Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 justmeinnc05
Joined: 8/12/2005
Msg: 17
Returning gifts when the relationship endsPage 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

internet bashing is for losers. Enouigh said.


This is true, but her post made me so angry!!! She is the kind of woman that makes it hard for the rest of us. Men meet enough women like her that they become bitter and by the time they do meet a woman that really is loving and caring they are going to end up being just as cold as her!!!
 arri
Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 23
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:11:59 PM
lack of class transcends sex and religion

Did you ever thought about buying a gym membership for him to lose the weight?
 justmeinnc05
Joined: 8/12/2005
Msg: 24
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:14:09 PM

No, Men become bitter for entirely other reasons. As well, at her/my age, it's a hell of a lot harder to meet ppl as it is. Whether her post made you angry or not, it didn't give you the go ahead to bash her ;)

The chances of meeting a loving, caring girl at our age is next to impossible anyways. They are all jaded because of a bad sexual experience from the club anyways. Trust me, I've seen it.


Sorry but when you come on a public forum and post, you have given the green light to be bashed. I was being a lot nicer than what I was really thinking. Truly holding back.

As to the age thing, the woman is 28 years old. She is only two years away from being 30 and isn't a child. I am 49 so trust me, anything you have seen I have seen and a lot more. I have a daughter that age. She is married and very loving and caring with her husband and children.

Exactly at what age do you feel a person is responsible for their actions?
 stoneside
Joined: 9/3/2004
Msg: 27
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:22:03 PM
Bashed by people who are ugly inside? US????? We're the ugly ones?
K, don't even want to think about this thread anymore, put a fork in me, I'm done.

(and nobody cares if you're Jewish)
 Dehm
Joined: 5/4/2006
Msg: 30
view profile
History
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:44:10 PM
She's a professional model with one (lousy) pic on her profile?

She can't spell "high maintenance woman" (in her profile)

Has the audacity to offer to sell the poor schmuck something HE purchased in the first place...

This is not an intelligent woman who is going to attract decent men - and moreso, grasping at straws to avoid mediocrity -pitiful
 SEENREAD
Joined: 6/17/2006
Msg: 33
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:52:17 PM
Give him back the tix.
 BrownEyedLeo
Joined: 1/5/2006
Msg: 38
view profile
History
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 4:41:41 PM
Your question was what would I do. I would NOT look at a man one day and decide he was fat and just immediately not be attracted to him anymore. I would question myself as to when I became such a shallow ungrateful woman that I did not appreciate a man that would purchase expensive tickets for such an selfish person as me. Then I would call him as fast as I could and ask him where I could meet him to give his tickets back so he could take a nice, caring woman that would appreciate him.
BTW, I can see now why some men on POF think the women here are shallow, rude, and insensitive. You give new meaning to the word ruthless.
 ~iiCe~
Joined: 7/26/2005
Msg: 45
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 7:13:09 PM
this is great... not sure why you would want the tickets... but whatever.. bitter is as bitter does....
 YamIhere
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 46
view profile
History
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 7:15:09 PM
If he dumped her, I would say that she was within her rights to keep the tickets. Etiquette dictates in this situation would agree.

But since she dumped him, I don't see any claim she has to the tickets. Not only via the laws of etiquette, but also legally. Tickets are different from other forms of gifts in that the paper tickets themselves are not the gift. The gift is the event that those tickets gain access to. As she brok off the relationship prior to the gift actually being dispaensed and she has offer no compensation for the tickets, quite frankly, I don't think there's a small claims judge in the country that would side with the OP on this matter.
 Melodic Euphoria
Joined: 3/22/2005
Msg: 47
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 7:19:24 PM
I think you're the one being unreasonable. He brought the ticket for you with an objective in mind, and he did it only while you were his girlfriend. Keep in mind that those tickets cost him a fortune (which may make you want to keep them for yourself); so it seems like an obviously reasonble thing to do if you were to return those tickets to him like a considerate and decent lady that we all should try to be, especially considering that you were the one who broke with him, not vice versa.
 Melodic Euphoria
Joined: 3/22/2005
Msg: 54
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 8:58:29 PM
Oh by the way, for people who call you shallow and all that crap for dating a guy with money, or dumping someone for their appearances...those are noises, just ignore it. We all have our own reasons for dating, and we all have objectives - expectations of what we hopes to get out of the relationship with a man. It's alright to want to date men who can provide a certain kind of lifestyle for you. There's nothing wrong with pursuing what you want in a man, or plain what you want in general.

But thinking that you knows what you want doesn't necessarily equate with the reality of what you actually want, which we all have to find for ourselves. It certainly doesn't have to mean that we have to forfeit our basic obligations to live up to our standards of decency, respect, etc...as opposed to being "cheap" and without character, and I mean that in the nicest way possible. If you came here for opinions because you're in doubt, I can tell you this much - a lady with character would have returned the tickets regardless of who dumped who, and she'd never...(god, I can't repeat this without lol!)...sell them...uh...back.
 Melodic Euphoria
Joined: 3/22/2005
Msg: 57
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:49:44 AM
^^^ In terms of non-personal characteristics (i.e looks, money, talent, etc), we're always replaceable, and we can never win under those terms in a relationship in the long run.
 Sparklin
Joined: 9/1/2006
Msg: 89
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 9/13/2006 9:35:01 AM
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 7/18/2006 1:09:39 PM
I didn't come here to argue with people who are ugly on the inside.

I asked a simple question and I get the message; I will return the tickets.

Sigh. At least I didn't get any responses from Nazi wannabes bashing me for being Jewish this time.



I BELIEVE SHE ALREADY MADE THIS DECISION WAY BACK IN JULY! Why are we still responding to it??
 Huggablehottie
Joined: 8/3/2006
Msg: 93
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 9/15/2006 5:30:21 AM
Well looks fade, and one day you may also get fat! :)
However, since these tickets were expensive, you should give them
back to him, I think you are making excuses not to, because you do
want to see him at the concerts. Why?
If you don't care about him or want to see him any longer, you WOULD
want to give the tickets back.
To ask him to buy them back , is just plain greedy and low!
 bucsgirl
Joined: 5/13/2006
Msg: 95
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 9/16/2006 2:51:39 PM
I think, generally speaking that a gift is a gift. Period. I don't have a high amount of respect for people who give gifts with strings attached. I've had gifts from guys I've dated that I still have, some are rings, one's a lady's watch. Didn't feel the need to give them back when we broke up, nor have I ever asked for any of the gifts I gave to be given back.
This situation is a bit different, and if it were me, I'd certainly have given them back immediately and not had to be asked. And asking him to BUY them back?? That's just cheap and trashy...UGH!!
 dogar2007
Joined: 5/24/2006
Msg: 98
view profile
History
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 9/16/2006 8:39:18 PM
According to etiquette experts, the rule is this:

If a gift is given for your own use, because someone wants you to have it, you get to keep it forever.

If a set of "gifts" is given for shared use, it should be returned if the sharing has ended. I don't guess you would want to keep just your tickets, because then you would be sitting next to him and get repulsed by him all over again, right? (Just kidding!)
 tooltimetim
Joined: 9/17/2006
Msg: 106
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 9/24/2006 11:18:16 AM
thats what a viking does no biggie
 armyguy35
Joined: 10/5/2006
Msg: 112
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/12/2006 4:06:01 AM
I personally wouldnt expect them back( the cost of the tickets isnt whats important), but a decent person would offer to give them back.As far as the FAT so I dumped him CRAP... talk about shallow and UGLY on the inside.....thats what gives women a bad name and makes US not trust them
 armyguy35
Joined: 10/5/2006
Msg: 113
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/12/2006 4:11:04 AM
well shes OBVIOUSLY not a decent person......and probably is a skank herself
 Krystaldiamond
Joined: 10/13/2006
Msg: 117
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/29/2006 12:51:41 AM
Call me stupid but I gave back the diamond.
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 119
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/29/2006 8:18:59 AM
jess.......honestly i would give them back...you had ended the relationship with him, you don't need to make each other feel awkward at the event and sitting beside him would do just that, even more if he purchased a ticket for the opposite seat for another guest.

things like that i would give back...almost anything, and i do mean almost anything given to me is given as a gift not saying that anyone has gotten me anything.....hell, no one has except my ex b/f...he bought me a ski jacket and i still have that. that would be of no use to him nor did he want it back. personal items i would keep but if someone were to buy me jewelry and they wanted it back....well, if it's that important to them then they can have it. i'm not going to fight or bicker over something as small as a gift....the gift that i would never give back to him is the gift of memory......memory of the good times as well as the bad, that's something that no one can ever take away from me unless it's taken away do to an accident, memory loss, or old age.
 ponygrl™
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 122
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/29/2006 4:08:35 PM
ladybug.....if it's sentimental things that he got for you, let him have it if it means that much to him but if it's personal belongings....clothes, shoes....make a list of all of your personal items and also shared items as well showing reasonable cause on keeping the property in your posession, then file i'm most sure it's called "theft by deception" charges against him. he would have 30 days to turn your property back over to you or have to pay cash for everything. i'm not sure how much the filing is but you can file in the magistrates office for as high as $5,000.00 in property. anything over and above $5,000.00 you would have to file a civil suit against him in the county courthouse.
 aventurero
Joined: 4/17/2005
Msg: 125
view profile
History
Returning gifts when the relationship ends
Posted: 10/31/2006 8:27:09 PM
Give him back the tickets and get back on the happy pills. Or give them to a skinny guy.
Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  >