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 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 171
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Red Flags....Page 10 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
OOPS ~ dbl post sorry
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 172
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Red Flags....
Posted: 5/2/2006 7:04:51 AM
Blue I dunno ,
Red Flag yup & explode well i'm sure it'll take the back of her head off....LMFAO
So here's another one, chating with a really nice lady, interested yes kinda sorta... both ways
she tells her sister about me & what do you know all of a sudden I'm on her sisters favorite list. She tells me about it, and it's not like i have a lot i'm chatting with so via process of elimination I figure out who the sister is, and I get a semi warning about her {be careful} She seems more interested in me than her sister or is she I can never tell {WTF?}, ok so now even though I've not met either of them yet, is there a Red Flag here? Or have my blue balls taken over my overall thought process?
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 174
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Red Flags....
Posted: 5/2/2006 7:58:18 AM
I'm sure they are both nice or so they seem but that's tabu to date 2 at a time isn't it?
I'm a 1 woman guy, now I guess it's just finding that 1.
Ok I'm gonna need a drink later or 6.....
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 176
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Red Flags....
Posted: 5/3/2006 8:34:40 AM
No I think not..Love comes in all shapes and sizes.. If it's love then there should be no barriers...
 Caspian
Joined: 4/6/2005
Msg: 190
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Red Flags....
Posted: 5/3/2006 2:41:43 PM


I always say go with your intuition (or gut feeling if you want to call it that); it'll never lead you wrong


I have to disagree with that completely. My gut let me down seriously when it told me that I needed that third helping at christmas.



Red Flag....guys who message you during the day from their public library and admit to it. Unemployed? Too broke to own a home PC?


I would say at the very least the guy needs to be commended for being honest. That having being said the things you mentioned are possible, but they aren't the only reasons possible. I had one friend who refused to own a computer - his logic was he works with them all day why would he want to have one at home. And as far as being at the library during the day he could work shift work. After having said all of this you actually heard the conversation and I didn't so who am I to be judging your judgement..
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 191
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Red Flags....
Posted: 5/12/2006 4:41:46 PM
Ok here a question I have a lady who wants to meet me. She's on & I see her as being online but doesn't read her mail from me and also after reading does not answer. All this after saying she'd be at a certain place to meet me but not knowing exactly where it is and so it seems as if there is a game being played but I'm not sure and don't feel like jumping the gun. So does this appear to be a red flag?
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 208
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Red Flags....
Posted: 9/26/2006 7:51:08 PM
good call there smartie....

I can add to this some more but perhaps I'll hold my tongue
 scotishthistle1967
Joined: 6/22/2006
Msg: 214
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Red Flags....
Posted: 10/2/2006 2:06:26 PM
SquareSpot says'Yikes, I guess the advantage of not getting any replies and emails is that I don't have to deal with freaks like that. On the other hand ... if not even the freaks reply to my emails, maybe I should take one of those "how to write pick-up emails" courses. '


maybe a red flag would be your lover sayin I'm very satisfied with you SquareSpot....and that I (your Lover)think your sooooo sexy
 SpunkyPector
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 218
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Red Flags....
Posted: 10/2/2006 4:04:53 PM
It's easy to look for the red flags cause if you're looking you will find them....Ragdoll if you can't find any then that's a great thing and I for 1 am so happy for you.....
 who_the_fox
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 221
Red Flags....
Posted: 12/26/2006 7:31:34 PM
someone who pushes for a home address before meeting

someone who won't do a casual meet and greet but wants a "date" as a first meet

demanding phone number before meeting


goddamn...do men not understand basic rules of keeping yourself SAFE?
 who_the_fox
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 223
Red Flags....
Posted: 12/26/2006 7:38:15 PM
lol


doesn't matter if they see legs, boobs or just a shot of my face

A lot of guys figure that the women here are just pieces of meat for their entertainment.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 227
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 9:55:28 AM
A huge red flag for me is meeting someone who is so intent on looking for red flags, because they have unresolved issues or are so jaded - you wonder why they are dating. These people forget to enjoy the meeting, the time we spend together and are so guarded that they cant be themselves or even give me a chance as they have their minds made up that its just not going to work out or happen or there is no point. Total waste of time and I think the biggest red flag of them all - being emotionally unavailable.
 spellingbee
Joined: 11/19/2006
Msg: 229
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 11:01:31 AM
Oh, there's a huge red flag, alright... and it's got a gigantic pair of familiar-looking mouse-ears smack dab in the middle of it.

Welcome to the Disneyfication of our world, kids... a term coined by Sharon Zukin in her book The Cultures of Cities to describe the way the principles of Disney theme parks are permeating other aspects of our society.

I like what French philosopher Jean Baudrillard says about the hidden corporate nature of the Disney company in his book America:


"The whole Walt Disney philosophy eats out of your hand with these pretty little sentimental creatures in grey fur coats.

For my own part, I believe that behind these smiling eyes there lurks a cold, ferocious beast fearfully stalking us."
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 230
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 11:22:00 AM
DCG & spellingbee - dont you think you are both a little jaded - you are forgetting about balance in ones life. Life is wonderful if you believe that it is or could be. Nothing wrong with Disney Magic, the characters or the theme park - its all about enjoying life. If I find the right man, decide to get married again and if I had the cash - getting married at Disney would be a blast.

Personally I have been married twice and I felt like a princess each time, as I was getting married to my "Prince", we had wonderful life plans, we were surrounded by family and friends enjoying and sharing that special moment with us, the wedding was the way we wanted it and each ceremony and reception provided many wonderful memories. Now we had planned to live "happily ever after", but like others on this site, it didnt happen - so what! You deal with the sh!t, pack up your memories and move along to your next adventure, your next love interest and maybe you will be lucky to find another prince or princess and live that dream of happily ever after.

Life is what you make of it, we live in a commercial environment from the type of car we drive, what DVD we rent/buy, the way we groom ourselves, and the way we behave and the "buzz words" we use. So, what do you suggest?

After reading both of your posts, I see being jaded as a huge red flag - where are the others - or for that matter - point me to the romantic men that believe in and are looking for "happy ever after", arent emotionally unavailable and are true romantics????????

update: Nanner - excellent - looks like thats where I'm going for my next vacation - LMAO
 Nanner Nanner
Joined: 12/7/2006
Msg: 231
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 11:28:00 AM

After reading both of your posts, I see being jaded as a huge red flag - where are the others - or for that matter - point me to the romantic men that believe in and are looking for "happy ever after", arent emotionally unavailable and are true romantics????????



They're all in Disney Land.
 Fort Garry Dark
Joined: 11/25/2005
Msg: 238
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Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 7:57:06 PM
Yeah, I loose out too. I knew it was comming.

 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 241
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 10:22:09 PM
Awwwww Smartie.......how could you forget the cutie guys on the first cut..........OMG girl, maybe you need a vacation out of provice - so you can come back and enjoy the wonderful men right here at home.

Guys, she didnt mean it.........see you got honorable mention on the 2nd round of draft picks.......you get to keep your jerseys....................


All in fun..................
 spellingbee
Joined: 11/19/2006
Msg: 244
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/23/2007 4:49:03 PM
Listen up lunchbox... it's a huge red flag for me that my son was forced to sit through two (TWO!) Grade 12 (GRADE 12!) English classes watching The Lion King in some educator's pathetic attempt to impart the epic themes of Hamlet to young adults. The dumbing down of our children's education is a huge issue for me as a parent and taxpayer . If Walt Disney's cryogenically-preserved head* isn't spinning right now, Bill Shakespeare's bones are most certainly doing 360's.

*Yes, I know it's an urban legend but it made for a neat little metaphor for numbskullery there, didn't it? Not that we're actually teaching kids anything about metaphors in English classes these days.
 Rockin R...
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 248
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/23/2007 11:39:39 PM
Haywiresue
Red Flags....
Posted: 3/5/2007 1128 AM
A huge red flag for me is meeting someone who is so intent on looking for red flags, because they have unresolved issues or are so jaded - you wonder why they are dating. These people forget to enjoy the meeting, the time we spend together and are so guarded that they cant be themselves or even give me a chance as they have their minds made up that its just not going to work out or happen or there is no point. Total waste of time and I think the biggest red flag of them all - being emotionally unavailable.


Haywiresue ,
I read almost everyone of your post and I must say your the most level headed and educated women and mom I have known ( on here anyways). I imagine your not too far from the same in person, thats my read on you anyway. I wish I had a mom like you. Are you willing to take in applications lol.

I was somewhat guilty of that when I redated my ex. Yeah there were some unresolved issues that decided to be swept under the rug. It was probably not the best way to start over. But then again it takes two to communicate and ask questions even though you may not like the honest answer. I am not very good at starting an argument but I do respond as honestly as I can without the swears. It always better to ask questions than latter.

anyways this insomniac better sleep. Been an insomiac for over a month now and I can't seem to shake it. err and boy does it take a toll on me.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 249
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/24/2007 8:03:41 AM
Stained Soul - thank you for the compliment, that was very kind. My attitude is pretty much the same in person as it is on the forums. That is very kind wishing you had a mom like me - my daughter would probably disagree with you on that one, some days. I'm not taking applications for more children - LMAO, but many people private message me to talk from outside the forums and my mail restrictions will allow this. So, if you wish to contact me and talk, feel free to do so, as if I can help, it would be my pleasure. I truly believe that our greatest gift is to help one another and I have been blessed with many wonderful people who have helped and stood beside me when I was not as strong as I needed to be.

I have learned that for whatever reason a person is your ex, that will never change as there is always something there to prevent you from being totally happy. Once you make the decision to make someone an ex - leave it there and dont go back, it will only hurt more the next time. Relationships should fit together like the pieces on a jigsaw puzzle, sometimes easy, sometimes not - but if the pieces do go together they will, if not then look for the right piece elsewhere.

After looking at your profile, I remember that we have talked a few times at the POF functions at Wildsides and I remember that you are a very calm person, so I dont see that starting an argument would be easy for you as I think you prefer to talk things out, which is a much better way to handle a problem. Unfortunately, many people do not know how to have a decent conversation and even more dont know how to deal with problems. We live in a world where there seems to be a need to have winner and a looser in a dispute. This mindset is very bad and our children learn this. Open communication can reduce the problems in a relationship, provided the honesty is delivered with consideration for the other person. Its one thing to tell the truth and its another thing to deliver it in sarcastic or rude packaging and hurt another person.

Insomnia is not fun, you might have a vitamin or mineral deficiency as that can cause sleep problems during stressful times in our lives - that should be a red flag for you my friend.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 252
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/24/2007 12:46:57 PM
Temp Your Kharma - you are always just full of surprises. Who would have ever thought that you would turn out to be just the sweetest nose picking match maker on this site. Thanks so much for your suggestion, might just have to look into that one.

I could not agree with you more about many red flags being subjective, just like dating. I also agree that we are all products of our environment and not necessarily screwed up to some degree. What is the measuring stick or the norm and who decides what is normal?

I'm sorry that you pick your nose, do you need therapy or do you suffer from a compulsive disorder? On another note, do you see your nose as half full or half empty at any given moment. Sorry, just kidding here - just could not resist - you are way too funny. Thanks, you always make me laugh. All in fun, I hope no offence taken on your end.
 Rockin R...
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 254
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/24/2007 9:08:27 PM
haywiresue

your right I am a non confrontational person yet I do have temper and prefer to wait for 3 strikes to say something. Usually as strike one I am pissed and I would probably say some shit and swears that I would regret latter on. My motto its best to say nothing at all if you have nothing good to say. By then I wish someone would notice and ask whats wrong so I can say whats on my mind in a non confrontational manner in hopes in resolving the issue at hand so both parties get what they want from eachother and not fight and go to bed mad.
--------
Thanks , I will take you up on the offer. Sorry I have a hazzy memory about meeting you at Wildside, I've only been there 3-4 times, the last time I was there was for that early December chirstmas gathering. That time I showed up over way over dressed, yeah I was in a suite, lol. The memo did say to dress up?

My latest insomnia situation I thought it was due to eating a late supper and it beeing summer I usually able to stay up alot longer. Even though I always feel sluggish but that the norm for me these days. It gets worse when I am stressed. But your right I have a medical issue. On the 28th I will be getting results on my little condition. Last week I had gone to see the specialist. I got needled into the bone marrow of my chest and I gotten more blood work done. I was checked for my low pressure and checking how anemic I am.
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 257
Red Flags....
Posted: 5/26/2007 6:25:28 AM
Tempt Your Kharma;
I'm glad there was no offence taken on your end as it was all in fun. I also agree with your comment "Love means never having to say you are sorry" and that it is BS. In a relationship one must be aware of the others feelings and as humans we often make mistakes, inadvertantly hurt the other person and need to make amends and show how important the other persons feelings are as we need to caretake and look after a loving relationship. You are a pretty smart guy.

I like your big boob analogy and you are right, big boobs on a woman, just like a handsome man, gets attention - but there sure has to be more to it than that for a relationship to form, grow and endure. I think many people rush into a relationship before the understand what else these "desireable" people have to offer. I have dated some very handsome and attractive men, only to find out the lights were on and there was no one at home or we had absolutely nothing to talk about after I got past looking at the looks. OMG this is weird, I'm in agrement with you - 2 funny.
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