Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 Mr. No games
Joined: 12/21/2006
Msg: 421
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?Page 5 of 33    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33)
How many marriages are held together for only the materialistic objects and finances?
...how many people struggle through bad relationships because they would financially devestated by the divorce?...I think the simplicity of the agreement is romantic in and of itself, you are saying I don't want you for your money, house, car...ect, I want you for you. How much more romantic can it get? The only factor that should affect or effect a marriage/relationship is the mutual love between two people...material objects are simply distractions worth removing from the start!
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 423
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/4/2007 12:03:00 AM
^ now that's funny!!
 Charm1ngMuse
Joined: 12/18/2006
Msg: 428
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/23/2007 1:09:39 PM
A prenuptial agreement doesn't necessarily have to focus on the division of assets in the event of a divorce. It is supposed to be a plan: a plan for your family creation; a plan to protect both of your assets; a plan to protect your businesses; a plan to protect your homes and to determine the direction the couple wants to move in, generally speaking.

Think of it more as a marriage plan (like a business plan) that grows with your family. You may have to make changes over the years as your goals and circumstances adjust, but that's all part of life. Perhaps you have triplets the second pregnancy instead of a single birth. Things happen and things change. You make adjustments. You compensate and I'm not talking monetarily.

The plan is to help identify the direction you BOTH want your relationship to take. That is what we should all do to help solidify WHY we want to marry one another. Write down your goals and desires and see if you're compatible. You may be surprised at how little you know one another. That alone could spare you a fateful marriage and painful divorce!

:)
 skydad
Joined: 3/29/2006
Msg: 431
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/23/2007 2:19:08 PM

Shouldn't be getting married of you don't know the person well enough to marry them


I can't agree with you funny girl. I was married at 18 and stayed married for 45 years. She left for greener pastures and took me to the cleaners. I am just about living in poverty while she has married a dude with money and living "high on the hog" I am retired and she took 1/2 of my retirement also. My kids made me promise them that if I ever got married again I wouldn't do it without a pre-nup. It doesn't mean I don't love the lady I am marrying, it just means that if she doesn't love me enough to not seek greener pastures that she won't take me to the cleaners also. Remember too, a pre-nup is two ways.....it can protect the assets of both parties.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 436
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/23/2007 8:07:48 PM
^ Ok Tolstoy, my ADD was kicking in, but still wholeheartedly agree with your post.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 438
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/23/2007 8:18:26 PM
I do the same thing with my PDA. I figure most people couldn't be bothered with wading through that much information, so when they gloss over my epic work they'll miss the BS I insert within it.
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 439
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/23/2007 9:43:15 PM
Lets say your in a business relationship with other family members. In most states everything becomes community property of the marriage. If a marriage does not last, it can throw a serious wrench into the business you jointly own with other family members. Tie up the operating capital and undermine the solidarity of that business for everyone concerned. It can force assets to be sold off to pay or re buy what you owned before the marriage.

Prenuptial agreements make more sense when there are large monetary assets you have worked for and gained before marriage or if either person has serious assets they have obtained from wise investments or inherited from family. In the case of a divorce, why should a spouse have the entitlement to what you had before you entered into the marriage?

Prenuptial agreements usually only address what each partner BRINGS INTO THE MARRIAGE...not what you jointly work towards or acquire after the marriage and that is how it should be.

I have known several people, in business, that for strictly business reasons, entered into prenuptial agreements before marriage. Usually concessions are given to the spouse signing away any claim to certain assets, in the agreement. One was a family farming operation and my g/f signed away her rights, in case of divorce or even death, in lew of his adopting her daughter and the daughter sharing same as his biological children and also his agreeing to a set amount of settlement in case of divorce. Also the family farming operation agreed to carry a million dollars in life insurance on the husband. In the mean time, the home they bought, the savings they personally had, their autos and personal possessions were not included and they jointly had the benefit of the income from the farm business. Whats so bad about that?

Actually if you go into a marriage with someone with lots of assets and you have nothing...it really protects you better than having to fight for what you might be entitled to rightly, in case of divorce, if you marry someone with financial means and contacts to give you a hell of a fight.....to obtain what is fair in a divorce. Properly drawn, it protects both parties. People need to educate themselves as to exactly what a prenuptial agreement is...before they make judgments or comments. JMHO
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 445
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/24/2007 1:09:31 AM
Signing a prenuptial agreement,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, If ur partner asked for it that mean he donot have trust for u and trust is the first stair of love and last is marriage


I love when women use this reasoning. Easy to say when 9 times out of 10, you're not the gender on the losing end. And it has nothing to do with trust. You're entering into an arrangement that has a roughly 50% chance of failing and when this happens, you bet your a*** that greed/anger/resentment/lawyers/etc. will ultimately persuade the great majority of women to go after the pot of gold. If it really has anything to do with love, then why wouldn't you agree to a relationship that is entered into fairly - one in which neither person has anything to lose except the comfort of each other?
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 449
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/24/2007 1:20:49 PM
What I find most amusing is the fact that women of means are the ones now in favour of prenups. Money sure has made them understand the male perspective. It also means that the BS rhetoric about it being 'unromantic' is a ploy that a lot of women of lesser means will knowingly use.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 451
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/24/2007 2:55:56 PM
Just look at Paul McCartney... He married that model with one leg and he had no prenup drawn up... His frist wife was the daughter of the KODAK owner... Look at the mess now...
She will get a lot of money just for having sex with him... Realy... Did she realy love him... I wonder... I bet her wealth was not anywhere near his either...


I can't believe how much that whore is asking for. If you ask me, she'll probably win a large amount of money from him even though she doesn't have a leg to stand on...so to speak.
 The Minister of Dudeness
Joined: 6/11/2006
Msg: 461
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/24/2007 9:53:14 PM
You can view pre-nuptial agreements as unromantic and taking the love out of getting married.

Or you can also view a pre-nuptial agreement as removing money as an issue and leaving love as the only remaining issue to focus on. In that sense, it is actually quite romantic in that it frees the parties to concentrate on maintaining the love without wondering what will happen as to the other issues if the love goes away.

Marriage IS a contract. In fact, it is a dual contract. It is a contract between the spouses as individuals with rights and obligations toward each other, and it is also a contract between the married couple and society.

So what is wrong or unromantic about a written method that defines contingencies in advance if the marriage contract(s) need to be interpreted and enforced by a third party (the court)? It seems to make sense to have one unless neither party has an appreciable amount of money and both spouses have nearly equal incomes.

And couples can sign ante-nuptial agreements (made after the date of marriage) if they want to.
 semper_vera
Joined: 10/25/2006
Msg: 467
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/25/2007 8:59:35 AM

do prenuptial agreements predisposition the marriage into a possible divorce?

I don't think that the prenups themselves are the major factor in the divorces of those who have signed them. I would venture to guess that prenups are most common where there is a considerable discrepancy between the financial situations of the two parties, in which case there are a number of stressors relating to different social classes, different upbringings, what have you.

Call me old fashioned, but I believe marriage should last an eternity, and I could never marry if I hadn't felt the purest of love. If I was going to get married, I would never sign a prenuptial agreement.

Consider the divorce rate. Do you think that all those people getting divorced figured it was going to end that way? That they didn't believe that what they felt was real and would last an eternity?

Perhaps some might say I'm blinded by my emotions, but what kind of love is it if your materialistic objects and finances are streaming through your head before you've even begun you've journey?

Just because love doesn't blind your reason doesn't mean that it isn't real love.

Hey, I don't have enough assets to make it worth signing a pre-nup! And I would probably feel a wee bit offended if it was suggested. However, if I was to marry a guy who was stinkin' rich and he wanted to protect his assets just in case, well, I would say that would be one sign of the level of intelligence and sensibility that probably attracted me to him in the first place! So, yeah, I would sign (after having my lawyer look it over, of course).

sv
 Mortavius
Joined: 1/17/2007
Msg: 468
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/25/2007 9:57:31 AM

I seriously don't think I'll be getting married. If having to sign a prenup is a requirement, I know I won't be getting married. It's insulting as can be because it says that he believes "money talks" when it comes to me. If that's what he thinks of me, I'm not the girl for him.

Hearts are bound by love, not contracts.


If you loved him, and never intended to leave him, then you would sign it. If signing your name to a document that states: "What's mine is mine, what's yours is yours, and what's ours is split down the middle" is too difficult for you to do, then how in hell do you expect us to believe you when you make the bold claims that all "lovers" make.... such as "I'll die for you", or even a classic like "I'd steal the stars from the sky for you".

Signing your name on an instrument that protects BOTH of us from the lies of ONE of us, is a far cry from dying or pulling a billion pound mass of gas over a distance of many light years.

Far simpler, actually.

So, I ask you then? What do you mean by "love binding hearts, and not contracts", when you refuse to protect the one you love from your own fickleness?
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 469
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/25/2007 10:32:33 AM
I don't think that the prenups themselves are the major factor in the divorces of those who have signed them. I would venture to guess that prenups are most common where there is a considerable discrepancy between the financial situations of the two parties, in which case there are a number of stressors relating to different social classes, different upbringings, what have you.


I would also venture a guess that a man who that requests and gets a prenup is also a stronger individual than the majority of pus5ywhipped, subservient husbands. He probably stands his ground on other issues and is not one of the "Yes hun, you're right, I'm wrong" types. In addition, men of means are more likely to have a higher self-esteem than those with very few means and are likely not to see their world revolve around another individual. I have met and known so many men in horrible relationships who won't leave because they believe there is nothing else out there for them.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 490
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/26/2007 4:49:04 PM
paris, I don't mean to question your version of events, but I have read that prenups can be ruled against if they are deemed to be grossly unfair towards one of the parties - ie. leaving one partner impoverished. Is there something missing from this story?
 JustCallMeMike
Joined: 5/29/2006
Msg: 498
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 1/27/2007 2:33:49 PM
Women, men, and the law alike has made it necessary for prenupts. Why should I have to pay give my ex money outside of what came into and was earned during the marriage? Why should I have to pay for the fact that she has a change in life style? I can understand maritial property and savings being split...But that should be a one time pay off, not me having to continue giving her money to live some place. Why should I have to pay to keep her in shoes and food? I thought we ended the marriage to break ALL ties with each other? And people wonder why there is a large number of exs killing the other and or their children. It is not just because they are like that, things drive people into acts of despiration and people are too blind to see it or too stubborn to accept it. And while I don't think it is right, I can see why exs kill one another.

Would I have a prenup? I might and do seriously think about it. I would make sure we both had one. What's her's is her's. What's mine is mine. Especially if it is property and money I have had prior to marriage.

Love has nothing to do with self protection. And while yes, we would like to think that our marriage will last forever, lets face it...Most of the people out there isn't willing to make the vows mean anything anymore. You don't like how a person has sex with you...You divorce them. They cheat on you, instead of working it out, you divorce them. The are sloppy and don't clean up after themselves, you divorce them. They are not making the money like I thought they would, you divorce them. So, why would any intelligent person put themselves at risk for the whimsical thing a marriage has become today?
 grasshopperme
Joined: 9/3/2006
Msg: 510
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/1/2007 6:21:32 AM
I would sign one only for the simple fact that if i loved someone so much i would want them o know that there money isent important to me. infact money is the number one problem in this world people never have enough or others dont have any and are starving. i grew up all my life with everything i ever wanted, to this day i money bothers me u look at rich familys are they happy sure they have everything but do they have love. money cannot buy love. i would have given all the things my parents always bought me back just to spend a lil time with them. So yes i would sign one
 tig53
Joined: 8/16/2006
Msg: 515
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/2/2007 10:20:49 PM
No problem with it. I've done it. The divorce rate is exactly why you do it. We ended up not married due to geographics. But people need to protect thierselves. It's bad(hard) enough when your heart gets reamed. Protect your ass-etts.
 catch22_
Joined: 2/28/2005
Msg: 521
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/3/2007 7:59:22 PM
only with the stipulation of sex every night.
 tick tock
Joined: 7/30/2006
Msg: 523
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/3/2007 10:47:12 PM
^ That would have to be a two-way deal. No headaches or other silly excuses.
 whisper67520
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 532
view profile
History
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/10/2007 4:26:03 AM
A prenup in no way diminishes the love two people have for each other. It only protects what one has worked hard to obtain before the marriage. Any business arraignments one might have with someone else, that may be jeopardized by a divorce or property held jointly with someone else other than the spouse.

In no way does it keep either from sharing the good fortune with the other during the marriage or using/sharing those assets in anyway either chooses. It only demonstrates that the marriage is based on love and mutual devotion, without material considerations, one way or the other.

What two people then accumulate during the marriage and even with the help of the assets of one or the other, then becomes community property and subject to division. Nor does it mean that with the death of the spouse, the surviving will not inherit all the assets. That is set out in a will and in most states a spouse can not disinherit the other of any assets, with out the consent of the other spouse, even with a prenup.

Also, when one spouse has a lot of assets, consideration is given, in the prenup, to the other, as to what substitute will be afforded, in case of divorce or the relinquishing of ownership to those assets.
 fallingbear
Joined: 1/25/2007
Msg: 536
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 2/10/2007 7:34:13 AM
I believe it is mandatory, get the money side out of the way, allowing freedom to really have a relationship. and separate what you build together, and what you started with.
3 months is all that is needed, of living together, to claim ownership of part of a partners assets. this should be taken out of relationships, it should be legislated to stop theft, from male and female partners.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >