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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income      Home login  
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 Angel_73
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 26
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high incomePage 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
I would take the sweet guy over the other any time. As long as he makes enough money that hes not with me hoping i can support him or pay for everything lol Even if that means he works at McDonalds
 Souljah667
Joined: 11/19/2007
Msg: 27
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 3/13/2008 10:35:11 AM
Is the love stonger then your desire to be rich?

If its true love it should be. If not you may want to reconsider whats important in your life.
 MajorThomas
Joined: 2/10/2008
Msg: 28
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 3/13/2008 4:31:57 PM
So I'm guessing your low income but want women to like you because you're nice?

and income has no correlation on whether a person is nice or not, more often then not extremely low income individuals come from broken families and lack values that lead to abusive relationships.
 sugardol
Joined: 12/1/2004
Msg: 29
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 3/13/2008 4:36:28 PM
Sweet guy, low income, any day of the week! I've had enough of abusive guys, physical OR emotional. Homey ain't playin' none of that. I'll treat him like a king, but ONLY if he treats me like the queen I am. A guy who is abusive has low self-esteem himself, thinking he has to lord it over somebody to feel like a 'man'. I've always said, if anybody has to walk over someone to make their self feel big, they're mighty small. We are to compliment each other's lives, not rule over them. Puleeze!
 loverboyt66
Joined: 9/30/2008
Msg: 30
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:41:39 PM
The women proberly stay with, the guy because 1 she loves him, or too she thinks it not worth leaving him , as their are children, and the living style will be a lot lower as far as cash at hand.P.S. just some of the reasons.
 zephyrmoon
Joined: 5/30/2009
Msg: 31
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 6/12/2009 6:47:38 PM

Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income

What a stupid, dumbass question.

Gawd, thank you, I thought I was the only one.

No one is going to deliberately choose to be in an abusive relationship. Everyone THINKS they're getting the wonderful, charming guy when things start out.

It's once people are hooked that the abuse begins.

So yeah. Stupid question. If you want more women to choose you, presuming you're the adorable, sweet but lower-income guy in this equation, why not go back to school and get a degree? You can even do it online at night these days while breaking your back as a day laborer -- sorry, I mean a "SWEETACOLOGIST", a job with no health insurance benefits or future.

Then you can be the sweet, adorable and decent-income guy.
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 32
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 10/27/2009 1:24:14 PM
If all she wants is your money... marry her; she'll get atleast half on the way out.

If all a guy is good for is money, is like saying all a girl is good for is sex.
I dont see either one of those making it past a hot summer vacation.
 techgirl27
Joined: 9/5/2005
Msg: 33
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 10/27/2009 2:08:03 PM
NEVER anyone abusive, I don't care what he makes. What people make changes throughout time, but people especially abusers don't change.
 OutMind
Joined: 2/13/2007
Msg: 34
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 10/27/2009 2:53:48 PM
this whole thread is wrong because of one simple premise. Most women will tell you that the want the nice guy that treads them right and all the blah, blah, blah and then the meet one guy that rocks their world and it turns out to be the controlling jerk that treads them like sh it and all they said goes out the window.

So women need to look at who they actually attract instead of what they pretend to like.
 spunkybum52
Joined: 9/8/2009
Msg: 35
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/15/2009 9:45:34 PM
I don't even have to think about this one..... my answer is the sweet guy with no money. It's not worth all the money in the world if he abuses you and doesn't treat you with respect. You have to respect yourself, and women who put up with jerks not treating them right just for the money have a real problem. The problem is actually with the woman.....she just can't leave. I met a guy who was really rich, but he treated women terribly. I knew this, but he asked me to go out on a date, which I did. He was ok for the first couple of times. Then he started swearing at me and talking really badly to me. I got up, told him I don't need this in my life, and he didn't deserve me and walked out on him right at the restaurant. He ran after me and told me he would give me $1,000 if I came back that night. I laughed in his face and told him what to do with his money. Only desperate women put up with this.
 Applette
Joined: 4/13/2007
Msg: 36
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/16/2009 11:39:58 PM
Abuse is abuse ... with or without money
Nice guys finish last because they have no confidence in themselves and it comes across loud and clear!
Women would be more attracted to men with quality attributes if only they showed strength of direction and took more control.... women do not want to make all the decisions or control their guy. Well at least I don't.
 452
Joined: 11/1/2009
Msg: 37
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/17/2009 12:28:04 PM
How about a decent guy who makes a decent wage. Or better yet how about a sweet,kind guy who makes a high wage. Why does it have to be one or the other. I have met plenty of nasty men who make only a small wage.
 karma1160
Joined: 6/10/2008
Msg: 38
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/17/2009 2:43:28 PM
Seriously I am surprised you think so little of women that you feel you have to ask this question.
 Merrylass
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 39
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/18/2009 10:09:10 PM
My fondest wish is that every thread ever written on every forum everywhere about the mythical 'nice' guy scorned for the mythical (insert pejorative here) guy would disappear, thereby removing the largest pool of whiny BS that has ever existed.

Bottom line, the 'nice' guy usually has no idea that/why he's not that 'nice' at all and he's too self-adoring to realize the so-called 'jerk' has a couple thousand better characteristics. If you weren't jealous, you'd think him a great guy.

BORING!
 PirateJohn09
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 40
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 11/20/2009 7:51:24 AM

This is a question I've been wondering about for some time now. Would a woman be with a sweet guy who was responsible and not looking for a handout and would treat her with all respect, affection, love etc. but didn't have a thick wallet or would you be with a guy who had money to spare, but treated you like trash and disrespected you and abused you? I also ask this question because I've known many woman to be with an abusive guy even though he DIDN'T have money.....go figure.

These kinds of either/or questions are a bit ridiculous. It's a lot like the women who ask the men, would you rather be with a woman who was good-looking but had no personality or a woman who was unattractive but very sweet.

I'm not going to settle for someone who has less than what will make me happy, and I would expect any woman worth having would say the same about any man she might potentially be with.
 Hoomondog
Joined: 4/23/2016
Msg: 41
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 4/27/2016 3:50:31 PM
I am a 50-year-old man on a low income, less than 25,000 a year. I am also slim, although I don't really consider myself a weakling, or a wimp. I am positive, but I also know a lot of women do look for a man with a high income. We low-income guys have rights, too! Isn't there a woman out there who would want a man JUST AS HE IS?? I am looking for that kind of woman. A woman with a steady income that's NOT TO MUCH HIGHER than mine? Who wouldn't think anything of his LOW INCOME?
 purplerider1200
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 42
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 4/27/2016 5:14:20 PM
Well, think of it this way-

Women who are also low income struggle with car, rent, (or home owner bills) utilities. When something breaks they have no idea where the money will come from.

Low income men know how to make things work. If it's broke, we fix it. We can make a "well dressed" statement with a ten year old suit. If we travel, it's by car or truck, and normally within the lower forty-eight. An evening out may be just at a local bar. A fancy expensive restaurant, fills you up, but so does fast food. A ten buck Timex keeps time just as well as a thousand dollar Rolex. We manage with what's there.

Plenty of women have listened to the "Know it all" boyfriend who claims to be able to do for her. And she ends up with a screwed up mess that looks horrible, breaks, or never gets fixed. They have been lied to about a guys income. Or his abilities. The end result is they have been sold a bill of goods. And saying to their friends that their boyfriend is a trash collector is pretty low on the "envious" scale.

Their end of struggling to make ends meet is far different than ours. They just assume that their struggles are the same as ours. Which it isn't. All we have to do is convince them of our abilities. Which is a tall order.
 LetitiaLeGrande
Joined: 3/22/2015
Msg: 43
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 4/27/2016 5:53:42 PM
chitodog
women who put up with bad abusive behaviour have self esteem issues and will stay with a guy out of fear or not wanting to be alone. If they have children together, even more so. A woman with a healthy respect for herself would want only a respectful, responsible man no matter his income.
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 44
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 4/28/2016 7:00:16 AM
This is similar to whether a man would date an physically attractive woman that is an airhead or a b!tch vs dating a nice woman that is obese. The nice woman could be a good friend. The other woman could be an occasional booty call. LOL.
 GlacialEyez
Joined: 8/25/2015
Msg: 45
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/7/2016 6:55:37 AM
Just be yourself. If your a jerk than be a jerk but you will pay for it, if your a nice guy be a nice guy and you will be rewarded. Remember in the end we all reap that which we sow. We ALL will be judged according to our works. Good day all. BE NICE :)
 LAgoodguy
Joined: 8/21/2008
Msg: 46
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/7/2016 6:34:17 PM
I didn't read all the posts but what the OP implys that all the rich and well to do guys are abusive and just plain A$$es.
while all poor guys are the nice sweet guys. There are lots of nice good men who are also doing well. More then plenty of poor guys who beat and abuse the women they are with.
So why not look for a smart good guy who is doing well and still treat you well. Oh wait most of those guys are taken by the women who are also smart and doing well.
 LAEPF
Joined: 3/18/2016
Msg: 47
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/8/2016 7:25:26 PM
I almost can't believe this is a question but I'm bored so I'll answer... Ambition, enthusiasm and goals in a poor man far outweigh some abusive rich guy. Women in abusive relationships did not get into them because the guy was rich and they don't stay with the ***hole just because they want a sugar daddy. They are victims of abuse and were most likely love bombed and groomed by their abuser in the beginning. Money has zero to do with why women get into or stay in abusive relationships. From a practical standpoint, it can become an issue when they are trying to get out. But to think a woman's only motivation for allowing herself to be abused is so that she can drive a nice car and get pedicures every week is ridiculous.
 LiliMarleen
Joined: 5/24/2009
Msg: 48
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Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/9/2016 3:57:24 AM

So why not look for a smart good guy who is doing well and still treat you well. Oh wait most of those guys are taken by the women who are also smart and doing well.


Indeed. They're the needles in the haystack. Sometimes, one becomes available and then he has to be snatched up quickly before he's taken again. I'm only somewhat joking.

That's why this whole hard and fast rule of NEVER EVER dating somebody who hasn't been divorced for at least 5 years or some such thing really shouldn't be taken too seriously. If you meet one of these rare specimen, you should definitely give him a shot before you decide that he's too new on the market. (Hint: If he's still living in his soon to be ex-wife's basement, he's probably too new, but if he's been separated for a while and the ink is dry on his divorce decree, he might be ready).
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 49
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/11/2016 1:39:11 PM

a smart good guy who is doing well and still treat you well.


I resemble that remark.
 mdbco32
Joined: 3/30/2016
Msg: 50
Sweet guy, low income OR abusive guy, high income
Posted: 5/11/2016 4:44:14 PM

That's why this whole hard and fast rule of NEVER EVER dating somebody who hasn't been divorced for at least 5 years or some such thing really shouldn't be taken too seriously.


If this is true and most women believe in the five year rule, I need to wait until 2019 to consider making myself available. Being unavailable for a year after has resulted in a Bachelor's Degree, an officer position at my American Legion Post, total financial stability, and many other things; however, I should take myself completely off the market given this ideology. It isn't a bad idea either as I can spend money otherwise used for dating on further educational needs, a home, and other goals I will reach.
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