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 Double Cabin
Joined: 11/29/2004
Msg: 346
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?Page 4 of 33    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33)
If it were agreeable of course I would.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 350
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/21/2006 10:34:20 PM
Anyone that does not sign a prenup in this day and age is like the idiot that goes into business with just a handshake. This is especially true for men, since we are the ones who get raped in the courts.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 352
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/21/2006 10:40:00 PM
^ C'mon! The only thing you own in Canada is the deed to my heart.
 Avalon96
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 353
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/22/2006 5:47:33 AM
I think a prenuptial is a great idea, especially for older couples who have worked, and accumulated worth over the years. I am sure we all go into a marriage thinking we are with the person of our dreams, but the reality is a divorce rate of 50%. not really good odds. The person you face in divorce court, will have no resemblence to the person you married.
 jedwest
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 358
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 6:25:43 AM
In the end if someone divorces you then all the love, integrity, value and character won't matter. How many people get married happy and then change. The answer is approximately 60 percent. It's like placing your inheritance on a roulette wheel and being asked to choose red or black (50-50 chance). It's a fact. Proven over and over (a sad fact that is) that people change. I believe in forever unless a spouse is unfaithful to me (and even then I might give them another chance if they change). But you don't know that the other person will stay forever until forever happens. You can't make something a fact until it happens. You don't get health insurance hoping you'll need to use it. I wouldn't get a pre-nup hoping I would need to use it. It would only come into effect if someone was unfaithful to me. Maybe it should be called -change- insurance. In case a spouse -changed- their mind. Instead of keeping there vows of FOR BETTER FOR WORSE, FOR RICHER FOR POORER, IN SICKNESS OR HEALTH, TILL DEATH DO US PART. I saw a great example of love of a person I new in my church. His wife got alzheimers and for over 10 years he and his family took care of her at home. That's the commitment a marriage should have. (not that I would want anyone to have to go through that). As stated in other posts, the world we live in doesn't conform to the perfect ideology of marriage for a lifetime. I wish pre-nups were not an issue. But until the divorce rate gets back to about 10-90 it will be an issue. Does anyone think that will happen??? It's about the unknown. If both people plan to stay married to someone a lifetime, then signing a prenup should be ok.
 jedwest
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 359
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 6:31:23 AM
From one human to another trust is earned. Until someone stays with there spouse a lifetime there is no proof that they will. Unfortunate but true. Maybe though in some circumstances some would know. But circumstances change. How many people have you known that you said wow I can't believe THEY got a divorce?
 jedwest
Joined: 8/16/2005
Msg: 361
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 6:42:14 AM
If a woman has much to lose then maybe she should protect it with a pre-nuptial agreement.
I don't understand why a someone should leave a marriage if they do, with something that was not their's to begin with. It's like rewarding them for leaving the marriage. Crazy! If someone leaves a marriage with something the other person had before they got married that's messed up. It's saying, "here because your leaving me I will give you some of the benefits I got before I met you". If you don't stay in a marriage you don't deserve to share what the other person has. BUT, what you made TOGETHER while married, that wasn't based on inheritance, is a different story. I think that should be divided equally unless they were unfaithful to the marriage. Kick the unfaithful one out without anything that was new to the marriage. Man or woman.
 SteveHD
Joined: 3/9/2005
Msg: 362
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 8:24:54 AM

Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?


Sure...after me and her sat down took a long hard look at it and agreed on the terms that we placed, and took it to a lawyer to make sure we weren't shooting ourselves in the foot.

Then I'd say we renew once a year for the first few years. After the matrimonial bliss has worn off, I'd renew it less frequently and revise it after we had some kids. Eventually the pre-nup will evolve into a "will".

I'm all for "us" deciding the terms of agreement instead of acting horrified at a divorce.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 367
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 12:03:16 PM
Alexandria girl does a very good job of explaining things. Kudos!

That said, I would encourage all women (and men, in some cases) to sign these things like you would agree to a marriage contract - neither means much of anything. A decent lawyer can pick apart even the most seemingly ironclad of prenups during divorce proceedings. They are, essentially, worth less than the paper they're written on.

Even if the term (which should IMO be able to be extended, but they're not) hasn't expired, the spouse with the lesser holdings can lay claim to anything "protected" by the prenup. There's this funny little phrase called "marital assets" that makes prenups virtually wrothless. It not only pertains to assets acquired during the marriage, but also to assets shared during the marriage by the couple, regardless of which spouse brought the asset. This can apply to anything: Vehicles, vacation homes, businesses, investments/savings accounts, etc. And it doesn't take much for them to be considered marital assets.

Additionally, even if the spouse with her/his own attorney agreed to predetermined spousal support restrictions, they will never hold up in court and are categorically ignored during divorce proceedings.

So, sign away, folks. They mean NOTHING!!! But please, continue to get them. It's the easiest money an attorney can make.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 369
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 12:30:55 PM

^^^ BWAAAH, love it. JD candidate with healthy skepticism.


Yeah, I tend to fit in pretty well.

Funny little sidenote: A good friend of mine has been practicing family law for over a decade. After my divorce I told him that my attorney told me that before I do it again, be smart, get a prenup. He kind of laughed at the the notion. I inquired why. He said he always suggests them to clients, too, especially just after a divorce, even though he knows they're pretty much worthless. Easiest money he makes.

IMO, since rulings have come down against the practice of predetermined spousal support levels in prenups, they are a worthless piece of paper.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 371
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 12:51:15 PM

To me, marraige is forever. I won't get married until I find someone I can see myself living with for the rest of my life (not The One, but someone I coud feasibly grow old with), and once I do, I'll be damned if I don't get my diapers changed right along side that same person.


We all felt that way, darlin.
 lola_ca
Joined: 8/11/2006
Msg: 375
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/26/2006 9:09:51 PM
Funny Girl, just because you keep your name on things and his name on things does not mean that lawyers (and a disgruntled ex) could not still force you to sell anything that was purchased when the two of you were together. Regardless of WHO's name is on the title (or account or reciept)

As for Pre-Nups.....they are an awesome idea and I would NEVER get married without one. I have worked long and hard for the things I have in my life and I would not want a relationship gone bad to cost me the things that I had sacrificed for. Unfortunately in Alberta the court systems do NOT recognize Pre-Nups (unless things have changed in the last year or so) but they are still a good idea. It protects you and your partner.

Seriously....consider this situation.....

You win 50 million on the lottery.....a year or so later you meet the man/woman of your dreams and decide you want to marry and spend the rest of your lives together. Some years later (lets say 4) for whatever reason the two of you decide to split. Depending on the vindictiveness of your now ex they could come after you for half of EVERYTHING....meaning that 50 million that you have now turned into property, vehicles, investments (from money you had BEFORE you were married) they are entitled to half. Now if you had only got your ex to sign a prenup before you got married all of that money, property, vehicles, investments (or at least the majority of it, dependent on what was agreed to in the prenup) would still be yours.

WHY would you NOT want to protect your assets? Why would you want to allow someone to have half of soemthing that you either worked hard for or had earned prior to your relationship with them. Sounds quite silly to me.

But that is just my POV.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 378
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/27/2006 1:57:36 PM
It's funny to see so many women in favour of prenups now that they're making some money. I guess they finally understand the BS that men have had to put up with for decades.
 colt8301
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 382
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/27/2006 10:34:12 PM
you god-damn right I will, nobody is going to walk away with anything I earn with my own hands especially when i had my empire before I met them.
 whothehellknows
Joined: 7/23/2006
Msg: 384
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 8:12:55 AM
It depends on several things. If my partner and I are fairly close in our net worth, I would not ask for one. If things did not work out, then we both have our own means to go our seperate ways.

Now if my partner did not have anything to her name, I would ask for one. I have no problem dating people without many material things or a nice job, big bank account, etc., but getting more involved would entail some self protection. With very high divorce rates in the country I think you have to protect yourself and your assets.

I have spent many, many years slowly building my nest egg and preparing for my future. If I were to marry it would most likely be with someone who brought something similiar to the table. If not, then a prenup is a given.

It doesn't sound romantic, but neither does living in a run down apartment because your exwife took your house and half your retirement fund and your savings account.
 Chromie
Joined: 10/20/2006
Msg: 385
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 8:25:01 AM
In the situation I'm in currently with a brand new home that is paid for (was paid for with cash when I bought it 2 years ago) and a couple automobiles that are brand new and paid for, it would be mandatory for whoever came into my life that if we were to get married they'd have to sign a pre-nup. I will not get married again without one. Security measure...especially since I work my tail off trying to keep everything I have and make things better. Good thing my dad raised me to be independant and self-reliant because the way some men are I'm better off without them. I've been divorced nearly 7 years and when I married that first time I was young and stupid....He and I both were. You know how it is when you're young you think you know it all. Anyway...yes there's going to be a pre-nup for whoever comes into my life in the future.
 Chromie
Joined: 10/20/2006
Msg: 388
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 8:52:22 AM
Wow...First off it's not that easy.

Take for instance the situation I was in with my ex-husband. I was 19 he was 16. We got engaged 6 months after we started dating. We weren't married until 4 years later. Over the course of those 4 years we lived together for 3 of them. I was not allowed to go to the grocery store on my own, my mother-in-law-to-be lived next door and I worked with her so she could keep an eye on me while he was at work because we worked seperate shifts. I was 100 miles away from my family...when my brother graduated high school my fiance told me I couldn't go...I went anyway. He knew I'd never have told him anything of the sort. When he and I were seperated my grandmother passed away, he knew how terribly close I was to her, yet did he attend her funeral and be there to comfort me (as I had done for him through 4 funerals for his family)...no he did not. It was at that point I realized how much he actually "loved" me. He didn't. No amount of words he could've ever said and no matter what he tried...I knew in my heart of hearts he didn't love me like he said he did. There was no compromise coming from his end but yet I was bending over backwards for him.

It took the ending of that relationship for me to realize that if someone can't meet me halfway that there's no future. And I will not let someone take away from me what I worked so hard for. When I bought this house I'm in now (that I have no intention of leaving because it's paid for)...it was with money that I'd won from the lottery. Money that I won 5 years to the day that my grandmother passed away. I had no car, was working 60 hours a week, was about to lose my apartment because I couldn't pay the rent. It's hard as hell to live somewhere with a roommate and they up and leave and you're stuck with all the bills. I couldn't afford groceries...much less get my car fixed.

So if having someone sign a pre-nup makes me a bad person then by all means call me the Devil. I'm protecting ME...
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 393
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 5:17:49 PM
goes both ways....gold diggers can be male or female!



I love it when people (*cough* some women *cough*) say things like that! I guess it rings true to the extent that the following two statements do: violent rapists can be either male or female, or predatory pedophiles can be either male or female.
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 395
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 7:08:02 PM
in my mind there is never gonna be a divorce in my future so no need for property worries and damn prenups.


Again, we all at one time felt the exact same way. Personally, I'm against marriage all together and think it a complete waste of time. But for those so bold to venture down that path, sign the damn paper ... it's meaningless.

^^^ Hmm. Not really. You are comparing two things that are linked to testosterone to one thing that is linked to money.

Women can have money, and it's certainly been shown that men can want women for it.


Hmm ... disagree and agree. I disagree as to the aptitude women possess for violent behavior. In many African, native American and South American tribes, while men were the warriors, women were the ones who performed torture. The reason being that women tend to be more vindictive and they were better suited for a job. Think of it like this, when two guys have a problem, they're going to slug it out and share a beer an hour later. When two women have a problem they will share a grudge for an eternity seeking ways to constantly inflict pain upon one another. So, really, violence isn't gender specific.

As to your second point, I tell every guy I know to marry for money. The closer her income is to yours, perhaps it's even better (which is still rare - a 2004 survey showed that in 76% of married households, the man was still the breadwinner), the less you stand to lose (or even gain) in a divorce. Money can't buy love, but love can't by jack sh!t.
 Ron9
Joined: 8/10/2004
Msg: 397
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 10:07:40 PM
Or ............. you could do it like Ron9 Einstein did it.

Start building a new house - pay for it all but $20,000 - get married move new wifie and her two little girls in (paint still wet) and let the law make her 1/2 owner the same day.

Watch as she moves out and knowing she owns half of the house - wants you to sell it and give her her money.

Can we get a big ..................... DUH



subliminal message > old guys are good lovers not smart but good lovers
 Manseekscompanion
Joined: 11/25/2006
Msg: 399
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/28/2006 11:14:02 PM
Although I do not know how valid pre-nups are here in Australia, I think it is a good idea. The way society has become, and how Australia is becoming "Americanised", especially taking people to court for every rediculous reason, it is only reasonable to protect the assets I have worked hard for.

Besides, it really takes years to get to know someone properly, so even after you get married you are still learning about each other. Not to mention, there are con-artists out there. I have known personally a man who was married as long as the kids were home. When they left home, his wife took him to the cleaners.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 401
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 12/29/2006 4:32:09 PM
^^^ Hmm. Not really. You are comparing two things that are linked to testosterone to one thing that is linked to money.

Women can have money, and it's certainly been shown that men can want women for it.



Wow. First of all, wasn't it the feminists that claimed that men raped for "power" and not for any biological reason? All men have testosterone, yet the vast majority don't rape. Secondly, there are women who have raped and women who have been convicted of being pedophiles. Is testosterone the culprit in their behaviour?? Anyhow, the point I was making - which seems to have escaped you - is that in terms of sheer numbers, this is primarily a male problem as "gold digging" is primarily a female occupation. One could even argue that this behaviour evolved in females as it is seen in various forms throughout nature. In many animal species, the males put on a colourful display of features, aggression, etc in the hopes of enticing a partner and the females often select based upon the most suitable genetic phenotype. This is also a pattern that transcends all cultures, creeds, and religions in our own human race.
 workerbee68
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 411
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/2/2007 10:45:44 PM
Sorry, but divorce happens no matter how you may feel when you first get married. Things and situations change that may not even be your fault. But you may have to pay for it if you are not protected. I know from experience. That's why my divorce is still pending and I am probably going to loose half of what I have. Even though I know I will accumilate it back over time, it still upsets me that I will have to give up my assets that I had before we were married to her cheating a**!
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