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 cfb62
Joined: 9/17/2007
Msg: 257
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38 and thinking its too latePage 4 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
I don't believe in soulmates.
They're just in the movies.
 djscretefun
Joined: 12/7/2008
Msg: 258
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 12/23/2008 2:25:04 PM
I personally do not think its ever too late to find your soulmate, so hang in there!
 Degobah
Joined: 7/29/2008
Msg: 259
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 12/26/2008 10:18:23 PM
You just NEVER know.

I have felt those same things at times in my life and now at 42 I have met a person who could have been a s/m pretty easily. It won't happen due to other issues, but she came out of nowhere and BAM those same feelings of connection snapped to the forefront of our minds.

Don't expect it, don't search for it, just be you and be OPEN to it.

Cheers.
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 261
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38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 12/27/2008 12:04:02 AM
If you believe you've lost, then you've already lost the most important battle --with yourself.
As long as you breathe, you must believe there is hope. I have relatives who have married when they were 48. Year after year, they show up single at all the parties we have, then one day, they just show up with someone at their side and they're the ONE!
 ByronHayes
Joined: 1/30/2009
Msg: 265
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/4/2009 4:54:36 PM
There's no such thing big man. The only thing 38 is too late for is for you to be soo naive and I don't mean that personal.
 voiceof911
Joined: 1/3/2009
Msg: 268
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/4/2009 8:10:21 PM
It's all about your attitude. I am much older than you and still looking. I know that someday I will find him. Keep a positive attitude.
 barbee1970
Joined: 12/29/2008
Msg: 269
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/4/2009 9:02:00 PM
I'm 38 and have my doubts. All of the good ones were taken long ago. I get the ones on Clearance all the time. These seem to be the rejected men, no one else wants. I give up sometimes.
 implode
Joined: 11/13/2008
Msg: 271
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/11/2009 12:18:10 AM
I agree. If you find your soulmate you are either incredibly lucky or incredibly average.
 RandyG70
Joined: 2/28/2008
Msg: 277
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38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 3/18/2009 8:49:18 PM
Its not so much my age Im worried about. What worries me when the night is long and my thoughts are dark is this....what if Ive met the one for me already and missed my chance. If that is the case then what should I do now? Should I try to find someone that I can put up with,and someone who can put up with me? I know its hard to believe but Im not perfect..no no..dont argue, its true,really it is.
 anonymouslyme
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 281
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 3/18/2009 11:18:58 PM
I was 37 when I left a 20 year marriage. There was no one local I had any interest in dating, so I went on two dating sites. Lots of communication with nice but blah people...went on a few dates, but found myself thinking "He's nice, but I'd rather be watching a movie at home with my son". I was pretty sure that if I was ever with anyone else, it would be someone I just settled for in order not to be lonely. I decided that if that were going to be the case, I might as well just take my profiles down, and focus on spending my time with my son for the time being, as he's getting to that age where he will soon be "leaving the nest". I make good money, have great friends and family, so I wasn't feeling desperate to "fill the void". I still "window shopped" anonymously from time to time, but with very little enthusiasm. (I think it's possible to sort of burn out on the whole internet dating thing) One day I read a profile that for some reason just resonated within me, so I decided to reactivate my account and send an email. Took the guy almost a week to respond back....by then I had already decided that nothing was going to come of it. But I sent a note back anyway, and we started talking on messenger. He was so honest and forthcoming, and he always understood where I was coming from when we talked. Still, I didn't want to get my expectations set too high. I knew I hadn't kissed my share of frogs yet lol. We chatted intermittently for a few weeks then decided to meet. I'm not one to lose my head and jump headfirst into things, and neither is he...but I'm telling you, the moment I laid my eyes on him, I knew he was mine. And he knew it too. There may as well have been an audible ~click~. That was just about two years ago, and I could never have imagined how sweet life could be when you're sharing it with the "right" person. Is he perfect? Nope, far from it (as am I) but he is perfect for me. Sometimes we talk about how crazy it is, being almost 40 and suddenly having everything fall into place. Sometimes we lament that we didn't meet 20 years ago, but then we agree that we weren't who we are today as individuals, and probably wouldn't have connected on the level that we did.

So to answer your question....I think your soulmate is placed in your path when you are truly ready to recieve them.
 skeptik
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 282
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 3/19/2009 6:36:07 PM
I don't believe in "soul mates". You will find someone. You may want to look somewhere other than online. I though online would be the fast track since you can instantly communicate if you want but find it is in my opinion frustrating and a lot of the people on dating sites have a significant other and aren't even looking to date. Maybe try a singles get together or even the personal ads in the newspaper.
 c_deacon
Joined: 3/13/2005
Msg: 284
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38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 3/21/2009 11:56:26 AM
I agree......

And if you think it is over at 38, you will be more than dismayed at 48 and 58.......

Never say never, and do not ever think it is to late for meeting that one(s) that can enrich your life, and let you enrich theirs......in all the right places and ways.......

Just my opinion.........
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 286
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/12/2009 1:27:33 AM
twenty years ago they didnt have soulmates, twenty years from now you wont understand your tv remote. There are worse things in the world than being single, foot loose, responsibility free and answering to noone but your own whim, cash, and wanderlust. Its a big wide wet world out there.

Or you could sit at home and make your bucketlist of all the other things that never apperate either....
Lottery winnings
Nobel Prize
Bill Gates' Inheritence
Your own Reality TV Show
.....
 Chitownguy40
Joined: 9/29/2009
Msg: 291
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/13/2009 6:41:11 PM
There is no such a thing as a "soul mate," and people who wait around for one are likely to end up alone. No two people are perfectly compatible. Every relationship involves compromises. There is no settling down without some settling for.

That said, dating gets damned hard after 30. After 30, that pool of single, available people dries up as folks get married or enter serious LTRs. Not sure what the solution is. I do feel that as hard as it is for men, it is even harder for women. At least you're going to find women in their 30s who want to meet you. Most guys your age are looking for women who are much youger than them--in their 20s. Good luck.
 Cynderella
Joined: 3/8/2007
Msg: 295
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38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/15/2009 6:00:59 PM
I have a sneakie feelin' this could be true...
 Chitownguy40
Joined: 9/29/2009
Msg: 299
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/23/2009 5:31:54 AM
If you're waiting for a soul mate, it was too late when you were 12. Soul mates don't exist.
 RitaRusk
Joined: 10/10/2008
Msg: 303
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38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/23/2009 3:32:31 PM
Well I certainly hope not tml2c! as others have posted I also find myself single again at38 and although I am possibly now comming out the other end of that whole 1 soul mate or nought nonsense (that seems to be easier to buy into when we are in our 20s) I very much believe that there are plenty of other 30 somethings out there who like me ...
dont just want 1 nighters
enjoy being part of a partnership
rather be single at 38 and at peace with your life than with someone (as a LOT of the poeple I know are) who is...
not right for u
does not make you happy
keep the faith...whats ment will happen as they say!
 Toot Sweet13
Joined: 10/5/2008
Msg: 304
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/28/2009 8:42:32 PM
So...did you meet your soul mate yet?


I didn't read through the thread, just thought I'd ask.
 bsp71
Joined: 11/18/2009
Msg: 305
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/28/2009 8:44:29 PM
Never say never, I am almost 39 and still have hope. Especially now that I am financially independent and have a great career and life to attract the right mate.
 NiceBlkGuyOhio
Joined: 3/22/2009
Msg: 308
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 11/29/2009 9:18:14 AM
Well I agree with you!!!I'm in the same boat
 FluffyBrain
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 312
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 1/15/2010 8:13:07 AM
op,
you're getting to the age where lots of people start divorcing, so don't worry, you'll find plenty of singles as you move into your 40's. sad commentary, but it has certainly changed the demographics. relax and enjoy!
 anonymouslyme
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 314
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 1/19/2010 5:57:19 AM
I was 37 when I got divorced after 20 years... dated a few 'nothing specials', and definately thought that 'spark' was gone forever, for me. Then my neighbor insisted I meet his friend, who had been divorced about the same amount of time as I had, and had been dating 'nothing specials' as well... I actually sent him away twice, because my heart and mind were so closed off to the possibility that anything magnificent would happen in my life, and frankly, I just didn't feel like being bothered. We happened to bump into each other at the video store one night, and decided to hang out as freinds, with no expectations. After a few weeks of that, I began to see him in a completely different light. That was almost a year ago, and today, he is the one I can't picture myself without.

The word soulmate kinda gags me too, but we can spend days on end together, and never tire of each other's company. When one of us needs to get something taken care of, the other is right beside them, supporting in whatever way is possible.

I actually think later in life is when the very best relationships are possible, because you have a much clearer picture of what you're looking for, and you're much less likely to take things for granted. At 40, I can honestly say I have never felt more loved in my life, and I've never wanted to give on the level I do now either.

I can't say what will happen for you, but I do suggest you keep an open heart, and believe in the possibility. It does happen, I've seen it.
 DallasSBF
Joined: 8/30/2007
Msg: 316
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/25/2010 9:03:48 PM
There is no such thing as a soul mate. But there is a chance you will meet a couple of people who would be a really good match for you. Now the hard part is figuring out what is your good match. That is my hard part too. That is everyone's hard part.
 valenciacityx
Joined: 3/10/2009
Msg: 317
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/26/2010 1:06:23 AM
If you are seeking perfection, you will never find it. You are indeed late to that lesson.
 Hey Whos This Guy
Joined: 6/30/2009
Msg: 318
38 and thinking its too late
Posted: 2/28/2010 6:32:32 PM
The harder you search, the longer it will take.
I'm 43 this summer. Marriage/rel'nship of a loonngg time ended just after 40.
I've met someone amazing, my missing piece.
Don't search, and what you seek will find you.
Go read the Alchemist if you want a little boost in your faith/patience duder...
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