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 loverOF none
Joined: 6/14/2006
Msg: 5
Gold digger and 4,151 emailsPage 4 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
If you can find someone that floats your boat in each and everyway... money is a bonus, but not necessary as long as you have the basics.... I met one.. he cleaned me out.. OMFG.. yepers' and a few other things.

Do not become down hearted I did for a year.. and then I realized that I was a better person for having this experience, for how could I have known what it would have felt like for the opposite sex if I would have been that way. I now have added beauty within' but still want to spoil and be spoiled....yes passions...

I wish you all well in your quest for "THE ONE".

TC
 late4hula
Joined: 6/23/2006
Msg: 6
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 6/27/2006 8:41:06 AM
Hello seekone, I sympathize with you. Anyone can be deceived. I have worked with hundreds of men and women who have broken hearts and empty pockets. It pays to be cautious. I’m available for a free consultation, so if you are in a relationship and have that feeling in your gut that things aren’t right. Call or email me first. Check out my website: www.PrivateEyeHelp.com
 Yellavonjella
Joined: 1/26/2006
Msg: 16
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 7/10/2006 11:46:20 AM
ih90716 is just plain stupid.... her manor in which she writes speaks for itself.... ghetto whore. I got taken for 35k, but I have it written on promissory notes. It still doesnt mean anything, because I cant find the ****. And no I'm not racist, she was black. Plain and simple.... don't lend or give money to anyone but close, close family.
 ladykat
Joined: 11/1/2006
Msg: 20
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Posted: 1/4/2007 12:51:13 PM
I am so glad I fit into the other 20% of women. It does not impress me that I would be considered right off the bat as one of the 80% of "those" women. I have never judged one man by the last one. Aren't we all individuals but what chance do us nice girls who are independant have when guys thhink like that. I might as well get off here and be single with my own money, power, and influence and I don't live in Montana but am from close to there. One of the happiest times in my life was when my husband and I had nothing and we found we were happy with what we had at the time. Where and how did you come up with the figure of 80%?
 Superfighter
Joined: 8/26/2006
Msg: 21
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 1/4/2007 1:31:50 PM
She was a look but don't touch woman. We never slept in the same bed, never held hands, nothing. But her personality kept me in the circle so to speak.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

You seem like a nice person. I just have to point out by your own words that you knew she was not interested in you in an intimate way.

You liked her personality so you stayed with her hoping for more. You obviously had a good time with her so it probably was money well spent because you were essentially paying for her company as a friend. Therefore you are not a victim.

since we cannot read the emails that you sent to each other then we cannot know what caused her to reply that way towards you.


Take yourself out of the victim role and feel positive that you will find the right person for you.

If you posted this looking for pity or insults toward your friend then you are not benefitting yourself in any way. You should look at this as a great time that you had and now you are looking for someone who wants to be more than just a friend.

if you feel positive then you will receive positive. if you feel negative then you will receive more negative.

the universe cannot tell the difference between what you want and what you dont want.

it brings about what you think about most.

for example...if you think about bills all the time then you will receive more and more bills. if you think about positive income you will find that the universe will start sending you ways to increase your income. it works the same way with relationships or anything else.


So feel positive. keep in mind what you want in your life and let go of the negative. if you do this then you will see more of the results you want in your life.
 fancynanci
Joined: 8/21/2007
Msg: 36
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Posted: 11/27/2007 4:14:24 PM
A man should be able to tell if a woman is a gold digger on the first or second date.
 sweeeeeet
Joined: 3/25/2008
Msg: 41
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Posted: 6/15/2008 10:46:44 PM
Funny, the last time I checked , men can be true g-diggers as well, in this 2 paycheck world...I have run across my share of men hoping for a woman to " be his other half". increase his level of success , be his muse with benefits...runs both ways, does it not?
 kjamesb
Joined: 3/24/2007
Msg: 42
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 6/16/2008 8:38:34 AM

Funny, the last time I checked , men can be true g-diggers as well, in this 2 paycheck world...I have run across my share of men hoping for a woman to " be his other half". increase his level of success , be his muse with benefits...runs both ways, does it not?


There is a HUGE diffenrence between wanting an equal partner and being a gold digger. In today's economy, if a lady is looking for a man to support her, she's a gold digger. Period. If she's willing in controbuting to the partnership, then she's not. It's really that simple.

Now contributing to the partnership doesn't have to mean money. For example: if there is a marriage and one (EITHER the man or women) wants to be a home maker and the other agrees that that is a reasonable contribution to the partnership, then that's fine.
 matchlessm
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 43
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:14:31 PM
ang65,
There's another more fitting word for women (or men) who do what you're describing.
 matchlessm
Joined: 11/11/2007
Msg: 44
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 6/16/2008 10:27:03 PM
sweeeeeet,

I have no idea why hoping for the things you list makes someone a "true golddigger." I always thought people in love each wanted the best for the other and wanted to contribute to each other's success.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 49
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Posted: 2/15/2009 5:45:35 PM
I don't know what book the author of post 65 got his information from, but it doesn't speak well for our literary standards. He seems to believe a concocted, ludicrous stereotype of family life before the rise of modern (i.e. de Beauvoir, Friedan, Greer et al.) feminism. It's a form of propaganda much beloved by Hollywood screenwriters, churned out for the gullible to swallow whole. I think they do this to glorify, by contrast, the freedom of family life today, now that we've escaped from the crippling restraints of those benighted arrangements.

My mother and her mother both worked before they got married, and most of their fellow employees were women. My mother used to be amazed at the talk of sexual harassment at work, because she'd never seen it herself or heard of it from her working girlfriends.
My parents danced and kissed and went to parties and drank Cokes, but they didn't have sex within their first 10 hours together. Nor even within their first ten days, or weeks, or months together--but after they were married. But they were married--happily--for sixty years, until my father died.

My father had his own business, and dinner was almost always ready for him. He never raised a finger to my mother--nor would she have stayed with anyone who did, even once. Oddly enough, they actually informed themselves about the world, went to art museums, and discussed all sorts of interesting things. They even cared about raising my sister and me--it never would have crossed their minds to rely on the schools for that. Oh--and they had a TV all through the 1950's. So did our neighbors, and I always looked forward to the night the fights were on, when I got to go next door to watch them with my Dad and his buddy. Neither of the wives ever joined us--just imagine!
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 53
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Posted: 2/17/2009 12:44:58 AM
I'd be exaggerating if I said I have no idea what you're on about--but not much. I started my post by referring to post #65. I'm surprised to see your reaction.

If you'd read it carefully, you'd see the poster was pooh-poohing women who say they're "old-fashioned," and therefore expect the man to pay if they go out. He says women who say this are telling men they're "hookers," because they're saying that just by virtue of being female, they're entitled to a man's money. And if a man meets one of these women, he should get away fast.

To show how nonsensical this pining for the "old-fashioned" days is, he tried to show how loathsome the 1950's and 1960's were. I took exception to that, because I think trying to persuade with hyperbole is a cheap trick. It's usually a tipoff that you don't have the facts to make your case. Here are some of post #65's over-the-top assertions:


They [i.e. the women] usually say ['old' means] 1950's or 1960's. You reply, 'OH, ok, back when domestic violence was acceptable, child abuse was readily accepted, women were not allowed to work in any office jobs, and if they worked at all were the lowest paid and got the worst jobs in the company. Is that what you're pining for?' If they are, say you'll go along with that, but she is to quit her job TOMORROW, vow to stay home all day (remember, no TV and no cellphone, it's the 50s!) and clean. If dinner's not on the table and she's not dressed and in full makeup, she gets a punch in the mouth, 50s style.


I commented on several of these assertions. I was disputing them by proving that in at least one instance I knew of--my own family--they were false. That's why I recounted how--even well before the 1950's--my mother worked in an office with a number of other women. It's also why I pointed out that both my parents and their neighbors had TV's throughout the 1950's, and that although my mother usually had dinner ready for my father, he'd never have imagined punching her if she hadn't. (Or for ANY reason)



Women decide within the first few minutes whether they will ever sleep with you, and it will happen within the first 5 to 10 hours of contact time or will likely never happen at all (no matter HOW much you pay her!).


I recounted what my parents did before they married to prove that the poster's assertion was just plain false in at least one case I knew of. Of course I know sexual mores have changed drastically since that time. But he made a flat statement. If he wanted to guard against rebuttals like mine, he should have made clear that, although men should apply the "10 hours' contact" rule to dating today, several decades ago no one would have thought of applying it. And yet some people, at least, got excellent results without any such rule. If it's so great, how can that be?

What I wrote about my mother not encountering or hearing of any sexual harassment is true. But it was really just an aside. I'm not sure why you'd think I was obtuse, or that I wasn't aware it's a consideration in the workplace. I already knew something about that area of law, and I've heard more than one legal presentation on the subject.

I think you completely misunderstood the purpose of what I wrote. It irks me to see that brainless, fabricated caricature of the '50's repeated ad nauseam, in everything from TV ads to movies to posts on here. I think it's a subtly mocking portrayal of that period as the bad old days when middle-class Americans were naive, dopey, and irritatingly conventional and optimistic. And totally insensitive to the environment! I suspect the purpose is to make present-day American family life look better in comparison than it would if viewed by itself.

TV, movies, ads, etc. are likely to show families as progressive, enlightened, and egalitarian. And the roles have changed. No more father knows best--there often seems to be a clueless Dad who couldn't find his fanny with both hands, a Mom who continually has a wisecrack ready at his expense, and kids who are the only ones who really know what's going on. Forget, of course, the 35% national illegitimacy rate and its contribution to poverty, violent crime, drug use, poor education, etc. Forget also the high divorce rate and its tendency to have negative effects on children. At least we're not back in those impossibly lame, mind-numbingly bourgeois "Father Knows Best" days, when everyone ate macaroni and meat loaf!

I doubt I'll be reading de Beauvoir in the original French anytime soon, so I'll take your word for it. Where did I claim, or even imply, that she (or either of the others I named) was a "man hating feminist?" I was only trying to distinguish between the first American feminist movement and the one that began c. 1960. If I'd known more about the subject, off the top of my head, I would have left her name out. I don't know enough about her work to have any particular feelings about it, one way or the other.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 56
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Posted: 2/18/2009 3:17:43 AM
Ace,
I hope you don't think kids aren't still being beaten. My information is that rates of physical abuse of spouses and children, as well as sexual abuse of children, are higher than ever today. During the past couple centuries, many thousands of English and Americans--including some of the best--were at times hit on the legs with a switch, rod, cane, belt, etc. as punishment in school or at home. There is a world of difference between this sort of occasional physical discipline, which may have done more good overall than harm, and continual, irrational beatings by family members, which are always harmful, never justified, and sometimes criminal.

You're right that an exception to a rule doesn't disprove it. But it raises doubts about a rule to show that it's not true in at least one instance. (I'm thinking like a lawyer here.) I also wanted to suggest that the rule may not be as great as he was claiming. He made the flat statement that it works, and I was showing that if a long-term relationship were the goal, delaying intercourse until marriage seemed to work even better. I suppose he'd counter that it was unrealistic to do that today--but I don't see any reason to think it was any easier for couples in the 1930's. They had libidos just like we do.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 57
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Posted: 2/18/2009 3:26:33 AM
Sock,
You nailed it. I agree with all your points. I look at paying for dates and chivalry just the same way--especially at first, and especially when I invited her. Later on, I've found it's a great feeling when the lady sometimes insists on buying the drinks, or whatever. Makes me feel appreciated.
 OldFolkie
Joined: 6/8/2008
Msg: 71
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Posted: 2/20/2009 8:19:02 PM
I've never met one either. This may have something to do with the fact that I often go to the Church Mice for emergency loans to get through the month. On the other hand, the good news is that I am long on respect. So I can't afford a night out at The Cheesecake Factory (or rarely), but a picnic in the park with a bucket of KFC is kind of fun, and all that I expect, or accept, is the beginning of affectionate friendship. That's my conception of the foundation for anything more...and I don't think it's unrealistic or unobtainable.

If you do actually do the exploding head thing, Sterling, could you post the video on YouTube? You'll be (posthumously) famous!!
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 81
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Posted: 2/22/2009 9:09:33 AM
actually met a man gold digger the other day. what makes him or her (the one you speak about) a gold digger? i'd say a narcissistic personality and a good dose of reinforcement from the arm candy crowd... and, of course, the man i met touted to be a famous "artist". he knew the market well enough, to put some "bonding" ingredient into his formula...a lot of charisma and creativity. sorry fella, not sold on e-bay this round. i neither dig, nor expect to be dug.

i am taking a week or two off from this dating scene. it's getting weary. OP, emailing for thousands of times, is not what i'd call an intimate relationship or a friendship. next time, if i were you, i'd go on a singles cruise. not clear what "circle" you say this woman kept you in, the rich and famous? or the rich, famous and lonely? had a number of those on my board of directors back east. money just doesn't appear to solve that problem either.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 85
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Posted: 2/24/2009 11:37:40 PM

the real whore who says "pay me this much to get this much" is much more ethical, honest than the second types of whore who are like 80% of women.


My, my. 80%, is it? Being a little hard on the ladies, aren't you? I think I've met some of the worst (only briefly, thank God) but unlike you, I'm certain they're a small minority.

I can't imagine wanting to be with a woman who values you mostly for your money, but some men do. Maybe it lets them feel needed when nothing else will. And women like that must have some emotional want that's satisfied when men buy them things.

It's much more fun to have a normal lady who likes you, thinks of you, and can't keep her hands off you--especially if you feel the same about her. There are lots of very nice unattached ladies around, but I have a hunch they avoid guys who think the odds are 4 to 1 any given one of them's a dishonest whore.
 Ender330
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 86
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Posted: 2/25/2009 12:58:36 AM
HELP HERE!!!

OK sorry everyone! I am not from Cali...I am an OHIO boy! Now keep in mind that I have not met anyone on this site who has been interested in me because of money.

But offline is another story. I am for from broke but just because I have it...women expect for me to give it up to them. And when I say NO...it's always the same thing...I don't care about them or I am stingy and they get mad and ever want to speak with me again.

One month I had enough so called female friends ask me for enough money combined to wipe out my whole pay check for the month! That's when I put and end to helping them out...now keep in mind that I had never had sex with any of these women, at one point I may have dated them but figured it was time to move on.

When does it become ok to ask for money? I started telling them that they need to go find a man and I'm not interested in helping anyone that I am not planning to make my lady. I told another that she would be offended if I asker her for sex and I am offended because you asked me for money...I'm not the guy you should be asking for money...you should go see the person you have been active with(but not in those words)
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 87
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Posted: 2/25/2009 1:57:21 AM
Is there something in the water back there that makes these women so greedy for other people's money? Please tell me you're kidding about giving them a month's pay. You do realize you can get your man card suspended for that, don't you? Your "friends" sound like they could stand to consult Miss Manners. I'd take it as an answer to my prayers if they got mad and never wanted to speak with me again.
 Ender330
Joined: 4/23/2006
Msg: 88
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Posted: 2/25/2009 6:47:11 AM
Nooooo wayyyy....none of them got a dime from me. I had had enough at that point
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 95
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 2/25/2009 9:03:47 AM

And I don't think a shovel would do much good in this case.

A lobotomy perhaps?

 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 100
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 2/25/2009 1:52:48 PM
Sex for a cup of coffee? Good luck with that. How's it working out for you?

Actually NM, he was quoting from my profile. After reading all of the threads about gold digging, what to do on a 1st meet, how soon to have sex, debates on who pays for coffee, guys who expect a woman to put out after taking them out, and the fact that I'm not currently looking to date on here... this is my tongue in cheek answer to all of this.


I know someone who has a PhD, is handsome but very poor.

I work with several Ph.D.'s and they are far from poor. It must be the discipline.
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 102
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 2/25/2009 2:20:48 PM

how much money you make? what is your net worth? what car do you drive etc

In my opinion, asking such questions are in incredibly poor taste. All I care about is someone who can take care of himself like a big boy and is responsible like I am. An equal if you will.
 Miss W
Joined: 12/4/2006
Msg: 104
Gold digger and 4,151 emails
Posted: 2/25/2009 4:54:00 PM

the good ones get caught fast

Not necessarily. Some people don't know a good one if they slap them upside the head or until they are long gone. Or they are dazzled like the long gone OP and can't see the error of their ways until after they and their resources (emotional and financial) have been depleted.
 matchlight
Joined: 1/31/2009
Msg: 108
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the second types of whore who are like 80% of women
Posted: 2/25/2009 10:39:30 PM
What, exactly, IS your culture? Apparently it approves of running down American culture. And if you do that, you might want to do it sotto voce. Some of us stupid Americans don't like to hear our country insulted.
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