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 jpneok
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 23
Still a virgin!?Page 3 of 5    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5)
33 here, same boat. Although I've only had 1.25 dates in my life, i've had more than my share of "opportunities", most from girls on the internet who I'd talk to for a while and they seemed nice and then I get a message like "Oh and I'll be in (local town) next weekend if you want to..." can't remember her exact wording but it was unmistakable, and shocking since she had seemed so "normal" (my perception, my opinion). I think the idea of being a virgin shouldn't be the main focus of worry or concern, because I feel the more important thing is that I don't like being a "relationship virgin", to have an intimate and important deep connection - if someone likes you enough to share that with you, then they won't care about your inexperience - and if they do... can't say I'd recommend keeping them.
 thebigslim
Joined: 9/27/2005
Msg: 25
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/13/2006 11:51:00 PM
ok, i know this is suppost to be "ask a girl", but just wanted to say to the OP, good for you that you are still a virgin..... just turned 27 myself and in the same boat, with the same logic as you. I focused on my education and career. and i can relate to the guy friends who dont understand why you choose this path, for me i just tell them cause i have bigger things to worry bout than that.... plain and simple. that and the fact when i do loose it, it will be towards someone who i have very deep feelings for, so until that happens, im proud to be "pure" in this day and age. in case you are curious to more peoples opinions and thoughts, check out my thread on the subject, its a deceant read.

http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts3856364.aspx
 shewhofishes
Joined: 4/15/2006
Msg: 30
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/23/2006 1:27:59 PM
Actually, it's true that a number of things can break the hymen before a girl or woman has sex. I can't tell you if she was telling you the truth about being a virgin, but perhaps you shouldn't dwell on it and accept what she told you as truth. Even if you don't really believe her, you can't really prove it....it's probably best to assume she was being truthful, so you don't carry any anger. :-)
Sorry, didn't mean to lecture....I just wanted you to know that hymens can break and, in fact, some females are born without them.
 belly18dancer
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 35
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/23/2006 5:36:00 PM
I think it's great in this day and age that any one male or female can stay a virgin til 21. I myself was 19 when I met my ex husband....

i've been with a guy who claimed he was a virgin...i took his word for it...he could have been lying...i thought it was cool that i was his first....he said he wanted an older woman...he was small and embarrassed by it..and figured a girl his own age might be put off by his size....

my daughter dated a drop dead gorgeous guy last year who was a virgin...well for a little while...til she got hold of him....he almost broke up with her after their first time because it stressed him out so bad that he wasn't sure if it had been the right thing to do

so make sure whoever u choose to be your first...it's the right person for u...and no one you'll regret later....someone you trust and care for...and know very well....it will make the first time a pleasure to remember
 thebigslim
Joined: 9/27/2005
Msg: 39
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/27/2006 9:58:51 AM
Also there are three main types of virgins:
1)religious - *yawn*, no patience for that crap
2)choosy, careful, selective - why not, I would not think badly of such a case
3)lack of opportunity virgins, way WAY too fixated on sex and his futile pursuit - always feel ill at ease with these individuals. Seems their entire life force is directed toward that one narrow goal


well looks like i follow under the # 2 catagory, but with slight lack of opportunity from # 3. too bad you are all the way in alberta planetsatan, cause it would be nice to find a woman who didnt make sex a primary on their list around over here....kudos goes to you

i actually have a thread along this line of subject that is a deceant read for anyone who is interested

http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts3856364.aspx

check it out and leave a comment.

p.s. you are probably tired of hearing this, but wow are you beautiful!!!
 TolsmaLMC
Joined: 9/6/2004
Msg: 40
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/27/2006 10:13:53 AM
It's hard to be a virgin these days. It takes alot of strength for many people. Good for you, man. It's too bad that so many people today hear the word "virginity" and think of it as something to get rid of as soon as possible. And if you're doing it for religious reasons or because you want to obey God, you have nothing to be ashamed of.
 jpneok
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 42
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/27/2006 8:25:28 PM
Sounds like you need a blog.

But seriously, you admittedly REALIZE your problems, and that YOU are continuing some of them, with bad self talk and being overcritical of your own image - that is NOT attractive or compelling to women - YOU have to work on yourself FIRST so YOU are okay with you, otherwise it won't matter who you're with, YOU won't be okay with THEM - I have learned this, and am learning this, from experience. Put energy and effort into forward progress, don't criticize yourself on your failures or lack, but credit yourself on your achievement and realize it CAN be done, regardless of your past - you are your OWN person and you've overcome so MUCH and can overcome so much MORE. I'm a virgin more or less by lack of dates as well but that doesn't mean I would intentionally lose it just because I was able to - I've had it this long, why the hell just throw it away now when I can at least save it for someone I trust and have it mean something to me.
 NaTeRaS
Joined: 6/8/2006
Msg: 43
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/27/2006 9:28:01 PM
i wouldnt care as long as when it came down to crunch time that you werent all childish and scared and stuff (well you will be a little bit). Nothing turns a girl off more then a guy who isnt confident. So when you find your girl and decide to go for it, then be confident and just pretend like you know what your doing.

And if your girl is a virgin too then AWESOME!!!!
 TheBigID
Joined: 8/7/2006
Msg: 44
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/28/2006 11:52:55 AM
Actually, a 21 year old virgin is not that uncommon. About 25-45% of high school graduates are still virgins (depending on location). That number doesn't likely drop dramatically in only a few years.

I'd say, don't sweat it.
 TheBigID
Joined: 8/7/2006
Msg: 46
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/28/2006 1:35:57 PM
I'm like a born again virgin, so don't sweat it.
 chuckwagon28
Joined: 3/28/2006
Msg: 48
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/31/2006 3:11:39 PM
i know what you guys are going through the friends i used to have ragged me about it non stop im a 28 year old virgin ive had opertunity but i al ways felt like i was just using the girl so my conscience would not let me go through with it it is the hardest thing to have in this century
 pink506
Joined: 1/5/2005
Msg: 50
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/31/2006 9:34:27 PM
I have a male friend that was married a virgin and he was 28! Being a virgin is great.. keep it as long as you can!
 TedJMill
Joined: 7/6/2005
Msg: 52
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 9/1/2006 9:43:15 AM
Also there are three main types of virgins:
1)religious - *yawn*, no patience for that crap
2)choosy, careful, selective - why not, I would not think badly of such a case
3)lack of opportunity virgins, way WAY too fixated on sex and his futile pursuit - always feel ill at ease with these individuals. Seems their entire life force is directed toward that one narrow goal


You could add my type as the fourth, the asexual virgin. I've just never been interested enough in having sex to make an effort to stop being a virgin.
 jpneok
Joined: 7/20/2006
Msg: 53
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 9/1/2006 10:16:59 AM
Thats more or less me as well - doesn't mean not interested in intimacy though.
 niceiowaguy
Joined: 12/10/2005
Msg: 61
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 11/17/2006 9:32:49 AM
If a guy who is still virgin at the age of 21, thats no problem..but he needs some experience before having sex with a lady cause sometimes his first time having sex, it wont be good.

I suggest that he should have some experience but just be careful!
 no_1_bby
Joined: 5/3/2006
Msg: 62
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 11/17/2006 9:55:14 AM
My ex was a virgin when I met him and we started dating.. he was nearly 24. Don't give in to peer pressure. Stand up for what you believe and to heck with your friends.
 NewWestCleanCut
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 63
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 11/17/2006 4:06:57 PM
I'm still a virgin at 19 I think it's pathetic haha, but I'm so into oral sex I don't know do u think it would be a big disappointment? (penetration)? main reasons was I was afraid of getting a disease or someone pregnant, but I'm scared anymore anyways.

-peace out, Luke
 NewWestCleanCut
Joined: 9/29/2006
Msg: 65
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 11/23/2006 11:48:37 AM
lol I meant I'm NOT scared anymore haha. there we go. but I mean if it happens it happens I'm in no rush but if I meet someone who shares passion with me then it will happen.

thank you Tusha. haha I don't get it but thank you.

-peace out, Luke
 Akiros
Joined: 4/14/2008
Msg: 71
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/29/2008 4:44:24 PM
Hey man more power to you. Nothing wrong with being a virgin at all in my book. I personally wished i waited but that day has long come and gone. It will allow you to meet a girl thats actually worth something if she has the same morals and values as someone that has waited so long. You can have a relationship with someone without the bull**** that sex brings into the mix and find out what the person is really like. Just hang in their bro! You'll find your misses right one day.
 Rythmn
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 74
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Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/31/2008 10:22:31 PM
i never had a problem with an individual's sexual choices. what i do have a problem with is "definition". doing all sorts of bizarre sexual things with everyone and everything, BUT still a technical virgin. gotta wonder! sexual energy is sexual energy, no matter how you invest it. if it's part of love, then that is more important to me than a marriage license. i do however, believe in love, monogamy and the commitment to the long term, no matter how it's done on paper. lived too long, to pretend any more. coupling today is a nightmare. people are way too narcisstic or on the other extreme too fearful. as they get older, too pessimistic or too lazy or just too exhausted to work on relationships. where is the Middle Way? where is the Hope? where is the Trust? where is the Wisdom?
 Pete73052
Joined: 1/29/2006
Msg: 75
Still a virgin!?
Posted: 8/31/2008 10:37:52 PM
Well, at least you don't have STD's. But if your little buddy doesn't see some action by the time you're 30, you should really get that thing looked at by a pro. As someone reminded us - God likes Virgins.
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