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 amberbrechey
Joined: 5/25/2005
Msg: 3
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?Page 2 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
well a sure way oh knowing is you never go out in public with him ,
 carguy33544
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 13
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/15/2005 7:38:49 AM
Hi ladys, I have been reading all of this and you all have valid points. You said that he is a trucker so I take it he is gone most of the time? I use to spent a lot of time traveling or being away from home for work ( not anymore thank god ) but my point is after driving for several days I can see how he would have things to do at home to get ready to leave again or just up keep around his house, but has he ever invited you to spend time with him at his place?
You should not always have to go out somewhere to enjoy each other company if he is truely interested. I am sure that if he is spending all that time driving by himself that he would enjoy to have someone by his side to talk with joke with or pinch your but and chase you around the house, LOL. Being in preson is much better then on the phone or online.
As for the BRB thing when talking online a lot of times guys have to think about the questions before giving answers, It dosent meen that they are talking with someone else and if he is, he should tell you that.
My son calls me all the time and I will stop just about everything to talk with him but I always let the other person know what is happening that is a matter of respect. If the BRB thing or delays is happening every moment he mite be talking with someone ask him if he says no and you find out he is, you dont want him anyway. Then again he could be doing house work. LOL either way he should tell you.
I would say just ask him. Ask him how he feels about you and what he is looking for. If he is honest and sencere he should tell you.
 wilddriver4u
Joined: 11/14/2005
Msg: 16
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how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/15/2005 8:39:47 PM
wildgirl, wildgirl, wildgirl... i dont even know where to start with this, i am surprised that you're surprised that he is treating you like a doormat. Right there in your opening line you say that "nice guy's finish last" so to me thats going to take all the "nice guy's" outta the equation of you meeting a partner so what you have left contacting you are the azzholes that are left...lol... surprise, surprise, surprise.... i'm NOT hating on you or anything like that but you let a guy treat you like a doormat i do believe a doormat you will be but thats just my thoughts on it... i did get confused reading it on that last post because it sounded like you have not met this guy in person yet on the first post you were shopping for cell batteries at walmart, i got lost there somewhere... anyways best of luck to you and everyone else on your
 wilddriver4u
Joined: 11/14/2005
Msg: 18
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how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/15/2005 11:11:21 PM
i have to third that one as well onehelluvawoman... i need to learn how to bring quotes up from other people like that, i'm still qite new here but i'll get it sooner or later...
 HaveYouMetHayden
Joined: 12/17/2004
Msg: 22
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how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/16/2005 6:37:27 AM
A delay in msn is a pretty crap idea of a guy playing a few girls. I have my best mates on here, from the ones i hang out with reguarly to friends overseas. Plus there was the stated possibility of housework or other things.

Amberbrechey is pretty spot on too. And an angel!

A general lack of interest from guys suggests they aren't that keen. As far as i can tell it goes for women too, but they want material things as opposed to sex more.

Wildgirl, based on what you have said, this guy sounds pretty genuine. Hope it goes well for you when you do meet him!
 marathonman11x7
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 23
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/16/2005 8:03:30 AM
Hello ladies,I would like to make some input. Sometimes its not the men that play women but the women who play THEMSELVES. The same thing is true in reverse of course as woman often play men.
More to the question "how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?"
When She/He
1)never or RARELY wants to go out in public with you especially not in his/her neck of the woods.

2)Is uncomfortable answering probing questions about whatever comes to mind(shy is NEVER an exccuse for not being open and honest) If she/he doesn't want to answer questions that have NOTHING to do with financial info but are about the OTHER aspects of living....you should If you don't and you get played,you play YOURSELF

3)Is unavailable when you want them or need them OFTEN....again;

4)She/he has time to go to YOUR place but not to invite you to theirs because of being "busy" again; RUN! If you don't and you get played,you play YOURSELF actually,if you fall for that once,you've likely played yourself

5)In internet dating, if SHE/he is often on POF while often INVISIBLE on OTHER messengers...you may be dealing with a player.

6)If you have questions about their behavior and they attempt to place negative "blame" on YOU or switch focus to you....you might be dealing with a player.

7)If there are ONLY certain hrs in which you can call or if you NEVER can call;you might be dealing with a player...my advice;RUN! DON"T LOOK BACK!

8)They separate sex from "relationship" even in conversation...have relatively recently(in dating history) DEMONSTRATED a willingness to engage in no strings type of sexual relationship.

9)Want SEX before commitment to monogamy

With ANY combination of these things.....you MAY be getting played,the question then is are you DESPERATE and unbalanced enough to accept it?

Outside of avoiding the previously noted pitfalls,People can AVIOD players and being played by;
1)Asking questions early,ask ANY and EVERYTHING that comes to mind,including about relationship,dating and sexual history.A lie told early will likely be forgotten by the liar and therefore will come out later. Because of this players(and OTHER insecure people) HATE to be asked lots of questions.Besides,OPEN and honest communication is key to ANY good relationship.

2)Wait at the very LEAST a couple of months (after meeting face2face)before having sex....yeah yeah yeah chemistry happens...and good sense does also! IF REAL chemistry is there,it won't leave because you wait before having sex.(makes bonds and intensity for sex stronger and better also)

3)Observe,watch to make sure that actions meet words. This takes time,which is all the more reason to WAIT before having sex. If you don't and you get played,you play YOURSELF
 Guess_Who_Is_Talking
Joined: 11/14/2005
Msg: 25
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/16/2005 10:11:53 AM
[having empty condome packages (that you know you didnt use)]

Ha! If after finding empty condome packages you know you did not use you need more proof of him/her playing, you deserve to be played. Not many people walk around or keep other people's used condoms.

All other points mentioned by all of you are valid, but besides being a "player" they can simply mean...to quote that famous book EVERY WOMAN and MAN should read:

HE/SHE IS JUST NOT INTO YOU THAT MUCH!!!!
 grplaman
Joined: 7/24/2005
Msg: 32
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/17/2005 2:19:20 AM
Just assume they all are-go from there. After the 4th date........you'll know-go from there.
 dolat
Joined: 11/26/2005
Msg: 39
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/29/2005 3:52:20 AM
where supose to play he or she and if playing i should to play my side and try to make win both i and __
 crystalise
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 40
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/29/2005 4:53:03 AM
When what they say... is NOT what they do...consistently

not taking you out in public [ only at 'your place']
not [eventually] introducing you to people he knows
becoming 'suddenly' unavailable and not contactable
you dont have his work or home number and its been a couple of months
you only ever see him at night
he stands you up more than once
you dont know his last name
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 41
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how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 11/29/2005 5:13:34 AM

I met a man thru the on-line dating scene ...We talked for about 7 months...over the phone...talked sometimes 2-3 hours at a time... I would travel by bus all the way to South Dakota...he was coming back with me to stay a couple weeks,...BUT did not get inimate ...soooo now the 2 weeks is up...he goes back to South Dakota...I'd heard from him 3 times since June......I just don't get it


You don't get it? You talked for 7 months, you stayed at his place, he travelled and stayed at your place and you were not intimate?

There was nothing there, Spiritofthewolf. Either he wasn't attracted to you or he was and you refused his advances but, either way, the magic was missing from one of you. If there was no sexual drive then what would happen a few years down the road? I would say you are lucky no relationship came out of it. I doubt it would have lasted.

To the OP (wildgirl_5): If the person does not make time for you then there's nothing there. If his ball game and his friends are more important than seeing you then don't waste your time with him.
 mthomjmark
Joined: 2/27/2008
Msg: 72
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 4/25/2008 6:54:03 PM
1. do they keep their friends and casual friends away from you.

2. you dont go to family functions.

3. they flake a lot and cancel on you;

4. they seem distant

5. catch them lying

6. they get mad if you question them
 army3
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 82
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 6/15/2009 8:35:26 PM
Well, look for big red flags, like certain times of every day that he can't be reached, not fothcoming with address, dodging around like they are hiding something....... the usual stuff is what nails them to a wall.
 Sweet J-me Baby
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 83
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 6/16/2009 1:25:00 PM

If you can't tell then he/she must not be doing a very good job of it.....


Actually, I think the exact opposite is true. With a really good player, you won't know...until it's too late and you've already fallen for him.
 cherryyblossom
Joined: 7/19/2009
Msg: 89
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 1/31/2010 6:31:26 AM
one way to find out someone is playing on you is what they want to do on the first date and how they talk beforehand. when i was to go out with a girl, she wanted to do so many things that i thought were not good first date ideas, but I went ahead with it anyway. She also said things that sounded like a scammer. to confirm my suspicion, she canceled on me at the last minute, disappeared off the face of the earth, and deleted her online profile. she was like rushing and not going at a slow pace. that could be a sign of a player.
 carmensimone
Joined: 6/24/2009
Msg: 91
how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 1/31/2010 5:02:59 PM
1. Never taking you out, just to bars to get yo drank on
2. Always trying to get sex
3. Not calling much...
4. Not answering your calls
5. Not taking you to any special events
6. Sending you to voice mail.....oh that goes with #4
7. ONLY CALLING AT NIGHT
8. Fake smiles and laughs ( yes you can tell)
9. Walking out the room to take a call
10. NEED I GO ON? I'm tired of typing
11. Telling you how much they really, really, really like you..far to soon
12. So what if you meet his mom...that could be a playa move. ( I knew a guy that took every girl to his mom...it helped his sex life)
 Liveforadventure
Joined: 1/6/2010
Msg: 92
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how can you tell if a guy or girl is playing you ?
Posted: 2/1/2010 3:01:01 PM
Happened to me tons of times that I just gave up.
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