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 4SUSAN
Joined: 12/26/2007
Msg: 412
Men over 55!Page 7 of 23    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23)
Bravo to you, Lnstarkiss!
I think you spoke for most of the women on this site.
I would just add: Men who reject a 55 year old woman because she doesn't look 25.
 Dave of Indiana
Joined: 3/18/2009
Msg: 413
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Men over 55!
Posted: 10/30/2010 6:46:30 PM

Please don't lump all women together collectively when remarking about M-F dynamics.

I agree, however, may I take the liberty to change one word:

Please don't lump all men together collectively when remarking about M-F dynamics.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 414
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Men over 55!
Posted: 10/31/2010 3:04:17 PM
You know? Reading some of the responses to the original post makes me want to barf! Like it was the original thought of the poster so you can all have at it. Give me a break. A little too defensive means what? The thought was thrown out there for people's comments and I see slanderous posts throughout? Sad is the day when we cannot as adults, post what we hear, think, feel and be riduculed for it...no wonder no one posts anymore...
 Dave of Indiana
Joined: 3/18/2009
Msg: 415
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Men over 55!
Posted: 10/31/2010 6:10:55 PM

I have now seen a few posts from you folks who say that men over 55 are more or less into fantasy and not the dating scene! If this is true, then I only have a few years left as a datable commodity! lol....Is this really true???


I'm 59 and have had real dates in the last year. In the last two months I've been seeing a woman (my age) on a weekly basis.
 rearguard*2
Joined: 2/8/2008
Msg: 416
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/2/2010 11:23:22 AM
Was that "weekly basis" or "weakly basis" ???
 mateo45
Joined: 1/17/2008
Msg: 417
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/8/2010 11:53:27 AM
...um, "hardly"...!!
 moonwing
Joined: 6/30/2010
Msg: 418
Men over 55!
Posted: 9/14/2011 7:53:43 AM
most of my older lady friends really appreciate having a man over 60 who still has a lusty side. after all we aren't dead yet lol. i think it may be more in the delivery or the timing that puts women off . a man who starts talking sex before asking about anything else is just making himself seem like a bimbo?and is a real turn off. at least pretend to be intelligent and sensitive for the first date lmao. if you are meeting these men and are around his age then he is not in a fantasy world as he IS meeting you , so don't get your grsasnny knickers in a knot!
 Teddybear1950
Joined: 1/24/2006
Msg: 423
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Men over 55!
Posted: 9/18/2011 11:04:31 AM
You women want that slim and trim man in your life. You will not help a decent man who is overweight to get back to being slim and trim. You pass him by and think that he is not worth your time or effort.
You will tell him "Find a support group" and when he asks if you know of one he gets "Don't be silly."
You women will end up with this type of relationship not one full of and . Someone who devotes himself to one woman when dating.

I wish each and every single lady that is looking to find that special someone success.
 oaklandish
Joined: 6/29/2008
Msg: 426
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Men over 55!
Posted: 9/18/2011 11:47:33 AM
from crystal hill-"One of my favorite jokes...... Men are like parking spaces, the good ones are taken and the ones left over are handicapped. Of course you can substitute women for men. LOL" s"

Wow- really ? I hope you never have a handicapping condition as you age. As the mother of a woman in a wheelchair I take offense at what you said. It is amazing to me that having a disabling condition is still fair game for being the butt of jokes on here.
 ladyc4
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 428
Men over 55!
Posted: 9/18/2011 4:24:31 PM

You will not help a decent man who is overweight to get back to being slim and trim.


Teddybear-meaning you absolutely no personal disrespect!-but when I read the above-quoted sentence in your post, the thought that came GALLOPING across my mind was "The Lord helps them that help themselves".
Don't misunderstand me-I've had some nasty lbs sneak up and jump on me due to an illness/medication situation, and now I'm working on getting rid of them-but I'm certainly NOT expecting any guy to help me. Whether or not I am a "decent" woman -well, let's just say there is more than one school of thought on that subject....

It's a tough market for BOTH genders,these days. If there are corrections and improvements that need to be made to your body, your mind, your health, your financial stability,what needs to be done is to find the appropriate QUALIFIED advisors for whatever the issue is, do not think that dating and relationships are going to "fix" an issue in your life.
Of course everyone has some issue or other that can't be completely corrected or fixed,or is a continual work-in-progress,that doesn't mean they are automatically undateable. But trying to work an angle of " I have this problem and I need a girlfriend (or boyfriend) to help me solve it,isn't likely to work real well, not in the times we know now.
If you need help to get back to being slim and trim, talk to your doctor. Find a dietitian or a personal trainer. Join a gym-you can join some major weightloss support groups online even.
If you find yourself continually being rejected by the ladies because you are significantly overweight, how is that OUR fault? We didn't make you gain weight, why is it on one of us to date you to help you get back to being slim and trim?
Hell, if a woman posted to a thread, that her house was falling down around her ears and bill collectors were camped on her front porch,and she was mad because no man was willing to help a "decent woman" get these things under control-she'd be laughed out of the thread.
Dating is not supposed to be a remedial service rendered to a person of the opposite gender, regardless of how "decent" (s)he is.
Cindy O
 MoustacheMatt
Joined: 9/6/2011
Msg: 429
Men over 55!
Posted: 9/19/2011 8:03:19 AM
Seriously, an excellent comment. F-em if they cannot take a joke.... Life is indeed to short. GLTA Matt Semper Fi
 StevieC55
Joined: 12/30/2010
Msg: 430
Men over 55!
Posted: 11/27/2012 6:15:38 PM
Well you don't have to be half naked and want to sleep with someone you just met, but it couldn't hurt...

I'm just saying
 1388SmartBlonde
Joined: 5/15/2011
Msg: 431
Men over 55!
Posted: 11/27/2012 7:08:34 PM
Did you really want to resurrect a 6 year old post?
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 432
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/27/2012 7:37:50 PM
Yes, blonde, it is a six year old post, but reading your posts, and seeing the intelligence and common sense in them, you should understand that this post is as valid today as it was six years ago. Just my opinion...no offense meant.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 433
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/28/2012 4:00:23 AM
The OP seems to be very observant, she's almost got my number, because the ideal relationship for many of us can only be had in a fantasy.

I guess my admission is of little value without an explanation....so I'll give it a try. I divorced at 45, and am now 64. I dated and had several relationships the first ten years, and decided to quit altogether at 53. I did have one slip in the past 11 years, but it was brief and reminded me of why I quit to begin with.

I had no intent of getting married again, and I let that be known to every woman I dated those first years, and they led me to believe they had the same agenda. Things always went just great for awhile until they brought up the future and where we were going....and it never failed to come up. I don't like hurting people, and it always seemed to come to that. My neighbors wife said I was plagued with being great husband material ....not exactly what I wanted to hear....although I can't consider it an insult. It does however place me in a undesirable position for my wants or needs, I'm either going to hurt someone, get married or eliminate dating and remain totally alone....I had little choice but to choose the latter, but all three choices leave much to be desired. The FWB thing doesn't really do it for me either, I prefer to feel more than just friendly when I sleep with someone, but that doesn't mean I want marriage. What do you do when one doesn't come without the other?

Husband material LOL.....that really sucks for a man that's adjusted to living alone and likes it.
 larissan04
Joined: 8/11/2011
Msg: 434
Men over 55!
Posted: 11/28/2012 9:30:47 PM
I think that this is true of men in general, but I think you need to be a bit more specific as to what you mean by "fantasy." Are you talking about the older man wanting to date a 22 year old, or are you talking about sexual fantasy as opposed to a real relationship?
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 435
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/28/2012 11:26:43 PM
^^^^No!....fantasies about younger woman never come to mind at all. The fantasy is someone that doesn't require any more from me than I require of them....and can leave it that way! I'm satisfied with a LTR without marriage as a future goal, but I haven't found any women that are. I always get backed into a corner with the same old thing...."where do we go from here?...I want to be married." Then the accusations start flying..."Oh...so we are just FWBs huh?"...."I want more than that, what kind of a woman do you think I am?"......"can't commit huh?"

It's like a broken record.......so just shoot me please! LOL
 Wonder5750
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 436
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 10:24:19 AM
^^^ this is an interesting post to me. Why is it so hard to either accept what is given, or move on? At this age is it really necessary to remarry? Its not like you are going to be starting a family, and it seems it would a lot less complicated if you didn't marry. I like living alone, I have a decent life, I just wanted someone to share with. Doesn't seem like too much to ask at all.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 437
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 10:34:59 AM
This is an interesting post. I want a long term relationship,....FWB i not for me...and neither is marriage (again). But I must be in the "minority" of women? I don't need to "stake my claim" to a man through marriage....people are people, not pieces of property.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 438
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 2:29:33 PM
^^^^I think as women get more deeply involved with someone, the dynamics change sort of like someone trying out a recreational drug vs. becoming addicted and needing a guaranteed supply....I'm not sure. I don't think they come into a relationship with deception in mind. Maybe it's where I live in the bible belt and the outside influences that start working on them from friends and family...again I'm not sure. I know they discuss their relationship, and I'm sure some family members or friends will start planting the seeds of tradition by asking questions like "do you think he would marry you?"......then she begins to wonder herself, and the testing begins.

I try not to complain too much about human nature, but I must admit...it has a funny way of robbing us of much happiness with these "all or nothing" ideals we seem to have. Maybe that's why I'm so intrigued with the "Mosuo" tribes in China....too bad our society didn't evolve that way....with all our modern conveniences, it could have been heaven on earth.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 6/17/2011
Msg: 439
Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 4:10:42 PM
So if marriage is unimportant...then why are you against it?

I was living with a man, another woman told me that in her eyes that means he is still single...that marriage was the only relationship status she respects and if it is a man she wants ...even for a fling...she will pursue him. I am not agreeing about the mindset and at the time she thought we were married so I never told her differently...but I have no issue with either and if I was with someone and they wanted marriage I wouldn't not do marriage and yet I think id be fine unmarried as well....

Just wonder why you would be so against it.... determine that in your own head and you will get the reason they want you to want to marry them.
 natgoat227
Joined: 6/10/2012
Msg: 440
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 6:38:25 PM
I'd like a 'younger' lady......
Not the ~Fantasy-type~....22-26 y.o. ....
Just younger than me.
As much as I could really get into someone 30 yrs younger...
.It's just too Highly Improbable that someone of that age bracket would have an attraction for someone 55+.
I'm more in the market for someone between 38 and 55.....
with the chemistry and drive to make an equal effort with me.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 441
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/29/2012 10:13:08 PM
^^^^As young as 38?....that's young enough to be your daughter. How could you relate to someone that much younger?....not to mention those "robbed the cradle" looks people like me would give you. LOL



Giggles....you ask why am I so against marriage? lots of reasons...where do I start.
1. I like my cooking better.
2. I like my house cleaning better...I don't ram the vacum cleaner into a 2000.00 speaker cabinet or leave scuff marks all over the baseboard molding.
3. I can hand wash a two dishes, without thirty gallons of water and 30 minutes of noise from a dishwasher.
4. My keys are where I put them....and I always remember where that is.
5. My fridge is in order with the most used items in the front....and out of date items hit the trash quick.
6. I can lean or touch against my bathroom sink without getting powder or make up all over my pants.
7. I can actually use my phone without waiting for an hour.
8. It takes more effort to complain about a toilet seat position, than it does to change it.
9. I don't want your three dogs and two cats in my house.
10. I don't want your family bugging me to fix their broken sh*t in my work shop.
11. I don't want your brother and his wife dropping in un-announced from Oklahoma.
12. I don't want to be a short term loan company for your kids.
13. I don't want your ex-husband calling here about some lie he claims you told your kids about him.
14. I like my freedom without owing anyone an explanation of where I'm going, or when I'll return.
15. I like earning my money and spending it as I see fit.
16. I'm not interested in your religion or care to debate it with you.
17. I love my closet space without the fifty dresses you haven't been able to fit into since high school.
18. I'm 100% debt free, including mortgage and have only managed that by being single.
19. The TV channel stays where I put it.
20. I like my decorating with mild earth tones....I need sunglasses when you girls go after something with a paint roller.

These are just a few reasons why you should stay at your house and I should stay at mine....no need to cover the obvious biggies like you just got promoted and need to move to L.A. or I just had a stoke and forgot who you are. LOL

Does this sound like I've got this determined in my own head Giggles....or do I still seem cloudy on the issue? LOL
 timeforall
Joined: 8/26/2012
Msg: 442
Men over 55!
Posted: 11/30/2012 7:12:00 AM
I agree lion. No need to get married at our ages again ....ever. The great majority of women are not worth it. But there is always a small chance, albeit a very small one, that you will meet a woman and fall madly in love. Then your tune would likely change.
 Secondhand_Lion
Joined: 11/10/2008
Msg: 443
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Men over 55!
Posted: 11/30/2012 11:48:25 AM
^^^^Actually, I don't think there is anything wrong with women that our Christian based society didn't cause...or the men for that matter. We are just very different in every way, and nature laid out or DNA....but religions with their infinte ignorance dictated how we ought to live. Love is also a conditional thing that in most cases has a variable shelf life...beyond that, we are usually kidding ourselves.

In the beginning we lived as tribes of hunters and gatherers and knew nothing of biology or science. We had no idea of how a woman got pregnant or by who....we just knew what caused it and everybody did it. There was no pairing off to separate caves for an isolated life of one man, woman and child together. Nobody knew who's child was who's, and didn't care, because they were raised and loved by the whole community. Men hunted and shared the heavy work together, and for the most part, hung out together except for slipping off to mate.....and usually with a different woman each time. There was no jealousy, because there was no ownership or need for it.

With women, it was pretty much the same, they picked fruits and berries together, taylored animal skins for the men and themselves and kept the village fires going. They hung out together with the children and made jokes about how small Musat's willy was.

Nothings changed today.....just watch what happens at a party or social gathering... the men go one way, and the women go the other, and we have fun with our same sex comrads. If you think about it....that's the major driving force behind a social gathering.....bringing a tribe together, yet separating the sexes. If we did that daily...the divorce rate would go to zero. Men and women have little to nothing in common, and that's the way it was meant to be for obvious reasons. I enjoy and can endure a mans company far better than a womans outside of romance and sex....that's why we go hunting and fishing together. Put a bunch of women and kids together, and all you hear is laughter and fun. 10,000 years ago, that's the way we lived and our DNA is still hardwired the same.

There is nothing wrong with women or men....we just live a life in conflict with natures plan. Somehow in the past, we allowed merchant bullies to become rulers and invent Gods to control us like sheep. People were never meant to wind up alone because a spouse left or died...or their children grew up. It's a cruel joke placed on us by the ruling class behind your religions.

Take that rare white headed couple that everybody seems to envy for surviving a life long marriage, and get them off to the side for an honest talk.....if they are honest, they will tell you it was pure hell and heart break much of the time, but they honored their marriage vows for the sake of family and fear of being alone. Kudos to them, but I just don't think life was meant to be that much of a struggle.

I salute China's "Mosuo tribe"....the last remaining intelligent people on earth!.....I didn't say intellectual. LOL
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