Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  >      Home login  
Joined: 5/6/2008
Msg: 247
view profile
Would you date someone with Herpes?Page 8 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
I'm refering to HPV here, NOT herpes.
Joined: 12/3/2011
Msg: 248
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 11:36:24 AM
I would probably. They say herpes gets better as time goes on, less and less outbreaks, and contrary to those Valtrex commercials, there's no evidence it stops you from kayaking or yoga, lol. It would really depend on the girl, though. Not just anyone, there'd have to be some magic there.
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 249
view profile
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 12:11:28 PM

personally i think if someone has a potentially life threatening contagious disease they should be put on colonies like they did in the old days with the leppers

I can't believe I'm electing to waste my time responding to this garbage.

1) Herpes is not HIV. It is not a life-threatening disease.
2) You are actually advocating putting people with HIV in colonies?

What kind of inhumane monster are you, anyhow? People like you deserve to suffer in the most horrible way possible. Are you so incredibly stupid that you cannot just leave them alone? Afraid to breathe the same air are you? the old days, people were too ignorant to understand how to deal with disease. Most of us have managed to get educated since then.

I can't say anymore without getting banned.
Joined: 1/27/2011
Msg: 250
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 4:28:45 PM
im the monster? lol ur funny, im the monster cause i think ppl with deadl contagious diseases should be segregated into colonies. yet the ppl with these diseases are considered humane because to tromp about n spread their diseases without so much as a thought given to at least letting ppl know what they have . you got messed up priorities .

im still laughing at you calling me a monster lol i wonder who you will consider the mon ster if someone gets u stuck with a disease or perhaps a young familyt members life gets destroyed because one of these people didnt care to disclose this information prior to them having sex.

its funny tho how ya all sit there n defend these people who know that the best course of actrion is in fact a colony or a forced disclosure as i think for them to disclose it is pretty tough to do hence most cant do it and stay locked in their homes because of the public scrutiny.
if they were in colonies howver or were made visually aware of others with the disease then their lives would be made a 100 % better, they like the rest of us have no clue who else has it and the medical establishment loves that scenario as it feeds them an ever growing population of future patients and guinea pigs.

however i see most prefer a society bent on the hidden and the lie and the idea that noone needs to know and noone needs to tell
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 251
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:27:01 PM
We should also lobby for an ignorance colony.... ^ ^ ^ ^ ^....that's fair.

v v v v : He does kinda look like a supremacist. Didn't think of that.
Joined: 1/11/2006
Msg: 252
view profile
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:27:38 PM
Umm dude... If you believe in God---any God---You're already in preference of a society "bent on the hidden and the lie."

You strike me as someone highly impressionalble and in love with segregation. There was a time when people wanted blacks and jews segregated... Leper colonies were all the rage. I think we need to have dippings--like they used to use for witches. Except we'll use use these ones for religios mena nd women like the pope for instance, and politicians. If we hold them under water for 5 minutes and they surface alive, then they're not liars. If they're dead, they've been lying all along.

You really need to get out more bro. Forget all of that though... I'm just kiding. You're half right. We do need colonies... So, how rational does this sound? All the Jews should go back to Israel. All the the Muslims and peiple of darker skin colour should just get shipped back to Africa... We'll make the whole damn thing a colony! ANd hell, why stop there? Let's send the entire cast of Jersey Shore straight to Italy and from there, maybe they can go to hell. All the Germans should go back to that colony called Germany. Likewise the Chinese. Send them all back to China...

Sounds pretty stupid, doesn't it. Now look in the mirror and try to live with yourself and I'll thank the stars that nobody else has to.
Joined: 1/11/2006
Msg: 253
view profile
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:31:14 PM
Just an addition... I get it. You're from Alberta. Leave him alone everybody... They're different. Trust me. I've lived there. It's a sad lonley place. Not an intelligent conversation in the entire province. It makes the Tea Party look smart.
Joined: 7/6/2011
Msg: 254
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:31:35 PM
I would not date someone that I know for a fact has herpes. Just my preference...just not willing to take a chance. Never even had a fever wouldn't want ANY kind of herpes if I can help it. Sorry if that makes me judgemental.
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 255
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 7:34:15 PM
^^^^^ that does not make you judgemental, thats all the OP was asking.
Joined: 1/27/2011
Msg: 256
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 11:06:54 PM
Lol always back to the jews it goes eh how droll
Look out christy unless u accept and swim in disease and pretend that you are compassionate and empathetic of all the misfits and diseased masses out there the lil fascist pc groups will hang u up on a martyr tree. Where exactly you get the nerve to impine my comment then go off about how im a supremacist is beyond me, but thats how u gain support tho , by lies and misdirection, always trying to make out like your the "good guys" when really all your doing is manipulating the comments and stories to fit your own agenda.
However a comment from a guy from ontarihole really doesnt add up to anything mOre then what they claim a comment from alberta is.
Jews should go back to isreal etc wtf is that all about? Push your agenda elsewhere if thats your vesion of a conversation u should yet out more
Joined: 3/11/2012
Msg: 257
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/27/2012 11:11:38 PM
I wouldn't if I knew they had it. Sorry I just prefer not to get any STDS. Never had chicken pox or fever blisters.
Joined: 1/13/2012
Msg: 258
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/28/2012 1:21:19 AM
I dated a woman who was up frnt about it, and had a great relationship, I always used protection and a major scubbing with antibacterial soap afterwards, I ended it after a month or so because it scared me more and more. I have been tested several times since, and always came back clean
Joined: 3/15/2012
Msg: 259
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/28/2012 2:34:41 PM
I've tried dating sites for those with H. Not everyone knows about them and joins. Therefore it is a much smaller pool of fish despite the statistics of how many people have it. The chances of finding someone close to me, who I'm actually attracted to are very small. The chances of meeting someone on POF who I'm attracted to, isn't an ass and can accept me as I am is far greater.

I've met people who are accepting of it but things did not work out for other reasons that were totally unrelated.
Just normal dating stuff. Like finding out on the 2nd date that they had been in prison or are an alcoholic. lol :)

I've also spoken to people who have it and think that we should automatically be dating just because we have this 1 thing in common. Seriously, would you date someone with only 1 thing in common with you? Of course not. :P

Live and let live, people.
Joined: 1/27/2011
Msg: 260
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/29/2012 6:02:02 AM
well i can say i feel for your plight tinroofer, and ive never said the people that have it deserve it or slept around to get it , as far as i know it can be gotten pretty much in any way a person can imagine, frankly medical advances leave alot to be desired as far as self protection from diseases, frankly its in the medical profession best interests to let people get them rather than prevent them .
yah dating someone with just a disease as a staple is pretty much dumb, but im sure there are a great many other people out there that you havent met yet that you may have a few more things in common with , hell most people these days dont even have a disease in common, most just have a sense of lust n then its over .

alot of people have been rambling on about communication and education as a means to not get the disease, yet how many people that got the disease had an education and communicated, and low and behold they got it to!!
sure herpes is a cold sore, slightly different version of it we are talking about in this post tho we arent talking about a garden variety cold sore that goes away in a few days , as tinroofer can attest it is a stigma that is eternal, obviously having it hasnt made her life any better so why would so many people be pretending that its not a big deal.
im a germophobe so i really dont knowingly sit down and talk to people with contagious diseases, not even the common cold. its not the person i avoid its the germs. so sorry if some people presume that makes me a monster .

i know if i had it id prefer to be on a colony with people like myself who i could freely associate with and hopefully find someone i had more than just the disease in common with. i can only imagine how id feel if i had the disease and some nice girl opted to date me anyways, and then i gave it to her.
id prefer to not have that guilt on my head for the rest of my days .
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 261
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/29/2012 4:24:57 PM
I don't think people with Herpes should live in a colony on some island far away, but they do just have to inform any partners that they are interested in getting sexually involved with about their disease. It is up to the other person to accept or deny.

I would still probably 'date' someone with herpes, just wouldn't sleep with them, and I'd want to see if the chemistry is there for something more. But I hate to say it, but I think just having that constant "fear" in the back of my mind about "well, what happens if I do fall for this person and I do sleep with them and I do get it" will be an issue. Also, if I did decide to go through with it, I think the sex would be too "clinical" for me (i..e - I would feel like running to the bathroom immediately to scrub off, and during sex, I would always be looking at or thinking about ways to minimize contact - even though knowing full well that that effort would be pointless since intercourse in the end gets you as close as you will get!).

Sadly, I think I would have to pass on dating for more than a month or two for fear of that classic "getting comfortable and falling for the person" and then ending up in a relationship with them. When feelings get in the way, you make rash decisions. Therefore, again, yes, I'd date them to get to know the person a bit better but they would REALLY have to blow my mind within the first few weeks to month for me to be like WOW. SHE IS THE ONE! That RARELY happens this day and age.

That said, the ONLY other way i MIGHT consider dating and sleeping with a girl with herpes is if she happened to be a long time good friend. like, right now for example, i do have some "girl friends" who I am strong with and good friends. right now there is no attraction with them, but you always hear those stories of how all of a sudden, something happens and you fall for that person that was there in front of you for all those years. in THIS case, if one of these girls said 'i have herpes' - I MIGHT let it pass because at this point in time, knowing that person as a great friend for +5/+10 years... you know they are legit. and you may be willing to take a bit more of a chance on that person. you don't need to "get to know them" much more other than the sex part.

It's real tough though in the end. Regardless, people date for months and then when they get to the sex part of it all... the chemistry isn't there and so the relationship dies. That happens in normal relationships all the time. Imagine dating someone with herpes, having sex, figuring out that the sex isn't that good and the "vibe" is not there, breaking up with them for that reason (which is very valid) but then GETTING herpes!

THAT is the issue.
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 262
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/29/2012 7:34:42 PM
It must be tough to date when you have genital herpes - or should I say, it must be hard to get into sexual relationships when you have genital herpes. I am sure a lot of guys and girls will "date" someone as friends, kissing, affection and getting to know the person - but it HAS to take a certain type of person and chemistry to develop to actually take it to the next level, correct?

Unlike a relationship where both don't have genital herpes, after about a month or so (or sooner or later) but SOMETIME somewhat early these days (especially if you're in your 20's), people dating start to have sex.

So, while a lot of people here say "they are just human and it's just a disease" (and yes I agree, both statements are true), it HAS to be a bit more of a bigger commitment on the part of the person saying "yes. i will take the risk". It's not that people with genital herpes aren't wonderful people, it's just, it must be more difficult to get to that stage with someone to be able to say "yes, this is a great person, i don't care about the disease".

I do feel bad for them because they have done nothing wrong but now must suffer with another complication in an already complicated world of dating.
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 263
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/30/2012 1:57:32 PM
I would date someone with herpes If I liked the person and there are sparks,. You have to learn about it and it is not bad. people are walking around with stds and do not know it and they are passing it on.
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 264
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/30/2012 5:50:50 PM

that's because you are older (+50 years old)

I do NOT mean that as an insult.

I am 35, and have to say that as I have aged, I am finding less and less of an issue with dating someone with herpes. But that's because relationships now are more meaningful, and I also know that there is stronger potential now for that girl to be the special someone, if I were to commit to her. But still, I'd proceed with caution and sex would be off the table for some time (probably until I knew I was in love with her)

When you are 25, this view is much different. You have a LOT of time ahead of you - you are in the peak of your educational career and start of professional career. You want to get out there and date and know that while you may be in a relationship with someone, your life will be changing rapidly in the next few years and who knows where it will take you. Simply put, if you are in the "20's" - the "clubbing" and just general dating scene is NOT the same as your friends who don't have herpes. You have to proceed a bit more carefully.

I have done the quick 'check' in my head and say to myself "would I have dated that girl I was with 7 years ago if she told me she had herpes". The answer is consistently no. I would have been too scared. While I was fine with a committed relationship (i don't cheat), I was not naiive enough to think that at 26 years old, that THAT girl could be the one forever and ever. Dating was fun and exciting and exploratory as it should be. I didn't want to have to deal with the fact that this girl that I just met 3 weeks ago has put this huge issue/question on the table for me.

The issue with herpes for me is not the pain - it is the fact that if you get it, you have to explain it. The older you get, the less years of that explaining you have ahead of you.

Imagine if your 18 year old daughter asked you "mom. my bf has herpes. should i date him?" i'm sure you'd say no, because you damn well know the chances of those two being together are slim to none in this day and age, herpes or not.

If that same girl is 38, it is not as big of an issue.
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 265
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/30/2012 7:31:40 PM
RSX your age group and younger are the largest group for STDs. You may not cheat but what about the person you are with. People your age and younger are dating clubbing etc and getting STDS. people are walking around with stds and do not know it and are passing it on. And 18 years olds and teens are having babies and getting stds the largest group is your group and younger for stds. people cheat it is human nature.One of the biggest things that causes break ups is cheating.You break up go on to the next person and that is how you get stds being with different people. I never cheated it is not right to hurt someone you love. I feel bad for the young today they have a lot of things to deal with. It is not fun being young today. Most People today do not stay with each other a long time today.Most people today are breaking up for stupid reasons they are not willing to work at staying with each other. So they are back out there dating different people and they catch an std. You may get tested but sometimes the test are wrong or do not pick up anything.
Joined: 12/12/2010
Msg: 266
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/30/2012 7:58:42 PM
No. Not much else to say, but no.
Joined: 1/12/2012
Msg: 267
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 4/30/2012 9:13:10 PM
FUNNYGIRL - my post was not meant to suggest that I believe that I am clear of the risk of STD's and do not think it is a concern when dating. it is.

my point was to note that, for a person in my age range that has it, and knows they have it, and has outbreaks versus a person in my age range that does not have it, there is a relatively greater difficulty in dating due to the fact that a moral person should disclose that info.

my point was NOT to suggest that i am NOT at risk to std's if I simply even ask the next girl i sleep with if she is clean and she says no and then I contract something.

my point was that for person A that does not have herpes versus person B that does, the notion of disclosing information makes dating more difficult for person B. Dating in general in our age range is difficult to begin with, because as you point out, people lie, cheat, deceive, and move on to one girl to the next, pick up girls and clubs and all of that. ON TOP OF THAT, having the disease already makes it that much harder.

even if you are in my age range and are DONE with the crazy club scene and just go to work and do a 9 to 5 job, come home, and go to church or your temple and want to meet a nice, wholesome, person, or meet a girl or guy through a family friend, maybe someone your mom knows even through her friends - even after all of THAT - if you've got Herpes and your mom sets you up with a nice girl who is your age who is looking to marry and who is STD free - what do you do? you have to disclose, and it makes life a bit more difficult.
Joined: 1/27/2011
Msg: 268
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 5/1/2012 3:11:26 AM
keyword there being "moral" we live in an immoral society, further pushed to extremes due to the ideologies of capitalism . ie i take what i want and you can scrounge for what u want.
people dont tell u or give u anything unless it somehow benefits them, sexually economically or in some other way .
people at 35 are no more apt to want a disease than a person of any age, anyone that pretends they are into getting a disease " because they are to old to care" is just fooling themselves. especially a highly contagious communicable disease. an older person even tho they have a foot in the grave still have to associte with people on a daily basis. ie co workers, kids, grandkids, spouses etc. so if you seem to think that just because you get a disease it only affects you , your completely wrong and your mindset is completely and solely selfish. u have a duty to try and stop the spreading of diseases and at a certain age one would hope youd clued into that fact.
if i had a kid n a grandparent had one fo those disease the only way theyd see the kid is thru a bubble or a window, and if the grandparent willfully got the disease theyd be banned from ever seeing my kids .

as far as im concerned if you willfully get the disease, you give up the rights due to your own poor judgement , frankly you should pay for your own medications as well .
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 269
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 5/1/2012 8:43:17 AM
Just Nobody is to old to care. Having one foot in the grave LOL that was uncalled for. No matter what your age is you have to watch out for STDS. People are having sex with STDS. People are having sex and not telling the other person they have an STD. And the test for herpes cost a lot of money and some insurance will not pay for it. And herpes you have to ask the doctor to be tested. You are single dating different people you are having sex so you have to be tested every time with a new person and that cost money. Condoms do not protect you and test give false readings or nothing shows up on the test yet. So you that think staying with one person helps it may but you do not know how many people the where with or if they will cheat on you. We live in a immoral society. People lie cheat etc. And there is a lot more new STDS coming out . If you are having sex chances are you will catch something sooner or later. You do not know that you have an STD and you pass it on. I think one in 4 has herpes. Look up herpes it is getting out of control that a lot of people are getting it every day. When you have herpes you have a big chance of getting aids.
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 270
view profile
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 5/1/2012 8:51:54 AM

a highly contagious communicable disease.

are we still talking about herpes??? because yes it is contagious... but not HIGHLY.... if it were highly that would mean you could get it from casual contact which you can't.....

if i had a kid n a grandparent had one fo those disease the only way theyd see the kid is thru a bubble or a window, and if the grandparent willfully got the disease theyd be banned from ever seeing my kids .

are you serious??? you must have a horrible relationship with your parents if you would be so quick to ban them from your life for something you can't get casually.......

I have a friend who is HIV positive... so she shouldn't be allowed in my house if there are kids there??? should she have her own kids removed from her care??? because her kids aren't positive... neither is her NEW husband who married her knowing she is HIV positive......

I have another friend who has HPV and is dying from the cancer now... so should I ban her from my house too???

I have a co-worker who has cold sores often... should I quit my job and not be around her???

I don't care how any of them got what they have.... it isn't relevant.... they are my friends.... they are good people.... stuff happens to good people too....

Educate yourself on HOW people catch things.... it is fine if you don't want to have the kind of intimate relationship you would need to have with someone to catch it.... but eliminating people from your life because of if... sad.... and judgmental....
Joined: 1/27/2011
Msg: 271
Would you date someone with Herpes?
Posted: 5/1/2012 2:05:58 PM
actually yes they should be, just because you dont care about catching stuff doesnt mean everyone should be as reckless .
how can ya say it isnt highly communicable lol it only takes one time to catch it .
people keep yammering about educate yourself , you mean to go and read up what drs are putting out? information that may be up to 25 yrs out of date already . there isnt any current information . hell they dont even put out new drugs anymore just keep splashing out 20 to 30 yr old pills
u seem to oput alot of faith in a medical system bent on the treatment of diseases rather than the curing of them .
frankly your thoughts about the worth of certain people and how nice they are ,arent really relelvant as noone said they werent nice people . hell typhoid mary was probably a great woman
judgemental ... maybe however putting innocent people with out a choice at risk due to your own stubborness is ignorant and frankly its you making the judgment call for them so how are you any less judgmental than i am . whats wrong with making a judgement as to who u choose to associate with anyways? we have the freedom and the rights to back up them small freedoms. and u think im bad because i choose to avoid harmful stuations rather than delve into them? so by your logic since ... nvm i could draw all kinds of silly things to make you ideas sound as drastic as you try to make mine but i wont .
and yes if you have a co worker with open sores oozing fluid s , yah avoiding that person may be a good idea, i know i would ,

Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  >