|Favorite QuotesPage 5 of 16 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16)|
|always let your conscience be your guide . . . jimminee cricket 1940 |
right turn clyde . . . clint eastwood (every which way but loose)
shut up big nose . . . eric idle (life of brian)
Wise Man #1: Ahem!
Brian's mother: Oh!
[falls over in chair]
Brian's mother: Who are you?
Wise Man #2: We are three wise men.
Brian's mother: What?
Wise Man #1: We are three wise men.
Brian's mother: Well, what are you doing creeping around a cow shed at two o'clock in the morning? That doesn't sound very wise to me.
Brian: Excuse me. Are you the Judean People's Front?
Reg: Fuck off! We're the People's Front of Judea
Reg: All right, but apart from the sanitation, medicine, education, wine, public order, irrigation, roads, the fresh water system and public health, what have the Romans ever done for us?
Attendee: Brought peace?
Reg: Oh, peace - shut up!
Reg: There is not one of us who would not gladly suffer death to rid this country of the Romans once and for all.
Dissenter: Uh, well, one.
Reg: Oh, yeah, yeah, there's one. But otherwise, we're solid.
Brian: Have I got a big nose, Mum?
Brian's mother: Stop thinking about sex!
Brian: I wasn't!
Brian's mother: You're always on about it. "Will the girls like this? Will the girls like that? Is it too big? Is it too small?"
The Crowd: The Messiah! The Messiah! Show us the Messiah!
Brian's mother: The who?
The Crowd: The Messiah!
Brian's mother: There's no Messiah in here. There's a mess all right, but no Messiah. Now go away!
Brian: I am NOT the Messiah!
Arthur: I say you are Lord, and I should know. I've followed a few.
Reg: If you want to join the People's Front of Judea, you have to really hate the Romans.
Brian: I do!
Reg: Oh yeah, how much?
Brian: A lot!
Reg: Right, you're in.
Stan: It's every man's right to have babies if he wants them.
Reg: But you can't have babies.
Stan: Don't you oppress me.
Reg: Where's the fetus going to gestate? You going to keep it in a box?
Ex-Leper: Okay, sir, my final offer: half a shekel for an old ex-leper?
Brian: Did you say "ex-leper"?
Ex-Leper: That's right, sir, 16 years behind a veil and proud of it, sir.
Brian: Well, what happened?
Ex-Leper: Oh, cured, sir.
Ex-Leper: Yes sir, bloody miracle, sir. Bless you!
Brian: Who cured you?
Ex-Leper: Jesus did, sir. I was hopping along, minding my own business, all of a sudden, up he comes, cures me! One minute I'm a leper with a trade, next minute my livelihood's gone. Not so much as a by-your-leave! "You're cured, mate." Bloody do-gooder.
Brian: I'm not the Messiah! Will you please listen? I am not the Messiah, do you understand? Honestly!
Girl: Only the true Messiah denies His divinity.
Brian: What? Well, what sort of chance does that give me? All right! I am the Messiah!
Followers: He is! He is the Messiah!
Brian: Now, fxxk off!
Arthur: How shall we fxxk off, O Lord?
Matthias: Look, I don't think it should be a sin, just for saying "Jehovah".
Jewish Official: You're only making it worse for yourself!
Matthias: Making it worse? How can it be worse? Jehovah! Jehovah! Jehovah!
Jewish Official: I'm warning you! If you say "Jehovah" one more time (gets hit with rock) RIGHT! Who did that? Come on, who did it?
Stoners: She did! She did! (suddenly speaking as men) He! He did! He!
Jewish Official: Was it you?
Jewish Official: Right...
Stoner: Well you did say "Jehovah. "
[Crowd throws rocks at the stoner]
Jewish Official: STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT RIGHT NOW! STOP IT! All right, no one is to stone _anyone_ until I blow this whistle. Even... and I want to make this absolutely clear... even if they do say, "Jehovah. "
[Crowd stones the Jewish Official to death]
love from twinkle t!ts . . . clever kitten
Posted: 5/9/2009 9:23:19 AM
Have you any favorite quotes?
"It takes a whole village to raise a child." (traditional African proverb, I think - and so very true!)
"He's a typical boy - full of piss and vinegar." (my Mom)
Posted: 5/9/2009 12:28:23 PM
|Im the angel of your nightmares|
Posted: 5/9/2009 12:55:52 PM
|Is that a gun in your pocket or are you pleased to see me|
Posted: 5/9/2009 1:41:08 PM
|A few more...|
"Do what you did, get what you got."
"I'm not bad, I'm just drawn that way." (Jessica Rabbit)
"If you get into bed with the devil, sooner or later you gotta f**k." (an old mate of mine)
Posted: 11/9/2013 5:41:43 AM
|"dogs have owners, cats have staff" anon. "better to be looked over, than overlooked" Mae West. "if I want your opinion, I'll beat it out of you" Elvira, Mistress of the dark. "change is as good as a rest, as long as it's not a cardiac arrest" anon.|
Posted: 11/9/2013 6:52:36 AM
|Before you diagnose yourself with depression or low self esteem, first make sure that you are not, in fact, just surrounding yourself with ***holes - William Gibson|
| Jo van|
Posted: 11/9/2013 10:56:00 AM
-Because if you don't try.... You can't fail
Posted: 11/9/2013 1:41:32 PM
|'The beatings shall continue until morale improves'|
And my fav....................'Perfect Planning and Preparation Prevents P*ss Poor Performance'
Posted: 11/10/2013 2:07:00 AM
|'There comes a time when you have to stop crossing oceans for people who wouldn't jump puddles for you.'|
'Never say never'
Posted: 11/10/2013 4:49:28 AM
|if another blames you, |
you can put up a strong defence.
if you blame yourself,
you have no defence.
| Jo van|
Posted: 11/24/2013 3:03:59 AM
|"Andy Coulson has given me assurances that he had no involvement or knowledge of phone hacking, and I have accepted that. "|
~ David Cameraman, PM. 2012
Dear David, the cheque's in the post....
"Do his phone!"
~ Andy Coulson,
about Calum Best, revealed from an eMail to his news editor, during his trial. 2013
| Jo van|
Posted: 11/25/2013 10:06:18 AM
"One thing only I know, and that is that I know nothing.
The nearest way to glory is to strive to be what you wish to be thought to be.
The only good is knowledge and the only evil is ignorance.
"Enjoy yourself -- it's later than you think. "
Posted: 11/25/2013 4:04:37 PM
|"I'd rather have one at fifty than two at twenty-five" - Tartanjohnny at a POF do when 2 young things were chatting to me.|
Posted: 12/6/2013 11:28:44 AM
|Rimmer to Holly in Red dwarf "you jumped up filofax"|
Lucy Watson to Spencer Matthews in Made in Chelsea "You are a whole new level of disgusting"
Posted: 2/1/2014 2:09:13 AM
|"What is a club in any case?|
Not the buildings or the directors or the people who are paid to represent it.
It’s not the television contracts, get-out clauses, marketing departments or executive boxes.
It’s the noise, the passion, the feeling of belonging, the pride in your city.
It’s a small boy clambering up stadium steps for the very first time, gripping his father’s hand, gawping at that hallowed stretch of turf beneath him and, without being able to do a thing about it, falling in love."
Sir Bobbie Robson RIP
Posted: 2/1/2014 12:27:56 PM
|"What are you all hiding for? They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist.............."|
"The beatings shall continue until morale improves"
"Don't call me SIR...i work for a living"
“No operation extends with any certainty beyond the first encounter with the main body of the enemy.”
Posted: 2/20/2014 11:48:46 PM
|this one that i've just read on a google news article|
James Watt once famously said that a lie can run around the world before the truth has got its boots on.
Posted: 3/3/2014 4:26:54 AM
|..."Warning: If you are reading this then this warning is for you. Every word you read of this useless fine print is another second off your life. Don't you have other things to do? Is your life so empty that you honestly can't think of a better way to spend these moments? Or are you so impressed with authority that you give respect and credence to all that claim it? Do you read everything you're supposed to read? Do you think every thing you're supposed to think? Buy what you're told to want? Get out of your apartment. Meet a member of the opposite sex. Stop the excessive shopping and masturbation. Quit your job. Start a fight. Prove you're alive. If you don't claim your humanity you will become a statistic. You have been warned...” |
― Chuck Palahniuk, Fight Club
Posted: 3/3/2014 9:53:54 AM
|I'll open the door|
Anne franks last words
Take no prisoners men
Custers last words
Posted: 3/19/2014 6:11:28 PM
|Aw here ive just watched angelas ashes. I forgot just how sad that whole life was for working class folk back then.|
I dont think we will ever go back to them but who knows? Anyway the conversation between Malachy (robert carlyle)
and Angela (emily watson)
I'll get a job, I promise.
If you get a job, you lose it the third week because you drank all the wages and you miss the work.
I'll get by Angela... I'll change.
The dole is 19 shillings, and the rent is 6. That leaves 13 shillings to feed and clothe five people!
God is good, you know.
Good may be good for someone somewhere, but he hasn't been seen lately in the lanes of Limerick.
Angela... you go to hell for saying that.
Aren't I there already?
Posted: 5/23/2014 12:23:29 AM
|Hi, I come from the land down under (Australia) but wondered if it would be okay for me to post in the British forums because I was born in England?|
Anyway, if it's not, I will just have one post. A quotation I like is:
"They were pleasant enough people but if they were books I wouldn't read them".
Barbara Vine (aka Ruth Rendell)
Posted: 6/2/2014 3:36:25 AM
|I saw a meme on facebook this week that made perfect sense:|
"I'm not an arsehole; in fact I'm actually one of the nicest people you will ever meet. You're just pissed that I can see through your bullshit".
Something to think about when someone is going off on one.
Posted: 6/9/2014 3:12:11 PM
|Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.........Mae West|