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Show ALL Forums  > Sex and Dating  > why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?      Home login  
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 leglover
Joined: 6/21/2007
Msg: 151
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?Page 7 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
i don`t even ask about such things or tell about my past lovers. who the hell cares? Some men want a virgin but please keep them away from me. i think many women have that false perception, most guys i know don`t worry about it. it probably comes from the same place as concerns about how many date before having sex, who cares?? if i`m just after sex i`ll leave after the 4th date if that`s what it takes or the 1st if that happens. My problem usually comes from a woman being to conservative sexually instead of being wide open and a lack of intellectual connection. let`s all graduate high school now.
 LovelyRiita
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 152
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/1/2009 9:40:34 AM

i don`t even ask about such things or tell about my past lovers. who the hell cares?

I learned a long time ago that most men do care especially if they care about you. The guys that don't care are the ones that aren't serious about you. If you tell them the truth they can either get angry or upset or walk away or deal with it. But you find out who cares and who doesn't.
 LakeCountyGal
Joined: 9/4/2008
Msg: 153
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/1/2009 9:51:41 PM
I don't care about his number as long as he doesn't care about mine. I don't tell it upfront, but I will be honest if he asks. If he has a problem with it, then clearly, he is not the right person for me. (and honestly, my number is pretty low compared to most people my age these days)
 urgreeneyes
Joined: 5/25/2007
Msg: 154
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/2/2009 4:55:11 AM
Who wants to buy a car with a lot of mileage? A woman that has been with many men has pshycological issues. Low self esteem, dad didn't love her, sexual abuse, attemting to fill a void, etc. She doesn't care about herself, that's why she gives it away so often. Yet in the end, she never feels better about herself. It goes both ways. Would a woman want to be with a man that has been with a lot of women? After being with a lot of women, do you think he can be faithful to one? If you just want to have crazy sex, don't ask. But if you want to have a long term healthy relationship, it's good to know. It helps put together the pieces of who you are really with.
 snglagain27
Joined: 3/24/2009
Msg: 155
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/2/2009 7:07:25 AM
It is dependent on the man and his comfort/confidence level. I personally enjoy an independent, experienced and confident woman and could care less her intimate history. What is most important is her sense of self, sensuality and ability to openly discuss her wants/needs in life and the bedroom. The beauty of intimacy in this age bracket is many years of practice and perfection. Intimacy is heightened when both parties can discuss their hot buttons and experience them together.

The men that have a tough time with a woman's intimate experience either has some inequality issues or some self confidence issues to address, in my humble opinion.
 shadowette
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 156
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:20:49 AM
Just don't ask, things like this are better left unsaid. I recently dated a guy who insisted on knowing a number, I told him and he had a real problem with it. The kicker of the whole ordeal is that he had slept with just about the same amount...how judgemental. Someones number doesn't bother me.
 m_church
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 157
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:31:40 AM

I recently dated a guy who insisted on knowing a number, I told him and he had a real problem with it. The kicker of the whole ordeal is that he had slept with just about the same amount...how judgemental. Someones number doesn't bother me.

So you found out early he was judgemental... no big loss....

And realistically "someones number doesn't bother me" usually only applies if you know the number and it's not above your personal "Yuckkkk" factor... If a guy had slept with 100 woman and he was your age would it bother you? How about 500? or 1500?
 shadowette
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 158
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/2/2009 10:53:57 AM
If a guy my age had slept with 100+...I'd be like 'wow, how did you manage that'. If I was dating him, we would be off to the clinic for some testing as I don't want to catch crotch rot.
 LovelyRiita
Joined: 5/23/2009
Msg: 159
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/4/2009 4:47:38 PM

If a guy my age had slept with 100+...I'd be like 'wow, how did you manage that'.

I guess I can't argue with that statement. LOL
 luckygreentiger
Joined: 1/5/2009
Msg: 160
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 12:37:26 AM
because no one likes to feel like they're going to be compared--and worry about what if those comparisons come up short.
 ThatGamerDude121789
Joined: 5/31/2009
Msg: 161
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:11:48 AM
I wouldn't care too much if you were clean and whatnot. But if you give me details....I might feel a little uncomfortable.
 daydreamer57
Joined: 4/12/2009
Msg: 162
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 6:15:33 AM
I dont judge woman on anything cept the way WE treat each other.....their past isnt really anything im concerned about as long as WE are enjoying.....
 Heathen Chemistry
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 163
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 6:23:28 AM
More men = more skanky! Simple!
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 164
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 7:08:57 AM

The guys that don't care are the ones that aren't serious about you.


So if a guy I'm dating somehow manages to find out that my past was pretty busy (for example) and then gets all angry and starts calling me a whore.. it's because he cares about me? Ridiculous.


A woman that has been with many men has pshycological issues. Low self esteem, dad didn't love her, sexual abuse, attemting to fill a void, etc.


She/He couldn't possibly just LOVE sex, right? Again, I say ridiculous.

I think anyone who asks or tells is a complete tool.

You have one responsibility to anyone you date.. stay disease-free and be able to prove it.
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 165
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 7:27:35 AM

Would a woman want to be with a man that has been with a lot of women?


If I were to find out that a man had 50, or more sex partners, the number would bother me.

Only IF I found out. I don't go around asking men about how many sex partners they've had.

Frankly, it isn't none of my business. Secondly, I wouldn't feel too comfortable with being asked such a question.


I learned a long time ago that most men do care especially if they care about you. The guys that don't care are the ones that aren't serious about you. If you tell them the truth they can either get angry or upset or walk away or deal with it. But you find out who cares and who doesn't.


I call pure nonsense on the sentence in bold. I know for damn sure that I could care about a guy, and not even bring up the question.

Just because people decide not to ask the question, doesn't mean they don't care, or aren't serious.
 m_church
Joined: 11/8/2007
Msg: 166
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 8:10:30 AM

The guys that don't care are the ones that aren't serious about you. If you tell them the truth they can either get angry or upset or walk away or deal with it. But you find out who cares and who doesn't.



I call pure nonsense on the sentence in bold. I know for damn sure that I could care about a guy, and not even bring up the question.
Just because people decide not to ask the question, doesn't mean they don't care, or aren't serious

How can you call it pure nonsense and apply it to yourself... the statement was from a GUY's point of view... you're a woman.....
 RushLuv
Joined: 4/16/2009
Msg: 167
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 8:22:37 AM
^^^It doesn't matter if I'm a woman. I viewed the statement as swinging both ways.

I don't buy into it that men, or women for that matter don't care, or aren't serious about their partner if they don't ask how many sex partners they've been with.
 belana
Joined: 2/29/2008
Msg: 168
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 8:37:33 AM
Thank goodness to snglagain sense at last. The main thing is that that if everything is clear on sexual diseases! the answer is easy! the males will not be able to judge if you tell them that it is my past and its none of your Bloody Business and if you dont like the answer just p...off you****ead.

Oh and to that so called Aussie twit on the beginning of this post he is not! Australian
as we do talk English down here... not some Gobbledygook like he comes out with.

Will someone else please adopt this pathetic little ponch! emphasis on the little.

 ohio07
Joined: 12/27/2008
Msg: 169
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 10:32:03 AM
Don't even ask, you don't want to know... really! This is like that Chris Rock joke:"Women don't count how many times they had sex, they count how many boyfriends they had. They aren't counting that guy they fvcked at the club, or that night they fvcked Bobby Brown, they did Bobby Brown backstage at the concert, or that guy they met in Aruba, heck that's another country... that don't count! I thought we were talking about "domestic d!ck!!!"

Jesus just asking her (or finding out about) what she did in college should be more than you'd ever want to know!!! Besides what if she's in her late 30's and 40's and had a certain number high or low... I mean what can you expect. You didn't know her for 30-40 yrs... Give the person a break! All you should care about is her health, that directly affects you... the rest is just how she treats other people and you. And that you should already know by then.
 Keiper7
Joined: 11/22/2008
Msg: 170
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 10:55:21 AM
I am not concerned about a specific number, as long as the women does not give it up for anybody, all the time. If I feel she generally gets to know someone before getting intimate, the number of times is irrelevant.
 Brenoso
Joined: 4/9/2009
Msg: 171
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 12:34:29 PM
People who ask are curious and our insecure about themselves in fear of being compared (not in a favorable light). I was like that a few years back. I always wanted to know. Now since I've grown and realized what I'm capable of, I'm not insecure in that department so it really doesn't matter. At least in that sense. Now I loved being compared, I usually end up being the favorable of the comparison. I don't ask though. I just let it all flowwwww

~Oso
 Going with the wind
Joined: 6/23/2009
Msg: 172
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 2:30:38 PM
it is so ironical that women would sleep with so many guys and dont like being called sluts(It is a part of same package babe). (same goes for guys too but in general women are more offended). They like the enjoyment but not the negative after effects.

Sluts= sleeping with many guys=sluts

Guys are more accepting of their behavior-" Yeah i slept with many girls, i know it was not right, but i did it just for fun.I was kinda slut "

Women do not consider what they did was wrong and try blaming guys -" there's double standard..blah..blah.., i am/was a slut but you can't call me a slut". " I slept with 5 men but dont judge me"

I dont mind if a girl/woman has been in LTR but if she has short term relationships that means her judgement is not good or she is sex kitten. For a 30 year old 2 relationships are ok but more than that puts her the category of slut, same for guys.
" It didn't work" is not an excuse for short term relationship.

The problem is if you start being in more relationships, the value of relationship is lost. Women will say"Oh i was fcuked by 5 guys, so what's wrong if I get fcuked by one more" Same with guys" What's wrong in fcuking one more girl".

My ex used to say "When I dated this guy..." all the time. I never felt special because she had done all the things with the other guys she had dated before.

The more partners you had in the past, the less you have to offer to your new partner.
People judge for what you have done. If you kept rolling like a baseless bowl, why do you expect respect from other people? I dont have respect for a girl who slept with 5 men and says "I love you". I will think " ok... does she really love me and even if she does, it's not new for her".
 Avalon1012
Joined: 6/23/2007
Msg: 173
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why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:09:25 PM
The little Devil guy on my shoulder made me post this…
Because most guys under 35 can’t count that high
When counting teeth…..Sorry dumb joke
 ItAllWorks
Joined: 12/2/2008
Msg: 174
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:11:25 PM
just don't want to be another whores victim
 ItAllWorks
Joined: 12/2/2008
Msg: 175
why do most men judge women by their number of past lovers?
Posted: 7/5/2009 3:12:34 PM
"The numbers should not matter"

really? what if you're so stretched out I might as well pull my****out in a warm room?
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