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 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 133
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What makes guys jealous?Page 8 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)
To try to hold onto a person, is trying to possess them... the moment one does that is the beginning of the end. A bond or connection comes the other way... it is the other person giving and you accepting, not trying to make it exist.

It strikes me that when you are jealous or possessive you are possibly not really secure about the bond or connection you have with the other person - but more than likely it is you are not very secure about who you are as a person and that life will work out for you. In previous relationships I have answered jealousy by trying to make them feel more secure. It hasn't worked, although theoretically it ought to if it is only a matter of not being secure about your connection.

If you believe that who you are is enough - and we are all enough - then perhaps you have no reason to be jealous.
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 134
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 12/22/2007 11:51:08 AM
I almost NEVER get jealous. I don't think of myself as particularly secure either, so while I agree that jealousy is a sign of insecurity (I think it's a sign of a few things.. none of them good.), I can't really say that someone who doesn't get jealous is automatically secure either.

Wow.. that sounded circular even to me and I thought it.. oh well.

For me to get jealous, it takes a lot. I'm 37 and have yet to experience an serious jealousy. The closest I've come is being jealous of a friend's smoking hot new outfit or shoes or something. I suspect that's more envious.. than jealous though.

When I'm dating someone... other girls flirting with him barely registers. If he spends a lot of time talking to his friends at a gathering.. so what? Don't I have other people to talk to? Don't me and him talk ALL the time as it is?
 audio123
Joined: 8/1/2007
Msg: 138
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 12/22/2007 7:11:28 PM
jealousy is a totaly natural feeling! everyone get's to feel it! what make's me jealous is when a girlfreind decides she wants to spend more time with a guy freind then myself or when she nonstop compliments guy's around me and i dont get complimented! reason for me being on this site lol. so there is some examples of why i have felt the devish feeling of jealousy!
 El_Mariachi
Joined: 4/21/2007
Msg: 140
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 12/22/2007 7:20:10 PM
^^

My guess is he trusted you. Weird huh?
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 143
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 1/6/2008 8:33:50 AM
Sad...my last boyfriend would have purched a Islamic dress for me if he had the control...
 quietcowboy
Joined: 12/25/2007
Msg: 145
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 1/6/2008 9:09:21 AM
When I've been jealous in the past it has generally been early or late in a relationship where I am not certain that she is as strongly committed to her as she is to me. I generally feel it, but I try not to react to the feeling. When a relationship hits a stable point where its pretty assured the we feel the same things for each other, jealousy isn't part of the picture.
 InfinityCSM
Joined: 12/9/2007
Msg: 147
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 1/6/2008 9:28:05 AM
If I am in a relationship I do not get jealous. I believe in free will, and see it as pointless to try to convince someone to stay with me if they don't want to. If she wants someone else; goodbye! Now the exception for me is if I am not in the relationship I can feel jealous, but that is probably because I feel insecure as the relationship has not yet been established. That being said I do not act on these feelings, as again, a girl as free will to choose whom she wants to be with.
 Ravenstar66
Joined: 8/27/2007
Msg: 150
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 1/6/2008 11:36:48 AM
I don't get jealous

and I have no time for men who are jealous.

we either trust each other or we don't belong together...that's it, that's all.
 _play with me
Joined: 4/1/2008
Msg: 152
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 6/23/2008 1:43:43 PM
You got to be the most down to earth guy out here..if everybody listen to him the world would be normal..beeing jealous is nuts... do you know how many fish there is in this sea..get over it guys she is probably ****ing your friend right now!!!
 Venari
Joined: 9/4/2007
Msg: 153
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 6/23/2008 2:50:49 PM

also......if men are really jealous that usually means they are doing things behind your back

Or maybe it just means, you're hot enough that he knows (or thinks) that you know you can have your pick of any man, and he might not be good enough, or not as good as who you're talking to/hanging out with.

Jealousy can be seen as self criticism. But then again, on the flip side, he could be controlling. It's case - by - case, there's no blanket policy on jealousy.
 Gourmetchef50
Joined: 11/24/2007
Msg: 154
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 6/23/2008 3:03:50 PM
i truly dont have a jealous bone in my body..women have even said to me..why don't you get upset at such & such?/Women are like bus stops..another one comes along shortly..if she thinks the grass is greener somewhere else...i tell her to go 4 it!!
 TxSippiGal
Joined: 9/30/2007
Msg: 155
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 6/23/2008 3:06:26 PM
I dated a guy a few months back who admittedly had a jealous streak. We were on our 3rd date.. and went to a movie as we were walking up to the back of the theater he got sorta bent out of shape because he noticed a man looking at me funny and making faces..rolling his eyes. He became a little agitated and mentioned it to me. I looked down and it was my housemate's grandson (she is considerably older than I).. he is a big kidder and we kid each other. He was there with his wife and noticed I came in with a man and he was trying to catch my eye.. and tease me.. except I never noticed him.. but man my date did.. and he was not too happy about it. But he cooled down after I explained to him who it was. I have laughed over that since then becuase it made it funnier because of the type of person this grandson is. Sure made me feel good when my date actually thought this guy was trying to make the move on me hahahaha... If my date only knew what I thought of him.. he'd know he'd never have cause to be jealous.. I thought he was "da man"!!!! I still do but we are no longer dating.
 Gourmetchef50
Joined: 11/24/2007
Msg: 173
What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/10/2008 5:49:33 AM
i truly dont get jealous..its a wasted emotion...in fact some women have commented that they 'wanted' me to get riled up...it made them feel 'wanted' or attention-grabbing'..but trust me..its not a positive quality in the long run.
 Frankycadillac
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 175
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/10/2008 5:13:49 PM
Jealous?
I have nothing to be jealous of.
I am jealous of you having me to be jealous of.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 180
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/10/2008 6:38:46 PM
Akimmbo, msg #163: "We all share basically the same emotions...and they are all valid. The learning part of it all is to shine light on the good emotions, and work hard at keeping negative emotions in check, as just a small voice."

Yeppers. For anyone to say they don't have a jealous bone in their body, I ponder how many of them have filed for divorce or broken up due to infidelity??? For, if you don't get jealous whatsoever, what would it matter if your wife/husband/GF/BF cheated on you??? There are even couples who 'swing' and set boundaries of how far they 'allow' their partners 'to go'.

Oh, a 'boundary' was crossed you say? Hmm, guess that means each has their own boundaries of what they will tolerate, then, correct? One can disguise and spin it however they'd like. Insecurity, lack of trust, etc. The proof is in the pudding.

As Akimmbo stated, it's only a matter of working at keeping those emotions and feelings in check....so long as it hasn't completely obliterated your boundary, you won't act upon those emotions. The degree to which your boundary (IMO) was crossed, determines the degree to which you will react to it.

One can rationalize it all they want...."there's plenty of fish in the sea"; "I won't get jealous, I'll just move on," etc. Well, you just exposed your jealousy! Otherwise, you'd be cool with it and not give it a second thought.




~ds~
 Frankycadillac
Joined: 5/1/2008
Msg: 181
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/10/2008 9:10:56 PM
nothing wrong with sour grapes.

eventually it turns into wine.
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 182
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/10/2008 9:20:03 PM
^^^ Had to have been an emotion there to sour the grapes!



~ds~
 Just 4 You
Joined: 1/25/2005
Msg: 186
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What makes guys jealous?
Posted: 7/11/2008 12:35:08 PM
Women get to use other Dating Sites for free... but Men have to pay $25 a month.
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