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 kittybiscuit
Joined: 2/11/2007
Msg: 313
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married? Page 19 of 21    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21)
I think it depends upon the man. Also, I think in big cities it is much more common to find never married 30-somethings than not. Most of my peer group is just now starting to get married off. This started around 28.

A man in his 30-40s who has never married but has spend his 20s/30s getting an advanced degree or building a business or otherwise has built a solid career, has a home, and other signs of maturity (financial) has obviously spend his time making sure he is taken care of and any future partner as well. (I would say the same for women as well, as I certainly fit this profile).

A man in his 30-40s who is still living at home, or living with 5 roommates, still parties every night, works a crap job just to scrounge up rent and has strings of girlfriends, etc, paints a different picture--one of a guy who is not ready or willing to settle down.

Which one would you be leery of?
 singleinok
Joined: 7/25/2009
Msg: 314
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/6/2011 9:03:10 PM
Yes, it scream "COMMITMENT ISSUES!!" loud and clear.
 avatarak_
Joined: 12/8/2010
Msg: 315
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/11/2011 9:58:01 PM
I think women should give me the benefit of the doubt; maybe I'm perfectly willing to commit!
Maybe I'm just single because I'm not particularly attractive and have neither the money nor the interpersonal skills to compensate!

Ever think of that???
 LinuxD
Joined: 12/6/2008
Msg: 316
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/12/2011 7:23:42 AM

Yes, it scream "COMMITMENT ISSUES!!" loud and clear.


I guess then people who are divorced (with women initiating something like 80% of the divorces) It screams FAILURE TO COMMUNICATE and INABILITY TO MAINTAIN "TIL DEATH DO US PART" never saw or heard in there any clauses releasing you from the vows made before God and man that say you can get a free pass out if you just change your mind.

I was engaged at one point.. She did me a huge favor.. She is now divorced 3 times and on her 4th husband...pretty much cured me...

just sayin
 ComplekCity
Joined: 1/17/2011
Msg: 317
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/14/2011 11:04:07 AM
Some women may wonder what's wrong with me because I've never been married.

I would hope that most wouldn't automatically assume something negative like committment issues .

I would love to make a committment to the right person !

Some people just aren't lucky enough to meet the right person. Those same people, like myself ,aren't willing to get married just for the sake of it.

Almost makes me wonder if I'd have been better off to have gotten married/divorced in order to seem more "normal"
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 318
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/15/2011 9:25:45 AM
~OT~ My SO is 38, never married. I'm not the least bit concerned about that. He's never asked me about my former relationships except in general conversations re: my son (in which there is a Father that has come up in the context of those conversations.) He's not one to be hung up on past history, nor am I. I know him today, I don't need to worry about him for the past 20 years and why he never married. Marriage is not in my future, so I suspect we won't even need to discuss that topic, since he's never been ~ I can't see that preference changing on his end. Really makes it all pretty simple. JMO
 HarDayKnight
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 322
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 2/24/2011 5:57:48 AM
If you live in the US of A today, and you aren't a bit leery of making a commitment to someone, you probably aren't paying attention to how marriage has changed in the last 40 years. People don't take their commitments seriously enough anymore.

I'd say a person who's been married and divorced a couple of times by 40 has larger commitment issues than someone who has not jumped into marriage just because society says they should. The institution is broken, and a smart person is careful of who they enter into it with... Regardless of gender.
 Wyatt Earp1
Joined: 7/15/2009
Msg: 323
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 3/29/2011 11:48:28 AM
Women are leery of every guy! Ah...except for their ____ delivery guy wearing shorts with that tanned California smile! Ya know what I mean ladies! :D
 Skotch
Joined: 5/12/2010
Msg: 327
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/19/2011 9:09:03 AM
Engaged once, she didn't seem to think it was worth working on, so it didn't work out.

Marriage is a two way street, seems kind of odd that you'd worry about it. For me, I might notice "single" or "divorced" but I never really put any stock into it. Hell, I don't really think commitment is an issue that I'd worry about until after a number of dates. I first want to know if I'm going to get along with this gal, if she's going to get along with me, etc etc. Commitment is something you work on together, not judge someone on.
 Sexy Blak
Joined: 4/19/2009
Msg: 332
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/30/2011 9:00:40 PM
No! At least not the mature women.
 happybunny8
Joined: 4/16/2010
Msg: 333
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 7/1/2011 9:54:26 AM
Sometimes I think I prefer being out of touch.....but I digress.
 Damienevil
Joined: 2/22/2008
Msg: 334
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/20/2011 9:29:04 PM
Since I will never get married if this bothers her then she is not the right one for me.
 JOphoenix75
Joined: 1/10/2011
Msg: 335
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/20/2011 9:56:46 PM
Yes, we are. I am a divorced woman and the first thing I think is what is wrong with him or how did he escape the programming? I am not being mean, just honest. I will tell you though just recently I reunited with a high school guy friend who has never been married. After about an hour of listening to him go on and on, just talking about himself, I realized why...very self-centered.
So, unfortunately I think most divorced women might feel that way. Not that it is right or fair by any means, because if we are divorced--we weren't exactly in a great marriage position either.
 northwildwoodnjman1969
Joined: 9/24/2011
Msg: 338
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/28/2011 5:16:30 AM

if they are , hell with them, i march to the beat of my own drummer.


Amen
 HarDayKnight
Joined: 12/27/2007
Msg: 339
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/28/2011 7:16:49 AM
Mel Gibson just paid $400 Million to his wife in a divorce settlement that also includes half of future residuals for every film he made while still married to her. That still leaves him with a sizable fortune. Plenty of regular guys have to live like paupers after a divorce. Marriage has become a means to a financial end for too many people.

I'm leery of women who've been divorced. (Especially those who have been through multiple divorces.) Probably even more leery than women are of men who have reached certain age markers without having been married. I can see why "some" women would be less inclined to date men who are lifelong bachelors though. Strippers and prostitutes probably tend to avoid customers who aren't easily separated from their finances, as well. Not that I'm a rich man. I just can't afford to marry the wrong woman.
 PTRIOT1
Joined: 10/5/2009
Msg: 340
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/28/2011 5:55:56 PM
C'mon. How can you possibly equate job experience and getting hired for a job to being married and/or having kids. Last time I checked, just about any idiot can crank out a kid, and it takes about 15 minutes to get legally married. You don't even have to be able to read the papaerwork for God's sake. Any 16 or 18 year old can do that, depending on what state you live in. As a general answer to "Why aren't you married yet...or have kids," how about that you answer, "Because I haven't met the person that is everything to me yet." Or you could always say that you didn't want to crank out another kid like any welfare rat, and you know what Birth Control is. I'm 42 and no kids/never married for precisely these reasons. I'd rather be on my own than miserable with someone else just because my biological clock is ticking.
 PTRIOT1
Joined: 10/5/2009
Msg: 341
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 12/28/2011 5:56:52 PM
My, you are a delicate little flower. Been out of your apartment lately?
 greenIsis777
Joined: 3/14/2012
Msg: 343
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/1/2012 1:19:48 AM
I don't think it's weird at all. In fact, I usually would not be interested in a 30 smthg male that had been married. It makes me wonder if they were needy, looking for something to fulfill them back when they are married, or whatever. to me a guy who has not been married/has no kids shows he is responsible and his college days are behind him. plus he doesn't have that baggage. bonus!
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 344
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/1/2012 4:58:49 PM
My good friend was 47 when he got married, I don't think he ever had a relationship that had lasted more than 6 months before that.

But funny thing, when he was dating we were all three out together at a lawn concert, when my friend went to get drinks his date asked me if he had any problems, why was he free and single at 47? Told her he was shy, didn't talk a lot and had been looking for the wrong sort of women in the past.

They got married and are quite happy 7 years later.

I think 30 is too young to be leery but over 40 women do wonder why you have never been married.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 345
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/1/2012 5:46:58 PM

You figure by this point there would be at least ONE marriage in their past.



You figure by this point there would be at least ONE marriage in their past.


I believe what she is saying is that she is leery of anyone who waits to do it right the first time.

If I find a woman who has no divorce or children, I feel on top of the WORLD. She's probably got her sh*t together, in most ways, and is "able" to live a healthy and vibrant lifestyle. The ONLY women that likely have her beat, after going through divorce or babies, are those exceptions who worked real hard and smart OR those who raped their spouse for all kinds of support and alimony. <---I'd rather not become the next meal for "those" ones.
 wildlifelover1979
Joined: 2/11/2011
Msg: 346
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/2/2012 3:08:55 PM
Most women just care about their college education and careers that it is so hard for any man to get a woman to settle down and marry. Plus they are so picky and today's women expect you to be physically attractive or they won't even get to know you better.
 tenn1527
Joined: 6/1/2012
Msg: 347
are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/4/2012 9:40:07 PM
I don't really care if women are leery about men in their thirties with no children. I don't want to be the guy that only gets to see his children every other weekend and holiday. I'm just old fashion I guess, or maybe it was the foundation I grew up with. My parents met when my mom was 13 and my dad was 15. Were married 4 years later in 1970, Had their first child in 1976, and are still together today. I guess my biggest fear in a relationship is that I will have what they have, and I want my children to have the same stability that I had as a child. s that too much to ask?
 forum_moderator
Joined: 1/24/2003
Msg: 348
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are women leery of guys over 30 who have never been married?
Posted: 6/16/2012 5:54:28 PM
Thread closed as users don't seem to understand what "post on topic only" means.

Please go bicker elsewhere.
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