Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 atlast
Joined: 2/25/2007
Msg: 816
Cheating- can you forgive?Page 24 of 59    (19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59)
Cheating is the ultimate slap in the face. If a women cheats on me, that is the end. I will never trust her again. Promises don't seem to mean much anymore. If you lack self-control to the point that you have to sleep with someone other than the love of your life for excitement, your life must really suck. Fix the problem, not the blame.
 FunLovingMan
Joined: 8/15/2007
Msg: 817
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 9/27/2007 10:19:32 AM
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo
NoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNoNo

AND

No and you MOVE ON with out them

Once a CHEATER ALWAYS A CHEATER been my experience.
 ThinkHulk30
Joined: 9/19/2007
Msg: 818
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 9/27/2007 12:09:17 PM
This behavior is Unacceptable....Move on and do it fast
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 820
view profile
History
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 9/27/2007 12:42:54 PM
I've never cheated on anyone...and to my knowledge, I've never been cheated on. Could I forgive a man for cheating on me? I don't think so. I could forgive most anything, but no, not that.
 *****Covet*****
Joined: 9/25/2007
Msg: 822
Cheating - can you forgive?
Posted: 10/6/2007 5:16:15 PM
No, NO, NO! Once a dog strays thats it! If they want to test the waters thats fine and dandy but they needn't think the door will be open when they decide to come back. If they should be so lucky that the door is still be open when they do return. Don't fool yourself, they will not appreciate it and expect to get away with it in the future. Anyhow, If they were sincerely sorry, they would be disgusted with themselves and not expect to be forgiven.
 Coolgem
Joined: 9/20/2006
Msg: 823
Cheating - can you forgive?
Posted: 10/6/2007 5:22:44 PM
I've never cheated on anyone I have been with, and as far as I know , I have never been cheated on either. Could I forgive a man for cheating on me, no - never....it would be over and done, period.
 Huggles
Joined: 12/15/2006
Msg: 825
Cheating - can you forgive?
Posted: 10/8/2007 5:12:00 AM
^^^ thanks for your input OOOfirefighter.....but yes, at least I think this woman knows what forgiveness is and I'm sorry, but no, cheating is not forgiveable.

Wether in a long term relationship or married, you've broken something sacred.....TRUST.

You break that, you break everything.
 BrAt_FaCe
Joined: 8/6/2007
Msg: 826
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/8/2007 8:54:37 AM
i have been cheated on before and it is probably the worst feeling in the world. If i found out my guy was cheating i would be gone so fast. You have one chance if you blow it you have to live with it for the rest of your life. If a guy really loves you he wouldn't have done it in the first place
 BeachLover76
Joined: 9/22/2007
Msg: 827
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/8/2007 9:09:27 AM
History tends to repeat itself, its just a fact. In my opinion, it doesn't matter the situation or even I really loved him, if I wasn't good enough for him then, then forget now! I don't do second chances.
 incognito100
Joined: 6/1/2007
Msg: 828
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/8/2007 9:41:57 AM
You can forgive if you want to but I'd never forget and I wouldn't trust that person anymore.
 *Just Jim*
Joined: 7/6/2007
Msg: 829
Cheating - can you forgive?
Posted: 10/13/2007 5:53:04 AM
Yes, I think you can forgive a person after the dust has settled.

Betrayal of trust is very bitter pill to swallow !

And I'm not saying you would want to hook-up with person again but

put to rest and forgive yourself and move on.
 irish girl in mi
Joined: 7/15/2007
Msg: 830
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/13/2007 8:04:22 AM
oh no no no, giving a cheater a second chance is just opening the door to more heartache, this person didnt respect you enough to not do it the first time, dont give them the second chance to do it again, it will lower your self esteem, and your self worth.....move on there are plenty of good men and women in this world that dont cheat. good luck to you
 panicman10
Joined: 7/24/2007
Msg: 831
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/13/2007 10:54:57 AM
no you cant forget but you can forgive.i've been cheated on in every relationship from the 90s on so far!i made the mistake of giving it a chance but she cheated on me again!NEVER give a cheater a 2nd chance!once a cheater always a cheater!take care goodluck & godbless everyone.
 jaycee283
Joined: 8/3/2007
Msg: 832
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/13/2007 7:59:43 PM
No I cannot forgive a Cheater!! I am proud of my record, as I have never cheated on the one in my life.... as I see it, she has been defiled at her wishes, and once gone....
party time!!
 silentlonely
Joined: 12/15/2006
Msg: 833
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/13/2007 11:43:52 PM
i can and i have; im a forgiving person and can deal w/it and get past it or whatnot, the problem is can the other person get past it and deal w/it or are they paranoid upset- distrustful and nervous becuase of their indescretions
 1Fish2FishRedfishNewfish
Joined: 9/23/2007
Msg: 834
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/15/2007 7:51:39 PM
Forgiveness is not for the other person, but for you. Maintaining the bitterness and anger that is justifiable, but destructive, hurts nobody but you.

Forgiving doesn't mean that the everything goes on as it was before, it only means that I am not letting the poison make me sick. Forgive and move on. You may choose to move on alone, but move on.

Staying angry and resentful "is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die."
 4EverJourny
Joined: 7/28/2007
Msg: 835
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/15/2007 8:06:01 PM
That all depends on can you forgive him for cheating, or will it haunt you forever?

The next time he is late coming home what will go through your mind? When he tells you he is going out for a few with the boys will you believe him?
More importantly when he tells you he loves you, what will go through your mind?

I agree with kick his ass to the curb and find something much better. Also don't take on his baggage.
 Made~new~Again
Joined: 6/30/2007
Msg: 837
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/15/2007 10:44:41 PM
We are not dealing with dogs here. People are not dogs. From time to time we might act like dogs, but humans are not animals. I don't like that phase used when refering to the human nature or the natue of humans. I mysef left my husband because among other things I was suspicious that he was probably cheating on me. I regret that I couldn't get over my suspicions. Spouses fight from time to time. It's a shame really.
 Anaphase33
Joined: 4/3/2007
Msg: 838
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/15/2007 11:03:36 PM
I've never been able to forgive my last gf for cheating on me. I think that even if I forgave her mentally, my instincts, my lower lizard brain would never forgive her. It would never be far from my mind, ready to boil to the surface, if we got back together. The weird thing is, I have no desire for her now. As soon as I found out she cheated on me, I was no longer attracted to her. A good little trick, I guess.
 carolanne 60
Joined: 9/27/2007
Msg: 840
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 12:06:01 AM
Dear josie555,
Wow! you have many responses to your question. Can you forgive? It takes a very special person to do that. There are many ways to forgive other than to stay in a
relationship that will have future doubts for you. He or she may be truely sorry but that trust was broken. Once honesty has been replaced with lies, it usually is impossible for the other person to trust again. Can you live with this doubt the rest of your life? This will be your own decision and yours alone.
We all feel for you! Carolanne 60:
 LeoRejean
Joined: 9/14/2006
Msg: 841
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 1:23:42 AM
this is prolly old but i just saw the thread thought id put 2 cents in on it. but cheating is the most serious of trust violations. if someone can get that trust back from this situation, thats a huge step in a relationship and has to be working on both ends of the deal. if one wont agree to it then that relationship that was once based on trust can turn into lies and deceit and is no longer a relationship.
 The Little Brooker
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 842
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 5:42:27 AM
First time, yes. Second time, with stated boundaries. Third time, no.

Yes, your vows and stated beliefs do change after you experience it first hand. If you love someone, you want to preserve it.

It took an enormous bite out of my self-worth and confidence. It infected me with a cancer of suspicion. The biggest amount of work to restore your relationship belongs to the partner who cheated on you. Does he acknowledge, does he get how much he hurt you? If he's incapable of doing it, move on. You are worth more.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 845
view profile
History
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 9:05:41 AM
I would forgive...
I have forgiven...but it does not change the fact that it happened...
It's still good bye!
 The Little Brooker
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 846
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 10:06:55 AM
Nicebluiz & Idareu,
My post reflects what I did in my last relationship. I should have written more:
I understand why she may be contemplating giving him a second chance. I was very much in love with him. In most ways he seemed to be a wonderful man and ours an enviable union (also confirmed by family, friends and co-workers on both sides). His behaviour was complicated by mental illness.

What I also should have told her is that after that experience, I will never, ever again stay with someone who cheated, or even I suspect of cheating. If I find out someone has a history of cheating, I will not date them. Those with mental illness have a heavier cross to bear than most and they have done nothing to deserve it. However, I'll personally never again knowingly get involved with such.

I'm still dealing with the whole thing. This probably sounds mixed up.
 Sexy chocolate 357
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 848
Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 10/16/2007 3:29:11 PM
Do nt for give him because he is gonna continue to cheat, (trust me )would you forgive someone who hurt you, or abuse you, over and over again, if so then take him back but if not let go and move on. why should you except someone who couldnt remember you at the time of his cheating, (out of sight, out of mind) you deserve someone who will respect you at all times. there are too many S.T.d's out her for you to be forgiving someone who say that they made a mistake that could have cost you your health. THINK ABOUT IT, RATHER BE LONELY THEN SICK, AND CONSTINLY CHEATED ON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oVER ALL IT IS A FEELING T WILL PASS...... BE STRONG
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >