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Show ALL Forums  > Single Parents  > So, am I dead in the water?      Home login  
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 missq4ever
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 17
So, am I dead in the water?Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)

I dont care what anyone says. It's still harder for single men to find women than single fathers. A girl just opens her legs and invites a man into her life. A man on the other hand has to compete and play games and try and convince the female that he is the alpha male. No in fact i just met a nice girl today at school talked for a while. Mentioned i had a child and she gave me a false email. Talk about pain i have so much love to give without even depriving my son for one second. Try dating a girl for 3 months and fall in love and find out at the end of it all im not what she wanted. Well if I didn't have my son i bet i would still be with her today. Give me a break women you have so much support and so many guys probably emailing you. I put kids into the picture it scares almost all of them away except maybe the ones that have children already. Single Parental Men Hat's Off to you. You know it's pretty tough sometimes not having anyone to be with or talk to after the child goes to bed. It took my x like 2 months and already she had a boyfriend and another child. Give me a break. Single fathers have it 10 times harder.


Even before I got pregnant, I dated a couple of single dads. I wasn't afraid of the kids (even when one of them is only 9 years younger than me) and ya know, they knew I wasn't afraid. In fact, they gave me more respect than they gave their own father. I may not be part of that family now, but I'm still friends with all of them, even the father. I don't think it was an aversion to taking care of another woman's children (she was out of the picture) I was just having a bad stretch in my life.

I definitely would date a single father... if one would talk to me and not mind that I'm 7 months pregnant.
 yippikieyay
Joined: 7/3/2005
Msg: 18
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 10/17/2005 7:45:51 PM
So all that stuff about 'Sleepless in Seattle' wasn't the God's honest, cross-my-heart-hope-to-die-stick-a-needle-in-my-eye truth?


Dang.


I'm shattered.
 missq4ever
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 19
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 10/18/2005 11:07:22 AM
That's what I'm seeing too. It's not like I'm looking for a "Daddy"...
 mcbobly
Joined: 8/28/2005
Msg: 20
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History
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 10/18/2005 6:52:48 PM
Sorry, can't post I see, saw someone else posted here, I'd better leave before I get accused of following again. Good luck you all.
 dewsbury9
Joined: 9/3/2005
Msg: 21
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History
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 10/18/2005 8:18:42 PM
With regards to the who has it harder question, I also think a lot depends on the situation and reasons behind single parenthood. Although a lot of stories may be similar, there are always differences, and i doubt that any of us single parents planned for life to turn out this way - you just have to deal with it.

I for one am a single mom of a great 2 year old, but that aside i have dated single dads both before I had children and since - i think alot depends on the type of person you are looking for.

A
 missq4ever
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 22
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 12/23/2005 2:14:29 PM
Well, I had my baby. I had a beautiful baby girl and named her Elizabeth Gail. She joined us on December 8th at 4:37 PM. She was 7lbs. 12 1/2oz. and 19 1/2". If you'd like to see pics of her, she's at www.mindygriffith.com/elizabeth.htm
 JuJuBee
Joined: 1/24/2004
Msg: 23
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 12/23/2005 7:13:19 PM
MissQ,

Congrats on your new baby! Aren't they wonderful?

Single parents often bemoan thier fate, but I wouldn't trade it. We may not have "all", but we don't need it. We have a roof over our heads, food in thier stomachs, & all the love we could ever dream up.

I dated a single full custody father of two that had wonderful children. They were a fantastic package as a threesome & we also remain friends.

It's only as hard as you want it to be, eh? Depends on the outlook of the person.

Ju
 nohopeleft
Joined: 8/27/2006
Msg: 24
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 11/8/2006 1:26:26 PM
i totally agree i am a single mother and i have the hardest time finding anyone cause most of them as soon as i say that i have a two year old the stop talking to me and even leading me on i'm afraid to get into a relationship now because the simple fact that i have a young child that gets attached so easy well that is what i think and how i feel
 SONG__
Joined: 1/5/2005
Msg: 25
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 11/8/2006 7:59:03 PM
"Next question, do you think it is possible to keep kids and dating seperate entirely? Anyone tried this?"

I've tried it and I preferred it that way. I've dated since my kids were young, but never have I introduced them to any of the dates until and I was sure of the man. It was "MY TIME" to be a woman without having to deal with getting someone involved with my kids. As a divorsed mom with two kids, who held down a 40+ hour job, ........well, as in other forums, I needed time to destress and be "me". It made me a much better parent the rest of the time. I not only worked at the office, but at home as well. I had no help to do the laundry, the shopping, the cleaning, the maintenance that goes with homeownership and cars, so I did it. Yeah I know, I'm called the Handywoman....LOL, but those times when I got to go out (at least once a month, twice if I was lucky) I had fun and didn't feel guilty about it at all. Later on when the kids were in their teens, if I met someone that was going to stick around for a while, great. Then the kids met him, I didn't push the "daddy issue", and when we went our separate ways, it was all good. I have remained friends with the majority of men I dated, and the kids still say hi to them as well. Can't have too many friends, can we? It seemed to work out fine all around.
 missq4ever
Joined: 8/31/2005
Msg: 26
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 1/29/2009 11:43:23 AM
I have a 3 year old and a 1 year old. My 1 year old already has a daddy she loves very much... I'm not looking to replace him in her eyes. My 3 year old, on the other hand does need a daddy but I'm not about to push a guy I've just met into that position. Any guy I date will know from the git that I have 2 children and they come first in my life. If the guy decides he WANTS to meet my kids then fine but I will be very suspicious for a while about his intentions.

I do understand that some men want kids but can't have them. But that doesn't mean they should target single mothers. If you meet a woman, whether she has kids or not, and you can connect with her spiritually and emotionally (not necessarily physically), and if she loves you, she'll be willing to do whatever she can to help you have a child.
 kevman007
Joined: 1/12/2009
Msg: 29
So, am I dead in the water?
Posted: 1/30/2009 2:55:55 PM
You're pushing yourself too hard. I am not sure what kind of issues your son is having, but he is your priority. If the right girl comes along, great. If the wrong one runs away, that's even better. It's tough being a single parent. I think you should keep girl friends and kids seperate parts of your lives for a few months. First you need to get to know her, then she needs to know what your son is like through your eyes. Then if you think she is a keeper, then you introduce them slowly.
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