Notice: Forums will be shutdown by June 2019

To focus on better serving our members, we've decided to shut down the POF forums.

While regular posting is now disabled, you can continue to view all threads until the end of June 2019. Event Hosts can still create and promote events while we work on a new and improved event creation service for you.

Thank you!

Plentyoffish dating forums are a place to meet singles and get dating advice or share dating experiences etc. Hopefully you will all have fun meeting singles and try out this online dating thing... Remember that we are the largest free online dating service, so you will never have to pay a dime to meet your soulmate.
     
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 browneyesboo
Joined: 8/14/2015
Msg: 69
Women too pickyPage 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

It's easy to say this as a woman on a dating site, or a guy that just effortlessly has women attracted to him... But you gotta think about how this has to feel for the people at the other end, when who they are and who they're happy being, isn't good enough for anyone.


I don't have men effortlessly attracted to me. I might look okei for my age (yeah beat me up...I said it) but that just means I've got
80 year olds attracted to me. Guys my age are still looking for younger women. I get messages from much younger men, but that's
not what I'm interested in.

My age (regardless of what I look like) works against me.
And there's not much I can do about that.
 jrb1979
Joined: 11/19/2011
Msg: 70
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/1/2015 10:51:29 AM
For me both genders I find now are looking for the perfect partner. It has gone past liking the person for who they are and how they treat them. Its now seems to more about the material side of things. Y0u know how many profiles I have seen on here saying they have their life together and if you want a date you have to have your life together too. It seems now if you don't own your own house, have a good paying job and a car, it gets held against you. Dating was much simpler when I was younger cause you didn't have to deal with so many deal breakers like you do now.
 MrSmith75
Joined: 11/24/2015
Msg: 71
Women too picky
Posted: 12/1/2015 2:29:42 PM

Dating was much simpler when I was younger cause you didn't have to deal with so many deal breakers like you do now.


Yeah those days of picking up Susie and hitting McDonalds for a cheeseburger, fries and a coke looking pretty good now huh? You're in for a treat later on....


My age (regardless of what I look like) works against me.


^^^^ This a thousand times.
 rockstartrucker82
Joined: 11/22/2015
Msg: 72
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/1/2015 4:18:43 PM

Perhaps if people were more picky about their partners there'd be less failed relationships.
Something to think about =)


I'd say have better standards, but dating isn't the place to be picky. True, we all have preferences, but we have no control over who we're emotionally attached to. You can be dating a guy that looks like, what's an actor girls love today... Channing Tatum, and feel absolutely nothing for him, but then realize that your overweight balding friend Doug is the person you want to spend your life with.

When our preferences become requirements, we only hurt ourselves, because there's no guarantee that there's going to be any emotional connection between you and the textbook definition of perfection to you.
 kj521
Joined: 9/20/2015
Msg: 73
Women too picky
Posted: 12/1/2015 4:39:59 PM
"no guarantee that there's going to be any emotional connection between you and the textbook definition of perfection to you."


Got that right Mr. Trucker! No guarantee there will be an emotional connection between you and your textbook definition of imperfection to you either.

Matter of fact....no freakin' guarantee you will find a deep and satisfying emotional connection with anyone.

Sheesh! Life is just crazy like that, I guess. :/


I don't know about you but I like guarantees....oh....and.... I like warranties, too.
No wonder I am not good at dating. :D
 ozarkguy
Joined: 11/15/2007
Msg: 74
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/1/2015 6:00:44 PM
I've found that my OLD preferences are not always the same as what I seem to be attracted to IRL dating. Non-smokers might be the exception. Just because someone meets your picky dating site preferences, that doesn't mean that there will be a connection when you finally meet. Women that I've met on the internet never seem to meet my expectations even after exchanging some emails or chatting on the phone. I'd much rather meet someone IRL that doesn't have all of my picky preferences like hair color, height, education, etc. etc., but someone I'm attracted to when you make that first contact when all of those picky preferences are the last thing on your mind. So I think people tend to get too obsessed with someone meeting their picky preferences. Just find someone you like (and hopefully likes you, too).
 HalftimeDad
Joined: 5/29/2005
Msg: 75
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 10:41:55 AM
I think it's called the paradox of choice.

The sheer number of available singles creates the illusion that there's a perfect guy or gal there, so you don't need to accept any imperfection.
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 76
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 10:53:33 AM

Msg 99:
I don't know about you but I like guarantees....oh....and.... I like warranties, too.
No wonder I am not good at dating. :D


And guys would like money back guarantees in dating
 Chromis1
Joined: 9/9/2015
Msg: 77
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 12:38:13 PM

5'7" is short.


5'7" is shortish


Plenty of shorter man are married and with families but it would not be my choice as I would not want shorter sons.


You mean, "would not have been your choice", given that you're now well past your child-bearing years.

So ... what matters to you now?
 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 78
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 2:26:05 PM
5'7" for a man is within 'average'
Especially for more mature men.
Children are growing taller.
Tom Cruise is 5'7" and other than being a bit weird he is one of the sexiest men on the planet.
Some more examples.
Sylvester Stallone is 5'7"
Billy Joel is 5'5"
Dustin Hoffmanis 5'5"


Go and take a look at a REAL suit of armour.
Or try and walk into an old house or look at an old bed.

Good luck trying to fit nearly anyone of 'average' height into them.

Now for women USA and Australia 'average is 5'31/4 to 5'4"
Most models in magazines or on catwalks are well over 5'10"
Taylor Swift is 5'11"
Kate Middleton is 5'10"
Brooke Shields is 6 foot
Uma Thurman is 6 foot
Nicole Kidman is 5'11" And she married a man 4 inches shorter than her.

So using this logic.
Shorter men are sexier and taller women are sexier.
Yay us!!!!!
Says a 5'8" woman.
 BBEisBack
Joined: 9/16/2015
Msg: 79
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 3:08:37 PM

Go and take a look at a REAL suit of armour.
Or try and walk into an old house or look at an old bed.

Good luck trying to fit nearly anyone of 'average' height into them.


Well You have to consider what Country they're from, too....
I got My height from My Maternal Grandfather, who was Danish, & came from a long line of Taller Men....
My late Wife would Joke about Marrying a Tall Man, so our Kids would be Taller than She was....
She was 5'3", our Daughter is barely 5'0".... The shorter side of our families, beat up on My Tall Genes......
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 80
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 3:13:24 PM
Height and height difference is not that big of a deal when in the horizontal position.
 castlehillsmile
Joined: 11/4/2015
Msg: 81
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 3:32:47 PM
True there are differences in countries.

My relatives are all very tall.
My dad at 6'2" is the runt of the litter.
Men 6'4"- 6'6"
Most of the women on my dad's side also over 6 foot.
My mum is 5'2"
So my short mum and dad stunted my potential growth.

 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 82
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 5:38:08 PM

Go and take a look at a REAL suit of armour.
Or try and walk into an old house or look at an old bed.


That's because the "average" height of the human race overall has increased somewhat over the centuries.



Tom Cruise is 5'7" and other than being a bit weird.....


A "bit" weird?
More than a bit.



he is one of the sexiest men on the planet.


And one of the sexiest men on the planet has 3 failed marriages.(and we're not even talking about Clooney/Showboat.)
I suppose we all ought to give up.



Nicole Kidman is 5'11" And she married a man 4 inches shorter than her.


And in her first appearance on Letterman after the divorce, she offered the dig, "Now I can wear heels again".



If you are shorter then you can build yourself up and at least be broader, to compensate.


Good to know that men have to "compensate" in order to be of any value.



Don't ask people to not be "too" picky.


It's not really about being "too picky" period.
It's about being too picky about the less important things that enable one to have a deep and meaningful relationship, if a deep and meaningful relationship is actually one's goal.
I highly doubt that being 6 feet tall endows a man with magical abilities to conduct a deep and meaningful relationship that men under 6 feet do not have.
I'm pretty sure lots of 6 feet tall men end up in divorce court, too.



Make yourself into someone people want to know.


Whatever happened to being yourself?
Now we have to remold ourselves?



Perhaps if people were more picky about their partners there'd be less failed relationships.
Something to think about =)


Yes.
More picky about the right things.
And not being so distracted by the "shiny objects".
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 83
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 6:53:11 PM
I suspect armour was smaller b/c knights were a lot younger in an age of short life spans. Probably how they could fight so long in summer heat. Having a few colonial homes in my area, I can say they didn't spend a lot on lumber to make things big. maybe they weren't eating their vitamins growing up. As any car fan can tell you, tho, go check out a Model A Ford, or even earlier Tin Lizzie. We're talking 1920-1930's, not that long ago, and you look in and wonder how two people fit side by side.

as for taller ladies, that's due to them having nicer legs. who wants to look at some fellow with hairy Daddylonglegs legs? but a lass with great gams? gosh, that's like a chopper bike with a long front fork--the more, the merrier.
 TheEvolutionOfJessi
Joined: 8/29/2015
Msg: 84
view profile
History
Women too picky
Posted: 12/2/2015 7:18:14 PM


he is one of the sexiest men on the planet.
************
And one of the sexiest men on the planet has 3 failed marriages.(and we're not even talking about Clooney/Showboat.)
I suppose we all ought to give up.


Well not sexy for me... in movie Top Gun I actually adored Anthony Edwards and his character "Goose" and the relationship he had with child and wife (Meg Ryan)
in fact when offered "Tom's" coveralls (part of wardrobing that stayed on the carrier) I declined and asked for those of Anthony Edwards.... (I do think my friends were teasing us gals a bit though... )



That's because the "average" height of the human race overall has increased somewhat over the centuries.


Yeup, the thangs ya learn from Ghost Tours of Convict sites... 'solitary' cells built under Church foyers that took the 'average' convict of 5 foot 6 (If I recall correctly) and were as low as 27 inches.....
only 200 years here in this town... now the gents are in the 6foot plus region.... gets harder and harder for a gal like me, even wearing heels - to kiss a bloke up there - especially when they're sporting a belly too.

My 'last' situationship, the bloke was actually around five nine, and was not my 'physical' type but he presented well and was most intelligent... we had great conversations... although I actually now realise I was taking many of his questions 'literally'... and he really didn't value my answers.... but I found the conversation was intriguing and that is something I'm picky about. (and then there was the polar opposite [same height] person 'friend-zoned' who while I was conversing, was watching the cricket over my shoulder and wore flip flops and sweats to the cinema... throwing bare feet up on the back of the chair next row down... )

Of course we're picky and have standards.... we want (and to a degree need) from only a small region of the spectrum of humankind.... hopefully, within the region of where we ourselves are at.... (the proverbial "needle in a haystack" if you will)
 browneyesboo
Joined: 8/14/2015
Msg: 85
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 7:57:45 AM

Whatever happened to being yourself?
Now we have to remold ourselves?


Are you kidding me? People "remold" themselves all the time.
They lose weight, they gain weight, they take up a hobby, they
start excercising, they go back to school, they move, they change
jobs...the list goes on.

Yeah...if what you're doing isn't working...do something else.

I was going to cut and paste every sentence in your post and
make a comment on it, but it's lunchtime.
Who seriously has time for that stuff??
 Maleman999
Joined: 2/14/2010
Msg: 86
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 8:21:27 AM

The sheer number of available singles creates the illusion that there's a perfect guy or gal there, so you don't need to accept any imperfection.


And, of course, there is the illusion that this perfect person just happens to live in the same town/neighborhood and is compatible in every way.
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 87
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 8:56:12 AM

............. but it's lunchtime.


LOL, OK Ms Boo, I'll have a grilled cheese sandwich made with Texas toast, and a mug of hot tomato soup. The day is cold, grey and dreary. Ready for some comfort food!

?????Women TOOOOOOO picky!?
No not at all. I just want, what I want, when I want it, the way I like it. Sooooo what's the problem?
 ShowboatSupreme
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 88
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 10:00:33 AM
Vote NO on FUSSY !
 Ladyinred4755
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 89
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 10:16:39 AM
^ ^ ^ ^ ^ Wait a sec, we have to vote on this? Are you kiddin' me? I have to trot down to the fair grounds and wait in line, sign the voter reg card thingy, wait in line some more, then go hide behind a little curtain, just so I can vote yay or nay to FUSSY?
Now I really want lunch with comfort food!
Too picky? Pffft!
 FullMoonGuy
Joined: 3/7/2014
Msg: 90
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 11:20:06 AM

Are you kidding me? People "remold" themselves all the time.
They lose weight, they gain weight, they take up a hobby, they
start excercising, they go back to school, they move, they change
jobs...the list goes on.


That's not "remolding" who you are as a person.

Like an introvert becoming the life of the party.

Or a extroverted gladhanding backslapper becoming withdrawn.

Or a "free spirit" suddenly becoming rigid and buttoned-down.

Or an adrenaline junkie suddenly becoming a couch potato.

A person can change jobs all they want, doesn't change who they basically are as a human being.
 ShowboatSupreme
Joined: 11/10/2015
Msg: 91
Women too picky
Posted: 12/3/2015 11:57:15 PM
I choose to think that the 'core' of a person is evident at 5 years old or so.

Sometimes you can catch a glimpse of the person's core, but it gets harder with age and bias.

The innocent, conniving, manipulative, kind, etc. etc.

That core is always there somewhere beneath the surface.

No matter what your life experience is, you can't hide your core for too long.

It always shines through :)
 south_city
Joined: 10/12/2013
Msg: 92
Women too picky
Posted: 12/4/2015 6:41:18 AM

So you can't stereo type "woman want this" or "men want that" because you really have no idea =)


Of course, there can be some exceptions. But in general, there are traits that will make a person more or less appealing. In particular with OLD. A man that is short, overweight, and doesn't have a college degree will probably have a smaller potential dating pool.
 TrvstInKarma
Joined: 9/1/2015
Msg: 93
Women too picky
Posted: 12/4/2015 8:02:02 AM
I love tall men - at least 5'10" or taller, but not taller than about 6'4". Yes, I'm picky. And I wouldn't want a guy who is not picky himself. Don't want to be someone's last resort or second choice.
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  >