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 carlitosinbg
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 184
full-time single dadsPage 5 of 66    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41)
it's good to hear about single dads but what about single grand dads as far as i can tell talking with friends i may be about the only one and if the single dads think it is hard to find someone to date think how hard it is for a single grand dad are there any other single grand dads out there or am i about the only one

just a couple of ramblings
though single dads may be a recent topic of conversation there have always been single dads due how long people lived and the number of deaths during child birth. so we are not new to the world but it seems like what i hear we want to think we're new to the parenting life. one of the issues i see happening is how the men pat themselves on the back for doing what is natural if what we are doing is so right then why do we have to say how great we are it is like single dads are seen as great but single moms are just seen when i was a single dad i would also go around and tell people how great i was for having the children now i see it as a problem because that attitude tells the children that men do something exceptional when assuming the parenting and when women accept the parenting role they are just doing what a mom should do doesn;t this send a wrong message to our children

also i read what these men are saying, not only in this forum but in others as well, and it seems like many want to belittle their exs i don't think it's about who is the better parent i don't like the idea of ranking who is better i like to think of it as who provides a healthier environment one can be better without being healither but one can't be healither without being better if you know what i mean

this is the first time i have done this i hope some of you understand what i have said
 kit437
Joined: 1/12/2005
Msg: 185
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 6:43:57 AM
I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN I AM A SINGLE MOM MY SELF AND IT IS HARD WHAT DO YOU THINK OF SINGLE MOMS?
 carlitosinbg
Joined: 7/4/2005
Msg: 186
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 7:23:07 AM
i think they are the most amazing people given all they face in their lives and society it is easier for a man to afford to raise children given the fact that in almost every occupation men make 25 percent more than women for the same job and for women of color this is even more of an issue given that they recieved about 10-15 percent less than white women make in the same job meaning that they make about 35-40 percent less than a man in the same job

also as some of the responses make clear that when a woman doesn't assume the role of mother she is seen as someone who betrayed their gender and this is a stigma men do not face. It puts more preassure on the woman than it does the man and while men can do a feel good approach, women, it seems, not only have to be the parent but the right kind of parent or else they are seen as a bad mother while men are seen as someone doing their best

what do you think
 am70sguy
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 188
view profile
History
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 8:05:34 AM
It's great that you are asking about this and seeking a better way, particularly now instead of later. You don't have to fit the "statistical mold", you can be a far far better parent than those that raised you.

There has really been a lot of work done in regards to parenting techniques over the last 20 years, particularly in regards to Positive Parenting techniques and better information on realistic expectations and where children are at developmentally.

Alas, everybody is out to make a buck and it is a little harder finding good resources on the web, but due to the nature of the subject, it is out there. If you do a search for "Positive Parenting techniques" you can eventually find some good (and not so good) material that can really broaden you're prospective and give you ideas. It takes more effort, time and understanding than the old yell-spank-go to you're room method, but I think the results will prove to be all around better.

Here is one link to get you started: http://www.cwla.org/positiveparenting/default.htm
 YX32
Joined: 7/10/2005
Msg: 189
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 8:17:57 AM
I applaud each and every one of you that posted, for that matter, all single dads! Way to go! Even before I had my own, I used to get a warm feeling when I'd see a man and child...There's something so surreal about watching them interact...Now that I'm divorcing and have my child 99.9% of the time, knowing how much he craves that interaction with his dad, that image of a man and child holds a more significant meaning...May all of you reap your rewards through the smiles of your children...Peace and Blessings to all of you!
 MelwynEbonsbow
Joined: 12/15/2004
Msg: 190
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 8:37:20 AM
I am also the parent of a 6-year-old boy, but I think I have it pretty lucky because he is virtually no effort to raise (minds me well, ex-wife has some problems but I don't think he respects her) and my ex-wife is only a minor nuisance to me since I had the custody arrangement modified and she was actually satisfied with it as much as I was.

The trouble I have is because I have my son all but three weekends of the month, dating is damned near impossible. I can get a sitter easy enough, but just trying to get out and meet women to arrange dates is hard when you can only go places you can take your child.

Anybody got some pointers for places to go? I tried the park but I live in Florida and it's just way too hot to hang out there for long.
 nodrama30
Joined: 6/17/2005
Msg: 195
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 12:44:53 PM
First of all..I applaud all men who step up to the plate and take care of the children. Some of you may have had no choice in the matter and others of you may have had it no other way. In either case, I hold alot of respect for you. I'm a single mom of 3 girls and it's so hard at times. So whenever I come across a man who is a single father I find that as a turn on and an instant conversation starter. Its definitely a huge asset to me when dating. So to all you single fathers out there..keep it up!!! You will be rewarded in so many ways. Good luck
 xJOELx
Joined: 5/23/2004
Msg: 198
view profile
History
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 5:00:21 PM
SIngle dad of my daughter since she was 3 months old, shes going on 2 now.
 adventurerxs10
Joined: 7/8/2005
Msg: 199
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 7:42:43 PM
we found the single dads in Canada...what about California??? Especially SO CAL!!!
 am70sguy
Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 200
view profile
History
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 9:03:59 PM
Ahem.

Rats! Once again out of the age range!! LOL
 cottonginny
Joined: 6/16/2005
Msg: 202
view profile
History
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 9:27:23 PM
it takes a special person to accept another kids. but kids make the world go round ihve no problem dating a full time dad kids are great .dad are great
 bobbi20
Joined: 7/17/2005
Msg: 205
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/19/2005 11:52:59 PM
Well i am not a single dad but i am a single mom. My daughter is 13 months old and her dad is a dead beat. So to all of the single dad out there i have the most respect of you. Kids need there mom and dad but sometimes it just doesn't work like that
 CHARLIE*BROWN
Joined: 7/7/2005
Msg: 206
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/20/2005 12:37:52 AM
I am a single father of a 5 year old lil girl. I am full-time,her mom and I get along, just went seperate ways.She has her alot too, we share her 50/50 I should say.But I love to spend every minute with my daughter! I never had a father figure,so i want to give my daughter the attention and teachings she needs. I gave up drinking because my father was an alcoholic and I did not want my daughter to see me drinking as my father would when i seen him as a youngster.Anyhow, It is GREAT BEING A FATHER!!!
 funone571
Joined: 7/10/2005
Msg: 207
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/20/2005 7:09:40 AM
I’m a full-time divorced dad with two wonderful boys. Yeah it’s tough sometimes but it’s worth it and I wouldn’t trade it for anything in the world.
 RedHedNinja
Joined: 2/16/2004
Msg: 208
view profile
History
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/20/2005 1:17:54 PM
Full time dad to a beautiful 2 and a half year old girl. Definitely a growing experience. Lonely at times, but very rewarding. Been full time parent since a few months after she was born.
 musicmanpvb
Joined: 4/17/2005
Msg: 211
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/20/2005 6:27:52 PM
just last night I was sitting quietly - watching my 9 year old daughter and 11 year old son as they slept in their beds. They just seemed so content, happy, peaceful, and beautiful - they make everything I have ever been through worth it.

When someday the woman comes along that will be a part of what we already have - she will truly be the icing on the cake - because we already have all the cake we'll ever need!
 CraigG
Joined: 5/2/2005
Msg: 213
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/21/2005 1:59:25 PM
I am a full time single dad of 2 boys who are 5&7. their mom doesn't see them much for what reason I don't know. they are great kids and well behaved. It really bothers them that she doesn't hardly ever call or see them and it really pisses me off too.
 Scryer41
Joined: 7/10/2005
Msg: 214
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/21/2005 3:09:20 PM
I'm a single father. My children, however, live with their mother. I see them as much as possible because I understand the need for a father in a child's life. I lost my father at the age of 13. I know how difficult it is to be raised without a father. I don't ever want my children lost in the world without me being there to help them with any problems that may come up. My marriage ended. But my love for my children will aways be strong and healthy. No matter what the situation.
 angeleyes479
Joined: 3/1/2005
Msg: 215
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/21/2005 3:26:58 PM
I must say I admire all the single Dad's. I am a single mom and alot of parents just do not care about the kids. My kids Dad has absolutely nothing to do with them.
But anyway back to the thread, I no alot of single Dad's who have raised thier children extremely well and I commend them for it. Congrats to all the single men who stand up and do the right thing
 wonwascallywabbit
Joined: 7/20/2005
Msg: 216
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/22/2005 11:11:21 AM
I'm a single father of 2 girls now 15 and 17. It has been the best thing that could ever happen to me. I wouldn't want any other life than the one I have. It's been one joy after another.
 flavorite1
Joined: 3/17/2005
Msg: 217
full-time single dads
Posted: 7/22/2005 11:22:21 AM
You are not the only single dad out there. There are thousands of us. You just very seldomly hear us get any credit.
Also if you are truly a single father, than getting a decent woman will be difficult as most are looking for the weekend warrior dads that have more spare time ...and money for them.
 GREATCATCH3
Joined: 1/7/2005
Msg: 219
full-time single dads
Posted: 8/13/2005 8:56:42 AM
HI LIKE TO BE FRIENDS WHERE AR U AT CAN U DANCE? WHAT DO U LIKE TO DO AND YOUR SON TOO
 bcsiny76
Joined: 8/14/2005
Msg: 223
full-time single dads
Posted: 8/14/2005 6:34:18 PM
Full time single dad of a little girl 4.
 Silver Haired Gent
Joined: 8/14/2005
Msg: 225
full-time single dads
Posted: 8/14/2005 9:16:35 PM
I also am a single dad..

I have had full custody of my 11 year old son, since he was 3.

we like to refer to ourselves as " the mens club"

sad to say there are more and more men stepping up..its not sad that the men are doing it, but the fact that more and more women have lost that maturnal instinct, and are willing to give their children away, or they have less character, and GET their kids taken away.


anyway i just found this place, and its late so i havent read this thread all the way, i too am interested in seeing how women feel about single dads, and a relationship that involves another womans child as a package deal...... i'll be sure to read the entire thread soon as i get off work tomorrow
 Celyne
Joined: 7/17/2005
Msg: 226
full-time single dads
Posted: 8/15/2005 12:57:29 PM
I have to commend all of you fulltime single fathers, you all really deserve a big hug and kiss.

My ex and I split half time week here week there, except for the baby (too young for daycare while with my ex)

He had only changed about half a dozen diapers before we split and he really has changed into an amazing father in the last year and I give him a hug and tell him every so often so he knows how much I appreciate it.

I hope you guys have someone to do the same for you :)

Celyne
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