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 canyunflyer
Joined: 2/6/2006
Msg: 104
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When is flirting cheating?Page 2 of 18    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18)
If your partner is not pleased at your on line activities... you are cheating. If she is... then she is probably in denial or just dumb! You are robbing your primary relationship of valuable 'emotional' and 'spiritual' energy. Thats cheating in my book.

I've been single for over 8 years. Personally, I don't like people like you who are in relationships contaminating the personals with their disordered needs and agendas! When you made the choice to enter into a marriage with your partner, you also made the choice to give up the personals. Get the Hell out of here!

And then you have the audacity to come on here posting a thread wondering if you are innapropropriate??? YES! And. As you can plainly see.... 99 percent aggree with me. Please take their answers (advice) literally and wipe yourself out of here.. and anyother personals you are in. If you are not satisfied with your wife... do her a big favor and leave her. Even if you do that.... please wait for at least a year before coming in here. You have some work to do.
 Internetdatingpariah
Joined: 10/17/2004
Msg: 129
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 10/8/2006 5:19:26 AM
I don't consider it cheating...of course one person's flirting is another person's normal behavior. Just who they are. It's only cheating if it goes beyond flirting.

People flirt without even knowing it sometimes. Kindness and compassion can be misconstued(sp) as being flirtatious.
 sexygreeneyess7
Joined: 12/6/2004
Msg: 136
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 10/13/2006 8:14:07 AM
FLIRTING IS NOT CHEATING THERE IS NO TOUCHING
 SteveHD
Joined: 3/9/2005
Msg: 137
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 10/13/2006 10:11:09 AM

Love to hear your views - have you been there?


Tell your partner.

Tell the women you flirt with or not...whatever you prefer.

You don't have to wear a big banner that says you're taken, but let your partner in on it.

Also...try flirting more with your partner the same way you flirt with women online.
 onemooncircles
Joined: 9/26/2006
Msg: 143
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/2/2006 8:46:34 AM
What you are doing is flirting with danger. You need to ask yourself what this is doing for you. You must have some need that isn't being met. Could be excitement, an ego boost, or you toying with the idea of actually cheating. What happens when you find someone online who mets your needs? Where do you go from there?

You can't even begin to share this with your wife until you figure out why you feel the need to do this. But she deserves to have the chance to meet all of your needs. So, go figure this out, talk to her, and work it out with her.

You know you aren't doing the right thing or you wouldn't be asking all of us.

Moon
 PRINCESSFIFI
Joined: 11/19/2006
Msg: 145
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/2/2006 2:19:42 PM
just like dr.Phil says "people who have nothing to hide.......hide nothing" pretty lame lol! but true-relationships are about trust and honesty and if it really is all innocent why not just tell her so she has the option of either accepting you or not. by being true to her you are being true to yourself and thats pretty liberating
 treemanbdj
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 152
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/13/2006 6:05:14 AM
^^^^^Ah, lighten up a bit^^^^


I bet chances are you do it, and don't realize it. I believe innuendos are often flirting....maybe I'm wrong.

Nothing wrong with light hearted flirting. I do notice that my female friends that I have known 10,20 0r more years seem to be a little stronger with it now then the eariler years. (note almost ALL are in good relationships or married)

I post before, but another answer came to mind that is the clencher for when flirting becomes cheating.

When you're in over your head and up to your @ss

For the guys that is.

B
D
J
 lyin eyes
Joined: 6/11/2006
Msg: 154
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/13/2006 10:11:14 AM
Flirting is just that using your personality,charm to get attention.Harmless as flirting is,some do take a flirt as serious.Wellthen you have a problem.I myself love to flirt,have always been.But I ALSO CAN STEP BACK AND SEE IF SOMEONE IS TAKING IT THE WRONG WAY.I think in flirting its harmless till taken out of context.When that happens you have a problem.
 lyin eyes
Joined: 6/11/2006
Msg: 157
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/13/2006 1:08:57 PM
Yes but if your not with a better half you can flirt allyou want.And it helps to feel better
 haywiresue
Joined: 9/27/2006
Msg: 160
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 12/15/2006 9:21:32 AM
I think flirting is totally subjective. If you are married you are in a different place than single people or people in a "committed" relationship.

If you are single - anything goes as you only answer to yourself.

If you are married you have the feelings of another to consider, does your wife/husband know and if so how would they feel. If I was married and I was not hiding an affair or looking for an affair, I would have no problem letting my husband either join me while on the forums as entertainment or reading what I post, as I could never cheat on someone I gave my heart to - just not me and I expect the same in return from someone who gives me their heart.

If you are in a "committed" relationship - to me this means that you are looking to see if this relationship is on its way to getting married. So, once again you would need to consider the feelings of your partner and include your partner to participate in the forums if you are really only on them for fun and not "shopping" for something else or something on the side.

To all the single people who have a problem with married people on this site "suck it up" as forums are about conversation, sharing ideas, thoughts and a place to ask questions. There are as many dishonest single people out there as there are married or "commintted", so do your homework and look after yourself.
 PRINCESSFIFI
Joined: 11/19/2006
Msg: 174
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 7/5/2007 11:31:34 PM
i think flirting is cheating when you are interacting with people in a way that if your partner found out he wouldnt be happy about it...everyone has their own limitations in relationships on what they consider acceptable or not...why dont you just be honest with him about what you are doing and if hes cool with it,you can get rid of this guilt feeling and if he doesnt like what ur doing, then you could reassess the relationship and decide what is more valuable to you
 44magnum
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 180
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 7/31/2007 12:51:44 AM
Better yet, when is cheating flirting?
 * L *
Joined: 7/13/2007
Msg: 181
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 7/31/2007 1:00:46 AM
when its done with no clothes on
 44magnum
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 182
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 7/31/2007 1:22:05 AM
Ohhh, I get it now! Thanks mb! What would I do without you?
 44magnum
Joined: 6/9/2007
Msg: 187
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 7/31/2007 10:20:19 AM
I truly believe cheating begins in the mind, If I'm in a relationship and I'm flirting, I ask myself What are my intentions? Is it just for laughs? Is it to maybe cheer the person up? If I'm flirting, and go home with the flirtee on my mind, then maybe I need to evaluate the relationsip I'm in.
 4408joseph
Joined: 1/10/2008
Msg: 198
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/25/2008 11:24:51 AM
When you are going over your monthly Credit Card statment and there are Way tooooooooooooo many entries showing up for ......
Cheap Motels!!
 Ignoble
Joined: 10/11/2007
Msg: 199
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/25/2008 11:31:13 AM
Unless it involves nudity coupled with masturbation its NEVER cheating.
 ThisNameBeenTaken
Joined: 11/12/2007
Msg: 201
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/25/2008 1:08:11 PM
When is cheating flirting? No clue.

But consider this....you really learn a lot about where you are in life, by the quality of people that flirt with you. I was in a store the other day, and a really entirely unattractive, unkept, disshevled woman began flirting with me. I was horrified.

Have I really fallen so far that THIS is the kind of person that would think she should be flirting with me?

So, needless to say, I went directly to the gym and began doing crunches.
 nocalsingledad
Joined: 11/27/2007
Msg: 204
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/25/2008 1:33:07 PM

When does flirting count as cheating?


When you break a vow or a promise. If you are not married and have made no explicit promise of fidelity, it is technically impossible to "cheat" as there is no obligation of fidelity outside of marriage unless you have given your word. If you have made no such promise, there can be no such expectation. Other people's opinions notwithstanding.

If you aren't married, have made no promises, but have lived together for 10 years in a location that has no "common law" marriage statute, then you are two single individuals who can do as you please.
 nocalsingledad
Joined: 11/27/2007
Msg: 207
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When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/25/2008 4:00:29 PM
Lara, maybe you misread my posting. You said:



i.e., you have agreed to be exclusive


The agreement is the key. I said that if you have not made an agreement ... a promise, given your word ... then there is no default expectation of fidelity outside of marriage.

If you have agreed to be exclusive then you break the agreement the moment you have sex with another unless you have defined "exclusive" in even more restrictive terms in your agreement.

You are not disagreeing with me, you just said the same thing I did.

But as far as the other person's "feelings", a person can not live their life in accordance to how someone else feels about it. That can lead one to being manipulated or being placed in a very unhealthy situation if they are ever in a relationship with someone who can not properly regulate their emotions. It makes sense when you are in a relationship with a healthy, well-balanced, emotionally regulated person but not when you are (as I once found myself) in a relationship with a person whose emotional response and "feelings" are different than one might normally expect them to be.

A person feels what they feel. I am not going to do one action or a different action in order to change how they feel. That is called "walking on eggshells". Sure, you can take feelings into consideration but you can't be ruled by someone else's feelings.
 oceancowgirl9
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 215
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/29/2008 4:53:04 AM
Well I find that is usaully an act when people need a bigger stage ..They are quite insecure if they so much more then the one they love.If they go on to see who will enjoy them on a relationship site and have a significant other yes I find it is cheating..Absolutely...get real be true to them and to you,get off lline and put all your energy into the present relationship or dont even start one. LV
 oceancowgirl9
Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 216
When is flirting cheating?
Posted: 1/29/2008 4:54:26 AM
I disagree it gives the wrong signal to people and could mess there heads up especially if you already in a relationship.Talk is no longer cheap!L
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