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 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 130
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Why a virgin?Page 3 of 19    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19)
Adriana:

Show me a man who has never sinned. I'll show you a man who's really boring.

Ofcourse, anyone can set any standards they want for themselves and their lives and the people they associate with. In fact it's a good thing to set and live up to honorable and just standards.

I think you'll find there are much more important things to judge a person on rather than trivialites like this. We are more than the sum of our parts. A great deal of what makes a persons character, and makes them lovable, is their experience through life. Our love and our capacity for love shouldn't be bartered so cheaply.
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 131
Why a virgin?
Posted: 1/22/2006 3:24:17 PM
If you want to play devil's advocate let's do it respectfully. Thanks to those of you who have been honest enough to state you want a virgin wife even though you are getting slack for it. I may not agree with you but appreciate your opinions. Let's not put each other down.

Drummer Girl, I agree with you that we should be respectful of people with different opinions. If my favorite color is red and yours is blue, that doesn't we should be hateful to each other.

If my observations are correct, most young men prefer virgins, and men and women in their thirties and above, and young non-virgin women strongly disagree with that choice. For the older men, it is good that they don't want a virgin since it is highly unlikely any woman that old would be a virgin. Therefore, it is mute; they don't have any other choice; however, I see no reason for them to be critical of the choices that young men make.

I can understand that young non-virgin women would object if men choose virgins over them. I am sure their reason is obvious to everyone. I on the other hand am glad they do because, in effect, I feel I am rewarded for maintaining my principles.

In my opinion, there is no significant physical difference between a virgin and non-virgin without children. However, there is usually a big difference in attitudes and values, and attitudes and values are important considerations in selecting a mate.
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 132
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Why a virgin?
Posted: 1/22/2006 8:02:24 PM
Your right Kelley

It's all very well to be choozy about things when your 19 and have people around you all the time. But take a look at these people here. As you get older, friends and lovers get harder to find. Come back in about 15 years, virginity is going to be a very picky detail.
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 133
Why a virgin?
Posted: 1/22/2006 8:23:40 PM
I will not be a virgin in 15 years; I'm certain I will not be a virgin in 5 years. But I hope to retain the same principal and attiudes toward premartial and extramartial sex. And, even if I don't, I will not be critical of young people that do have my value system. If something happens, and in 15 years, I am divorced or somehow lost a husband and have three children, I know I wlll not have the choices I have now. And to catch a man, or maybe just to have companionship, I will have sex with men. I don't know. That all hypothetical.

However, now I do have choices. Guys want me and they respect my values, or at least they tell me they do.
 TechnoBear
Joined: 11/10/2004
Msg: 142
Why a virgin?
Posted: 1/26/2006 3:53:20 PM
Virgins are boring. Doesn't anyone remember high school? Jeez the begging just about drove me insane, until I closed my mouth!
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 145
Why a virgin?
Posted: 1/27/2006 2:25:42 PM
hehe... that might be true if I wasn't a virgin... but I am... I just don't see the big fuss about it...

Jezika, that is a very nice comeback. I pity poor Carldeen in trying to find anything to say in response. Still, should you decide you would like to get married, I bet you don't mind if guys would choose you first rather than later.
 Toronto100
Joined: 12/5/2005
Msg: 149
Why a virgin?
Posted: 2/13/2006 5:02:34 PM
I read in a paper, that virgins are more loyal partners than non-virgins because they tamed the temptation. However, nothing is absolute! Losing your virginity would not make you a horrible wife who runs to the neighbour's house the minute her husband goes to work. In your case, two intimate relationships for a 35 years old is pretty close to a virgin! Smart move to dump the idiot!
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 156
Why a virgin?
Posted: 2/22/2006 5:14:04 PM

If you're not a virgin, then sex crimes aren't as serious.

It depends on the circumstances. If a man holds a knife to your throat and rapes you, it matters little if you are a virgin or a slut. It's very traumatic and the penalty should be equally severe in either case. A key word is force. She didn’t consent to sexual intercourse and he didn’t force her to have sexual intercourse, so it is likely he didn’t use much force. No indication that she struggled or fought.

Sluts dress and act provocative to lead the men on. Nevertheless, they have a right to say no and if a slut says no then it’s rape. However, it is true that an acquaintance rape where very little force is used does not harm a slut like it would a nice girl. After all sex is much like a handshake to a slut. So while the man should be convicted in both cases it is only reasonable that penalty, except for violent rapes, should be less for a slut since the harm was so much less and because sluts bring it own to themselves by being provocative.
 Melodic Euphoria
Joined: 3/22/2005
Msg: 158
Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/18/2006 8:46:17 AM
What is the deal with men wanting to be married to a virgin


MWAHAHAHAHA! Does that mean there're plenty of readily marrying merry fishes for my pond?


PS. This is because of the following perception,

1) Virgins prove themselves to be women of class - because they're comfortable with their sexuality regardless of how desirable they think they are to men. They have nothing to prove to men, unlike the growing whoring masses who'd take any guy who gives them a mere passing glance.

2) see the above reasons. Including that Virgins are likely to be more loyal partners, they're morally apt, etc.

3) but the biggest of all reasons is probably that some men likes inexperienced virgins who sqirums under their skin without the slightest clue of what to expect. But that's probably unlikely for modern virgins to be that overly ignorant, though, with those hollywood movies and those pop music and all.


But Virgins are only the one end of the extreme. The whore is the other. The norm is the women who is virgin enough to reserve themselves for the men in their past they have liked, but not so whorish that they'd sleep with anyone.
 sayonara7
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 166
Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/27/2006 6:41:24 PM
Right...Ernest..which century are you from? I'm a virgin and it's my choice, I'm not a virgin because I think and i quote "the man has to be experienced while the woman is pure and holy"get over it loser!Oh and guess what, I'd never even date someone like you, and I hope no virgin will, with the cheap mentality that you have.Men and women are equal.If a man can sleep with dozens of women ,then so can a woman.What are you, a lowly primitive cave man?!God....can't believe men like you still exist!
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 168
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Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 5:29:48 PM
Jezika, you are right. A guy could be a virgin but was dumped because he was caught kissing another woman. They are two very different issues.

There are those who want to wait until marriage for intercourse. Now if a man wanted me to do that I would respect his feelings if I loved him enough to marry him. However, I fall in the middle on this one, not believing in either extreme of "sex too soon" or waiting all the way to the wedding day. I personally feel that engagement to marry is a good marker for commitment and a good point to have first intercourse with a man. It's more meaningful than sex too soon.
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 169
Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 12:13:47 AM
When it comes to sex and things related to sex, if other things are equal,experience loses to non-experience. Amateur strip tease dancers win over professionals. Virgins win over non-virgins. Experience is worthless.
 World Peace Kitten
Joined: 3/30/2006
Msg: 173
Why a virgin?
Posted: 4/1/2006 7:57:44 AM
Oh my-my-my-my, I am amused and touched by this forum post. As both and clinical therparist who specialized in sex issues (a.k.a. sex therapist) AND an adult female who is a virgin I still have to agree with Felinessa....purity is not about the state of your gentials - it's about the state of your mind and soul.

Honestly, in my experence, the few men I have wanted to expore relationships with DIDN'T want me because I was a virgin...the joke was I had a "reputation" for being 'the virgin'. But I feel the bottom line is, if you love someone enough to WANT TO SPEND THE REST OF YOUR NATURAL LIFE WITH THEM - why are you getting hung up on labels like virgin/non-virgin?? If this person is of the character that you fell so deeply into love and admiration for them, why would having previous sexual experiences change those feelings? And if you find out your partner is not a virgin and it DOES change those feelings...I am going to argue you never REALLY love/respected her in th first place. Shame on you for leading her to believe you loved her and shame on you for fooling yourself.

And what about if she is not a virgin because she was sexuall assaulted or even sexually abused as a child? Is that HER fault?

We need to stop judging people by labels and numbers and we need to start judging people on the character and quality of their heart, mind and soul.
 Kelleyisnice
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 174
Why a virgin?
Posted: 4/1/2006 2:32:25 PM

I'm sorry to say this, but a "slut" with compassion and respect for other human beings is a much better human being than you'll ever be. Virginity alone doesn't make anyone nice, so don't fool yourself into thinking you're a nice girl. You're scraping the bottom of morality.

Resorting to name calling against virgins is so typical of loose women that spread their legs to anything in pants.
 basalisk
Joined: 3/30/2006
Msg: 175
Why a virgin?
Posted: 4/1/2006 3:35:26 PM
I don't think that men *really* care. I think it's just an excuse because he didn't have the courage to look you in the eye and tell you the real reason he wanted to break up.

If someone rejected me because I'm not a virgin, I would laugh and say, "hey 1932 called, it wants its unrealistic expectations back."
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