Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 eddie0221
Joined: 2/2/2006
Msg: 2
I need help with this one???Page 2 of 2    (1, 2)
I think you are old enough to make the right decision. This is a no brainer! If you do not do drugs, why would put yourself in a position like that? Lets say he does whip out the pipe. Undercover cops (and they are all around those type of events) are right by you and see what's going on. Little miss innocent will be going for a ride as well! You are just as stupid for being around that!!
 prolibertate
Joined: 9/11/2005
Msg: 13
I need help with this one???
Posted: 3/27/2006 8:27:11 AM
Cally, asking him to assure you he wouldn't use any isn't controlling behavior, IMO...though *telling* him he would not be using any would be controlling. The first is expressing a concern you have; the second is trying to control what he does.

The main thing you need to decide is if you want to be with someone who does *any* illegal drugs at all. If he gets caught with anything, even pot, is it worth what he, and possibly you, may have to go through? Could you lose your house, car, etc. if he was caught? And more importantly, if illegal drugs of any kind bother you, then why date anyone who does any of them?

Also, if you know you should leave him, then why aren't you doing it? Don't be afraid you won't find someone else; because you will...and it will be someone who can actually appreciate you, without their mind being clouded by drugs. Life is too short to spend it with someone you know you shouldn't be with.

BTW, if you want to go to the festival, find some friends to go with; then you won't have to worry about anyone doing drugs.
 Bandito
Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 16
I need help with this one???
Posted: 3/27/2006 9:22:25 AM
As far as your SO, I think he was being honest with you saying he didn't think he would. It would have been irresponsible for him to promise he wouldn't when in fact it is futile to make such promises if you are already a drug user. Its like someone consuming heavy amounts of alcohol and promising they won't drink and drive. The fact is that when your in a heavy drugged or drunk state you are totally irresponsible and capable if anything in my books.

Now with respect to the crack users. It would have been fine to say I don't want to be near or travelling with a person that is using crack...period...that is your right. If your SO wants to that is his choice. The controlling part would come iun only if you didn't "allow" him to go or travel with May, regardless of your choice to go.

Dating a heavy drug user, even if its only pot, is frought with issues as you are forced into a controlling position being the responsible member in the relationship. If you don't feel comfortible in that role...don't date a alcoholic or heavy pot user.

Just my two cents,

Bandito
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >