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Show ALL Forums  > Profile Reviews  > It's time: Brutally Honest Profile Reviews ... as promised      Home login  
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 101
typoagainPage 5 of 30    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30)
This is not a place for you to rant.
I will again direct you to msg 1, page 1.
If you don't like what I have to say, and if you don't agree with me - I DON'T CARE!!!
With respect to the "Prefer not to say"'s - I'm going to tell you right now, that for the most part, people are scanning profiles. They are not sitting there psychoanalysing your reasons for chosing "Prefer not to say." And to most people who are scanning profiles, "Prefer not to say" seems like you're hiding something.
Now, keep in mind that everyone of these people have asked me to review them, they've asked for my judgement, so keep that in mind before you go off on your next little tangent.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 102
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:26:01 PM
I'm concerned that you don't have a profession.
I think you need to add a little bit about you before the paragraph about your cooking. Individuals scanning profiles what to know you and what you're about straight up and they don't want to go searching for information.
Otherwise, looks good.
In future, remember to turn off the date stamp.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 103
indiana jones
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:31:51 PM
None of your pictures are doing anything for you.
Never post pictures with red eye, pictures which are blurry, pictures where you haven't groomed... need I go on?
Your profile: Well you're 18. I don't think you're going to capture much beyond the realm of 18 year olds. So it fits.
You don't need me. You just need someone who can take a half decent picture of you, and you need to learn how to edit photos before you post them.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 105
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:48:35 PM
I don't really understand why you've come to me. No you're not asking too much, you're asking too little.
Anyway, your profile isn't going to get you out on a date.
Your pictures... I'm thinking you've got 4 super hawt pics of yourself in your 20's and then a poor web-cam picture which screws everything up.
Your about me is very... simple.
Anyway, good luck acquiring 'friends'.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 106
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:55:02 PM
Step away from the webcam and get some decent, humanistic pictures.

Everything we can own materialisticaly and even our life can be snached away in an instant.

Sorry, what are you trying to say here? Your thoughts are fragmented and scattered, and you have spelling issues.
Otherwise, your profile is fine.
I don't think I can really help you much because you're 49. Its a very "Look at me, I'm 49" kinda profile, and though my youthful outlook may help you get a date, your not going to change what you have written because you have "wisdom".
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 107
Posted: 12/26/2005 5:03:55 PM
There's nothing wrong with your profile!
Joined: 4/9/2005
Msg: 108
Posted: 12/26/2005 11:26:29 PM

What's with your name? If I decompose it with my knowledge of French, I get: Dead Alez...

Actually it is not from french , it has a spanish sound when pronounced.

Your headline is pathetic.

Oh I thought it was simple and to the point .

And the picture of the lady in the orange shirt... I'm thinking... so, uh, where is he... and then I spotted you, camouflaged in the background.

Funny because I am the biggest object in that photo .

And don't put your personal e-mail address on your profile. Its against the POF rules and it makes you seem desperate.

Well I check my e-mail almost everyday , I come here once and a while , so i will most likey get the msg via e-mail faster .
Joined: 7/31/2005
Msg: 109
view profile
It's time: Brutally Honest Profile Reviews by Kikilynn... as promised
Posted: 12/27/2005 5:34:51 PM
Hi kikilynn!

I'd appreciate a review as well.

Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 110
Posted: 12/28/2005 11:34:18 AM
Mr. Cliche,
So, do you think that you're the only guy on POF looking for a genuine down to earth girl???
Don't wear your glasses on your head, especially now that its winter!

Hi there. I am a single 28 year old guy from the Toronto area.

No shit, Shirlock! All of that's in your general info, scrap it.

I believe that every great relationship must be based on honesty, trust, respect, mutual understanding, friendship and selflessness.

You've figured it out! Congratulations!
The rest is fine.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 111
Posted: 12/28/2005 11:54:02 AM
Okay, brotha! Lets see if I can help ya out (LoL)!
Don't use lol's in your profile!
Your picture sucks; it's blurry.
Remember to seoarate your interests by commas.

I want a lady that is open to whatever.

Read: I'd love a lady who will just get me laid. If you're an interesting person, I might stick around for pillow talk, and if you weren't a dead hooker in the sack, I'm up for a second session.

our first date will be great.

Interesting assumption since we aren't even going on a first date.

The problem with your profile is that we don't know anything about you.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 112
Posted: 12/28/2005 12:00:26 PM
I'm wondering what "the pink" is, cause on first glance, I'd think - lesbian. Not that theres anything wrong with "the pink". *wink*
You've got some good shots of your tits in there, so that can't be hurting things.
You're about me is perfect.
If you're not getting enough e-mails, guys are probably steering away from you because you're "a few extra pounds." So, I'd say get yourself a gym membership and start workin that ass.
PS. The gym is a smokin' place to meet hot guys with great bodies!
Good luck.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 113
Posted: 12/28/2005 12:16:17 PM
You need a new headline.
Don't write sentences for interests. Just keep 'em short.
Your about me just isn't working.
Don't demonstrate baggage, don't put yourself down, do build yourself up, do include a witty paragraph about you, and do include a paragraph about what you're looking for.
Try to make sure that you are using appropriate spelling and grammar.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 114
Posted: 12/28/2005 12:19:45 PM
Name: Not too sure if you don't know how to spell human, or if its a pun with regard to the hue of your skin...
Headline: Boring.
Try not to squint in your pictures.
You've nailed your simplicity right on the head. Your profile's a little short, don't you think? Or do you think?
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 115
Posted: 12/28/2005 12:30:02 PM
I promise to try to get to the bottom of your question "What's wrong with my head?"
However, based on the quantity and quality of the information you provided, I'm not going to be able to do anything here.
One problem that I did decipher is this - You're looking for "Long term" and then you put this as your first date idea:

Go out and do stuff. Most likely eat part of some dead animal. Then drink some type of intoxicating liquid, then go back to your place and F*CK like cave man style. I'll get prehistoric on your ass.

I do however, think that you can stop looking.
You say you're looking for your "biatch"... and from your pictures, I see that you've gotten yourself a dog. So, that was easy. You've got everything you ever wanted, you just didn't know it.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 116
Posted: 12/28/2005 12:41:06 PM
All of your pictures are scary, except the first one, which isn't very clear.
You have WAY too many interests listed. Keep it to 9-12. If you don't think a chick would want to date you because of an interest, scrap it. And try not to be repetitive.
Otherwise, I think you're one of those different kinds of folks, which is what you portray. Not everyone is into that. So you're limiting your possibilities.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 117
Posted: 12/29/2005 8:44:06 PM
Okay, lets get to it.
New year new you? Are you schizophrenic?
Don't neglect to wear a shirt under your suit jacket (even if it is Halloween) when you have a belly and a hairy chest.
You are NOT the international man of mystery. Mike Myers is, so don't even think about it!
Delete this:

About me, I am 26

Be careful of spelling and grammar mistakes. Remeber to use a space after a comma or period... etc...

I get so fed up going through all of these things in every review!
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 118
Posted: 12/29/2005 9:18:34 PM
Don't tell me that I have to "msg you now" in your headline. That'll be for me to decide.
Get rid of all of the pictures with the spray painted faces.
Your about me... oh God...
Your spelling and grammare are fine, but... you... I guess the real problem is you.
You're dorky and I think you know it. But the way you write definitely reiterates it to your readers.
Try to keep your profile simple and to the point.
For example you listed all of the ingredients you commonly use. Are you for real? Why the hell do we need that information? Save something for when you actually get a date!!!
(Which might not be for a while.)
Your best bet is to encourage your workplace to set up a speed dating thing or something. Maybe you can meet a dorky gal from inside...
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 119
Posted: 12/29/2005 9:34:59 PM
I'm not sure where you came up with your user name, but it sounds like plagerism of one of the Oompa Loompas from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory .
"Looking for a good woman."
Listen pal, you and the rest of the world! Come on. Get something that makes you stand out. Even I could put "Looking for a good woman" as my headline and it wouldn't be a lie, but do you see that as my headline? No, you don't.
I think you need to start going to the gym. Burn some calories. That pot really does you no justice. Simple rule of thumb for weight loss: If calories consumed are less than calories expended, you'll lose weight.

Hello: My name is Chris.

Hello, Chris! I feel like I'm at an AA meeting.

I've been divorced since April 2003
I have two children, a daughter age 22 and a son age 24.
I also have two grandchildren, a grandson and a granddaughter both age 3.

Do not demonstrate baggage.

You also have some spelling issues: believe ('i' before 'e' except after 'c', or sound it as "eh" as in neighbour and weigh), sitting (around a campfire), effort.
You have not first date ideas.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 120
Posted: 12/29/2005 11:49:43 PM
Dude. Have patience, I was getting to you. I know that you were asking me to review you, and not talking to kissingthepink... recognize that she's blond, I'm brunette. Got that?

Anybody out there still live in reality!

1. Technically that is a question and should be followed by a question mark.
2. Its not a good headline.
3. Yes, there are people living in reality. I am... not sure who's with me here...

I see that you've figured out how to adjust the brightness using the editing feature in photo shop. They're still the same picture. Chose one, lose the other.

It doesn't interest me what you do for a living.

Don't open with this. Seriously. We want you to be interested in us, and everything we do. (I know that's not what you're getting at... so you'd best fix it.)

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine

Uh, no. We don't want a guy who's a failure.

Okay, so your about me is all nice and poetic and crap, but spare me. We need facts. Cold hard facts. About you, and about what you're looking for. KISS: Keep It Simple Stupid.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 121
Posted: 12/30/2005 12:03:58 AM
that someone special and my best friend.

This is a sentence fragment and it doesn't belong here all alone.


Lose the slash.

Your profile really has no meat. Its like a couple of slices of stale white bread.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 122
Posted: 12/30/2005 12:11:17 AM
Your headline isn't catchy.
You need to quit smoking.
You're kinda odd looking.
You have fuzzy pictures.
You have a definite plan, but you can't spell definite.

I graduated 2000 and am STILL going to North Georgia, majoring history.
I pay off my debt to society for taking so long to get a simple degree.

These comments are going to hurt your chances of getting a date.
You disclose far too much and you seem like a whack job.
Good luck in the dating world.
Maybe you can pick up at the library?
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 123
amaze me
Posted: 12/30/2005 12:17:07 AM
I wish there were a way to find out what percentage of POF users are curently using the headline "Are u the one?" I imagine its in the realm of 25% which would make it seemingly unoriginal.

Otherwise, you profile ain't bad. Maybe you should consider starting your own review thread.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 124
Posted: 12/30/2005 12:32:07 AM
Your profile is... interesting.

For a first date, let's see.

Don't pretend that this is a conversation. Its not. You're trying to whew someone with your ability to write. Don't forget that.
The purpose of having a profile is to convey information to the reader about yourself and what you're looking for, and since the reader has to read it, its best if you write properly using good grammar and skill.
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 125
Posted: 12/30/2005 5:43:41 AM
Not only did I call you white bread, I called you stale. What you had before was dry and lacked substance.
This revision is much better.
Some picky details:

All of which is

All of which are

a brick sh!t house

Didn't work out... sh*t is on two seperate lines...

Christmas pic that get sent to the relatives

Christmas pic that got sent to the relatives

All in all, it looks much better. You might want to work on some more pictures. Think of a catchier headline and you'll be in business.
Show ALL Forums  > Profile Reviews  > It's time: Brutally Honest Profile Reviews ... as promised