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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?      Home login  
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 chadskylark
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 26
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?Page 2 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
well answer then. have you been in the situation i am talking about? it is hard to look at the woman you love lying naked next to you and know she has been sexually intimate w/ so many others before you. so many others have enjoyed her, she has enjoyed so many others. how do you see guys that she used to play with for just fun and feel nothing? sex is so intimate. how would you really feel unique?
it's weird to be w/ a woman that so many others have enjoyed. to me anyway. i feel like they own a little peice of her in some way. even if it's just memories.
i think my wife just got sick of the lack of security and decided to settle down w/ me. she loves me, but in the scope of things i am just another expierence.
don't you want to feel like your woman is kinda special? like it kind of took a little something extra to get in her pants?
 chadskylark
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 27
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 10:18:56 AM
maybe the idea i am trying to convey is [me anyway being in this kind of situation] is i have a hard time w/ thinking dudes that have had casual encounters w/ her may kind of think along the lines "don't think you are the only one that could/has got her she got naked for me many times". sounds dumb, but i don't know why i think this way.
would it bother you to know your mom or grandmother had been w/ 80-100 guys before they met your dad or gramp? would you like your son or daughter to know about your wifes past? if they found out, how would you feel?
 Bandito
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 28
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 10:24:11 AM
I never have asked the question really so I am a bit puzzled by the thread.

Number of past lovers is really something personal. My number is low...I was in a relationship for 23 years. What exactly does that mean...am I inexperienced?

My point is that numbers by themselves say nothing.

Judging people shows a lack of tolerance and respect.

Just my two cents,

Bana-dito
 chadskylark
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 29
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 10:38:18 AM
to me it's not judging, it just hurts to know. i am trying very hard to figure out exactly why, maybe then i can change my view and be happier in my marrige. have you ever expierenced this situation? i would NEVER have thought it would bother me, i love sex and thought i was very open minded. then when in the situation i cracked!
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 30
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 11:55:03 AM
COME ON, She a woman, a human being, not a used car, or hand me down pair of jeans !
You guys are looking at women like they are a posession rather than a person.
My approach is, you ain't never had anyone like this, you ain't never going to have anyone like this again !
 Marie287
Joined: 8/6/2005
Msg: 31
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 12:50:34 PM
So when men ask this question....we should lie?
 nipoleon
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 32
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 1:01:15 PM
Marie:

At your age, I can't imagine you have much to lie about.
 kce33
Joined: 6/2/2005
Msg: 33
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 2:28:39 PM
well I myself don't pay much attention to numbers now a days because of the total lack of dating knowledge by both sexes...... I see girls and guys running up the numbers by bad dating choices, most would look like a porcupine if they stuck out.....

better have a

kce
 chadskylark
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 34
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/1/2006 2:35:13 PM
have you ever had a long term love relationship w/ a woman w/ an extensive history? not just many boyfriends etc, but lots of casual encounters, some w/ people you know/knew? i am looking for someone who can relate....
 real12luv
Joined: 1/2/2006
Msg: 35
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/2/2006 7:33:01 AM
I'm with Lake on this one. I dont even wanna know where you been.
 chadskylark
Joined: 1/30/2006
Msg: 36
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:29:48 AM
what if it's too late and she already told you?
 jumpypants
Joined: 2/20/2006
Msg: 37
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/21/2006 10:09:20 PM
nipolean,

And a large number of women are batshit crazy, but do not seem so even to an eye that is looking for it. You mix smart + crazy and they can pass a lie detector.

I married one, and it was really bad, and ended with her having an affair.

Ironically, the sane ones tend to be the ones that openly discuss their past, but without bringing it up constantly if you are in a serious relationship.

This in essence is why many men care, or so I think, although the actual sexual odometer is not as important as how bumpy the road they travelled was.
 FantasyFlavor
Joined: 1/4/2006
Msg: 38
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 2/21/2006 10:40:38 PM
Any man who wants to be judgemental of me for whatever reason,
is not my type of man.Particularly judging me for the men I have
loved in my life.
 yaright14me
Joined: 2/17/2008
Msg: 39
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 6:42:40 PM
the only smart reply i've read so far ..... i never looked at numbers til i met someone i really cared for and it does bother me ... guys really do want to look at their women as being special not some other guys one night stand ....
 vahbsc
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 40
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 6:44:53 PM
women aren't supposed to do things considered masculine, like having multiple partners.

we're not supposed to fart, burp, shit, or sit with our legs open.

all that is bullshit.
 David Lewis
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 41
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/13/2008 11:15:56 PM
gotapulse wrote: Actually, most men and women don't
respect a member of either sex when they're promiscuous.

That's correct but a man who's had a large number of
high quality partners isn't promiscuous and is usually
more successful with women, dating and relationships
than a man who's had an average number of partners.
The same may not hold true for women.

Speaking only for myself, I've noticed after the fact that I'm not
attracted to women who've slept with lots of men, and I only have
serious relationships with women who've had, as far as I can tell,
fewer than average partners. Since I don't know beforehand how
many sex partners a woman has had, apparently something in her
personality or character is attracting me.

According to what I've experienced and heard about, sexual skill
is a direct function of the amount of practice you've had (all other
things equal). Whether you practice with a few partners or hundreds
doesn't seem to make much difference.
 Greg8002
Joined: 3/11/2008
Msg: 42
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 5:50:16 AM
I think the number of lovers a woman had alone, is not enough information to judge whether or not she is a good potential partner. One would need to know what sort of relationships she had. Also what is far more important is how the woman acts towards you in the present. The past is not always the best judge of what a person is like in the present.
 David Lewis
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 43
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 12:31:26 PM
I quoted you because you brought out a valid point,
and I wanted to explain an important distinction between
"promiscuity" and "having lots of partners".
 Blonde_charm
Joined: 9/18/2007
Msg: 44
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:02:54 PM
I have had men become disinterested when they learned my past number of lovers. And I say, good to know what your limits are and there are no hard feelings.

And I move along.
 xfoxybabe18x
Joined: 12/12/2007
Msg: 45
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 5:26:27 PM
I don't think it should matter. Some guys are full of themselves, i can't stand men who judge women like that.
 Mister Incognito
Joined: 3/3/2008
Msg: 46
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 5:29:44 PM

why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?



Because holes get loose.

I don't want to touch a vagina that can whistle in the wind.

funk that.


 plumpassion
Joined: 1/20/2008
Msg: 47
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/14/2008 5:44:04 PM
I have two words for you: double standard.
 acute_stimulus
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 48
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/15/2008 10:22:31 AM
Technically there should be no difference between a woman's numbers and a guys. You should only concern yourself with 1)if they are STD free and 2)how they like it:P
 David Lewis
Joined: 11/18/2007
Msg: 49
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/15/2008 2:18:18 PM
In another thread a woman said she felt like every time she
has another partner, her marriageability diminishes.
 simpleman20188
Joined: 8/11/2007
Msg: 50
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 3/15/2008 2:24:55 PM

but if we say we had some past lovers you think we are sluts., and not worthy for a relationship?

Huh???

You must look for the wrong guys.

I see women judging other women on this far more than men.
Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?