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 masterspirit
Joined: 10/20/2005
Msg: 22
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How do I make him fall in love with me?Page 4 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
That sucks. I've been through similar problems at your age. Honey , really , you can't make him love you. You sound like a really sweet, loyal person and if you find yourself running around and trying to please him and feel that's not being returned you need to get out. DON'T take the-well I have no-one else mentality and settle. If your self-esteem was where it should be you wouldn't even be asking anyone for advice. After seeing that he's talking to other girls and saying the same things after saying he wants to be with you should have been enough. You're torturing yourself here and you don't need to do that!! Do you believe in God. I often find I have very few people to depend on but God is always there to give me the strength to do whats best for me. Thats what you need to do.
 AnGeLbEaNz
Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 29
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 2:13:48 PM
Hey i just thought i'd tell u all about something...maybe u can help me....i was married to a guy for 4 years.......together for 10....we have 3 kids..and he means the world to me...until...i found out he was sleepin with a friend of mine!..yes a freind...now him and i have been split up for 10 months...and the other woman is havein his tiwns...yes twins...what am i goin to do?...do i try and forget him...or what?...lost in the madness
 JayneDoe1956
Joined: 7/25/2005
Msg: 32
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 5:22:08 PM

But you're fvucking 30 years older than she is.

Her age doesn't make it hurt any less, and I don't think that your response was the help she was asking for.

little blue eyes, don't, please DON'T pay for the divorce...whether it be a loan or not. I have been through divorce, as many of the people on this site have been.
I don't believe that him not having his divorce yet is the reason for him not wanting to commit to you hun. If he really was "in love" with you, he'd commit. Have you ever thought that just maybe he is using his "not having his divorce" as an excuse?

I wish you all the best, and PLEASE think this one out before acting with your heart instead of your head.
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 33
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 7:41:42 PM
what ever u do dont let this guy get u pregnant.
yeah, and while you're at it; um, don't let YOURSELF get u pregnant either, eh?
you KNOW it takes two people.

and it would NOT change his mind or convince him to stay with you.
you do know that, right?!
i hope so...
 crystalise
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 34
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 8:12:15 PM
hmmm maybe you should talk to the girl in the other thread who just thinking about moving 8 states to live with a guy she met on line. [ shaking head]

You need to be independent of this person. You are relying on him too much and not taking enough responsibility for yourself and that increases your feeling of vulnerabilty which in turn makes you fearful. the fact you are snooping so much means you are massively insecure with this guy and that is whats driving you mad. So you've snooped, you've found the answers...what are you waiting for?? for things to get better? for him tochange. It wont happen as long as you are there in that situation relying on him and dependent for everything. Its just too co-dependent and that seldom works out

Stop worring about him and start worrying about you. Get out and look for a job. Move back home. Get real about life and dont look for a guy to fix all your problems. It seldom works

I do feel for you being in this situation and you probably had all wonderful dreams and romantic notions. Try to treat it as a learning experience and develop your independence without bitterness. You can do it and when you set yourself up with work and your own place you will feel really good about yourself rather than relying on this person to make you feel good and secure

DO NOT stay there. It will not improve. You cant make anyone fall in love with you. It has to happen naturally and of own free will
 crystalise
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 35
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 8:20:15 PM

. In many cases the impressions you make through email and phone conversations are inacurrate.


I would be inclined to say in some cases with this observation. But i think the phone is definitely a closer pinpointer than email. Ive met several people from the net and usually they were 85% what I thought they would be.

But anyways Im off topic [ again ]
 TechnoBear
Joined: 11/10/2004
Msg: 36
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/3/2005 9:09:32 PM

I can't go back home. Family ties are cut for good.


Is that really the case? At 20 you are still very much thought of as a kid in your parents mind, and they probably do love you. So words were exchanged! Big deal! Your parents were your age once and remember how it was for them. So, they have an idea of what being in love at such a young age is like. Without knowing more about the falling-out I'd have to guess that they'd take you back into their hearts in a second.

My eldest daughter is 16 and she was in love with a guy nearly an adult in age. I'd never met him but came to loathe him through her descriptions. I rejoice in one way because she has known love, the desperate youthful kind at that. Its hurts so good.

I was very proud of her when she dedcided on her own to dump his abusive ass. She still suffers poor kid. She says its hardest when she is with her friends and they are cuddling up with their boyfriends.

Make an effort to contact your mom and/or dad. Changes are excellent that they'll surprise you!

My heart goes out to you dear. I know it seems like the end of the world right now, but it isn't. There are many, many more end-of-the-worlds to come.

Love often and fully. Pain is life, but love is everything.

Oh, and I agree - do not get pregnant! That IS a life-ender for many.
 JayneDoe1956
Joined: 7/25/2005
Msg: 40
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/4/2005 8:32:51 PM
Wait little blue eyes, he isn't there yet hun.
 huhoney
Joined: 10/24/2005
Msg: 41
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/4/2005 8:47:16 PM
he sounds like a sexual preditor from the internet, the kind we are supposed to avoid. is there an abused women's shelter you can contact in the phone book. go there. get help! don't wait for him to really hurt you... cause its coming....
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 47
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/5/2005 2:22:27 AM
darling insomniac, do you really believe "It's kinda fun to do the impossible"?
if so, well, then, how's that snm been workin for ya so far?

oi. just oi, indeed.
 Liath
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 48
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/5/2005 6:29:25 AM
First of all, you CAN'T make anyone fall in love with you. Secondly, leave that guy. If he can't see what and who you are to him by this time;-go.
You're young , find someone who sees and accepts you for who and what you are, flaws and all.No one should be anyone's slave ,mentally or physically, and that's what you've let yourself become. Walk away and don't look back!
 AnGeLbEaNz
Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 51
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/6/2005 4:49:40 AM
when anyone really knows the answer to this question...plz let me know...i have't been able to find the answer yet...lol
 Hill_Valley_Hick
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 52
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/6/2005 7:53:48 AM
To the OP, I know this will go over like a lead balloon but this guy doesn't love you. He likely isn't even attracted to you. he is just using you for sex and he probably isn't even good at attracting women he just takes ones who are desperate enough to go for him. You should move back to Canada its way better up here and ditch that ***hole. Have some respect for yourself if you don't then no one else will. You can never EVER make someone fall in love with you. Attraction is not a choice remember that. Anyways everyone reading this probably thinks im an ***hole because what i am saying sounds mean but it is true. Get rid of that guy you can do so much better.
 snowbird1111
Joined: 5/15/2005
Msg: 55
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/6/2005 9:50:17 AM

You do understand, I hope, that as your illegally here even if the two of you marry you can still be deported, and face a ten year ban from the States?




Not true... a Canadian can be in the U.S. for 6 months, well 5 months 30 days, on the day on the 6th month they have to touch Canadian soil in other words get back to Canada , then they could be back in the States after that, for another 6 months.

Even after marriage you could only be deported if you worked there illegally before the marriage
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 56
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/6/2005 10:01:27 AM
Also … because of NAFTA .. there are many ways for a Canadian to work in States.
 shadowgirl
Joined: 10/23/2005
Msg: 61
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/6/2005 11:46:33 AM
I would like to add my two cents here to the original author of this post- a man can be a snake if you let him treat you bad -he will.. One can not make anyone love them and if the environment or atmosphere brings more dis harmony then positve things-chuck that one in the trash before you get hurt anymore- giving too much and recieving little is unpleasant.
don't try as hard and maybe something will happen. I found from experience the man wants to do things for his lady too-so don't grant him everything on a silver platter, he may want to take the role of providing a few things too. Moving there all unprepared and not checking some resources or outlets or even jobs may have added to your demise. Now you are dependent upon him 100%-the ball is in his court-the cards in his hand. You knew he was on a dating site and was searching when you met him. I did everything for a guy I didn't even live with once-he took full advantage of that-now i am hesitant to oblige a man if he can't ricroprocate any inner sensitivity towards my needs.he has it made-and my family would disown me if I went and ran back to him too.they seenmy anquish-my remorse and my loneliness. Did this man tell you not to work? then if he didn't by all means -drop what you are doing and go get some support for yourself. the same old saying-"I care-but i don't know about love yet' now that just bites huh? if you need to get back to home and ya can afford part of the way -do it. if not stay and work things out,I prefer not to play those infantile male games of -'you do this-I'll do that-you can't, but i can'-you are better then that right? being exclusive and not being an item?! that doesn't surprise me-he wants his cake and eat it too. and what? he can't share his personal life with you? I am a empath and which means I can read people well and pick up their energies quick-without sympathy-just my nature- I read tarot cards all the time-but I do not have to read them to tell you you need to strongly consider what you have gained and what you have lost. you are still a mystery to the man-you just met right-early in a relationship-you are wearing your heart on your sleeve-I have done that far too often it bites and I feel for you-but we are the product of our own realization-what you do will reflect on others-It is wonderrufl he can enjoy the intimacy with you and how you are compatible in the affection dept. but honestly -as k him what he truly wants so you can get on wity your life-i don't know how old this post is but I just came right to it for some reason-and there are so many opportunities out there you can't be just stuck-an old person would love to have your assistance and help-if you are able to aide him why not help someone whom appreciates it more.? I have a neice that lives in Oregon-it is a beautiful place indeed. Has he showed you any sites/ or are you tucked away at home where no one else can share in your joyous relationship.?I don't mean to be so shrewd but I have a common understanding of the affairs of the heart. Love is eternal and never fades but you can't force it-just like the essence of time. I hope for your sake things work out but I can tell you I have been there in your very shoes and it was frustrating-the signs are clear cut too.do not feel he is the only way to survive- Get out there and see the sites and check out the towms history-then you will know if you truly belong there. get in touch with the nature of your soul and you will find the answers there.wishing you the best as I am not here to judge or decide if ones profile is just a wierd sense of humor or not I hope it all goes on the righth path for you and I must add if you are good at passwords you are prob. one who has posted under another name as well so he doesn't figure it is he that is referred too
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 64
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/7/2005 5:15:42 PM
it's not too difficult to see she did in fact mean s 'n m as in sado masochism, especially as
"I also really like snm....hmmm...that came out wrong. Or did it? Just a small typo...no biggy. Unless you're too stupid to catch it...then oi. Just oi." i say she got her just desserts. what say you?
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 66
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/8/2005 6:39:03 AM
Hmm....she did never return to even so much as thank anyone or comment on their advice.
because

This is her profile:

I say whatever is on my mind, whether you want to hear it or not. I'm not shy at all and I hate most people. I cheat at every game I play and if I get caught, I lie. I make jokes of everything, appropriate or not. No point in being serious about the crazy world we live in. It's rather hard to embarrass me and I make a fool out of myself on a daily basis. My favorite song is Pachelbel's Canon in D major. I'm the kind of gal that would wear jogging pants to a 5 star restaurant, then wonder why they don't serve burgers. I get excited when I get hand-picked flowers or cubic zirconia. I'm just a random _ stranger...number _486 to be exact. You can usually find me someplace a little warmer than just warm. I also really like snm....hmmm...that came out wrong. Or did it? Just a small typo...no biggy. Unless you're too stupid to catch it...then oi. Just oi.
just oi, indeed.

i think there have been many valid points made and some great advice from sincere posters,
we have all been mislead sometimes, just as we have all made mistakes sometimes.
some people garner attention with the victim role, and have learned to play it convincingly.
i too think this is one of those unfortunate and obvious instances.
any sincere op would show some common decency with at least some sort of thanks.
the two first lines of profile are very indicative, as is the heading of the personality disorder i smell from the op, and it reeks.
 Colonatv1701
Joined: 11/6/2005
Msg: 68
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/8/2005 3:17:55 PM
There's not much I can say except to agree with those who've already spoken. By snooping through his belonings, you definintely violated the trust issue and he will throw you out if he ever finds out. To quote a famous person in history: "Freedom is the will to be responsible for ourselves." (Freidrick Nietzche) Taking responsibility for your own actions is one of the signs of maturity. If you give it some serious, honest thought, you can probably figure out what it is that got your parents so upset with you....or you with them. If you initiate contact with them and TALK things out with them, going back to them is the best option. Otherwise, like the fella before me said; get a job, save your money and get a place of your own. Again this will require maturity, (not to mention responsibility) on your part because you will have to learn to properly manage your money and not just go out and blow it. Finally, like everyone else has told you, you can't ever MAKE someone love you or fall in love with you. It is true that with guys, their actions will reflect their feelings when it comes to love. If he says that he loves you but he's not in love with you, he means it and you should accept it and either go back to your parents or just be a roommate and as soon as you can, get a place of your own. Being a servant or a slave to him is not going to change how he feels in his heart. I know it hurts to face all this, but at this point, it's unavoidable. Also, if you go back to your parents home, you need to remember that it is their home and as long as you live there, you need to respect their rules and them. When you have a place of your own, that's when you get to make the rules. I sincerely hope this helps.
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 71
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/9/2005 6:29:23 AM
fake. she is faking.
isn't it obvious now?
do we no longer care?
yeah, pretty much it's moot, no matter what we choose to believe.
 blondegreeneyedgal
Joined: 4/2/2005
Msg: 72
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/9/2005 8:28:41 AM
my view is simple and to the point


you cant make anyone love you-they either do or dont,unless you keep them tied up in your basement for years lol,,a little duct tape works wonders lol jk
 ~softEDGE~
Joined: 6/12/2005
Msg: 76
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/11/2005 12:18:36 PM
I will however offer one more opinion: We are getting sidetracked here by issues such as the meaning of words and phrases. This is not a debate forum. Please do not try to make it one. It started as an advice forum for darling insomniac, but I am hardly surprised that she has not posted here again.
everyone has the right to post on a topic.
everyone, as long as they are respectful and not inflammatory.
i'm not suprised she hasn't posted again, either.
she must not have much more to share/ask/pose questions of the forum?
hopefully she is busy getting on with her life.
 catman40
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 77
How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 11/11/2005 2:48:57 PM
What I want and get never happes. I want a girl to be with me , live with me . I know I can't make someone fall in love with me . I know . I have tried . I have tried EVERYTHING . Spending money on them . Giving them what they wanted . and it still has me alone . Would a girl living with me . having sex change ? I don't know if it would . Never asked a girl that . all I knows is that I would like for her to live with me . Someone I can say " hey this babe is with me " and mean it .
 DragScorp
Joined: 10/1/2005
Msg: 79
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How do I make him fall in love with me?
Posted: 12/7/2005 7:20:03 PM
It's your life do not give up YOURSELF for anyone else.
Communicate with him, let him know how you feel NOT THE GALLERY.
Be strong and know this: You have to do it or you will lose your mind!
You might lose this guy but was it worth it anyways.
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