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 AUTHOR
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 51
women on this site are kidding themselvesPage 3 of 27    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27)
We aren't looking for some perfect guy with no baggage because they don't exist!! We are looking for someone that has the qualities we are looking for!! Why should anyone settle for anything other than the "perfect person for them"?

"Perfect person for them" -- that's the key thing where the whole debate stems from. I think it depends on what they think of when it comes to "perfect for them" -- which can either be perfectly normal, or just be a variation of "perfect in the eyes of many". Many women, unknowingly (saying such a statement can offend, I know) judge what's perfect for themselves by what's at least a 'great' in the eyes of their friends who have what they consider good taste/judgement. Same when it comes to men -- but to varying degrees, just like anything else. So, it's indirectly in accordance with "the perfect guy". I think this is a step-up from a woman openly focusing on "the perfect guy", don't get me wrong.

I think the real concern is that a lot of guys get frustrated, when they see too many women prevent themselves (thanks to a certain mentality, permanent or temporary) to find a guy "perfect for them". I believe anyone, guy or girl, whose *firsthand* focus is to "find an awesome catch", literally can't. It's not about that notion being the #1 concern -- it obviously shows they've got problems and will always look for damaging flaws, etc. They will always be comparing and contrasting against guys they've had before or guys they've liked, etc -- and be running around in circles. As a guy, I've done the same - so I'm not going off about the subject -- I've been there without realizing it for a while! :)
 MeowDude
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 52
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/12/2006 7:16:21 PM
women are more idealistic than realistic; hence, the reason why many women play the victim so well
 MeowDude
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 53
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:15:10 AM
i am saying that women are involved in more wishful thinking than men are...they think they can change human nature especially the nature of man...what they can do is try to maintain their control of the man but that's about it......WWF is the male version of all my children
 MeowDude
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 54
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:16:28 AM
so I must be dishonest and not forthcoming in my statements just to attract a woman? So you are saying that dishonesty pay offs? Perhaps in the short term but I am trying to meet long term objectives and that requires a lot of honest on my part
 MeowDude
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 58
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 1:53:59 PM
"Everyone has their own opinions and are definitely entitled to them"

You just answered own question...lol
 MeowDude
Joined: 4/14/2006
Msg: 59
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 1:57:36 PM
sure why not....it's the truth
 Billbug
Joined: 1/2/2006
Msg: 60
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 6:33:12 PM
Xavi..

There are lots of perfect men out there...just that they're all in Australia....lol
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 61
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women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 8:57:35 PM
Pobody's Nerfect!!

C'mon we're all human. No one is perfect, and I don't expect to marry a perfect man. Perhaps he'll seem perfect only in my eyes because of the high level of compatibility and willingness to accept his imperfections. I am far from perfect--I have an incurable weakness for chocolate. Chocoholics Anonymous anyone?????
 Billbug
Joined: 1/2/2006
Msg: 63
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/13/2006 9:22:13 PM
"Good things can take a long time.
Anything worth having is worth waiting for.
If you aren't happy with yourself, how can you be happy with another?
Everyone gets lonely, even in a good relationship.
Jump hastily and you may regret it for a lifetime.
Need I go on?"

Chosen Lady...

Yes, and if you have several lifetimes it is a great philosophy. Meantime, you will be sitting on this site waiting for Mr Perfect, or what you perceive to be Mr perfect to you, at 80 years of age. As for me, I may meet the imperfect woman, but I will try to take the rest of our lives working out how imperfect our marriage is. But we will be working for the same goal while others are still searching for their soulmates.
 Billbug
Joined: 1/2/2006
Msg: 67
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 5/20/2006 3:54:48 PM
[However I wouldn't want "Mr. Perfect". I want a good man someday that we can enjoy each other's company, trust and depend on one another, share the good and bad times, relate on spiritual/intellectual/sensual levels. It may take even longer than 80yrs then, because I'm not even looking for my "soulmate" yet, only looking for friendship at this time. But you see Billbug, whether I ever find him or not, I am living in the moment...enjoying each day and I am happy. If he show's up, it will be the icing on the cake. Blessing, Pat ]

Well in your case it seems to be a moot point. I guess we are all here for different reasons...I would not like the rest of my journey through life alone. That is my preference, as yours is being quite happy on your own. But most people come on this site to find a lifelong partner, so I guess it means we basically want the same thing. The only difference is that some people are too fussy and assume they will find their soulmates. I do not believe in soulmates, just a good person who is prepared to make a go of sharing their life. A bit like saying if I don't have a Rolls Royce then I'll walk....lol. Regards, Bill.
 dreaminglite
Joined: 6/2/2006
Msg: 68
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women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/7/2006 3:13:52 AM
Do we still live in a world where age differences matter??? I am a single lady, however, I did have a wonderful relationship with a man 30 years my senior....and it was wonderful in ALL aspects. I had no issues with the age-gap and neither did my friends or family. Sadly, it made HIM uncomfortable as he felt that strangers felt as you do...that I must have been "after him for his money" or he was a "dirty old man". Neither were true.....we met on an intellectual level and were both interested in literature, art, plays etc. Sadly he passed away 2 years ago and he never resolved the societal issues of "age differences" in his own mind. How sad!!! I still believe I am more compatible with older men...and I am NOT a gold-digger!
 justmeinnc05
Joined: 8/12/2005
Msg: 69
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/7/2006 6:23:06 AM
I am not looking for perfect, not even close to perfect. I do not even know or understand what perfect means. I do know that in the past that I have settled for men that weren't right for me, and have had plenty of time to wish I hadn't. So yes I am looking for the one that is perfect for me. Yes, I have a mental list of what a man needs to be, in order to be the right one for me, and yes it is a very long list.
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 70
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History
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/24/2006 8:19:56 PM
No one is perfect, but we don't have to put up with guys with DUIs, criminal records or histories of domestic abuse. The key is integrity. Pobody's Nerfect, right?
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 72
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:21:14 PM

But most people come on this site to find a lifelong partner, so I guess it means we basically want the same thing. The only difference is that some people are too fussy and assume they will find their soulmates.


I can only speak for me ~ but I am NOT here looking for a relationship. If I were here looking for "him" I would not only be picky, I'd be extremely picky. I am certainly not going to settle, nor should anyone else.


women on this site are kidding themselves


I love that!! It would be much more realistic however, if it said: men and women on this site are kidding themselves!!!!
 kimmie38
Joined: 5/26/2006
Msg: 73
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:23:21 PM
He doesn't have to be perfect,just not a user n a liar!!
 atrkyhntr™
Joined: 12/20/2005
Msg: 74
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women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/25/2006 2:49:02 PM
I see nothing wrong with a woman or anyone
shooting for the one that makes them complete
and settles for nothing less...
We should all be so lucky someday
 trustyn
Joined: 6/27/2006
Msg: 75
women on this site are kidding themselves
Posted: 6/27/2006 9:31:55 PM
You know, you should really rethink your thinking!!! You are ****ing about women, but I bet you have come across PLENTY of good women, but you probably thought nothing of them!!! They were probably too big, too small, too cute or too ugly, out of your race, etc. so you blew her off. You don't know what kind of package your gift is coming in. Take time to see what's in that package. Men kill me complaining about women and how they expect too much, blah, blah, blah, but you all dismiss the best thing that ever happened to you because you think you can always find a woman who: cooks better, the sex is better, she understands me better, she gives me more freedom, she looks better, her boobs are bigger, her body is better, etc. Hey, get with a good,decent woman who treats you good and is there for you and be content with the little, short time that you have on this Earth. And let me let you in on a little secret: (7 times out of 10) IF A MAN TREATS A WOMAN LIKE A QUEEN, SHE WILL TREAT HIM LIKE A KING. IF HE IS ABOUT HER, SHE WILL BE ABOUT HIM. IF HE TAKES CARE OF BUSINESS, SO WILL SHE. IF YOU TEND TO HER HEART'S DESIRES, SHE WILL TEND TO YOUR HEART'S DESIRES....EVEN THAT FREAKY SHIT!!! SHE WILL DO THAT SHIT FOR YOU, OKAY?
My name is Trustyn and I am running for 1st black, female president
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