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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?      Home login  
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 sweetblonde19
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 268
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?Page 12 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
I dated a marine for 2 years. I met him 2 weeks after he got injured in Iraq. His mom worked with my mom and I decided to write him while he was in the hospital. I was with him through 60+ surgeries and when he was medicated and telling me horrorific stories. The military brainwashes out men. Bobby was suppose to get medical discharge and be out for the rest of his life. In the 2 years of the marines telling him this, they gave him an office job processing death certificates for other marines. It messed him up and how he treated me. He had many opporutunities to come home and visit and chose not to for 6 months. Within these 6 months, he would eat an extra large pizza every day and drink a 12 pack. He gained 100 pounds and became a raging alcoholic and drug addict. The only way I would date another military man is if he is not suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome. This and the alcohol and his weight took a toll on our relationship.
 sugar8200
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 269
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 6:52:15 PM
I dated a guy for a year before he was sent overseas, we did the whole ldr and it was hard but we managed it and i supported him while he was over there (emotionally & mentally). He was over there for 15 months and when he came back he was a completely different person, it made it more difficult than when he was physically gone. I didn't understand what he was going through and it made it very hard to talk to him and such. We ended up splitting 4 months after he got back, we are friends and hang out still, but he's not the same person who I met several years ago. I have several friends that are married to guys in the military and they absolutely love it, and I have others who hate it. I guess it just depends on your strength and patience to go through something like that imo.
 custis
Joined: 3/16/2005
Msg: 270
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 3/11/2008 6:58:47 PM
"he would eat an extra large pizza every day and drink a 12 pack. He gained 100 pounds and became a raging alcoholic and drug addict. The only way I would date another military man is if he is not suffering from post traumatic stress syndrome. This and the alcohol and his weight took a toll on our relationship. "

My oldest son has been in the army for almost ten years now. He has two children and a devoted wife whom he is very happy with. He met her while he was in the army. He rarely ever drinks and then it is only one beer or one mixed drink and he is done. His offwork hobby is buying old cars and turning them into cherried-out works of art and selling them. Yea, there are people with problems in the military, and there are people with problems working at McDonalds too.
 asphaltcowboy1982
Joined: 3/28/2008
Msg: 271
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 7:27:37 PM
It does take a special breed of women to date or marry a militay person. The military is very demanding of not only the person who is in but his/her mate. Do not judge everybody by how he turned out. they are differant after they go to war but not all become like that. My dad was in Vietnam and was in an outfit that had a price on their heads preferbly dead because of what they were doing over there but he has never done drugs and does not drink.
 Spitfire1956
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 272
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 9:24:36 PM
I was married to a military man..and yes, I would do it again in a heartbeat. When he was deployed..I would halp the other wives who wasn't as strong as I was or I would come up and help his parents, and go to my parents and stay. I was there for him in every aspect, and he was with me..we were one. When he came home I would be there to support him in anyway I could. When he was medically discharged due to his back..we refused to let it get us down. I made damn sure every base was covered while he was gone, made sure the bills were taken care of, sent him care packages all the time of things he needed or couldn't get there......but, I know we had a very special bond between us that no one could break.
 crazytimes1
Joined: 3/24/2008
Msg: 273
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/12/2008 11:26:51 PM
Does not take a special person. Does take a special person to do it, keep their legs closed when he is away and be supportive. The majority end very poorly indeed.

For a woman is probably going to be the reason I leave when I leave.
 justagrl070
Joined: 4/27/2007
Msg: 274
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 5:42:10 AM
I would definitely date or marry a man in the military. To be honest would even be a preference for me. I grew up with my father in the military and he was away for extended periods of time. I have so much respect for the men and women that chose that profession and i guess for me I would feel honoured to be in a relationship with such a man. So... where do i find one!!!!
 grizzly_bear
Joined: 5/1/2005
Msg: 275
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 8:43:02 AM
I spent 16 years in the forces, earned myself 4 masters degrees from universities all over canada, participated in virtually every campaign going during my tenure, decorated 7 times, numerous citations and awards, and to all of you ladies out there, although I can't speak for all guys, do yourselves a favor and don't do it. I served with thousands of troops and can count the guys on one hand who stayed true to their significant others and spouses, any guy who flames me for my comment here, is only pissed because I told the truth.
 Lola and Her Honey
Joined: 11/25/2007
Msg: 276
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 9:52:30 AM
My Honey is retired from the military after serving for most of his adult life. He possesses a lot of character traits that I find very desirable and have found lacking in many men in our age group.

He believes in and practices things like loyalty and dedication, commitment, optimism and working hard and as a team. He understands the importance of ensuring that the people he loves and cares about, know how he feels. And he lives each day with joy and gratitude that he has the opportunity to do so.

Military life requires that people place a higher value on the greater good as opposed to focussing solely on their own wants and desires. It teaches people how to sacrifice and how to appreciate that those sacrifices will ultimately create a better life for everyone, including themselves. And it teaches that life can be snatched away when you least expect it so don’t waste a second of it on bitterness and anger over things you can’t change or aren’t willing to change.

Not everyone who serves in the military learns and becomes instilled with these principles but those who do discover that when applied, they are the same principles that create successful relationships.

LH
 jf468
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 277
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:18:39 AM
I would be hesistant to date a man in the military. People in the military are often away and/or constantly moving from place to place. It can be difficult to establish a serious relationship when a man isn't around that often.
 enigmamystery
Joined: 2/28/2007
Msg: 278
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:29:01 AM
Absolutely. I see no reason that one should not date or marry a military person. If they are the one that connects with them on all levels, why should their job hinder it. Yes, the military part of the relationship means they might be deployed or move or whatever Uncle Sam tells them to do. If there is a will, there is a way. It just has to be that both parties are strong and really want the relationship and all that it entails. Obviously if you are the type that is clingy, this is not a relationship for you.
 tinydancer123
Joined: 3/3/2007
Msg: 279
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/13/2008 10:45:48 AM
Other than being somewhat worried for his safety, I'd love the space although it would be great if he could at least email every few days to check in with me that he's ok and just to be in touch.

He'd also need to really know and understand my character, because then, he'd have no trouble trusting me.

If someone else has not said it here already - absence makes the heart grow fonder.

I'd have no trouble being faithful no matter how long he was away.

Lt Col Hunter - I am truly sorry for the grief a soldier and distraction a soldier would feel knowing his woman is cheating. That's awful and dangerous I would think. I think it's a disgrace to marry someone that you know will be away and then use it as an excuse to be unfaithful but then unfaithfulness is always a disgrace on the cheater. You said it takes a special woman and a damn rare one. I know I am both and I'm sure there are many others out there too. Pity about the others but you know the guys do the same thing so cool it with the gender bashing ok?
 solas_bandia
Joined: 12/12/2007
Msg: 280
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/14/2008 4:55:15 PM
i would consider it, as long as it clicked ther ewould e no reason not to. yeah, is a job, but i would expect him to be willing to work with me if i wanted to travel for job as well. give a little, get a little, ya know? i think it would be awesome to be wih a military guy actually.
 smileee4u
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 281
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/14/2008 5:01:35 PM
Married an Army Officer

I was an Army Officer

My husband retired an Army Officer

He divorced me

I was a career Army Wife, entitled to Half retirement pension, plus investments

Our son is currently serving in Iraq

Son, of course, grew up a military brat

What in the hell was the question? I am so shell-shocked, I can't remember
 uptowngirl000
Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 282
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/14/2008 5:09:04 PM
I certainly would!!
 hunter65613
Joined: 8/19/2007
Msg: 283
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Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/14/2008 5:09:38 PM
just looked at some of the responses, some people amaze me at their answers, the military is never the problem, its your relationship!!! most military men do their job if its asked of them, a man working at taco bell is just as apt to cheat on his wife or girlfriend as a military man. actually more so sense he would be working more around women than a man in the military. its not like there are thousands of women in the armed forces. for those who blame the military either male or female you should look at yourself, the military has nothing to do with a marrige failing or succeeding. i was divorced while i was in the military but it was not the militarys fault she found a sugar daddy twice her age.... (lighten up frances)
 CodeNameFaith
Joined: 12/28/2007
Msg: 284
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 4/14/2008 5:17:05 PM
I would! As a matter of fact, I have dated someone in the military. We got along great and there were very little problems between us. Then he died. I was crushed. Still miss him.
 IHeartUSMC
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 285
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 5/12/2008 2:51:28 AM
I was in the military, so I have a good idea of what to expect. I know that it is hard for soldiers, Marines, airmen, and sailors when they're deployed. It makes things a lot easier knowing that they have someone at home supporting them, and patiently awaiting their return home. If my partner were in the military, it would not change my thoughts about our future together.
So, to answer your question... yes, I would date/marry a man in the military.
Oorah!!
 Spitfire1956
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 286
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 5/12/2008 4:15:26 AM
Yes, of course...I know how I would be when he deployed..so it would be on his shoulders if he wants me there when he returns home..if he is after everything he can tap then no I won't be there waiting, but if he wants a true and faithful wife/girlfriend, he will be waiting just to see me!
 SnugglesDaBunny
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 287
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 5/12/2008 10:13:53 PM
I would in a heartbeat!

Actually, I guess you can say that it is my intention to date and/or marry a military guy. My dad was a career officer in the military and I grew up on military bases. I have a deep respect for men in uniform and I think the majority has been tainted by the actions of the minority. Not all military men cheat on their spouses nor do they abuse their spouses. In fact, it was my experience that there were more family focused and spiritually sound men in the military than I encountered in civilian life.

I have no problem with the idea of deployment. There were times that my parents were together and other times when they were separated; if you have a strong relationship then this separation should be handled in stride. Yet, if you have a poor relationship, the long detachments will be the straw that breaks the camel's back.
 Therealgoodone
Joined: 5/3/2008
Msg: 288
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 5/19/2008 2:59:43 PM
I personally could say yes, I have not and would not ever cheat on a man especially if he is deployed, I hear that so much and it makes me sick. But Im the type of person that would make it work, if you really cared about him then yes it would be totally worth it. I know its hard, i have a brother in the military and i do see how it effects his family, its hard but it can be done, so i would say if he was totally worth it and we connected then i most definently would.
 gaga2222
Joined: 11/30/2008
Msg: 289
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 2/8/2009 5:58:00 PM
Yes, I would! In fact I pray that some day I will find a wonderful loving service member to love and respect. They bring stability in every woman's life. As long as there is respect coming from both parties a stable military life is possible. I am an optimist!
 luvs_history
Joined: 4/10/2009
Msg: 290
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 6/18/2009 9:10:06 PM
yes. i think its romantic to be challanged on showing someone you care in various ways. With the amount of ways of communication now a days its alot easier then the olden ones(days).

 Gigglemepink
Joined: 5/11/2009
Msg: 291
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 6/18/2009 9:16:39 PM
I had an army guy ask me tonight if I'd be willing to marry him to help him get more benefits. I wouldn't have to live with him and he is able to make more money. We'd live seperate lives but be married on paper.


I turned the offer down.
 newmexicoleo
Joined: 2/25/2009
Msg: 292
Would u date at guy or marry guy who is in the military?
Posted: 6/20/2009 3:08:56 PM
The answer is yes, I would. I am involved with a military man now and I would not have it any other way.
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