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 laserman
Joined: 8/25/2005
Msg: 63
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...Page 2 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
Well I would suggest changing the word guy to guy/ladies. Both sexes are guilty of doing everything talked about.

Why? Well I would suggest many reasons...game players, lookers but not serious, still shopping and found someone else, talks about honesty but really does not know what it means, wife or hubby caught them, scared, commitment issues, mental issues, lack of manners, and well the list can go on and on.

Be true to yourself. Do only what you feel you can live with. It is their right to be wrong and screwed up and our right to look the otherway and move forward. Never let them hold you back.
 marathonman11x7
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 69
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/10/2006 6:02:07 AM
Shuana, you have leared a valuable lesson. Quick "love" may happen but its more of a fairytale.The reality is to say the words for the moment to enhance the moment. Quick love simply is most often fleeting and most often not real. ITs more about the moment and sex than anything else.Unfortunately most get them confused because they have sex even quicker. Wait on the sex,develop the RELATIONSHIP and you will have a MUCH MUCH better chance at developing something REAL. Better to learn this at 22 than to be foolish enough to go through it at 32 or worse 42. At 22 is simply youthful mistaken judgement, at 32,42,52 it seems to be more mistaken judgement due to desperation JK
Just be mindful to develop a REAL relationship long before having sex and instead of misfortune you'll be much more likely to experience fortune.
Its not really a male/female thing...its a common sense/wisdom thing.

Ok..sorry, I read your op but not some of your later commnets.....HE MADE YOU SLEEP IN THE CAR?!? That was NOT a CLUE.......it was a SLAP! I'm sorry, the issue is about SELF- Esteem.......if YOU don't VALUE and LOVE yourself..........its hard to see the immitators for what they are. You've GOT to EXPECT ....no....REQUIRE MORE! Don't expect someone to give you what you don't give yourself. My advice is to take time off from dating and date YOU. Pamper YOU! Learn to LOVE YOURSELF the way you want and need to be loved. Find out what you REALLY want in a mate and then ONLY look for those qualities. When you Do begin to date,ASK questions EARLY and OFTEN. Develop a REAL RELATIONSHIP long (monthS)BEFORE having sex. I wish you well.
 redviking
Joined: 6/16/2005
Msg: 74
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/16/2006 1:42:38 PM
Sometimes you meet someone, and you really like somethings about them, but you're unsrue about others, or you find out things about her as things progress and you start to question whether she's really who you want be with.

If you're talking weeks or months-for the love of god, it's dating!!! The whole point is to get to knwo her and figure out whether or not she's "the one". Sometimes that answer is clear, sometimes you gotta run the clock a bit, and learn more about her before you decide.

Now, if you've been w/someone for years and they suddenly change tehir mind (without any makor changes or screwups on your part), that's messed up and immature. But really- after a few weeks or months? Guess what- he just decided that despite all your good qualities, you've got some negative ones as well that he doesn't want to live with. Be thankful he's amture, secure and unselfish enough to actually end it after weeks or months instead of ignoring the issues for years. Also keep in mind how many men you've probably rejected in your life, be it right at the start or later... men DO have standards, wants, and needs to ya know.
 beck12
Joined: 12/28/2005
Msg: 75
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/16/2006 2:52:16 PM
I think that the answer to your question lies between your legs.You put out and he took it thats all he wanted.So dont be suprised when he calls you back in a week or when hes horney again.
Beck
 wiserd
Joined: 5/11/2004
Msg: 80
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/16/2006 6:28:46 PM

"make a guy wait for it for at least 2 months, if he's worth it he'll stick around if not he'll be gone and u would have lost or gained nuthing."


Yup. Good advice.

But what do you mean 'always?' Has this happened before?

It's good to be kind (people can be so hostile to each other sometimes), but coming across as too weak or needy can cause problems. One thing that even many guys have to learn the hard way, trading self respect\self control for love is just not a bargain you can make. If you give up one, you'll also lose the other.
 ZarinaZ
Joined: 11/15/2005
Msg: 84
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/17/2006 3:04:12 AM
Not all nonsense....my ex is in Iraq...yes my heart is broken..I hurt him and now he won't let me back in...he too has issues with commitment, otherwise things would be different today. I am not clingly...especially in his situation it is easier to push love away...for many reasons..one not holding me back while he is gone for a year or more..idk..i think she should dump the guy..love is too precious to waste or throw away...to hard to find in the first place.
 ZarinaZ
Joined: 11/15/2005
Msg: 85
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 1/17/2006 3:08:12 AM
so so true...i wonder...i like the dart thing though..take some agression out without hurting anyone...lol. I truly believe in the karma thing, however don't let a future potential relationship be clouded by a past idiot...not all men are the same. Though keep your heart guarded...we have too much to offer!!!
 dita1
Joined: 1/13/2006
Msg: 93
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 2/4/2006 3:47:50 PM
I liked your comments. You do have a point there. This is how people are, some of us get bored fast and buy a new video game every day, some can't help it but play with 2 or 3 "video games " at the same time...lol and some others who like to play the same game over and over, so they are ready for a commitment but this scares the others like hell. What I would suggest to Shawn is that; since you can never discover what type of person you are dating in a month or even three, just forget all the incident above and move on. You will be in the same situation probably again…. but finding the real love at the end, it is worth the risk.
 dita1
Joined: 1/13/2006
Msg: 94
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 2/4/2006 3:52:11 PM
above, I meant I liked fuxalot's comments on the second page...
 dita1
Joined: 1/13/2006
Msg: 95
to miss pinochio - a puppet on a string
Posted: 2/5/2006 12:25:41 PM
"be smart the first time - use your head and not your heart. and most of all LISTEN TO WHAT HE IS REALLY SAYING !!"
hm.. I don't know why but what stitchimage just said it looks intriguing. But aren't we taught to listen to our hearts instead of our minds? don't we have to push away the fantasies that most of the time we build in our mind when we think (but doesn't mean it's true) we are with the right person? If you allow mw I would change it a little bit from " use your head and not your heart" to "use your heart and not emotions" Try to listen the little voice that said "what he is doing to me is not right" instead of the load voice that said "OH God if I don't do what he is asking me to do I will lose him". So, conclusion; satisfy yourself first do what you really want to do, don't do things to satisfy him or anyone else for fear that you might lose them. If you lose them, means they were never yours to begin with.
 Acadian10
Joined: 3/8/2006
Msg: 102
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Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:49:41 AM
I'd ignore you cause you wear too much makeup
 reddred
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 110
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/18/2006 1:15:54 PM
Its simple, from a guy's perspective. What you need to do is, no matter how much you are interested in a man, act like it's no dig deal. EX. If he says he's going to call you tonight and doesn't.....Don't call him. Let him persue you. That way if he is bullshitting you, you aren't wasting your time either. then you just move on. Its just part of "the game"........BRIAN
 LMAN_67
Joined: 7/13/2005
Msg: 120
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/18/2006 9:43:03 PM
i agree with Tario2

I think the bigger problem is saying I love you within a month, however, that is just me.

disclaimer:i only read the first 4-5 posts


I'm still a virgin(due to never being in a long-term relationship in my entire life--people get sick of me after about 2 weeks), and he knew that and SEEMED ok with it, but apparently he went off to find himself a whore, or a bunch of whores.

well there is your answer...personally i would take the virgin ...they are more rare than whores
 coolkiss
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 121
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/18/2006 10:00:53 PM
THERE IS NO WAY HE CAN LOVE YOU IN THAT SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME... HE IS JUST TELLING YOU WHAT YOU NEED TO HEAR, TO GET HIS LITTLE WEENIE WET... AND YOU LET HIM. ... A BOY WILL TELL YOU THAT HE "LOVES YOU"... JUST TO GET WHAT HE WANTS' A "MAN" WILL TELL YOU THE TRUTH. THIS "boy" DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU...HE ONLY WANTS' TO GET HIS ROCKS OFF... HE DOESN'T LOVE YOU OR MISS YOU...TRUST ME I KNOW. WHY BUY THE COW WHEN YOU CAN GET THE MILK FOR FREE...'DUMP HIM"...DON'T BE A SUCKER
 867love
Joined: 3/16/2006
Msg: 126
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/28/2006 11:50:13 AM
the broken heart, eventually heals, but leaves a scar as a reminder. probibly wasn't love after just one month, maybe attraction or lust -which wears off quickly. sounds like he found someone else to "love" and moved on. it will hurt for a while. your young and cute so there will be plenty of suiters ready to attract your affections. dont try to analyze it, it will never make sense. just take what you learned from this short relationship and try not to get caught in the same situation again.
 Cute Windy
Joined: 3/19/2006
Msg: 127
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/28/2006 12:42:27 PM
You are soooooooo not alone. In my opinion. they start to have true feelings, and then the fear sets in. Past stuff comes creeping back, and the closeness they "Like" with you, all of a sudden becomes overwhelming, and they back off. So, give him what he needs. Don't call, email, just leave him be. He'll either realize what an a hole he's being, and be honest to himself about this true feelings, or he'll keep running away like a lttle boy. Can't run from yourself though. If it's meant to be, he'll come to his senses. If not, there is nothing you can do. It's to bad, that we sometimes give into our fears from prior things in our lives. We miss,or pass up the new, because of the old. That's to bad.





By the way..

He's online, to see if you are.. I hope you know that!
 pjsimmons
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 129
Why do guys always do this to me? Does anyone else have this problem?...
Posted: 3/29/2006 9:00:05 AM
Yea, bummer, me too, all the time, Iwish that instead of ignoring me that they would have enough guts to tell you the truth, not just leave you hanging on not knowing what the deal is. I would rather even a lie at this point, just so I know that it is over and done with. I nice polite, I am sorry, I found someon else even would be hard but at least you would know. sorry, sorry it hurts pj
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