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 Bandito
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 91
u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sexPage 2 of 50    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
to the people that have opposite sex friends

good friendships can be maintained with mutual respect and admiration of each other's position and needs in life
 darklit
Joined: 12/10/2004
Msg: 94
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/25/2006 5:38:21 PM
Did you know its a proven fact that if you lock two humans of the oposite sex in a room together. they will eventually have sex. just like any other mammal.
 lucky7innc
Joined: 1/8/2006
Msg: 97
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/25/2006 8:29:07 PM
i'm from nc as well and i have multitudes of male friends that i don't think about having sex with--i don't think they were thinking of getting lucky themselves when visiting. i've had a few of em sleep on the couch when they might be too late to go home or are passing thru or have had a bit too much wine. in my opinion a friend is a friend and if you cross the line into sex why then they are sex partners. i think maybe the friend you were talking to is of a different ilk than the ones i know-- just because we're all from nc doesn't mean we're all conservative and thinking of what we can gain from one of the opposite sex.
 Poet102781
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 103
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/26/2006 6:04:57 AM
Thats what happens to most " Nice guys " they become the best friend and like a brother....and its sad to see those guys still hold on to a fadeing dream. Do you think they care if your newest boyfriend just f#cked another woman? Nope..they hope you will see them as BF material.....cant blame men for trying tho.
 NoNeed2Look
Joined: 1/26/2006
Msg: 108
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/28/2006 1:10:01 PM
I think it also has to do with the facts, and if you count cyber, phone or e-mail.

But on to the real subject. I have male friends at work and ones that are husbands of friends it is easy to have a plutonic friendship with them.

I also have a friend (male) that I have known for 27 years. We meet in 7th grade. We never have and never will. There have been times when we could have, late nights, long talks, drunk off our buts, lonely, we even lived together for over a year. We are friends not lovers. It is all in how you see yourself and your friends. We have gone out dancing, out for dinner, to the movies, gone X-mas shopping together, I even helped him furnish his appartment when he came home from the Navy and his wife left him and we have a great time. He is more like a member of my family then anything else. I even dated someone in his family for a few years, it is great to know that even now we are still friends not time or miles keep us apart. When my son graduated from high school he flew in to see it. We sat and looked at each other like it was only yesterday when we were graduating. So YES you can as long as you truly are friends.
 Synical
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 114
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/28/2006 10:48:24 PM
It's absolutely possible. I've always gotten along better with males, simply because most of the females I've known are catty, competitive or just flat out annoying. My 3 closest friends in the universe are men, and these are long term friendships, one dating back 15 years, the shortest being 3 years. We've seen eachother through relationships, we've been single at the same time, and still the thought of anything other than good friends wasn't an option. They think of me as a sister, I think of them as brothers.

I find it flat out irritating when I hear people say that it's not possible, that the guy is definately thinking about sex, yada yada yada. I always wonder what happened to make them so cynical about friendships, and contribute it to the fact that THEY think sexually about every female friend they've ever had, and base the entire subject on that. Sad, actually.
 :
Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 118
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/29/2006 4:06:39 AM
I too have a special relationship with plutonium and the females of our species. I find generally its presence hinders my "abilities" when it comes to impressing the ladies. Often its radioactive glow makes me feel nauseous and ill.
 crayzness
Joined: 8/17/2005
Msg: 123
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/29/2006 1:43:48 PM
Women can, men can't unless the woman is really ugly. I mean really ugly.
 Synical
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 124
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/29/2006 6:32:53 PM
Since I don't consider myself ugly, I wonder how my 3 closest friends (all males) managed to maintain a sincere friendship with me over the years ...

Strange & stereotypical logic.
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 125
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/29/2006 7:05:30 PM

(Msg 134) Since I don't consider myself ugly, I wonder how my 3 closest friends (all males) managed to maintain a sincere friendship with me over the years ...


Did you notice they walked a bit stiff-legged when they left?
 Synical
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 126
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 1/29/2006 8:44:20 PM
I'm sure I would have noticed the backhand their g/f's gave them if that was so .... lol.
 uneekguy
Joined: 10/15/2005
Msg: 129
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:07:30 PM
It's amazing how some people can turn emotions on and off in an instant. They're excellent at pretending.
 Pragmatic
Joined: 11/24/2005
Msg: 130
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:38:06 PM
Absolutely you can !!

I have a few friends (female) that are very important in my life, provide a very unbiased level of support and opinion... including how well a potential girlfriend matches me.
I trust in them and I think they trust in me.
 huhoney
Joined: 10/24/2005
Msg: 132
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 2/6/2006 5:01:35 PM
u know? i think plutonic relations are illegal!
 atg
Joined: 2/4/2006
Msg: 136
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 2/6/2006 5:36:27 PM
If you want plutonic relationships go to Iran.
 cotter
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 147
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 3/27/2006 11:46:58 AM

u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
I disagree ... I have many men who I consider friends and we never get intimate. It's wonderful too because I can go to them anytime and they are there for me. Most are not married and some have girlfriends.

One once told me that if and when he ever has a girlfriend and she has no tolerance for his friendship with me ... too bad, he's not giving up my friendship. We have known each other since high school ... OMG that's over 40 years. Yea ... he's a real sweetie ... he's the one I've known the longest. We can talk about anything ... we cry with each other over lost loves (hey ... guys need to cry with someone too) ... hmmmm the list goes on.

(Running to get my reunion registration turned in so I can attend and see him!)

 OneThingMissing
Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 148
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 3/27/2006 12:37:56 PM
yes, a Plutonic relationship would be quite short and very danerous.
 jimmysmash
Joined: 4/1/2006
Msg: 152
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/1/2006 12:21:32 PM
^^^^^^unless your living in the back woods of Kentucky^^^^^^
 ChoirSparkle
Joined: 3/31/2006
Msg: 153
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/1/2006 12:26:07 PM
You most certainly can have a relationship with a guy without sex!!!!!!
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 162
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:10:33 AM

(Msg 170) I think that it is more on the rare side to have a plutonic friendship with the opposite sex but it isn't out of the question. I went out with a guy on a few dates, we kissed and made out a bit....but then realized that nothing was ever going to happen.


That's the way I see it. I think sex or the possibility of sex has to be explored or it will always be in the background.
 xcntric
Joined: 6/25/2005
Msg: 165
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/4/2006 8:21:09 PM
I've had "platonic" relationships with women my entire life, so anybody that says that can't happen is full of rubbish, but MOST of MY male friends can't do that. For them, a platonic relationship with the opposite sex equals someone they just haven't slept with yet.
Bottom line-possible, not an "everyday occurence."
 :
Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 166
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 6:54:54 AM
I went out for drinks with a female friend of mine that I have now known for almost ten years, we had some drinks got a bit tipsy, as we usualy do, had some laughs and then I walked her to where her boyfriends band was playing hugged her and said good night. Nothing has ever happend between her and I, we are both attractive, and we have known each other while we have both been single. People are not ruled by their sexual desires, we are more then this crude matter.
 :
Joined: 4/15/2005
Msg: 168
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 7:17:31 AM
As to plutonium in a friendship, radioactive elements and good friendships DO NOT MIX!
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 176
u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 5:23:15 PM
Is it possible in the practical, common sense? Depends if you're both single and straight. If you're a single girl, and you have a single guy friend, and you hang out one-on-one, regardless of his type, there's about a 99.9% chance he does not see you as just a friend. So for all practical purposes, yes, Virginia, they all want to bang you. :) And if you are a lady quickly thinking "No, that's not true! That's not true!" without really taking things into consideration, then you're clueless and wouldn't want to think otherwise anyway.

You, the lady, may see him as just a plutonic entity, but he does not. It doesn't necessarily mean he can't deal with it or anything, or he has some huge crush on you. He would like to hook up with you. Think about it, ladies. Let's say you go back to your place after a night at the bar (buzzing), he goes into your bathroom, comes out, and there you are naked on your couch and you seriously say "Let's just get dirty. Do me..." Does he:
(a) Tell you that he can't, because that might destroy a beautiful friendship, or...
(b) Comply.

You can see why guys ya date aren't thrilled about having guy friends closer than just being in the circle of your friends. And if you're attractive and single -- come on - the guy is sexually attracted to you, and does put forth the effort to build up brownie points towards possibilities, whether he does enjoy your company on a plutonic level or not.
 dave1234
Joined: 11/7/2004
Msg: 178
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u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 6:21:00 PM
I think it's a lot easier if both are in relationships.

A friend is someone who will help you in a time of need. Your car breaks down, they'll give you a ride. You're at home sick and they'll drop off some milk and bread if you can't go out to the store. You're going on vacation and they'll come over and water your plants while you're gone. That's what friends do. If you're feeling down they'll drop by and chat for a while or invite you out. If there is something your friend can do for you or you can do for your friend that isn't some monumental task then I feel we all want to do it.

The sticky part comes (no pun intended) when both are single, I believe. Both miss the closeness of a relationship. The intimacy. The sex. If there is an attraction is sex more effort than stopping at the grocery store and picking up milk and bread?
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