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 lisafine
Joined: 9/14/2006
Msg: 72
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!Page 3 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
Ar least he didn't try to give you the old " in some cultures it's considered a compliment" excuse!
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 74
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 4:08:55 AM
it is a compliment. as long as it's not spitefully done. I find it's very good ice breaker and except for one or twice it always get's a laugh. When I was married I would make her jump in her sleep with loud ones. That didnt get her mad though it was the bed shaking from me laughing that didi that. And like I said it's only funny when men do it. When women do it I get appolled.
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 76
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 9:34:11 AM

When women do it I get appolled.


Hey! We get gas too y'know!

When I was a teenager, we only had one TV in the house. It was in my parent's bedroom.....(strange family, don't ask). Anyway, if I was awake late, I would watch TV in their room.

There were many nights, when my sound asleep step-Dad would let out a fart soooo loud, that he would sit bolt upright in bed and shout " WHAT! WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON!"

When he saw me holding my stomach, cause I was laughing so hard it hurt, he realized what had happened....mumbled "sorry" and went back to sleep. Too funny....
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 77
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 12:25:04 PM
women just have to leave the room to fart thats all. Another time when I was married I was driving and grumpy. I smelled this rotten garbage smell and just siad outloud what the ---- smells. I seen my wife was trying not to laugh and thought it was real funny. Then she said she ate brocolli. But when I did it it wasnt funny at all and disgusting. So when women gripe about public farters dont let them fool you.

I fell asleep with a girl I'm seeing few weks ago and when I dozed of I felt one slip out. It wokke me up and I noticed she was under the blanket. I dont know if she was asleep or awke but she did squirm under there a little.
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 79
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 2:12:58 PM
If you meet the right one you can do it in mere weeks. Others longer. One girl it took a long time but she eventually accepted them if they werent by her or in public. I've done it on first dates but only whe people are irritating us. Like if a table is being loud next to us I'll go get a drink or something and when my butt is lined up with their table and food I let one rip. Most times they get quiet fast and snicker amount themselves when I walk away. Sometimes I make sure I have eye contact when it comes out. One time a woman at another table threw down her burger to her plate. On the public farts you cant laugh at your own fart or you'll look imature. You just have to look at people like they are weird for even looking at you.

3 months is way too long. Unless she's a 10 or something.
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 80
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 4:39:45 PM
Aw, man....what a way to ruin a good hamburger.....

Then there was my Mom....she was a heavy smoker, about 2 packs a day.

She had a smokers cough...not one of the really disgusting ones, just a cough.

As she got older, she would fart while she coughed....cough(fart) cough(fart)...and they weren't soft either.

If we were out in public, step-Dad would try his best to find somewhere to hide...(only time I ever heard him fart, was in his sleep)

Mom and I would look away from each other, to keep from laughing.
 Refinedsillyguy
Joined: 5/4/2008
Msg: 81
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/21/2008 7:06:29 PM
ahhh hahah that funny..
well its not like the fart ruined a gooddate. It seemed to have over already.
But I would have excused myself to the washroom.
Or depending where let it out and blamed it on someone else haha..
Guess it depends how the date is going.
 spanishcookie
Joined: 7/23/2008
Msg: 83
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/22/2008 3:19:59 AM
Yeah right, caesar0002! I told you that it wasn't me and you continue to insist that it was. That's what makes me think that YOU did it! Nice to see that you are still posting ridiculous comments on here! Some people never change..... Later
 designingwoman
Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 85
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/22/2008 10:21:58 AM
LBBBBBBBBBBBBRRRRRRRRRAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPp!!!!

Ceasar, Good, I hope I appalled you!! I think your double standard that it's OK for men to fart and that women should not fart is rather silly--we ALL fart

Now stop that farting (said in a fake Irish brogue) Or I'll stop serving you the

Seriously, people should lighten up and not take the idea of farting so darn seriously
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 86
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 12:54:29 AM
hahahahhaa. ohhh. you asked for it. It wasnt me who farted but the time when I blamed that loud one on your dog. Thats another story. You could share that one if you want. i dont mind.

You got pretty defensive and I never mentioned any names. I could of been talking about someone else ya know. Anywyas sorry to get you mad if you feel it was you. lol.

Quazi 100 so you like farters huh?
 Vannili
Joined: 7/8/2008
Msg: 87
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 12:03:56 PM
suzanne, thanks for sharing this is hilarious!!!
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 88
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 3:22:33 PM

Quazi 100 so you like farters huh?


Welllll...it's not in my top 10 list of things I like in a man....

But we all do it....even us womans...
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 93
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 4:45:25 PM
Yes, APFP, I like that....

I'm practicing my New England accent as we speak.....faHt...faHt....
 OneMoreTimeWithFeeling
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 96
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 5:19:46 PM
Watch video.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3CTaKBjd1ww

"We've got chemistry here".
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 98
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 8:07:29 PM
sky that is disgusting and offensive.
 WanderingRain
Joined: 3/9/2008
Msg: 99
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/23/2008 11:16:04 PM
Where... where do you gals find these guys???
Man! One of my girl friends here have the same horror stories. Where on God's green earth do these people come from???
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 101
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/24/2008 2:59:34 AM
Interesting. Some women can joke around and see humor while others act like its the end of the world. I should trick one and act like I dont fart and then give her aggresive dutch ovens every night the day after I marry her. lol. Wait I already did that. Well at least I didnt do a number 2 and trick her into going into the bathroom. Darn I did that too. But I could of held the bathroom door shut until she had to breath. No wait. I did that also. I better just stop now.

What a way for me to get dates admitting this stuff huh? Either A) I cant help it. B) I just dont care. C)I'm funny like that. D)I secretly want to stay single. E) I really am looking for the right woman for me. F) Just nuts.
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 103
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/24/2008 8:05:40 AM

Interesting. Some women can joke around and see humor while others act like its the end of the world. I should trick one and act like I dont fart and then give her aggresive dutch ovens every night the day after I marry her.


Dutch ovens are the worst....and I have been known to vomit right in the bed, depending on the severity of the smell......never happened again
 OneMoreTimeWithFeeling
Joined: 9/8/2008
Msg: 106
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/24/2008 3:06:37 PM
According to a police report on smokinggun today, a guy was charged with battery to a cop after he farted.


Cop Hit In Gas Attack
West Virginia DUI arrestee charged with farting in officer's face

SEPTEMBER 24--Meet Jose Cruz. In the long history of American jurisprudence, the West Virginia man may be the first defendant to ever be charged with passing gas in the face of a law enforcement officer. Cruz, 34, was driving with his car's headlights off Monday night when he was pulled over by West Charleston cops, who noted that Cruz appeared to be intoxicated. After failing a series of field sobriety tests, Cruz was arrested and transported to police headquarters, where he allegedly committed another offense, according to a September 23 criminal complaint (a copy of which you can find here). While being fingerprinted, Cruz allegedly "lifted his leg and passed gas loudly on Ptlm. Parsons. The defendant then fanned the air with his hand in front of his rear onto" the cop. "The gas," the complaint notes, "was very odorous and created contact of an insulting or provoking nature with Ptlm. Parsons." In addition to the DUI count, Cruz was also charged with battery on a police officer for the farting incident. In a TSG interview, Cruz said that while he "farted multiple times," it "wasn't directly in [the cop's] face." Asked if he fanned the fetid air toward the officer, Cruz admitted that he did, but said it was in retaliation for the cop insisting he take a breath test while he was having an asthma attack. "I said, 'Here, put that in your Breathalyzer," he recalled. Cruz, who works as a boilermaker, said that he has been arrested more than a dozen times, including twice previously for drunk driving. After posting $500 bond, Cruz was released this morning from a Charleston jail where he had been held on the misdemeanor charges.


 sungoddness
Joined: 6/30/2008
Msg: 108
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/24/2008 3:28:59 PM
get him some beano
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 109
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/24/2008 11:49:56 PM
You vomited froma dutch oven? lol. Guess you got him back? Who cleaned it up? Did he make sure to hold the corners down so you wouldnt cheat and get some air? I have to admit if someone puked in bed I would cease the dutch ovens.
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 113
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/25/2008 8:04:52 AM

You vomited froma dutch oven? lol. Guess you got him back? Who cleaned it up? Did he make sure to hold the corners down so you wouldnt cheat and get some air? I have to admit if someone puked in bed I would cease the dutch ovens.


The sheets were thrown away immediately....by both of us.

Oh, it was a full on gas attack, for sure.
 caesar0002
Joined: 6/20/2008
Msg: 114
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/25/2008 9:54:13 AM
Quazi 100 you dont sound mad about it at all.
 Quazi 100
Joined: 3/2/2008
Msg: 115
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first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/25/2008 3:22:55 PM

Quazi 100 you dont sound mad about it at all.


It happened a realllllyyyyy lonnnnggg time ago.
 Frank_Dubuque
Joined: 9/18/2008
Msg: 116
first date- he farts in the restaurant!!
Posted: 9/25/2008 7:43:25 PM
OMG makes me want to hook up with someone off of here
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