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 eastbelle
Joined: 11/22/2010
Msg: 51
Dating while unemployed?Page 3 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)

if you're a woman and unemployed, you can still possibly get dates. if you're a man, FORGET IT! the majority of women are materialistic today and if they find out you don't have a job, they'll avoid you like the plague. best wait until you land another job.


I wouldn't turn down a man just because he is unemployed. It depends on the circumstances. There is a difference between being unemployed due to the economy vs being lazy or unproductive.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 52
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Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 9:25:18 AM
if you're a woman and unemployed, you can still get dates if you're a man,FORGET IT!


That is not true an unemployed woman and man can get a date as long as it is balance on energy (money and actions are energy) contributions. If a man would say ,"Sweety pie will you foot the meal/movies bills,(my company) /mytoothpaste and mouthwash/soap (my sex scent appeal for you Babe)my cashflow can't cover these,because of my children's support/alimony/my apartment rent/car payment/ect.. There are two answer on that yes and no. If yes ,Bingo !!!!The woman owns you and she can treat you like a meat. and that goes with unemployed women too..
I met few man while I was unemployed for coffee and sodapop, but I never tell them of my temporary situation because that is a weakness...

vvvvvvvv Rarebird,if I am your age I'll hire you as a Body Guard ,like Whitney Houston in that movie Bodyguard hehehehe
 Rarebird76
Joined: 5/10/2009
Msg: 53
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 9:43:09 AM
My resume sucks and I'm not exactly a 'people person'. Who wants to hire me? Exactly. It's alright though. I'm used to it.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 54
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 9:53:44 AM

if you're a woman and unemployed, you can still possibly get dates. if you're a man, FORGET IT!

Perhaps men should be a bit more discerning about this? It's not our fault if men are less picky about it than we are. We're more than fine with men being a bit more selective about it to make it even...
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 55
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 10:30:33 AM
^^^Because I think men should require women to have jobs, cars and a place to live in order to be considered for dating? The only way that makes sense is if the golddiggers were men.

Wait...are they? Either you don't comprehend well or you're mad I'm sticking up for men because it gives them less to whine about.
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 56
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Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 11:30:27 AM
^^^^^^^^ You are not a big guy with muscles and pack abs, but you got a big brain who knows reality and balance in life...
Amazing!! A delicate pretty face woman can outweigh a big guy's mind and his tacky opinion..
Iam with you on this..
 StevieCashmere
Joined: 4/22/2009
Msg: 57
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History
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/27/2010 2:21:50 PM
Dating is so passe ~ meeting a Online friend is Real Life Value

Thus Cost becomes immaterial and compromise as part of he whole pioint, mutual enjoyment of company

~Stevie
 sweetiepie1618
Joined: 9/14/2010
Msg: 58
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/28/2010 7:58:42 AM
I considered giving up dating because I had to leave my job to go to college. I not going to lie, I felt like a loser not having a paycheck come in every other week. But it is different for women I think. Society still wants men to be the providers, so a guy without a job doesn't seem like a good prospect. However, I think it really depends on the age of the person. A guy who is the OP age has experience. He has worked and has the knowledge, skills and background that will help him land a new job easier. Whereas someone who is my age, I would be more concerned. They probably don't have that much experience behind them. But you never know.

But honestly I do get concerned when I see a guy who is in their 20's who is unemployed and isn't a student. If they are in college or university, I would definitely give them a chance. They are doing something to better themselves. But I have a few friend's who are 21 and have never worked ever. And they don't plan on doing anything any time soon. I just don't want to end up supporting someone. I think there should be somewhat of an equality in a relationship. If you go to school or work, so should the other person.
 eastwood969
Joined: 12/21/2009
Msg: 59
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/28/2010 11:51:50 AM
I put dating on hold because I am underemployed. Own my own business but expenses are so high and business is so slow. It's one of the side effects from other people being unemployed. It's either we all work or we all suffer.I haven't had any rich women approach me since the day I was born so I am pretty sure that would be my only way to even consider dating and it won't ever happen.
 bikenurse7
Joined: 11/21/2010
Msg: 60
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 11/30/2010 4:13:46 PM
I recently was emailing with a man that moved to florida and thought that opportunities would just fall in his lap..He is living in a relatives vacation property (for free), while he finds work..
While I admire his positive attitude about dating while unemployed, I have a problem with a 50+ year old man not owning his own home and not having any money (he told me he is broke due to a divorce).
I cannot see becoming involved with this scenario at my age (52). I will probably remain a single woman and frankly, Im ok with it.
 tie_me_up81
Joined: 3/30/2010
Msg: 61
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 1:29:30 AM
^^ money comes before heart. The story of today's typical shallow women
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 62
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Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 4:36:22 AM

^^ money comes before heart. the story of today's typical shallow women


This is a word from a man who is nothing and who has nothing. He doesn't know that necessity of one self cost money. I would rather be called a shallow woman who works hard to impressed a" man " of her accomplishment in life by using her mind and effort, than using her heart and supporting a man of his necessity.
 S.O.U.L
Joined: 11/23/2009
Msg: 63
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 7:09:00 AM
^^ money comes before heart. The story of today's typical shallow women

Dude your ridiculous. Love doesn't pay the bills. If your unemployed and have the means to help pay for dates and entertainment (this goes for men and women) then there is nothing wrong with dating with out a job. On the other hand if you're expecting someone else to wine, dine, and entertain you on their dime while you contribute nothing....then your being unreasonable.

I wouldn't knock a 50 year old woman who has her stuff to get together for not wanting to get with a with a 50 year old man who has the same standard of living as a 20 year old. There's something serious red flags there.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 64
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 9:53:25 AM
^^^^ if your date has no money you find things to do that are free, you don't just say screw you I am not not dating you because you have no money, that is shallow and very childish and shows that you obviously do not care about your date.

There are lots of other things someone can contribute to a relationship and if you need more then love and companionship then you are not ready for a relationship.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 65
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 10:32:58 AM
^^^Agreed. Since love is what it's about and money doesn't matter and "heart" comes first - each person should contribute to their own expenses, and when they can't, they don't create any, or volunteer to take time away from things that might create expenses. If you're dating someone who doesn't have any money, then you date at that level - and do things that don't cost anything. I'm sure no one would want the burden of obligation for the other person covering them.

When I'm broke I don't date - so unless someone wants to do dating that costs nothing, I'll pass on dating unless/until I can cover my end. I extend potential dates the same courtesy. I'm proud and I'm sure I'm not the only one.

If it's about love - then money needs to come out of the equation, on both sides unless someone insists on paying for everything, and the other person can deal with it.
 jsphn11
Joined: 12/24/2007
Msg: 66
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 12:23:28 PM

If men find unemployed women more acceptable than women find unemployed men acceptable, this is proof that men are the less shallow gender in this aspect. To say a man is wrong for some evil cause in this matter is highly laughable



if you're a woman and unemployed, you can still possibly get dates. if you're a man, FORGET IT! the majority of women are materialistic today and if they find out you don't have a job, they'll avoid you like the plague. best wait until you land another job.


This is as old as the world itself. In general, women are less forgiving of a man’s low socio-economic status, and men are less forgiving of a woman’s not so hot appearance. If this is shallow then both genders are guilty…
 S.O.U.L
Joined: 11/23/2009
Msg: 67
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/1/2010 7:08:48 PM
If your an adult with no money then thats something I have to question. How are you supporting yourself? What about saving? What are you doing to be self sufficent?

Money is one of the reason marriages end in divorce...so you cant dimiss it's importance.
 BoonDockSaint73
Joined: 3/29/2010
Msg: 68
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 10:59:38 AM

if you're a woman and unemployed, you can still get dates if you're a man,FORGET IT!


whatever bro....you don't know women if you think that. women fall for me all the time who have not a dime to their name. you just gotta be a shinier piece of bait.

a woman will give her last nickel for a man that she's into. its just that simple. you need to learn this about women.

do women prefer men who are employed? sure- because as has been said, love don't pay the bills...PLUS...women seek security in a potential husband.

typically an unemployed man is a man who is not "of good value" to keep a job. With today's market, that is not necesarily so- yet, women use a man's work status to determine what type of a man he is.

ie - is he intelligent, dedicated, driven, passionate about himself? does he have ambition? men who have these attributes, are typically men of higher value. women want men of higher value.



money comes before heart. The story of today's typical shallow women


would you date a fat, ugly woman? because after all we men are soo deep that heart comes before looks right?
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 69
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 12:22:12 PM

How is it necessarily SHALLOW for a women who has her life in order to not be willing to settle for less than a man who ALSO has his life in order? As a secure, home-owning woman with a successful career, investments, financially independent, etc.....why would I be considered "shallow" if I seek out a man who is in a similar boat?
!

Because you are suppose to love someone for who they are and they are all about, not how much money they can spend on you.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 70
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 12:55:30 PM

Where did I state or even thinly IMPLY that I expect ANY man to spend money on me?


by stating those requirements implies that because if you didn't require that you would not care if your date had a job or not
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 71
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 12:57:21 PM
When it comes to money and relationships, you may not want someone to go after your money when you date. Therefore it's also not cool to expect to cost THEM any money. So the person who says it's wrong to expect someone to spend money on you should also agree that it's wrong for someone to expect YOU to spend money on THEM. Obviously that theory runs in both directions, and would have to in order for anyone to want to consider it.

Also, if a person says that money shouldn't matter in a relationship - they should agree that it's only fair to take money out of the equation. The only true way for that to happen is for both people to be on equal financial footing or at the very least, self sufficient. You can't say in one breath that how much someone has shouldn't matter and then follow it up with saying that someone who can't take care of themselves deserves consideration by the same standard. It's a lopsided theory, usually favoring the person who may not have as much.

I don't want anyone to come along and cost me money in a relationship which means I'm keeping money out of the equation. I'm financially straight when single, and expect to maintain that in any relationship I get into. As a courtesy, I don't expect anyone to pick up my tab, either...and I make sure they never have to. So in my life, money and relationships truly don't mix.
 Sabrosura089
Joined: 11/29/2009
Msg: 72
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 1:18:27 PM
Personally, the last thing I'd have a desire to do if I were unemployed is date. I'd be concerned on how my rent/mortgage/utilities/food, etc.....would be paid. Therefore, my focus would be on securing a job.

Love is awesome, but it doesn't pay the above/squat. You will find yourself on the streets in a heart beat!
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 73
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 1:28:12 PM

I was once laid off for 3 months (my entire department was outsourced) and the absolute furthest thing from my mind was dating. Being jobless during that time was like its own full-time job; sending off resumes, going for interviews, networking, meeting with potential leads, etc etc. I spent 8 hrs a day, Mon to Fri, trying to find another job and "having fun" and dating was on the bottom of my list and I don't imagine I would have been a whole lot of fun myself, when I was so stressed about finding another job. Once I found something, then life resumed as per normal and I resumed dating. I can't imagine wanting to pursue any kind of relationship when one's work-situation is in such limbo.


Personally, the last thing I'd have a desire to do if I were unemployed is date. I'd be concerned on how my rent/mortgage/utilities/food, etc.....would be paid. Therefore, my focus would be on securing a job.

Love is awesome, but it doesn't pay the above/squat. You will find yourself on the streets in a heart beat!

Exactly. How dateable is a person who'd prioritize seeking dates when they aren't sure how they'll pay the bills? To me it's not about their money or lack of it, it's about the mindset. I won't click well with a person who'd WANT to date (or who'd feel right dating) when out of work, because I don't feel right doing so when I'm in the same situation. Two people that feel dating is important even when you can't cover the cost of living are made for each other, and that's fine. Not my deal, though.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 74
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 1:31:22 PM
such that if summer vacation time is coming and I'd like him (of course, my boyfriend) to come with me, that I have to PAY FOR HIM?


If you wanted him to come that badly you would pay or you would choose a cheaper/free option.


of it once in a while I'd like (as couples do) us to go out for a nice dinner or see a movie......that because he has no job/income, that I have 2 choices...............never go out anywhere with my significant other OR half to pay his way like he's a little child and I'm his Mommy?


I don't see it as you being mommy, I see it as if you loved and really wanted to go with him you would pay his way or choose a cheaper/free option as I said above.


So according to you though, a woman should be more than content to PAY THE WAY of her man because it's only love that matters.


Again for the third time if you loved your man you would not care one bit about paying or trying to find another option that works for you instead of stubbornly saying this is where I want to go and if you can't come I am leaving you behind.

Bottom line is that if you really loved the person you would be finding a way to make it work no matter what the situation instead of giving up from the get go.

Now I do agree that if your guy has debts and has no job, you are not required to pay that but if he is debt free and has no job and you are still not dating him because that then you are shallow.
 Apollodorus
Joined: 11/24/2009
Msg: 75
Dating while unemployed?
Posted: 12/5/2010 2:29:02 PM

let me ask you this. What about a scenario where a man OR woman is unemployed and is not taking ANY active steps to secure employment again.............they're content to live on welfare or live rent-free in Mommy and Daddy's basement and just spend their days having a good time, no responsiblity, no financial obligations, a free ride. Do you also believe that in a case like this that a prospective date/partner should just disregard their lack of ambition or desire to get back up on their feet as an adult............all for love?


why not? just because a person is living in that scenario does not make him a bad person however most people in that kind of scenario are there for a valid reason.

You do not know the persons personality until you have met them and dated them for a while. you are making assumptions before you even know they guy.
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