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 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 211
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?Page 4 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
All this concern over the validity of a lasting relationship is really quite comical. How many 18 year old females find their 18 year old male counterpart and live happily ever after?

Come on, folks. Let's a least give the appearance we're discussing reality.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 212
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/29/2008 6:09:38 PM
Thanks for the summation Professor Tick Tock, I assume now you've collected your Nobel prize now

You're pretty sore about me pointing out your idiotic post, aren't ya? I'll give you a hint: don't fudge stats and you won't be made to look foolish. Take a deep breath...feel better now?


Were not talking about other cultures and arranged marriages, were talking about today's western society Jagoff. not yesteryear.
Actually, the relationships that I saw were between people that were born and raised in this country and it occurred in the present.


They have a name for people who like the young ones its called Ephebophilia, they (society) deems it a problem to give it a name.

Hmmm...another brilliant observation from you, mahogany. I guess since they gave names to homosexuals and heterosexuals, then they must be problematic to society as well. Ephebophilia is a term used to describe an attraction to adolescents, just like homosexuality is a term used to describe an attraction to the same gender. While it may be disgusting in your eyes, it is not a crime.


Want to talk about bullshit why dont you tell us why its ok for 40 year old plus to marry someone 19 ? care to share your wisdom oh great one?
I'm not for it or against it. Could care less, oh not-so-bright one.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 214
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/29/2008 7:23:24 PM
^ What's the matter, Mahogony? You seem to avoid commenting on the content of my posts where I point out another one of your many flawed statements. Too easy...




and a 18 year old is what???

An adolescent. Duh! My goodness, do I have to dumb it down even further for you? Just because society gave a term for this type of attraction, it does not make it a problem for society at large, does it? They give terms to many types of attractions, like homosexuality and heterosexuality. The mere existence of a term does not equal a societal problem as your "logical" mind somehow deduced.



I guess it stems from a lack of logic eh Slick

You would know, Mahogony. No one throws out wild statements like you do and then walks away from defending them when they are called into question. Keep up the good work!

Well...back to the hockey game. I can't wait to see what insights you have in store next!
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 217
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/29/2008 9:44:15 PM
You're boring me now , and you missed the sarcasm Slick, must I explain everything to you Chico, should I dumb it down for you or say it slower you know S L O W E R

That might be a little too Q U I C K for your brain to process. You're better off sticking to what you do best...making outlandish statements like the ones I quoted again below. Anyway, I never noticed any sarcasm...just pathetic attempts to avoid being called on your crap.



You're acting like this is a theoretical exercise for me or something, its not Slick.
Never said anything about it being a theoretical exercise, you're stating absolutely ludicrous things as if they were fact. Let me refresh your memory:

Mahogany quote #1: "So what Steve, I can point out couples who married or were attached at that age, her being 19 the guy 30 ish, who are not together today, so whats the point? for ever 1000 failures there is 1 success? great odds .........I think you have a better chance playing Lotto."

Mahogany quote #2: "They have a name for people who like the young ones its called Ephebophilia, they (society) deems it a problem to give it a name."





And you think most adolescents are ready for the responsibilities and roles of being a wife, and mother, if so look at some of the threads of young married mothers on here looking for friends/talk email.

You need to work on your reading comprehension. No one said "most adolescents", but rather that there might be a few that are, in fact, suited for such a relationship. It's their life and their choice.
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 218
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 4:56:39 AM

(Msg 225) And you think most adolescents are ready for the responsibilities and roles of being a wife, and mother, if so look at some of the threads of young married mothers on here looking for friends/talk email.


I see two things to consider. If it's a question about the man's age she will do much better marrying an older man than she will a younger man. Generally speaking, an older male will be more established. That translates into providing a more secure environment for any possible children as well as for the gal herself.

If it's just a question of marriage I think it's safe to say she will avoid the inevitable 18 and 19 and 20 year olds just dropping by for sex and breaking her heart. As I asked earlier how many 18 year olds marry their boyfriend and have a marriage of any length?

A 40 year old will, almost always, treat her better. As for the "novelty" wearing off when the guy is 50 she will be 30. I have no doubt the "novelty" will still be there.

If, after ten years, she decides to leave she will leave with a lot more than if she was leaving a 28 year old assuming she married someone her own age. If she leaves at 28 she will receive the mandatory child support payments and the Judge will no doubt add that she receive support for a period of time, say, two years. In that time she will be able to return to school and increase her education enabling her to get a job.

The point is even the worst case scenario is not all that bad concluding marrying a 40 year old is a win-win situation.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 220
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 8:03:42 AM
Tick tock, preach on brother, shout it from the mountain top so we can praise Gawd

Thank you, God! Thank you for making some targets sooooooooooooo easy!
Back to you, Mahogony:
Oh, the irony! Preaching is EXACTLY what you've been doing, my friend. lol. Instead of discussing this issue, you've been trying to convince everyone that it is wrong, wrong, wrong...even to the point of making up statistics off the top of your head to plead your case...tsk tsk. And then, you're so unobjective, that you misinterpreted a term to mean that society has a problem with this situation. I think you are too emotionally invested and can't see things clearly anymore. You may need to google 'therapists' to remedy your situation. I wish you well.


At least guys like Dave1234 has a opinion and voices it unlike some cowards
Perhaps this is a little above you, Mahogany, but people can feel this way about certain issues in life. Only simple minded people see every issue in terms of black and white. They are the same people being spoon fed the enemies of freedom crap that we hear south of the border. Let me break it down for you, so you won't be scratching your head too much: I am not for it (meaning it doesn't appeal to myself personally because I like a bit of experience and intelligence in my partner) but I am not against it (that is, just because it is not my cup of tea, doesn't mean it is not a perfect fit for someone else). It feel the same way about many things in life. For example, homosexuality: I am not for it (doesn't appeal to me since I have no attraction to men) and I am not against it (I believe poeple have a right to express their sexuality in whatever way they please without the fear of discrimination). Unlike yourself, I don't have a need to judge people or their business and, at least, make an attempt to see things from their perspective. Have you got it yet?



but im flattered from all the attention from you
muahhhhhhhhh big boy.

Uh oh! There you go misinterpreting things again. I noticed all the cute pet names you were giving me, but I didn't think that you were that serious. Sorry Mahogany, you should refer to what I was saying about homosexuality above. Hope I didn't break your heart.


I do hope in the future you refer to the topic at hand as opposed to a individual poster

You might want to take that advice yourself. Hmmm...I remember questioning your statistics (on topic) and then you went into a rage because someone, GOD FORBID!, dared questioned your "wisdom". lol.

PS. Can't wait to see another brilliant retort from you, Mahogany, when I get home from work!
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 225
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 9:56:02 AM
Well, I gotta head out the door, Mahogony, but I'll give you another lesson before I leave.





oh i see so because i said that im now making up statistics? first thing I was talking to Steve, so prove to me that im wrong Slick ,Do you have stats to suggest otherwise? put your money where your mouth is......You opened it up so prove to me that im wrong? some people's kids

YOU'RE the one who threw them out there and I'm the one who challenged you on them. YOU have yet to back them up so who is being the coward now? I mean, if you so readily knew the statistic on how many failed relationships there were per 1000, they must have been right at your fingertips. Right? .




So I see, because my opinion differs from yours that makes me wrong and you right?

You have the right to be wrong, but please state that it is your opinion and stop trying to speak on behalf of society as if it is fact (like in your infamous post: " They have a name for people who like the young ones its called Ephebophilia, they (society) deems it a problem to give it a name." lol I still get a laugh out of that one). Like I said before, the mere existence of a term does not mean that society views it as a problem, otherwise we'd all be screwed.




oh goonie goo goo, typical politically correct answer, cause you have no f uckin opinion while I may not agree with Dave1234, at least he's got the balls to voice a opinion and him i can debate with ,you are just a f uckin coward hiding behind a screen afraid to voice a opinion and comes up comedic innuendo's and whats with the Homosexuality comments

Sounds like you're getting angry, Mahogany. I love when unintelligent people try to goad a judgement out of someone who views it differently from themselves. Everything is in writing already if you're capable of reading. You can stick to your holier-than-thou mentality and paint everything with stokes of black and white, while I am capable of seeing the spectrum. It suits you, my friend.

PS. Try not to get too upset, Mahogony. I can almost see your stress lines.
 nycdoctor
Joined: 8/2/2005
Msg: 229
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 12:28:39 PM
I see nothing wrong with that...
she is giving him what he want...which is sex
and he is giving what she want...which is security

and they are both adults
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 233
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 7:00:20 PM
well Professor I got my information from International humanist and Ethical Union , and how they launched a joint campaign with WPF against the horror of child marriages,( marriages under 19 years of age) no need to make up stats Jagoff, why dont read the reports for your self or are you too busy catching up on episodes of " Family guy"

Bwahahahahaha!! Nice try, Mahogany! Did you actually believe that I wouldn't look at their website? Oh man, you are either a) not bright or b) desperate to manipulate facts. Let me underline why:
1) I didn't see any stat listed regarding marriages between 40 year olds and 18 year olds. Why don't you provide a link? Oh yeah, that's because none exists.
2) They are talking about forced (arranged) marriages in third world countries whereas we are talking about a mutual relationship in western countries (but you already knew that when you said that in an earlier post, didn't ya? ;) )
3) Your report concentrates on children/adolescents from the ages of 14-19 (lumped together as one), so your made-up stat (because there was no stat) doesn't apply for the reasons all the reasons above plus the fact that no one here is talking about relationships with anyone under the age of 18.
4) The only thing that resembles a stat that I saw was that the mortality rate for young girls (1o-up) during pregnancies in coerced marriages and in third world countries was higher than that of women in their twenties.

So...how does that have anything to do with what Steve originally said? I'll refresh your memory before you try another not-so-slick maneuver to avoid this:

Steve wrote:

I know a couple who got together when she was 19 and he 49. They moved in and are still together after 7 years. No, they are not married but neither are a lot of couples.

To which you responded:

So what Steve, I can point out couples who married or were attached at that age, her being 19 the guy 30 ish, who are not together today, so whats the point? for ever 1000 failures there is 1 success? great odds .........I think you have a better chance playing Lotto."




I guess if I'm watching Family Guy, you must be watching Teletubbies because man o man is your critical thinking nonexistent.
____________________________________________________________


Tick Tock wrote:

You have the right to be wrong, but please state that it is your opinion and stop trying to speak on behalf of society as if it is fact. Like I said before, the mere existence of a term does not mean that society views it as a problem, otherwise we'd all be screwed

Your response:

I can see " reading" is something you don't do to often? good Lord
THIS IS WHAT I SAID


In my opinion there is still a huge gap in maturity levels, 2) Tell me what do they have in common that they could discuss on a equally intellectual ground??-mahoganyrush MSG 187

In my OPINION (need a definition of Opinion too?) ......care to buy Hooked on Phonics now, they might have a special discount if you hurry


Actually, I think you need to check your memory there, bud. Let me refresh your memory, yet again, as to the gem of a post that you left behind that I was actually refering to, but you're trying to scurry away from like a cockroach from light. Nice try!:

Mahogany wrote:
They have a name for people who like the young ones its called Ephebophilia, they (society) deems it a problem to give it a name
Ah...that just never gets old!


Tip for you, Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but why do some abuse the privilege ???kumbaya my lord Kumbaya

I don't know, but I'm taking your privileges away. Now go to your room and try something you're good at, like giggling at pop-up books.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 234
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 7:36:30 PM
Oh, one more thing Mr. Reading Comprehension, you wrote this:


well Professor I got my information from International humanist and Ethical Union , and how they launched a joint campaign with WPF against the horror of child marriages,( marriages under 19 years of age)

while they (the group you quoted) want this:



Introducing laws to raise the legal age of marriage to 18 years, as agreed in the African Charter on the Rights and Welfare of the Child
 TonyAlmeda
Joined: 12/6/2007
Msg: 235
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 1/30/2008 7:40:01 PM
youre sounding like a loser now Tick tock, who the fuk cares what who quoted what, you havent said shit about the topic, you just like to scrap, and mahogany youre doing the same thing
no wonder threads get deleted cause of d ickheads like you guys who try to out do each other

I love it when guys without pictures fight, youre too chicken to post pics and you try to sound like tough guys

any ways that f cuked up, any guy over 40 went after my daughter, might not make it out of my place in one piece the sick fuk
 cmdr_iceman
Joined: 5/30/2007
Msg: 240
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 10:44:25 AM
~OP~
I see no problem with such a relationship. In today’s society at 18yrs old she is recognized as a legal adult capable of making her own decisions . She is no long a “girl” she is a woman, albeit young, but nonetheless a woman.

Furthermore you make the mistake of imputing your own desires and ambitions as to what you would have wanted for yourself onto her. Not everyone takes the same path in life.
 x_file
Joined: 6/25/2006
Msg: 246
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 4:35:17 PM
A lucky man. Congrats!
 forumschick
Joined: 1/15/2008
Msg: 250
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 4:48:09 PM
What is so wrong with it?
How do you all know that it will not work...?

Whatever it is for both of them, they are not doing anything wrong legally speaking...
If morality is your concern, well no, they aren't doing anything immoral either...
One question, did they ask your opinion?
No?
Well, let's see...Who cares then...

The age difference could be the secret for a long lasting true love relationship...


As if there was such thing..he he he
 Iam5string
Joined: 10/20/2006
Msg: 253
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 5:12:48 PM
Very Interesting!? I am sure the 40 yr old man would feel proud to know he "still has it" at his age plus having someone at that young age go for him would boost his ego "HOWEVER" the things they would share about life/goals/direction as time goes on would be limiting.

I am not saying it couldn't work but going to social events, parties and just plain being out together in public could be awkward....BUT if they are in "LOVE" then nothing wouldn't matter to them.

I too have dated some women much younger than me (tho I myself am young-looking) but there comes a point in time where one has to face reality that the -Maturity- level is off balance especially at the age gap......FACE the FACTS believe me!!

So ...if one is willing to stand up to some ridicule/stealing from the baby's crib/public criticism then "Go for It".....some people out there who are up there in age can act immature as well so what is the difference??
 Wabbitswayer
Joined: 10/4/2005
Msg: 258
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 8:24:55 PM
Knew an old man once who was older than his mother in law, outlived his wife and lived to be a great grandpa..........maybe the guy just don't want one dying on him
 sandra19
Joined: 9/30/2007
Msg: 260
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/19/2008 10:20:51 PM
i think ppl are allowed to be with/ marry who ever they want.
y are u ppl judging her ..u dono whats inbetween them ...maybe she doesnt want nor need the whole dating crap coz she found someone good ..y does age have to matter ? like come on...
at least shes married with him and shes not sleeping around with any random man like most 18 year olds
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 267
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 2/21/2008 12:10:40 AM
Any man would. Only the fugly ones protest.
 D Laurier
Joined: 2/11/2007
Msg: 272
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 3/26/2008 9:22:42 AM
Untill recently this type of relationship was fairly normal.
And in asia and rural europe it still is considered normal.

Traditionaly it took years for a man to build up enough money to afford to marry, So men would remain unmarried untill well into their 30s and 40s. But while a man had to bring wealth and property to the marriage, a woman had only to bring fertility.
The result was an abundance of 14 year old brides marrying 40 year old men.
Of course there was no such thing as dating. (and no "single life"). Marriages were contracts between men. Women were just another barganing chip.
A woman who was not married by age 16 was considered an "old maid", and was subjected to scorn and periodic accusations of witchcraft.
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 273
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 4/7/2008 11:17:23 AM
There are so many single Moms out there, they have children from young men, who can't or wont except responcibility for there children, its a wonder that more do not find older men
i have always dated women in my age range, so this is not really about me, but, i can see the why younger women would want an older man, they would be treated with much more respect
 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 274
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 4/7/2008 12:55:09 PM
i believe it can work, my parents had 20 years difference between them, and they had a wonderful relationship,that being said, i personaly have never had a relationship with anybody more than 6 years younger, but i know a few friends that have much younger wives,it works, nothing scarier than a younger woman that wants to have a relationship with someone her own age,lets face it an 18 year old does not have the maturity to take care of children, for that matter most boys that age only think of one thing
 daynadaze
Joined: 2/11/2008
Msg: 280
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:45:36 PM
Nobody should be married when they are only 18, they don't have a clue what they will want when they grow up. A 40 year old who would take advantage of someone's youth and immaturity is unlikely to be a good person to try to make a marriage with. Of course there are always exceptions, but really, she'll more than likely grow up and one day want nothing more than to run screaming into the night.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 284
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 5/7/2008 2:07:43 AM
^ Whatever! Find me an 18 year old hotty and I'll fill 'er up to 80 psi before she knows what hit her. Who cares...
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 290
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18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 5/7/2008 11:24:43 AM
Good luck to any guy who wants to marry an 18 year old.... they are very high maintenance and all those hormones/mood swings/demands....

And this is different from women in their twenties and thirties how???? Oh yeah, I remember, the older they get, the more weapons they learn to employ.
 bcsofnc57
Joined: 11/20/2007
Msg: 309
18 year old girl marries a 40 year old man?
Posted: 5/8/2008 11:06:43 PM

I know these marriages happen, yet I'm not a supporter of them. I think the girl is seeking a father figure, and the guy is insecure. The age gap is nearly a generation. She's just begun her life and he's well into his. Beyond the sex, there is so much more a couple shares. Its only my opinion of course.


There is a genertion between them. He is 22 years older than her, and easily old enough to be her father. The government has decided for whatever reason that 18 is an adult, but is someone that is 18 years old truly an adult in every way? I think not. A 40 year old man marrying a 18 year old girl, seems like a border line child molestor to me.
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