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 ttawny
Joined: 9/10/2006
Msg: 269
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?Page 4 of 20    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20)
Do I know the person? Using the term "favors" which would indicate the guest is invited.....and behaving "favorably"
 acgoat
Joined: 8/8/2005
Msg: 271
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 6/15/2007 4:58:57 AM
OP
With you stating longterm relationship, is there any better way to wake up than having a big orgasm from oral stimulation? How could it be rape? You knew he was in the bed when you laid down.
 csod64
Joined: 6/21/2007
Msg: 273
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/2/2007 3:07:29 PM
Wake me up, honey! I wouldn't be in bed with the guy if this wasn't a possibility.
 csod64
Joined: 6/21/2007
Msg: 278
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 4:34:31 AM
I was dozing off at the keyboard--before I read that! Oh, wow! How I wish could find a guy who would really dig that kind of treatment! I'm sure that "he" or "they" are out there. It's just a matter of looking--and asking.

I'm so sorry about your loss--make that losses. There is nothing worse for a man who finds that his beloved has an extremely low sex drive. Physical love in a marriage should be a "no-holds-barred" experience. Marriage is the ultimate "trust". I hope that either you find your old flame, or find some who will make you forget all about her--for the right reasons!
 Limestone_Lady
Joined: 6/20/2007
Msg: 279
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 8:54:47 AM
I've taught my man how to wake me up receptive of sex, because just taking the plunge might cause me to wake up less than thrilled. So I taught him to gently stroke my inner thighs, lightly brush his fingers down my spine, gently kiss my neck and ears, trace my collarbone with his fingers, and placing his erection against me, but not in me.

Never fails for him. After that I usually pin him down in a frenzy.
 dragonshungry
Joined: 1/5/2007
Msg: 280
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 10:21:27 AM
well, thats is very shallow of a friend to brake up a 6 year marriage over the pleasure of being woke up with sex, i would suggest your friend get off the crazy train and enter reality of life......
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 283
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 11:16:49 AM
how can it be rape... help me i cant see it... and please believe im not in any way condoning violence it might be that i am just naive or something but how can it be rape with a person that you are in an active sexual relationship .... how can you be violated by a man having sex with you when a few hours before you were with him willingly ... i can under stand if he forced you that would be an assault and if you said no and he has been married to you for 6 years i would think he would know it would be in his best interest to take no for the answer but still not rape .... come on now she has been sleeping with this guy for 6 years why would it be a big deal if he entered her while she was asleep or even drunk... and i am going to get hammered for this but here goes .... i dont believe that (except for a few circumstances) two people in a sexual long term relationship have the right to tell the other one NO ....the relationship should be a safe place for both to get their needs met ... and both parties owe it to the other to do their best to meet those needs and supply the others fantasies what ever they may be as long as it falls in the guidelines of previously discussed limits...and not to do so is a violation of the relationship
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 287
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 12:26:45 PM
now look i didn't say they did not have the right i said with a few exceptions... and i do think there are a few ...but when it is continuous the relationship is over ... i don't want to get hammered for what i didn't say i don't think any one should be forced i just think that not having sex with your partner without good reason would give them the right to leave the relationship...marriage or other

Liana K the way i see it is we both essentially said the same things and I think the people that have read my post in the past will know what im saying No i expect to get hammered by the people that dont know me ... but if they read carefully what i said im not worried

I did not say he should not take NO i said she should not say no so i in no way condoned forcing sex on anyone

and though i might try to stir things up a bit from time to time its not hard to see my opinion on here from my posts

on a side note I have never told a person (that i was involved in a relationship with) no and there have been times when i didn't want to do anything...so i cant see where it is such a big sacrifice to a woman to provide sex when she just dosent want to..

I would think if they owe each other fidelity they owe each other sex and isnt that what belonging to each other means when not perverted

I am about equality but sometimes thats for men too
 Leeanne
Joined: 10/14/2005
Msg: 289
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History
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 1:06:04 PM
I think this is one of the finest parts of a monogomus longterm relationship - being desired 24/7 - especially being brought awake by the one you love and who loves you - making you feel desired! To think it is rape is irrational!!
 miss_vixen
Joined: 5/22/2007
Msg: 291
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/3/2007 2:39:55 PM
i love it, infact i was waken this morning for sex and i've been in the best mood ever since, i think its the perfect way to start your day
 deerdog1
Joined: 12/29/2006
Msg: 292
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/4/2007 4:19:24 AM
maybe im not communicating what i want to say very well but i dont think that we are so far apart on our thinking ...Im not saying that anyone should be forced or badgered into sex anytime but to withhold sex on a continuous basis... for trivial reasons or without giving a reason is wrong and violates the spirit of the union . a person should want to please their partier ...but i have seen, this in my past experiences and hear of it all the time where the woman starts withholding sex for long periods of time and for reasons that she does not have or refuses to give.. then after he leaves her he is the bad guy... I say that when the sex and intimacy stops the relationship is already very sick. so in this sense both parties have an obligation to want to provide sex to their partner Im not talking about saying No every once in a while (have you tried laying by the person you love and want for months) and them telling you no and not telling you why ... I have ..and i fought for years to avoid leaving but finally the feeling of not being loved was to much and then everyone said he left her for no reason( i guess cause she told everyone that)... so what im saying i guess is that I lived with it for so long that i believe that being denied sex and intimacy for months on end is a violation of the marriage


<div class='quote'>it constitutes rape..

i have never had sex when the welcome mat was not out but I have been hurt because it was never out
Now everyone says I left her cause i just got tired of her what i got tired of is having all the obligations of a marriage and none of the perks. so when the kids were grown and left home so did I
I am in no way sexist but all parties involved have to give or sooner or later it fails
hope this helps you
would have posted this yesterday evening but the two in ten rule got me( it sucks)

so hammer away i have been hammered over this so long im use to it... i try to see all sides of situations but i still cant see where im wrong in saying that both parties are obligated to want to see to the needs of their partner
 rjpeagles
Joined: 11/30/2005
Msg: 293
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/4/2007 6:23:16 AM

Okay other people who I am friends with think this is rape and broke off a 6 year marriage because he did this... Whats your opinion??


That that person has some seriously unresolved emotional and mental issues. They must have been in an abusive relationship where they didn't want sex at all.
 QTpye16
Joined: 6/29/2007
Msg: 295
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/4/2007 7:26:38 AM
Oh man, I loved this!! I used to do it to my ex all the time, lol. He absolutely loved it! Even did it to me quite a few time, best sex we ever had....oh, and don't let me get started on 'wake-up 5am' sex.....anyway back to your question, no, I don't think it's rape unless that person is hurting you in some way or it's truly something the other person doesn't want.
 Tukabirdy
Joined: 4/1/2007
Msg: 301
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/8/2007 9:38:47 AM
If the relationship is suffering from lack of communication, marital issues not resolved, intimidation and abuse, saying no may be a self protection issue and a woman or man could construe it as a rape. Unfortunately there are people out there in relationships of fear...who have not gotten out yet or resolved marital issues.


For the others who have good relationships AM sex is a treat and some of the most fun a couple can have!!

Personally though....there have been a few times I went to bed so tired I didn't really want to be awakened for anyone. Kids will exhaust you as well as work or grief issues and I would hope the man would understand this as I would understand it for him. tuka
 AgelessWonder
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 303
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 7/19/2007 3:54:51 PM
^^^^^ I agree, or if she woke up and told him to stop and he didn't that would also be rape. I'm sure there is more to the story.

For everyone who thinks a husband cannot rape his wife, or someone in a sexual reationship can't rape their partner, that is far from the truth. That is a form of abuse but a lot of people don't talk about it because they really don't think it is rape.
 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 311
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/8/2008 9:57:21 PM
I wonder how the genuine rape victims would feel about this atttitude.

The rape tag is being attached to everythig these days. Secuirity vidieo showing short skits and cleavages being listed as "rape by the camera" (Melbourne Crown Casino) A compliment "nice legs" paidn to a girl wearing a short skirt "mini rape" (Princeton University)

THIS is the real reason that police treat genuine rapes so lightly. They know that most of the rape reports they recieve are simply not the real thing.
 sass829
Joined: 12/3/2007
Msg: 312
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/8/2008 11:22:21 PM
I think it's fine as long as there is pre talked about mutual consent...Though personally due to things that have happened in the past I would not feel comfortable with this.
 cookieman83
Joined: 2/3/2008
Msg: 313
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/8/2008 11:33:49 PM
I LOVE IT when a woman wakes me up and just starts to give me oral.
 janet williams
Joined: 2/5/2008
Msg: 314
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/9/2008 2:58:36 AM
No WAY I LOVE IT LIKE THAT ITS MAKES MY DAY I FEEL LIKE SUPERWOMAN I CAN LEAP TALL BUILDING AND MY DAY IS GR........EAT:
 kenharleyride
Joined: 8/20/2007
Msg: 318
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/9/2008 10:50:28 AM
pleaseeeeeeeeeeeeeeee ladies if its rape . then rape me. nothing sexier then be woke and look down and she is already there. but i get to repay the favor
 crayonzz
Joined: 11/14/2007
Msg: 324
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/10/2008 4:02:32 AM
Y know! Ive reached the stage of my life where I wouldn't even bother with a woman who asked such a silly question.
 blkhelicptr
Joined: 2/13/2008
Msg: 328
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/18/2008 2:55:59 AM

In some states in AUS - rape is about whether you said no or not - so if your are not "conscious" of the penetration then is may or may not be considered rape.


Be VERY careful with that. Under ACT law for example, you need informed consent - if your partner is intoxicated, asleep etc, you'll have a very hard time proving you had consent if they take offence to it and you end up being charged.

CRIMES ACT 1900 - SECT 54
Sexual intercourse without consent
(1) A person who engages in sexual intercourse with another person without the consent of that other person and who knows that that other person does not consent, or who is reckless as to whether that other person consents, to the sexual intercourse is guilty of an offence punishable, on conviction, by imprisonment for 12 years.

Standard disclaimer: IANAL. Seek proper legal advice etc.
 cajun32
Joined: 7/18/2007
Msg: 329
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/18/2008 2:24:09 PM
"Little Northern Gal"
Rape is when you don't want it. If you wake up and say no thanks and he/she doesn't stop, then that is the definition. If you get aroused and say, "hey baby...you're welcome here anytime," that's just hot.

Myself... most times, bring it on!

Excuse me paleeeeeezzzzzzzzeeeeee !!!!

In 1989 I was passed out at a female friends house, "totally chemicalled up". Ther were four to five females at the apartment when I went to lay down, the owner of the apartment came in and said they were all going to another apartment in th complex as to not make so much noise and let me sleep.

I was awakened by someone performing oral sex on me, as I awoke, she was very apologetic and started to say she hadn't been with anyone in a long time, I said go for it, she stripped down and mounted me. I lasted about 30 seconds after that, it was so hot. She got dressed and left and I don't know who she was, or if she had become pregnant from the encounter.

I do need to say that I was scared to death as I was awakened, to find this stranger sucking my privates.

As for it being consenual sex or rape.

It was most certainly a sexual molestation, I have considered it rape because I didn't give this person permission to touch me, undress me, put my penis in her mouth.
After I awakened and gave the nod to proceed, it was consensual.

Now if I hold her to the same standards of Rape that are being applied to males and date rape, ie taking advantage of a person who was impaired by drugs or booze, it would be rape.
Things are different when people are a couple, and willingly sleeping in the same bed.
It would'nt be rape in this case unless either partner has specifically said that this behavior is unacceptable.
 4realgurl
Joined: 10/31/2007
Msg: 332
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/17/2008 9:02:37 AM
thats not rape, that sounds like the guy i been lookin for LOL

carly
 HulaH
Joined: 7/4/2007
Msg: 333
Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/17/2008 1:15:36 PM
Being woke up for nookie? Hell yeah!

Being half asleep means I'm uber relaxed. :)


It's only rape if you say No and try to remove yourself from the situation with no success.
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