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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Registered Sex Offender?!?      Home login  
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 indy38
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 176
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Registered Sex Offender?!?Page 8 of 12    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12)
if i had a girl she would NOT date/see any guy/man until she was 18.

Go luck with that, sounds like a recipe for raising a daughter that will end up hating your guts for trying to ruin her life.

If by some miracle you manage to mentally shackle her up that bad I can only imagine how dysfunctional and vulnerable she'll be just starting to date guys for the first time at 18!?

More likely she'll do what she wants to despite your wishes and the more hardcore you get about it the more likely she'll run like hell to get away from her dysfunctional home life (or start doing drugs for all the wrong reasons).
 Broken_Wings
Joined: 6/12/2006
Msg: 177
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 6/13/2006 4:15:43 PM
indy38


i agree with you lol and i know how she would react and do and she would sneak behind my back but better safe than sorry i mean i am not if i have a girl going tell her "your not dateing anyone until, your 18" but i would sit her down and explain to her what could happend and the, bad turns out could be if she does end up gettin with a man who is older than her.

but i guess i am a bad mom because i would rather have my daughter if i have one safe and not in any trouble with guy's/law and end up in jail before she hits 18?, i mean parents have to set GROUND RULES if they don't they will end up in worse situration's than they would want to be.
 zonquer
Joined: 6/13/2006
Msg: 178
Experiences...
Posted: 6/13/2006 8:43:22 PM
It seems to me that there is a moral panic going on, a lot of people are going nuts, a lot of people are trying to protect their children by throwing them in jail and branding them for life just because they do what children do. And 14 isn't 18 or 21, but 14 isn't 10 either....

The police did find me, a couple times, when I was 17 one summer when I had a 14-year old girlfriend, found us parked somewhere with fogged up windows, all they'd do is make us move the car. The laws were the same as today, and technically even a kiss was a crime - technically even suggestive language was a crime - but you know they didn't throw the book at kids back then. Today they do. Today it would be The List. And I think that's insane. I bet even the cops know it's insane. But they just follow orders. Good Christian, hardworking people who just follow orders. Heil.

I could be where that guy is at, if I just was in a different place and time.


Heil.
 Broken_Wings
Joined: 6/12/2006
Msg: 179
Experiences...
Posted: 6/14/2006 11:46:48 PM
Yeh i can relate because my cousin was closer than close could ever get to being in this guys shoes because he got in some shit dateing a chick who was 2yrs younger than him and her parents tryed almost everything, to get him locked up and even called the law into it but they was not that much older and my cousin was haveing sexual realtions with this chick and her parents didnt like it so they was trying have him arrested for "sexual abuse" and FORCEING their daughter to have sexual realtions with him.

a sex offender does not always mean haveing sex with kids.
 okema2012
Joined: 7/23/2008
Msg: 180
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/17/2008 7:36:43 AM
I too am dating a registered sex offender This happened to him 15 years ago and he has no record since then not even a traffic ticket. I know I checked. One suggestion I have go to the county and check him out on the criminal computer. It is public record and free to do. This will tell you what else is on his record. Use your best judgement here go by what you feel. You know what is right and what is wrong for you if you listen to yourself. Be his friend if nothing else and see what happens
 ***blue***
Joined: 4/21/2008
Msg: 181
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/17/2008 10:17:28 AM
"I too am dating a registered sex offender This happened to him 15 years ago and he has no record since then not even a traffic ticket."

My mom is married to one still. And I can tell you that no they don't change. They can curb the inpulse for a time, but I also know that if a 'perfect for them' oppertunity shows itself then it would be very hard for them not to act on it.

My mom's husband attends counseling still (yes after 15 years) and he avoids any kind of function where his 'target' age bracket (sp?) will be, because he doesn't trust himself.

I have no contact with him and will not in the future even, but that is not a chance I would even think about taking.

This is an old thread anyway so maybe all the info can help someone else.
 *~*Royal Majesty*~*
Joined: 8/5/2008
Msg: 182
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/17/2008 10:42:18 AM
I would NOT date someone with ANY type of criminal record. Period.

Background checks are very, very helpful and are a great source of personal security, safety &peace of mind, especially in today's crazy world! I highly recommend them.
 caryn86
Joined: 11/1/2008
Msg: 183
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/17/2008 4:33:15 PM
Personally, I think you should trust your own judgement. Tell him the truth. If you cant be in a relationship with him, then fine. You have already checked up on what he was in jail for, he was honest about that. And I can tell you, I never told the truth about my age when I was 13/14. Hell I work with a girl who is sixteen and looks older then me, and she has been going into pubs for a year now (Way too young too).
These days people can sue for anything, go to jail for anything, nobody can trust anything anymore. And as for the length of the sentence? It all differs case to case. I have friends, both commited assault, not sexual mind you, (different cases, but very similar) one got a year, the other had three months. It all depends on the actual juries and judges and what not.
 cacconcy1
Joined: 8/7/2007
Msg: 184
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/23/2008 9:57:16 PM
I was the victim of a sexual predator and I am not "judging" it is up to the Lord to do so'' All I can say is this. When you read on the State's site about each of these people's history they keep falling into that same category every time they are incarcerated. In my own mind you can think we all make mistakes in our lives but just the thought of a predator or offender with the words listed on that site that says" Lewd and Lacivious Acts" It gives me the cold chills just thinking about woman my age let alone little kids who are also their victims.. I have a restricted phone # as long as this man resides in Florida.. but on that same site shows predators and offenders who are ABSCONDED'' In other words they have lost track of them.. Our system does not have enough police or anyone who can "protect" us all of the time'' And here in Pasco County right on their site is three of them living on the street where there is an Elemantary school. What a terrible thought and the state is aware of that''Sorry this is so long but nothing upsets me more than this topic, I lay awake at nights thinking about the man who attacked me so brutally.. And now he is out on the streets where I testified against him'' What happens to me now?? I am more aware of my surroundings than ever.. Not in a feaful way anymore'' but in a manner of putting these people men and women both away for life so that they cannot hurt anyone else.. Again so sorry this was so long and extended.. Good night to all of you and PLEASE DO THINK ABOUT WHAT I HAVE EXPRESSED TO YOU"" I would not say what I have except my own experience and the States site that backs up everything I am saying to you''
 xsentricity
Joined: 6/18/2008
Msg: 185
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/24/2008 10:30:07 PM
A good friend of mine was in this sort of situation. We tried setting him up with girls that he met online, finally he meets one, they went to a bar, had a drink and ended up at his place. For the next few days, all I hear was how amazing she was in bed, etc... LOL! Then he sees her on facebook, with the year "1992" in her profile as her bday (this was about 2 years ago). He made a mistake, believing this girl off the bat (for Christ sakes, he met her in a BAR), and thank god she didnt say anything. If she did it would have been that he seduced her, he raped her, etc..... Just so she could protect herself from her families scorn. I say find the court records for this case, read them then decide for yourself.
Your man DID meet her in a bar, so of COURSE he thought she was of age. Its only proper isn't it?
 universegirl
Joined: 9/13/2008
Msg: 186
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History
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/25/2008 12:01:40 AM
To be perfectly honest, when I was 14 I looked like I was 18. A lot of guys thought I was even 19. I was very shapely and I look pretty much the same in that regard.

What I question is his promiscuousness in having sex with someone he just met. THAT if the problem for me. Also, the fact that it was the friend of a former girlfriend. I see no morals there - on either count. That he was 22 and had sex with someone he thought was older than she looked isn't so much the problem to me. Some teenagers act like whores at a young age, smother themselves with makeup and wear clothing that make them look much older than they are.

Having said that, though, if you really like him and you have a good sense that he is telling the truth, then mount a concentrated effort to investigate him and see what this man is all about. Until you are satisfied with the answers, do not see him. Stay in touch to keep the connection until you get the answers that you need. Do NOT become emotionally attached to this person, and it will happen if you let yourself have romantic feelings for him.

Best of luck to you.
 universegirl
Joined: 9/13/2008
Msg: 187
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/25/2008 12:04:38 AM
Blue, your mother is married to a sex offender?! WHY?!
 universegirl
Joined: 9/13/2008
Msg: 188
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History
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/25/2008 12:06:53 AM
Cacconcy1, you should not have your pictures on a public web site. You are identifying your location, where you live, etc. Use common sense and don't do that.
 ***blue***
Joined: 4/21/2008
Msg: 189
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 11/25/2008 8:59:49 AM
Hell if I know why but it's the way it is and I have absolutely no contact with him.
It's her life to do what she wants with it. As long as she is happy and he's not hurting anyone I can deal with it.
We have had a lot of long talks on the topic, and I guess she loves him. My mom's not one to give her heart away easily at all, and I guess when she does, she really does.
I'm not going to bad mouth her because she is and always has been.
I should also add that she was unaware of his problems when they married and didn't find out about them for 6 years maybe 5, until I told her and they were basically seperated until we were grown up and out of the house.
 luvmygirl
Joined: 1/11/2009
Msg: 190
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/22/2009 6:05:30 AM
I don't like to judge people personally. I'd like to believe that it is easy to see that a girl is only 14 years old, but admittedly, girls look older nowadays. That is by no means an excuse...simply an observaton. By the simple fact that she was in a bar when they met...may be a good explanation as to why he thought she was older...but one of the first questions you should always ask is how old someone is. This girl he used to sleep with...had a moral obligation to tell him that her friend was only 14...and she fell flat on her face with this one. Despite his ignorance, what he did was still wrong.

The issue is you are having doubts. Go with your gut! I have a little girl, and this would be a deal breaker for me...without question.
 good guy75
Joined: 3/25/2008
Msg: 191
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/22/2009 10:47:40 AM
hes got to go.he could not tell she was that young yea right.and your part of the problem on here asking a redicules question like that youknow that.
 breath~
Joined: 1/13/2008
Msg: 192
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/22/2009 11:18:20 AM
I only have this to add to this (old) thread.. something I noticed back in the opening post.
I never heard of someone being on the national sex offender list and then being taken off after a certain amount of time!
.....spent 21 months in prison. He is now on the sex offender database and will be for the next three years .....
 cfb62
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 193
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History
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/22/2009 1:55:13 PM
Anyone here aware that Rob Lowe's a sex offender?
He was totally tricked my two 16 year olds he met at the Democatic convention when he was in his mid 20s, back in the 80s.
 charbrier
Joined: 1/4/2009
Msg: 194
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/24/2009 6:18:09 PM
The law says he is a registered sex offender. That means he did something and in the eyes of the law he is a SEX OFFENDER. One thing I can tell you (I'm a shrink who has worked with them) they are often some of the nicest guys you'll ever meet, and usually ones you'd never suspect would be a SEX OFFENDER.

At least he was honest with you, and that's good..about being a registered sex offender. The rest is what you don't know about.

21 months in prison, ahem, is more than just a one time copping a feel punishment.

There's his side of the story, the minor's side of the story, and somewhere in the middle is MAYBE the truth.

You are only 22 years. old. Don't put all your eggs into this guys' basket. For what??
 cupcake700
Joined: 1/20/2009
Msg: 195
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/25/2009 12:34:43 PM
Well based on the circumstances as you explained them I would think it is just an unfortunate label.
Something in you though is saying, you can't trust him. So listen to your insticts and keep fishing!!
 Autumn Marie
Joined: 7/11/2007
Msg: 196
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History
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/25/2009 7:09:45 PM
Wow, that was posted in 2005?????

I hope she packed her bags, and bailed out. It's one thing to be accused, then maybe it's wrong... but when you are REGISTERED, that is a whole different thing. That is serious.

Where on earth do you get registered as a sex offender by grabbing someones bum?
I understand you may be listed under pervert, but normally sex offenders I thought, were seriously accused, and proven guilty of horrendous crimes.
 XjLevi
Joined: 12/9/2006
Msg: 197
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/28/2009 3:29:41 AM
I think you need to step back and look at this guys judgment.. im only 22 and i can tell the difference between 14 and 18+. It was a stupid move and i think it is a pretty serious reflection of his overall character
 Pilot1000
Joined: 8/6/2008
Msg: 198
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/6/2010 5:47:40 PM
You can get on the register for pissing in public. You people have no idea what you are talking about. It amazing to me how the media has all of you so parinoid.
Also 99% of offenders do not offend again.
The media has you all so screwed up.. If you would step out of your asses and think instead of being such sheep you would wake up and see that this is big money for media companys.
The ones you need to worry about are not on the register.. Yea thats right it could be your brother or uncle or cousin ETC.
I have a very good friend that is on the register. He has a great career and a wife and a kid. He made a mistake when he was younger and payed the price. But I admire that he hasnt allowed it to destroy him.. Unlike what you people would want for him. So who is the monster.
The government loves this crap its easy to control a public that is afraid. Also if you think they are the only ones loosing there rights you better look again. They sneak new laws right behind our backs when we sleep at night.
On a personal note any guy in here talking trash is just jelouse he doesnt have a attractive girl like his...:modhammer:
 elitemind
Joined: 12/27/2009
Msg: 199
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/6/2010 7:58:44 PM
I don't think I even need to read others posts to know what their saying.

This is a very fragile subject, and alot of people are very close minded about it, I was one of them until.......

I knew a guy, who had an incident 24 years ago, and all that transpired was a little touching of her backside or whatever , back than he served his penalties and wasnt required to register as a sex offender, this was done also while he was under the influence of cocaine and other drugs.

20 something years later he moves to another state, and his ex wife calls the town and somehow the police arrest him, and he has to start registering again after 20 something years, The guy did his time, and what he did back than wasnt even what it was cracked up to be (hard to explain if you dont know the story) so than he had to register.

in the past I may have been more close minded about this, but Knowing this guy I didn't judge him, and noone else did either because we saw him for who he was today not 24 years ago, and I know he definitely isn't a threat to anyone.
He lost his job, would start another one and would lose that, his own son stopped talking to him, his life was a mess, he was ready to go crazy, I truly felt so bad because he didn't deserve this.

Well I can proudly say He is now removed off the site, due to Constitutional rights, and if he wanted he could Sue for ALOT of money.

So noone should ever judge anyone without knowing the full circumstances of such events.

Also I know people who were 19-20-21 dating girls 15-16-17 and if those girls changed their mind that's all it would take for these guys to be on a website, so there are variations, but the fact is when you're labeled a sex offender, there is not gray area, you're all under one label and it isn't right.

Op I certainly understand you're in a tough spot, and it isn't easy to deal with, but honestly in your mind and heart if you know this man is a good man and you love him, don't leave him just because of that reason alone, especially when he was lied to and mislead, I feel bad for guys like him, it's not like you got in a fight or stole from a store, those things can be forgotten, the stigma of being a Rso is just terrible, Granted I'm sure most of them on their may deserve it depending on their case, but not everyone should be lumped into one category.
 elitemind
Joined: 12/27/2009
Msg: 200
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/6/2010 8:20:58 PM

You can get on the register for pissing in public. You people have no idea what you are talking about. It amazing to me how the media has all of you so parinoid.
Also 99% of offenders do not offend again.
The media has you all so screwed up.. If you would step out of your asses and think instead of being such sheep you would wake up and see that this is big money for media companys.
The ones you need to worry about are not on the register.. Yea thats right it could be your brother or uncle or cousin ETC.
I have a very good friend that is on the register. He has a great career and a wife and a kid. He made a mistake when he was younger and payed the price. But I admire that he hasnt allowed it to destroy him.. Unlike what you people would want for him. So who is the monster.
The government loves this crap its easy to control a public that is afraid. Also if you think they are the only ones loosing there rights you better look again. They sneak new laws right behind our backs when we sleep at night.
On a personal note any guy in here talking trash is just jelouse he doesnt have a attractive girl like his...:modhammer:




First, I went back and only made it through 1 page, and I was right,, a bunch of close minded ignorant people.

Pilot It's refreshing too see that some people aren't =so close minded and ignorant.
Maybe it takes guys like you and me to know someone in order to really understand this all.
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