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 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 370
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Are people these days 'too picky'...Page 15 of 22    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22)
Yep, life is a long strange trip, and if you are with the wrong guy, it becomes an even longer and stranger trip
 JazzFan333
Joined: 11/1/2007
Msg: 375
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 11/19/2007 8:40:22 AM
Some people are too picky or have unrealistic expectations. They want their potential date to have things that they don't have whether it's a fit / athletic body, money, education level among other things. They have a long list of requirements and reject someone that could be a good match and meets most of their requirements because of some lame reason. Such as a person being a year younger/older than their ideal age range or a person being an inch shorter/taller than their ideal height range. People on this site often mention not to settle. Not settling is great WHEN your standards and expectations are reasonable.
 TitusBreast
Joined: 3/18/2007
Msg: 383
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 11/24/2007 5:21:56 AM
Flaming a$$holes that you're far better off without...those are my thoughts. Love, Titus
 brock11
Joined: 8/6/2007
Msg: 392
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 11/27/2007 10:05:05 AM
Some people are too picky or have unrealistic expectations.


People on this site often mention not to settle. Not settling is great WHEN your standards and expectations are reasonable


I agree with these statements. Everyone is entitled to have some requirements and dealbreakers. However...

1. The more requirements and dealbreakers you have, the more picky you become.
2. The types of requirements and dealbreakers can determine how picky you are. For example a woman that only dates men who are at least 6 ft tall is more picky than a woman that only dates men who are at least 5' 6" tall. A man who only dates women within 5 years of his age is more picky than a man who only dates women within 10 years of his age.
3. What you bring to the table can determine how realisitic your expectations and requirements are. It is reasonable for a woman with a college degree to want a man with a college degree. It is unrealistic for a woman with only a high school diploma to want a man with a college degree. It is reasonable for a fit/athletic man to want a thin/fit woman. It is unrealistic for an obese man to only want a thin/fit woman.
 dsj34
Joined: 11/1/2007
Msg: 397
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 11/27/2007 7:49:04 PM
No, I don't think people are too picky. I have high standards and will not lower them just becuase I decided to see whats out there online.


What is "too picky", exactly? Is it wanting what you want and not settling for anything else?


Many people have made these types of statements on this thread. It is okay to have high standards when you meet the requirements that you want your potential date to meet. Otherwise what you want is much different than what you are realistically able to get. Like some other posters have stated, it is okay NOT to settle when you have realistic expectations. It seems like the people with the high and/or unrealistic expectations are often the same people who complain about not finding a date. Some people will start a thread complaining about their lack of success of POF. When I look at their profiles, they often have a long list of unrealistic requirements.
 jf468
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 409
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 12/25/2007 11:20:37 AM
Yes. Of course people should have some standards and requirements, but I think a lot of people reject a person because of minor reasons. Just read of the some profiles on POF and other dating sites. Exchanging a few emails with a person who isn't your usual type is settling. If there isn't a connection after some emails, phone calls, or dates, then move on. Sometimes a person who is somewhat different than your usual type can be a good match.
 jf468
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 413
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 12/26/2007 7:37:51 AM

Exchanging a few emails with a person who isn't your usual type is settling. If there isn't a connection after some emails, phone calls, or dates, then move on. Sometimes a person who is somewhat different than your usual type can be a good match.


I miswrote. I should have written "Exchanging a few emails with a person who isn't your usual type is NOT settling".
 HOKIEMAN24
Joined: 6/2/2007
Msg: 415
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 12/27/2007 6:59:10 AM
Although I hate to admit it, I really believe I have unrealistic expectations when it comes to a woman but yet know I am not perfect either. So yeah with some regards I would think we all can be a little too picky. But sometimes maybe thats a good thing!!
 jf468
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 430
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/1/2008 1:32:09 PM
People often say "I know what I want and I refuse to settle". However sometimes what a person wants is different than a person is realistically able to get. Sometimes lowering your expectations so they become more realistic is NOT a bad thing.
 Lucky_Vet
Joined: 3/27/2005
Msg: 431
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/1/2008 2:14:31 PM
"...is that why that they stay single, even though they don't want that, either? Your thoughts..."



Unrealistic expectations imposed by a self serving propaganda machine owned and controlled by elites who profit from divide / conquer tactics, socialism, and conflict between races & Sexes.

Buckle your seat belt Dorothy, its only the beginning.
 Masked_Hero
Joined: 12/14/2003
Msg: 437
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/3/2008 9:27:41 AM
You can throw me in the picky catigory... I want a Lamborgini ! Im not leave'n the lot with a Honda civic...
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 438
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/3/2008 9:28:49 AM
Amen Masked Hero!!!

Yeah people are too picky when they pick their nose!! Couldn't resist
 Lucky_Vet
Joined: 3/27/2005
Msg: 441
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/3/2008 10:35:04 PM

Hell--- looking at the national average on divorce rates I would say that people aren't picky enough.


The opposite is quite true, societal / media expectations, and an entire gov't bureaucracy telling people how to run their lives.

Ironically, there is nothing the gov't runs efficient or correct.
 northeast25
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 443
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/17/2008 8:47:54 AM
I can understand being picky about who you marry or have a LTR with. But why be so picky about who you talk to. Exchanging a few emails or even going on a few dates with someone who is somewhat different than your ideal type isn't settling. If there is no connection, then move on. Most people in successful relationships end up with someone who isn't exactly their deal type anyways.

 Sherlock101
Joined: 1/4/2007
Msg: 445
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/20/2008 6:53:52 AM
Ali67m hits the nail on the head being realistic about it all.
I don't think being picky is a bad thing but there is a difference between being picky and looking for an ideal match. I think there are too many factors to over come if you’re looking for an ideal partner. I think it has something to do with the way internet dating sites are set up with the questions they ask or just reading other profiles to get an idea of what you want to write. I have met most dates I've had the old fashioned way being out in public. When you do this someone just catches your eye or you are introduced. You have good conversation and think the person maybe has sparked your interest enough to want to get together with them again so you ask them out or they ask you. I don't remember seeing any criteria list pinned to their forehead. You get together again, learn more about them and if still interested see them till you decide if you might be some kind of match.
Then there's the dreaded old saying, "you never really know someone till you live with them."
 DallasSBF
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 457
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/30/2008 6:16:31 PM
Any old thing will DO????
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 459
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 4/30/2008 7:12:08 PM
Honestly I was born picky and cannot help it. I think deep in my soul there is something I'm searching for and it does go more than physical attraction....when you meet someone ur instincts can tell you whether you should check it out further or not and i listen to my instincts...That can be defined as being picky or knowing what you want.

I think modern technology has made being naturally picky even more refined by being able to get on a dating site such as this and have bigger dating pool or searching for certain characterics or certain aspects of physical appearance....this may result in better match upsand would be interesting tome to see scientific statistics on even picky people having success on dating sites....I for one have had good luck on dating sites and had some of the better dates i've had in my life thru internet dating...just lucky in that respect I guess...
 jon525
Joined: 11/5/2005
Msg: 469
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 6/14/2008 8:44:46 AM
I think it is a combinations of being picky and the throw away relationships.. no one wants to work things out, just trash it and start new. Or for those of you that write, I want someone that will make me happy... I can't make anyone happy but myself, only you can make you happy..
 TxSippiGal
Joined: 9/30/2007
Msg: 484
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 6/21/2008 7:43:09 PM
I don't know if they are that picky.. but I definitely think that they read their ex into their current SO's behaviors... judge to swiftly.. do not weigh and measure the information.. or take the trouble to get to know a person..before deciding it is a bad scene.


People are too picky, they have high expectations because they feel life is too short and they don't want to settle. By the time they know it, they've wasted years looking for "the one" when many great people passed them by. It's one thing to jump into a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship, but another when you find someone you connect with and really enjoy who they are and their company. If things are going good why bail on them because they have a cold sore or whatever very minor?


Love the last sentence.. and says better what I was wanting to say.
 borntoski683
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 487
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:20:39 PM
I think "indifferent" is more the word. I don't think people are "picky" per say, they just aren't getting excited about anyone for a number of reasons. For one thing, although we have the internet and so forth, people have become LESS connected on a personal level, pretty much across the board.
 Stan Powder
Joined: 12/22/2007
Msg: 488
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Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 6/22/2008 12:13:08 AM
I've become pretty picky myself over the years as well, physically and mentally. I know it's not a good thing, but I refuse to find a normal girl and have a normal relationship. That and normal couples are boring, and invite me to the dullest parties.

I think we should all be picky, and choose to seek for our preferences only, whatever they might be.
 celts123
Joined: 5/15/2008
Msg: 489
Are people these days 'too picky'...
Posted: 6/22/2008 3:14:31 PM
Yes. Many people would instantly reject someone because that person doesn't completely match their long list of requirements. Talking to someone or going out on a few dates with someone who isn't exactly your ideal type is not settling. If there isn't any connection after some email / phone conversations or a few dates, then respectfully tell the other person that we aren't a match. Many people in successful relationships end up with someone who isn't exactly their ideal type. Maybe a person who is a little bit shorter, heavier, older etc than your ideal type can be a good match for you.
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