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Show ALL Forums  > Relationships  > why do men always have to look at other women!!      Home login  
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 Boots168
Joined: 3/22/2009
Msg: 76
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why do men always have to look at other women!!Page 4 of 27    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27)
The reasons why we have TWO eyes is, not only do we admire the hottie in our arms, we are also 'visually drawn' to eye candies around us, males and females alike cuz it's human nature to like beautiful things. Hmmm does it make me bi just because of that? LOL

I don't mind my guy checking out other hotties AT ALL, the truth is, I love checking them out with him.
 gentleplus
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 77
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/23/2009 8:10:07 PM
Thanks shipoker58 for your clarity and wisdom.... nuff said
 VivaciousVixen2010
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 78
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/23/2009 9:24:41 PM
we have eyes and are going to see the world around us. it does not mean that my man is checking out another woman. there is a difference between being a dog and just noticing your environment.

if you feel that your man is a dog and disrespecting you then you should dump him.
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 79
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/23/2009 9:52:00 PM
Well put by SpiffyKat in message 160 below

"I dont think there is anything wrong with respectfully appreciating the attractiveness of the opposite sex even when youre on a date with your partner:) I think its uncool to look others up and down for long periods of time to the point of getting whip lash from turning your head so far to get a better look ..lol..Save that for the guys nights out We all look,and I think its human nature to do so. "

I couldn't agree more....
 giants84
Joined: 12/10/2008
Msg: 80
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 1:25:31 AM
What can we do if god made us that way, but you should not complain if they look and not touch. That's just how it is deal with it ;).
 gtomustang
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 81
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 5:18:50 AM
Just because *it* looks like a lightswitch, doesn't mean you can switch it off

really, its just simple biology, helping the species to survive. The real test is, does he treat you better, worse, or the same as he treats others?

Love isn't about what happens in the bedroom, its what happens outside....
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 82
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:22:12 AM
I will admire an attractive man if he walks in the room. As it has been stated many times it is normal and human nature, but I personally don't "ogle" them ...I think it comes down to this...Are you admiring them? or Are you "ogling" them? Do you have some self control? Do you want them to see you and hold your stare until they see you? Did you totally forget the person you are with for a moment? Will this be a habit with them? Will it get on your last nerve if they do this all the time? Do they have "Dating Attention Deficit Disorder"? LOL... I dated guy few years back that was bad to do this...I am now very glad I'm not dating him anymore...it was annoying... Some guys were not as bad as he was about it...

It's all about categorizing what kind of glance or stare it is... A perceptive woman or man knows the difference...
 newblue1970
Joined: 3/7/2008
Msg: 83
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:43:35 AM

there is no "grass may be greener on the other side" behavior..

But that is NOT what looking at someone means, at least for me. I'm not contemplating that I want them, that I'd like to meet them, or have a chance with them. Its strictly that I find women attractive and therefore I like looking at them.

People like looking at things they find appealing. If I've seen a gorgeous sunset, does that mean I should avoid all other sunsets or never look at another one cause I've already seen one? Or say I have a really nice Corvette that I'm happy with, but then in a parking lot I see another very nice looking Corvette, I'm going to look. Do I want that car? Do I have to drive that car? No, I'm very happy with MY car, but I just like looking at other nice cars.

My first real GF had no problem with me looking. She even pointed out cute girls on the beach for me. And she enjoyed all the male sights she could see as well, which was perfectly fine with me. Meeting, flirting, talking to - THAT is a problem. Just looking? Please...
 davidsauvignon
Joined: 2/6/2008
Msg: 84
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 12:09:05 PM
I think you're right Helen.

And I like LadyBoBina's approach!







~ds~
 PirateJohn09
Joined: 1/7/2009
Msg: 85
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 12:38:29 PM
Not weird .. just evolved I am the same way.. when I am with someone I care about I don't have the urge to gawk at anyone else...

So because you behave a certain way, that means eveyone who behaves differently isn't sufficiently "evolved?"


Its also about core respect which is lost on many these days..

I've come to realize that many people define "respect" as "you must behave the way I want you to behave." So many people demand "respect" from their partners yet refuse to respect that their partners don't think the same way they do and may have different values.

If you (general "you" - not singling you out, sepia) have such a problem with your partner having a wandering eye, then find someone else, but don't blame them for the fact that their behaviors and values differ from yours. There's nobody else on the planet who thinks exactly like you do. Loving a person means accepting them for exactly who they are -- good, bad, or indifferent.
 verygreeneyez
Joined: 3/15/2006
Msg: 86
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 1:17:13 PM
^^^^^^

~OT~ So they look? Who's to say they aren't looking and thinking, "WOW, I'm so lucky to have Jane in my life, I haven't seen a woman that compares to her since I met her." I look at people. Men/women/children/whatever. Doesn't mean I have intentions. And if I do ~ what on earth can the man in my life do about that? That isn't something he can change/alter/stop or avoid. If someone's looking-to-find, noticing them looking isn't going to change a thing. JMO
 ileft
Joined: 4/25/2008
Msg: 87
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 1:20:20 PM
We all look and the people who say they don't are lying!!! I mean you may even be watching tv and see someone who looks good to you, doesn't stop you looking after all we all human lol.

As the saying goes, you can look but you can't touch!!!!
 Cogie36
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 88
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:27:29 PM
Men look at other women for the same reason that women look at other men......

its human nature and there are alot of people of the opposite sex that are very attractive....for instance......do you see actors that are handsome???? or musicians??? ect.....dosent mean you are not happy at home.......just means they are attractive and you like to look at them ...

if you are so insecure that you think the man or woman you are with should only be looking at you........well then......you are living in a fantasy world......

now there is a difference between someone glancing at someone else and downright turning around or gawking.......if they are making a production out of it thats just disrespectful to you and why would you want to be with someone who would disrespect you ????..otherwise.....relax.......
 _Lucky charm_
Joined: 2/18/2009
Msg: 89
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 3:42:31 PM
I don't think everybody on here understands what you mean by looking! i guess you mean staring at other women when they are with you. When looking is OK (since we all have eyes) staring is disrespectful. If a man does not understand that then you should respect yourself and dump him without making big deal out of it.

For those men who calls you insecure I must say, men who stare at other women are actually insecure because they want other women to look back at them and then their girl friend thinks that they are on demand! lol!
 mark4prez08
Joined: 4/11/2007
Msg: 90
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 5:45:54 PM
once i was at six flags, and a hot hispanic woman walked by in a bikini. my g/f at the time asked.." why you lookin at her for?" i replied " if you looked like that i'd look at you too"
 VivaciousVixen2010
Joined: 7/12/2008
Msg: 91
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 7:39:19 PM
sunlightblue you are 100% on the money. we will notice our world. it doesn't mean that we will be sexually aroused, attracted to, or whatever if we have a signifigant other. it just means that some people are ugly and some people are attractive BUT it isn't going to make us STARE, LOOK< GO IN HEAT~~~~ OVER SOMEBODY OTHER THEN OUR PARTNER------there is a world around us with different people~big deal!
 jadegreen
Joined: 2/3/2006
Msg: 92
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:25:15 PM
Maybe a good thread would be ...How do you feel about being the object of being "ogled"?...lol....This good looking guy friend of mine was telling me one time about a lady that stared at him like he was a "piece of meat"... I kinda chuckled at his description of that...lol...I think he didn't like it b/c he didn't find her that attractive in return due to comments he made regarding describing her...lol...(they shall remain private)
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 93
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:32:31 PM
Indeed! If the shoe were on the other foot... that another fellow was staring at YOU, I don't know if you would mind so much then... It's mostly perspective!
 zangie
Joined: 5/30/2007
Msg: 94
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/24/2009 9:50:42 PM

The same reason women will choose to see a movie based on the good looking actor. Men prefer a concrete tangible gawk, women a hypothetical romantic fantasy.


I think this is an interesting, and probably, at least somewhat ,true statement...I always have trouble articulating to men what I'm thinking when I see what I think is a hot guy..whether live or an actor...I'm not thinking about specifically sex with him...I'm thinking about romance with him ( which includes sex)...if that makes any sense. And I think for most men it is purely the sex aspect when just looking?

More OT: I have no problem with men looking at other women ( I have even pointed them out to SO's), it is fun to look at people who we think are attractive...I must be odd, because harmless flirting by my guy doesn't bother me either...my ex husband used to flirt with waitresses all the time...I thought it was cute, and fun. It made him feel so good...that other women found him attractive?

Now, granted, I was fairly confident that they were no threat to me..Oddly enough, considering some of my other personality traits..I'm not that jealous of a person...it would have to be overt and really crossing a line for me to get upset. ( like inappropriate touching...or actual cheating...).
 Refinedsillyguy
Joined: 5/4/2008
Msg: 95
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/25/2009 2:19:26 PM
there is looking and groping. I have been out places, and seen girls look at me. While there bf's right beside them. I'm sure the guy doesnt like it..
 TOMic bomb
Joined: 10/5/2008
Msg: 96
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/26/2009 7:55:30 AM
beware women like the Opening Poster. my exwife would accuse me constantly of looking at different women at the danceclubs, at the mall, in public places of all sorts. she would say horrible things to me about what i was thinking (yes, thinking). the only thing i was thinking was how much i loved and adored her.

i wasn't looking at all because she was what i had always wanted except for this stupid obsession of hers. she ended up cheating on me with a co-worker of hers, asked for a divorce and married him 10 days after our divorce papers were signed. he didn't like the BS about looking at other women either because he beat the crap out of her on several occasions because of it her mother told me.

so.... B B B BEWARE>>>>>>
 Zephyr2553
Joined: 12/28/2008
Msg: 97
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/26/2009 7:58:54 AM
They're just wired that way. Men are attracted to attractiveness. I look at other men also. That doesn't mean I'm not enthralled with the one I'm with.

If I'm in the mountains I can be completely enveloped in their beauty and power, but if a moose walks up in the foreground, my attention will be averted to the moose.

Its just the way we humans are. It means nothing. Don't be so insecure dear.
 Call Me Sugar
Joined: 10/7/2008
Msg: 98
why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/26/2009 10:39:55 AM
I dont think theres anything wrong with looking but i find it disrespectful sometimes if you're with your SO.. im divorced now, for other reasons...
but whoever i date now i could care less who he looks at... its just part of getting older i guess.. it use to bother me when i was younger but it doesnt bother me now...
i look too...

when i was married my ex had a habit of doing this alot tho...

one day we were in the car....
my mom and my 2 yr old daughter were in the back seat... and i was 6 months pregnant with my son....
so we're driving along in stop and go traffic.. my ex sees this pretty girl and practically did an exorcist move (turning his head almost completely around to check her out)
he was getting real close to the car in front of us so i told him to hurry up and get his eyes back on the road, but he was too close and rear ended him.... idiot.....
everyone was ok.. no injuries or damage but it caused a dramatic scene...
i slapped him on the back of the head... i was so p i s s e d..
 privat33r
Joined: 2/8/2009
Msg: 99
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/26/2009 11:02:27 AM
Sugar's right. We can be idiots with the rubber-necking. But some discrete curiousity is natural, and frankly - if guys slow down it doesn't take long before the doc starts thinking about long needles and hormone replacement.
 Riverkilt
Joined: 11/16/2008
Msg: 100
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why do men always have to look at other women!!
Posted: 4/26/2009 11:16:34 AM
Has to be a primal urge.

Years ago spent a weekend at a nudist resort. It was Sunday evening and a very attractive lady was getting dressed to drive home.

When she bent over to tie her shoes all the men around her instinctively turned and looked down her blouse.

She'd been nude with them for two days. No mystery. No secrets.

Still they looked. Gotta be core instinctive lizard brain behavior.
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