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 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 51
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?Page 6 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
FG, That’s an interesting way to put it, but a parent/child relationship is fundamentally different than any other kind of relationship. And the reason why can be summed up in one word - blood. That’s a bond that just can’t be matched or duplicated.

What I know about the last time I was an “us” is that when “us” became “me” again - I had no idea who in the hell I was. Making one isolated compromise doesn’t seem like much. Then you compromise on something else, and you do it again, and again and again ... after a while, you’re not you - you’re us and you have no idea where “me” went or even who the hell that person is any more. I’m sure in some instances or to some people, that is good. Just not to me.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 60
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 12/6/2005 8:21:20 AM
Love is love is love.

Not true. At least, not in my opinion. For instance, let’s say I lost my mind and remarried and she had her own children. I’d never feel the same about them as I do my son. My dad has raised four of us, and only two are his biological children. My dad, as great a man as he is, loves my brother and oldest sister, but I have always been able to tell a difference in how he has treated my youngest sister and I as opposed to the other two. It’s nothing bad or wrong - I think it’s somewhat natural.

So, yes, IMO, blood is important. It may not be so important to everyone, but it is to me.


edit: FG ... but how does one become an “us?” Compromise is one of the major factors. It is inherint that when you compromise, you make changes - giving up a little part of yourself. Did I ever compromise my core values? No. But I did compromise what I was able to experience in life.. Was it worth it? Believe it or not, yes, but for only one good reason - the compromises led to producing my son. But that would be worth being put through hell on earth. As my experience has shown me that compromise and becoming an “us” produced only one benefit - albeit a substantial one - I no longer view it as something that is positive. Just my opinion.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 62
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 12/6/2005 8:59:19 AM
... and so is the life I choose, FG. Like I said, I don’t expect much of anyone to agree with me, but becoming an “us” is not at all attractive to me. It doesn’t mean I’m right, by any means. Maybe it’s the narcissism talking, but I love me and have no incentive to change anything about me.
 cuter_than_anyone
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 65
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 12/6/2005 9:17:23 AM
compatibility and humor.

and a nice behind
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 66
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 12/6/2005 9:28:13 AM

I'm not trying to change you, I could care less. I'm merely addressing the comments you've made, questions you've asked, and the topic in general.

I know .... I didn't think it was anything personal. Just trying to explain my original statement a little better.


It's not as if this is the first time we've disagreed. We disagree on everything.

Ain't that the truth
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 71
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 12/6/2005 11:20:34 AM
Well said, Deborah. June Cleaver wrapped in Jennifer Garner’s body wouldn’t be enough incentive for me. But the good thing is, I realize that, am cognizant of it and am happy with my life as is and where it will go.

We all find happiness in our own way.
 Missy
Joined: 1/29/2005
Msg: 84
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 1/6/2006 12:34:02 PM
I'm going to have to go with friendship and communication....without that you don't have much of anything do you? If the relationship lasts forever and a day as one always hopes it will (hopeless romantic that I am), once the sex is gone (yes, I know this isn't always the case but it does happen) all you have left is communication and friendship. Growing a relationship out of friendship is best IMHO. As a wise man told me recently, you can become lovers with a friend, but, its pretty difficult to become friends with a lover.
~Missy~
 uneekguy
Joined: 10/15/2005
Msg: 87
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 1/22/2006 12:27:15 PM
Definitely....compromise
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 94
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:04:17 PM
The fact it all comes toghter, and last.
 sammysalt1
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 96
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:20:44 PM
You worded that wonderfuly.
 Bandito
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 114
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 3/6/2006 8:45:18 AM
All you people are so deep

I was just thinking that it be nice to be able to share the same pizza without having to go half this and half that all the time
 SouthernCherry
Joined: 7/31/2005
Msg: 120
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 3/6/2006 11:12:48 AM
Trust....Love....Honest!
 lilsweetman2005
Joined: 12/20/2005
Msg: 125
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 3/29/2006 6:58:20 PM
I would say umm !TRUST! you have to give it to recive it
 Bandito
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 126
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 3/29/2006 9:54:27 PM
Okay...I will bite...going to get deep here

I would have to say ....space...enough space to still be "you" without feeling guilty for not being "we"
 Mani
Joined: 5/17/2004
Msg: 138
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 3/31/2006 7:50:21 AM
A relationship should make me a better person. It should complete me. The sum of the couple must be greater than the sum of each seperate individuals. That's what counts for me.
 john52758
Joined: 8/19/2007
Msg: 141
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What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 10/19/2007 4:05:06 PM
Trust, trust, trust, honesty, communication, and trust.
 Ilovehorses
Joined: 11/17/2006
Msg: 142
What is the most important part of a relationship to you?
Posted: 10/19/2007 9:27:39 PM
compatablity and feeling at ease.
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