conversation leading to sex talk - asking when I 'did it' last...second red flag!!! Sometimes guys wait until they talk to you a second time before they try to find out how 'lucky' they will get when they are finally able to convince you to meet them, so before I call them or let them have my phone number, I chat with them fo 2 or 3 times which is usually quite enough time to figure it out. Most of these idiots want to talk on the phone right away. They think that if they can talk to you on the phone, they will have a better chance to convince you to meet them and try to find a way to get sex and then make you think it was your idea. Some guys are REALLY good at that! As soon as I told him he wouldn't get to meet me in private right away, he blocks me... DO YOU HAVE TO WONDER WHY??? I don't need any more proof to know what he is up to.. the same as 99.9% of the guys in places like this. He is another one of he hundreds of millions of jerks/players in here and if I met him in person like he wanted, he would TRY to play his game with me and I would never hear from him again. I save myself so much time by using this trick... and it works for me every time. I know how to get rid of these idiots in seconds.

TIME is the only way to know if someone is a lier or not.. TIME is the a sure way to weed out the jerks.. and most of the time you only need a few minutes to figure them out. They are in a hurry to 'get some' so they don't waste any time trying to find out if he is going to be successful with you.
 TroyMcLure
Joined: 4/8/2007
Msg: 133
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 7:50:38 AM
sodium pentathol...
ask them questions you already know the answer to ..... heh heh
the fact is that it is hard for a person to device a test for a respondent that is smarter than the author.... and that is why 50% of marriages fail ........

sodium pentathol...
ask them questions you already know the answer to ..... heh heh
the fact is that it is hard for a person to device a test for a respondent that is smarter than the author.... and that is why 50% of marriages fail ........
 rockondon
Joined: 2/21/2007
Msg: 134
view profile
History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 9:03:34 AM
after reading that last post I got this strange sense of deja vu
 TroyMcLure
Joined: 4/8/2007
Msg: 135
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 9:19:42 AM
geez the lab must have screwed up the dosage again ....
just ignore that inner voice and if you feel a sharp prick stay away from the light...
Criminoligists and policeguys have spent a great deal of time on this and other pyschoactive goodies to see how far the envelopecan be pushed regarding the human brain and behavior... there are some fairly easy ways to spot deviants though ...

and none of us are completely innocent
 fonzerrellie
Joined: 6/27/2006
Msg: 137
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History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 7:13:58 PM
I find a good one is... most people that tell you what you want to hear instead truth. also if someone tends to allway's agree with you thier probably blowing smoke up your a**

the more you seek truth the more obvious the liars will become ;)
 eb3267
Joined: 1/29/2007
Msg: 138
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/8/2007 9:23:46 PM
Watch for the little white lies, the omissions and that little red light flashing in your head..

Don't ignore it !!!

If he's doing things on the sly, you will catch it, if you're looking for it..


.oO( I want to know why they haven't made a bullsh*t detector yet ?)
Life would be so much easier !!!
 Christian seeks Christian
Joined: 4/20/2007
Msg: 144
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/16/2007 4:39:58 AM
www.lovefraud.com teaches you how to identify liars. Click on true lovefraud stories and blogs and read. wwwdotlovefrauddotcom
 dannyebreeze
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 148
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/18/2007 9:28:14 PM
Hey Capt. Zig is right on, down and to the left they are constructing, down in feeling mode, up to the right searching for memory, ex something or other aren't you, anyway hon, go on feeling, what is normal, anything else, file it away and explore it if you have question, don't let emotions run away with you we all want to trust, but things that bother you or send up a flag don't ignore them and realizing it when it happens is the trick, later is to late to think ahhhh, but haven't most of us done that.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 150
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 7/18/2007 11:12:49 PM
If they are right handed - the lower left ear kind of twitches when they are lying.


(that is total bs but I wanna act like I know important stuff like this)
 Coheedrocks27
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 157
view profile
History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 9/7/2007 6:45:35 AM
I have been lied to by two different women on here. Everything seemed perfect. Then every time we set a date to well..have a date..everything would come up. One even went as far to say she had developed cancer...and i believed it..because i didn't think anyone would be sick enough to actually lie about that..but of course she was. Both of the girls were playing me and 3 other guys, just toying with us.

Never BEGIN to trust ANYBODY until you actually hang out with them a few times.
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 167
view profile
History
how to detect liars.........???
Posted: 12/11/2007 1:56:32 PM
I look deeply into a man's eyes. I can usually see if they are telling me the truth
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