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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 SHE-DEVIL-36
Joined: 7/28/2004
Msg: 71
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....Page 6 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
MARRY ME DEAGLE!!!!!
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 72
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 11:56:15 AM
Just teasing about the 'women being smarter' comment. Shore yet again makes an excellent point about the different methods the sexes use to approach matters requiring thought.

Personally, I believe women would naturally have to be smarter to compensate for the fact that they are weaker physically on average. Again, speaking of generalities here, I've know a few women that would lose a spelling bee to a rock. Obviously when I say 'smarter' I am refering to the whole enchilada: book smarts, street smarts, emotional smarts, social smarts, etc.

I just find it humorous how man men have never considered it possible that their wife/girlfriend might be more intelligent than they are.


MARRY ME DEAGLE!!!!!


Lmao, I'm flattered but also happily taken, thanks tho she-devil
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 73
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 7:49:53 PM
You're allowed to disagree. You're also allowed to be mistaken. It's a free country.

Like any other English word, the word "free" has connotative and denotative meanings, as well as very specific legal definitions.

When you make extremely broad generalizations about most or all men being guilty of rape at one point or another in their lives, you better be prepared to back that up. Does that mean you are a rapist? Are you guilty of the crime of rape? Have you coerced a woman to have sex with her against her will?

I don't make the definitions Molonel, I just use them. If ya don't like it, take it up with Webster mate, lol.

But for the record, this is the definition of rape that I am using when I make such 'broad generalizations about men'....

rape: To force (another person) to submit to sex acts, especially sexual intercourse.


I'm willing to bet MONEY that your answer is no. You'd rather let the rest of us carry the burden of that charge, wouldn't you?


Then pay up Molonel
I never said I was perfect did I?
Yes, in the strictest sense of the word I have raped a woman.
Not violently mind you, but I did begin sexual intercourse after receiving a clear no.


The fact is, some of your criteria are needlessly, hopelessly and uselessly vague, and fit no legal or common usage definition of the word "rape" that I am aware of.


So sue me for defamation
Molonel, I'm not the legal scholar you apparently are, nor do I claim to be.
I'm just a human being that is horrified by the number of women that experience sexual assualt in one form or another during their lives, be it rape or molestation, ok?


I think the reason you're tired of this leg of the discussion is because your endless tapdancing around legitimate questions is becoming tiresome, and I'm not entirely sure YOU even buy into all the things you're saying.


No, I grow tired of the lack of legitimate questions actually. Men seem to want to argue over minute details rather than address the real problem. Most women, when asked, will say that they have had some encounter with molestation, rape, or simply being exposed to a man's sexuality (flashed) at a very young age.

A lot of men on this thread would rather argue about how truthful women are being, the legal definitions of the words used, or the actual time and place such events happened rather than face reality....men are NOT treating women with respect on the whole.

THAT, my friend....is tapdancing.

Rape is a horrible crime. Don't water it down by putting it in the same category with acts which may or may not be violent, but are certainly not crimes, and certainly not rape.


I do no such thing Molonel. Rape does not actually require violence, perhaps this is where you are getting confused? If a man threats to hurt a girl's parents if she tells and therefore doesn't need to punch her.....is it not rape to you? to the legal system?
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 74
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 7:53:52 PM
I am a rape counselor and you are incorrect with your comment about most men raping. If you want I will go into details.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 75
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:01:06 PM
No, I'd rather you tell me why so many DO commit rape or molestation with your wealth of knowledge. On second thought, screw it....

MEN NEVER COMMIT RAPE!!!
Is everyone happy now????
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 76
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:05:30 PM
Now you are being a jack@ss. No where in my comment did I even remotely imply that. I said most men do not, and they don't.

According to TARC and CARE, out of every 100,000 males.

2,000 will commit an act of violent rape or sexual assualt (including molestation)

15,000 will commit an act of acqaintance rape (taking advantage of a friend who's drunk)

so that's 17,000/100,000 men.

So what you said is backwards most men (83%) do NOT commit rape or sexual assualt.

Now, that adds up to a lot, and I hate rapists more than anything, but don't say MOST men.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 77
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:13:51 PM

Now you are being a jack@ss. No where in my comment did I even remotely imply that. I said most men do not, and they don't.


For lack of a better rebuttle.....piss off

Some rape councelor you are buddy if you think that every sexual assualt actually gets reported. But again, you too miss the point....

It doesn't matter to me if 51% of men will force themselves on a woman in their lives or if 5% do, it's still way too damned many.

I'm through talking about rape, so save your breaths.....
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 78
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:19:06 PM
I know that. But you cannot make claims about non reports. That's like me saying I know you're a rapist because most men rape. If I have no proof of you being a rapist, I can't just accuse you of it. Reread my post, at the end I said I hate rapists more than anything so I'm not condoning it. My point was YOU can't say most men rape without numbers to back it up. If that were the case, I could start calling you the board rapist based on "what could be".
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 79
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/19/2006 6:07:28 AM

WOW! I'm not the LEAST bit surprised to see deagle admit to being
one of "those guys" that have comitted rape......I think I even suggested
it earlier on.


A tad hypocritical aren't we Dougie?
My definition of it wasn't good enough for you until I use it on myself?
And you have the nerve to say I pander, lol.


You can also see his "true colors" coming through in his last
several posts.......almost as if written by someone else.......or someone who
has stopped pretending to be the kind of person who wrote the first posts.


Nope. Still the same person here. The difference is I've run out of patience for guys that justify their sins by pointing out the sins of others. I suppose you are divorced through no fault of your own eh Dougie?


He's even talked his way out of support from people who initially agreed with him.
I hope some of the women who were so impressed with his origional post come
back to read some of them from the last page.


I can almost hear the childish glee in your post Dougie.
It saddens me that you feel this is some kind of popularity contest.
Perhaps if you spent as much time improving yourself as you do trying to discredit others, you would have a happier life?


.............I think a much greater service
could have been done had the facts not been skewed and exaggerated.


Then start your own thread Dougie
I'm curious to see how women react to a man claiming that sexual abuse is a thing of the past
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 80
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/19/2006 12:19:03 PM
Thanks for the thoughtful post Molonel. Though we will never apparently agree on this issue, I still respect you and what you bring to the forums. That said...

You can't sit on both sides of the argument my friend. You clearly disagree with my definition of what constitutes rape, yet feel empowered to call me a rapist when I apply my own definition to myself. So which is it?

By my so called 'silly statement', I suppose you refer to my saying...
"Many, if not most men will commit rape in their lives"
Correct?
By my definition, as well as Webster's (dictionary.com too), I stand by it.

The majority of murders go unsolved, does this mean they didn't happen? Of course not. Unfortunately rape is not as noticeable as a corpse.

Some other points you might want to consider before discarding my 'silly statements'...

- The statistics used to refute my comments are based on US figures of reported rapes, not worldwide.
- The US and other western cultures have a much lower rate of sexual offences than most countries of the world.
- Rape is not even considered a crime in many third world countries, and even if it is, it is rarely punished.
- A small percentage of sexual crimes are reported


You are splitting hairs Molonel. Granted you are defining the word in perhaps a more legal sense. However the key words in the definition are 'forced to submit to sex acts'. Sexual intercourse is not required, neither is violence. That is how I used the word and I am correct in doing so. If you want to call it molestation, toture, or what have you, go ahead.

The point is, whatever form the sexual abuse takes, it happens way too frequently and almost always by a man that the woman knows, trusts and often loves.

I am ashamed that after hearing a clear 'no' I forged ahead and accepted my partner's silence as acceptance. But I know damned well that many men on this thread have done the same damned thing, or worse, yet lack the courage to admit they were wrong.

And until more men can admit they were wrong, or at the very least realise it, women will continue to be victimized by men who place more importance on an orgasm than the feelings of another human being.
 SHE-DEVIL-36
Joined: 7/28/2004
Msg: 81
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/19/2006 12:50:04 PM
MARRY ME DEAG?????hehe
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 82
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/19/2006 1:16:46 PM
No, I grow tired of the lack of legitimate questions actually. Men seem to want to argue over minute details rather than address the real problem. Most women, when asked, will say that they have had some encounter with molestation, rape, or simply being exposed to a man's sexuality (flashed) at a very young age. A lot of men on this thread would rather argue about how truthful women are being, the legal definitions of the words used, or the actual time and place such events happened rather than face reality....men are NOT treating women with respect on the whole. THAT, my friend....is tapdancing. - deagleninja



It's mind boggling how women fall for his cr@p. He isn't helping the problem at all, he came on here and basically made UNTRUE claims without backing them up. He said MOST men rape, which is NOT true. Do alot of men rape according to his definition? Yes. Are a lot of men ignorant and insensitive to the issue? Yes. But that doesn't mean MOST men are like that. If you want to get a point across do so in the right way. This thread would actually be effective had he simply used the education angle moreso than the factless attack one. I agree with the OP, just not how he is bringing his points across.
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 83
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/20/2006 12:05:13 AM
Doug, I've come to the conclusion Deagle is only here to kiss a55 and promote himself. He makes accusations with no proof to back them up and attacks anyone that disagrees with his "MOST men rape theory. Like you, I never said rape didn't happen, that alot of men didn't rape, or that I condone it. But he sure knows how to twist words around. I am terrified for women that deal with rape but I'm also terrified for women that fall for his sucking up cr@p.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 84
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/20/2006 6:45:56 AM

You would think they would be smarter, perhaps your evolutionary theories are incorrect. Cunning and deceptive? Yes. Smarter? No


For the record, it's a sociological theory, not an evolutionary theory.
Second, I really don't grasp why men are so threatened by the possibility that their female counterpart may be more intelligent. You grant them superiority in the more negative department but not in overall intelligence, why? Do you honestly think that knowing facts and figures equals a higher intelligence? And even if it did, wouldn't it be more useful to be able to manipulate such a person rather than be one? See where I'm going?


True they can enjoy it as much. I would be more concerned that your statements do not reflect reality and are riddled with animosity in regards to these 'apparent' hypocrises. I'm sure I dont need to clarify further.


Huh? You agree, yet I'm hostile towards hypocrises?


I do believe you have an issue with men. Perhaps your need to defend women and exercise your chivalry is not beneficial but demeaning in nature to the very people you protect.


My only real issue with men is that most seem to believe they have nothing to learn from women. As for defending women, they don't need me to help them, they are doing quite well on their own. Of course if I saw a man using his brute strength to intimidate a woman I'd feel obliged to step in. But I agree that sheltering someone or a group of people only does long term harm. This isn't the case with my post however.

The point of my thread wasn't to enrage childish men who see women as 'the enemy', but to hopefully open the minds of a few men who like I said feel women have nothing more to offer them than a warm vagina and some culinary skills.


Alas my man, I am ashamed you represent our gender as well.


Awww, shoot.
And I was just begining to hope I could get through a responce without another personal attack, silly me....

I am honestly curious though.....
Did you guys give your teachers this much hell for challenging you to do better?
I honestly fail to grasp why thread has drawn so much hostility from men when my simple point is that women offer much in the way of a new perspective and that we as men need to treat them better. Is this so terrible?

.....................................
And for Dougie amd terrell, I would reply to your threads but they don't offer anything new, just more personal attacks. Not trying to sound mean, just being honest here. I've covered the 'many if not most men will commit rape in their lives' comment for the past three pages I believe. If you are still taking that as a personal attack on yourselves, then nothing else I can say will change your minds.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 85
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/20/2006 11:58:13 AM
I also grow weary of this Molonel, but just to set the record straight....


Mmmmm, no. I didn't call you a rapist. - Molonel


But in message 230 you said...


you're a rapist.


Perhaps you just forgot? Not that it's terribly important, we are after all human and make mistakes. It just seems harsh of you to critisize me for not using the proper legal definition of rape while making errors yourself.


Your statement has already been refuted by facts and statistics.


Where?


And repeating it in the face of facts only undermines the legitimate points you could have focused on, instead.


Again, where are these facts of which you speak?

As for focusing on more legitimate points I've made, please do. I've spent three pages now explaining exactly how I came to make my statement which is based on much more than a Google search of US rape statistics. I would absolutely love to move on.


The only people providing proof are the people who disagree with you.


I see men repeatedly complaining about my 'many or most men' will commit rape in some way shape or form comment, but I certainly don't see this proof of which you speak.


No, I'm not splitting hairs. You're being needlessly vague. "Sex acts" could include just about anything. It could be a dirty phone call. It could be pinching a woman on the ass. Or telling a dirty joke. None of this constitutes rape


I never claimed any of things were....and you know this Molonel.

You took me to task for using the dictionary definition of rape which is...

Rape: To force (another person) to submit to sexual acts, especially intercourse.

Just because you don't agree with the way it is defined doesn't mean you can be critical of me using the term as it is defined. The world does not revolve around your personal preferences, sorry.


You aren't raising awareness of the seriousness of the crime of rape by associating it with acts that clearly don't qualify


This is just an outright lie Molonel.
You are the one who first mentioned dirty phone calls, pinching a woman's butt, and telling a dirt joke. Not I. I have never even so much as attempted or implied that any of these things constitutes rape.

I'd like to believe you're just making honest mistakes because you are as tired of this topic as I am, but I can't sit back and listen to my words being twisted, or as in this case.....manufactured.


Trying to foist your guilt onto many or most of the men in this thread is not going to inspire anyone to see your point, ESPECIALLY when someone like myself reads them.


If you believe that was my intent, then you really don't get it....


In any case, I've said what I needed to say.


Take care Molonel, no hard feelings ok?
 r1terrell6233
Joined: 2/6/2005
Msg: 86
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/20/2006 1:29:14 PM
Deagle said
" I see men repeatedly complaining about my 'many or most men' will commit rape in some way shape or form comment, but I certainly don't see this proof of which you speak.


Before I speak, I would like to say I agree with your points, but not how you are presenting them.


I provided proof based on numbers that most men don't rape. You made the claim that most or all men rape and have yet to back that up with any numbers, statements, or facts. You keep saying many women don't report and that's true, but you can't assume because women may not report all cases that all men rape. I was molested by 3 women on and off (one in my family) when I was a child and haven't reported it. I've gone to bars and clubs and have had women grab my crotch, but I didn't report them either. Does this mean ALL women are rapists? If I use your logic, yes.


You keep saying "your" definition of rape. There is no such thing as YOUR definition of rape. The only acceptable definition is the one given by the law. If a man flashes himself to a woman that didn't ask for it, that is not considered rape, it is wrong and illegal but not rape. If a man touches a woman's vagina, that is not rape, it is wrong and illegal but not rape. For rape to occur there must be penetration of some sort whether it's through the mouth, vagina, or a55. The rest is classified as sexual assault or harrassment. But again, if you are gonna make these claims back them up. And use the claims to educate men on what to do or not do. How to act or not act. But don't come here attacking innocent males for the purpose of kissing a55.
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 88
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/21/2006 9:10:43 AM

And as for the alien thing, it is just to common for men to be selfish in bed. Not enough men take pride in giving their partners multiple orgasm. We are not equals at all. But that doesn't meen one is better than the other , just different.


Exactly
And our differences are our strength, not a weakness. Women tend to ponder situations....sometimes until they've run out of time to make a decision, lol. Men however want to take instant action, often without thinking things through entirely. Bring the two together and you achieve balance (sometimes)


wimmin arent any smarter . their logic is flaewed


no further questions you honor for hardhatman


IIIIIIIII MMMMMMMMM CCCCCCCCRRRRRRRAAAAAAAAZZZZZZZYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!! NOT THE CHICK YOU FELL IN LOVE W/ AAAAAAAATTTTTT AAAAAAAAALLLLLLLL LLLLLLLLL . NOW MAKE ME SOME MONEY AND BUY ME A RING MY PPP UUUUUU SSSS SSSS YYYYYYYY IS LINED W/ GOLD


So just how long have you been wearing that special helmet hardhatman?
 DeagleNINja
Joined: 9/10/2005
Msg: 90
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 3/22/2006 10:58:43 AM
Puhleaseeeeee
As if my mom, much less any woman would give you the time of day specialhatguy.
But thanks for chuckle anyway, intentional or not.

On Topic: Why do so many dads try to make 'men' out of their sons by being cruel?
 jg65
Joined: 8/10/2007
Msg: 93
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 8/30/2007 6:05:54 PM
Bluguru u had me
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 94
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Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 6/23/2008 8:31:54 PM
I'm smarter than most men I've met.

but I'm not sure it's because I'm female though... but being a woman does make one try a little harder, even at work I get half the appreciation for twice the effort that my male colleagues do. And no I don't fetch coffee (unless it's an "office run")

I've intimidated a lot of men... my whole life... and it wasn't until I got older and began meeting men who had acquired some wisdom that I felt I wasn't intimidating most. I've seen some men shocked by approaching me, I guess in a effort to "pick me up", and when I tried to have a decent conversation they just sat there stunned, and then found an excuse to slip away.. or challenge me (hahaha.. always fun). I've never been able to "play dumb".

I've also had the beautiful experience of enraging a couple of men because I was smarter, and a better pool player.

However, there are ways men think that I appreciate, and don't fully understand, well, the brighter ones anyway. The ability to tunnel vision and focus on one thing and apply single-minded purpose is a marvel. One I could never master because I think holistically.

I'm not a typical woman (in a stereotypical sense), but I think one of the major differences is that women are actually better at combining mental and emotional thought (as a whole, definitely not on an individual basis) Whereas men seem to compartmentalize their mental and emotional worlds.

This is going out on a limb but it's something that I have observed for a long time.. I truly think men are FAR more emotional than women... on a depth level. But they either can integrate that... and some more developed men can, it's a marvelous thing. Mostly they repress, because emotionality and FEELING makes one vulnerable, and our society has never taught men how to vulnerable and still be men.. or accepted it when it does occur. When men DO allow themselves to love or feel they do so very deeply, verbal ability to express that aside... and when something happens to threaten that or something goes wrong I think they feel UTTERLY out of control and like they are going to DIE. Hence the suicides and violence that sometimes accompany a breakup or the end of a business or loss of prestige or anything which hits a man deeply.. they have very few ways to process it, learn from it, heal and move on. They lash out, either at others, the world, or themselves. Women on the other hand have had a lifetime of processing feelings and having access to both right and left brain ways of thinking... and being able to do that gives one a certain sense of detachment when things go wrong.. a lot of women may SEEM calculating when what it really is is an ability to be logically emotional, in a nutshell, I think the reason for this is survival... to be able to process feelings and rationally explore avenues which ensure survival is a pretty nifty way for nature to make sure the gender carrying and caring for the offspring survive to carry on the species. However we are at a point now where the best parts of being male (planning, building, goal-oriented focus, leadership, abstract thinking) and female (emotional intelligence, social skills, holistic thinking, consensus building, practicality) can no longer be gender segregated...we are evolving socially and technologically beyond that. BUT... millennia of genetics and social conditioning does not change overnight.. and because women are, for the most part, more adaptable, they have changed faster than I think a lot of men can (consider the one track mind ability of men, a great thing, but a bit of a hurdle when looking at society and one's place in it as a whole.. not bad or wrong, it just is...and should be taken into account). These are recent changes... less than a hundred years. To expect everyone to embrace it wholeheartedly is unrealistic. It's the unknown.

I agree with the OP, some men could try harder to at least listen with an open mind. Both genders have a lot to teach and offer the other, but maybe what we are lacking is a sense of compassion, on both sides, for the very real struggles of a changing world and the effects it is having on the deep psychology and sociology of the human race. Both men AND women. Women could try harder to be less condescending and unforgiving, to lead the way gently and with respect, and not by belittling or berating.

Few women might admit this, but we are confused also...we don't know what men want, expect.. or what they are really capable of.. both bad and good.. We don't know what it is, exactly, that we are becoming... but we want to have you with us on this journey. We are both here, aren't we? Searching for one another? We don't know what you will become either... but that's part of the mystery, and the excitement of change.

Ultimately we are all human, we feel, we bleed, we work, live and die.. the rest is just details.. and if we can see each other as people first and men and women second we might, just might, actually be able to help one another..and to really love one another.

I would like to add that people like the OP exist, I have recently met a man (yes, from here) who is a masculine as one can get, yet he is also the most respectful, most loving person...and he listens, I have been blessed to meet someone who has his ego under control and who has faced his demons, and embraced his emotions. I am thrilled beyond belief to spend time with a gentleman who is also my equal, and my friend. There is no conflict between these things...and I have to give him all the credit for that, he has found the balance between manhood and equality, and compassion. He has no fear, and no bitterness. It's amazing.

Peace
 godliketoaster
Joined: 2/18/2008
Msg: 95
Are you a man that gets it? No, not sex silly....
Posted: 6/23/2008 11:47:30 PM
Agreed!

BUT

Intelligence != Common sense

I would take a person with common sense over a smart person any day.
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