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 MrGordonGecko
Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 30
Why the number of single parents ??Page 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

Why is there seemingly so many young single parents these days ?



Because there are no social penalties for being a young single parent.

If a young woman knew that she would not get one cent of government support at all until she was 25 years old, if she had a kid as a teenager, you can be sure she'd take some real care about who she slept with and under what circumstances she slept with them.

If a young woman knew that if she got pregnant in high school and there were no government programs and she would be kicked out of school for being pregnant, you can be sure she'd take some real care about who she slept with and under what circumstances she slept with them.

If a young woman knew that if she got pregnant very young, that all her family and friends would turn their backs on her, you can be sure she'd take some real care about who she slept with and under what circumstances she slept with them.

But that will never happen. Because the issue of sex and child birth is granted as a woman's domain absolutely in the westernized world, even if everyone around her knows what she is doing is just being a complete and total dumbass. Doesn't matter what it costs the rest of us in taxes. She's protected by the feminist movement, organized religion and the 'for profit' mega corporations who sell diapers.

From a strictly fiscal perspective, teenage single mothers and their children have no real value in society. The odds are stacked that they will be a burden on the social welfare system and they and their children will always have decreased earning power their whole lives. So instead of paying more taxes and being more of a typical American consumer, they are just going to suck on the government tit some more. If there wouldn't be such a huge political and public relations backlash over it, I assure you the government would be sending out white vans, with the logo "No Fetus Will Beat Us" on the side, that would go door to door neutering poor uneducated teenage women.

Teenage single parents exist in such great numbers because no one is holding them accountable.
 lipot
Joined: 11/22/2005
Msg: 47
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/9/2006 6:44:41 AM
Then here is a real question. Who decides what is a bad relationship? I worked to support my wife and son at a job that was stable but not high paying. Then at this time last year she told me that she was going to see other people. I never beat her, nor abused her. Never cheated, rarely went out without her. Yet that was undesirable. My parents have been married for 30 years and by any of our standards, my mom should of walked out. Everyone wants to blame society or television. But we are society. Yes there are lots of truly valid reasons now days for single parents to exist. But if we want to stay the exception and not the rule, we better step up to the plate like our grandparents and great-grandparents did for our parents and show that there is different levels of love and all sex is just one type, not the best type for people that are not committed to one another.
 Boltflight
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 48
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/9/2006 8:21:48 AM
Simple.Relationships just dont` last like they did years ago.Peaple are too selfish,with unreal expectations.They get into relationships that mostly arent` healthy,they have kids while not dealing with the dysfuntion,and when things get hard the selfish take the easyest way out.This leaves single parents.
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 52
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/9/2006 3:46:13 PM
Why is there seemingly so many young single parents these days ?

Its not like sex Ed isnt there... we all know about birth control, but it seems like an increasing number of single parents are out there... and many more YOUNG single parents WHY ??

Of course they know all about birth control. That has nothing to do with. It is all about the money they can earn by receiving child support. Per http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=10391528

Teenage girls who get pregnant deliberately plan to become mothers in the belief that a baby will improve the quality of their lives, a study has found.

The research reveals that girls as young as 13 are making a "career choice" by deciding to have children, since they see parenting as preferable to working in a dead-end job.
 belly18dancer
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 53
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/9/2006 6:01:47 PM
My college professor posed this question to us(circa 97)...we came to the conclusion that a lot of younger girls are very needy of male attention...they seek it out, and in order to keep the guy will often have a baby to sink those hooks into the guy...I'm amazed at the number of teens who view teen pregnancy as acceptable...in my day it was rare but these days it is like no big deal...I was asked by a student, "were u married to your baby's daddy" and one recently asked if my daughter had any kids (she just turned 19)...over the years three of my students have gotten pregnant during the school year(middle school)

it's not all about money either...because 14 and 15 yr old boys are not raking in dough and paying child support...
parents are also very ignorant as to what their kids are doing these days...most are addicted to the site my space...and if you ever look around on that site and see what kids are being exposed to...wow...

I too have run into many younger men in their 20's who are not married but have children with women they dated briefly...one sweet guy even had a one night stand at a party, and now has a daughter...a guy i dated in summer said he just got a girl pregnant....

it's a shame...children should be wanted and planned by parenat/parents truly committed and ready to raise them...not a constant reminder of a relationship gone bad, being young and dumb, or a party mishap
 belly18dancer
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 54
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/9/2006 6:05:13 PM
candid...i agree parents have responsibility to teach kids...but it is not happening...many of the generation coming up now are from broken homes or from homes where there has only been one parent...more than ever before are coming from foster homes too...these kids are not getting the information they need to make good decisions

and for the men out there...even if u are not involved with your daughter's mother anymore, please be involved in your daughter's life...it is a well proven fact that girls are more promiscuous when not surrounded by positive male role models...if they get no love from the most important male in their life, they will seek it elsewhere
 belly18dancer
Joined: 7/22/2006
Msg: 56
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/10/2006 4:17:23 AM
for every great single mom like yourself BADGIRL there are too many who are struggling...and a lot of kids raising themselves...because mom is working trying to make ends meet or she is young and trying to live her life that she feels she is missing out on...

my mom loved my father, she was 16 and thought the only way my grandparents would let them get married was to get pregnant...they made a coscience decision as teenagers to bring me into the world...it was irresponsible...in love or not...too young...they got married and within a year, my father was cheating on my mother...my mother was lucky to have the support of her parents in raising me...but she struggled...she never finished high school and at age 58 works two jobs to make ends meet....I never met my father til i was 20 and have never been able to have a relationship with him...

my nephew's mom has four kids by four different men...my nephew was number 2...I love my nephew and do things with him whenever possible as my brother has absolutely no involvement in his life...I wish i could do more for the other three kids, but I can't.....he's 13 now and very impressionable...his mom got on drugs and the kids were placed with the maternal grandparents as part of the foster system....his own father did not even come forward to try and get custody...I was not even made aware of the situation so I couldn't try either....what kind of effect does that have on a child...my brother sees nothing wrong with his actions obviously, he has a wife and another son (he also had a child when he was 15 that was adopted out and I've never met that neice)

I applaud you for raising your kids to the best of your abilities, and seeing that they become healthy well adjusted adults....but I just see so many kids who are not so lucky...and often the cycle continues and they have kids very young before they are ready
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 63
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/11/2006 6:18:26 PM
There have always been unwed teen mothers and that will not change; however, per http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=10391528, the number one reason is the money girls receive from child support. Get pregnant by a star athlete and when he makes it to the pros you can collect more than $10,000 a month in child support. True most don't hit the jackpot; however, for the same reason people buy lottery tickets, many girls think they are going to win. Before Bill Clinton was president, you had generations raised on welfare. The more children a mom had the more money welfare paid. Now it the child support. Like anything, it is the law of supply and demand. As the price rises, the supply increases. More child support payment equals more children. Not every girl will be influenced by the money but enough will.

But, besides the money, there are other reasons. When almost every movie shows the main characters meeting and having sex even before they have dinner, it sends a strong message that sex is the expected normal behavior. Also, there is no stigma to being a teen mom and teen moms are more likely to have girls that become teen moms. Finally, it may be natural selection at work. In a society where few people go hungry, unwed teen moms will average more children than women that wait to get married. So based on natural selection, in a few generations, most teenage girls may become unwed moms. This upward trend will not change unless, like in the past, the money teen girls can earn by having children is reduced or removed.
 MrGordonGecko
Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 67
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/12/2006 12:09:13 PM
Well here's the other angle in the question.

The number of single parents out there isn't just the influx of people who are becoming new single parents, it's also the number of people who STAY single parents. After all, if single parents were so desirable for dating and marriage, then they would no longer be "single" anymore.

So basically it's like restocking a product in a store that rarely sells. It fills up the shelves and eventually there's a glut in the stockroom and no matter how much you lower the price, consumers just walk past it anyway. That's why single parents are often held in such low regard in society, there's an endless supply of them and frankly, very few people want them for dating and marriage.

If a single parent wants to quit being a shelf warmer, then it would behoove them to make themselves a more attractive package. But God forbid you'd ever tell a single parent, particularly a single mother, that kind of logic. After all, you'd just hear the "You can't tell me what to do!" and "My kids come first!" and "A REAL MAN would accept me and my kids!" Blah blah blah. Whatever.

If single parents out there want to stop being "single", they are just going to have work harder to make themselves as attractive a package as possible. That's real life. Of course most single parents can't handle that truth, so that's why most people ignore them. Good job single parents, you have found a way to make yourselves a social nuisance on the scale of telemarketers and bible thumpers going door to door.
 MrGordonGecko
Joined: 6/29/2006
Msg: 75
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/13/2006 9:13:02 AM
http://www.womedia.org/taf_statistics.htm



* Single parents account for 27 percent of family households with children under 18.

* One in two children will live in a single-parent family at some point in childhood.

* One in three children is born to unmarried parents.

* Between 1978 and 1996, the number of babies born to unmarried women per year quadrupled from 500,000 to more than two million.

* The number of single mothers increased from three million to 10 million between
1970 and 2000.



http://www.rainbows.org/statistics.html




BEHAVIOR STATISTICS

75% of children/adolescents in chemical dependency hospitals are from single-parent families. (Center for Disease Control, Atlanta, GA)

1 out of 5 children have a learning, emotional, or behavioral problem due to the family system changing. (National Center for Health Statistics)

More than one half of all youths incarcerated for criminal acts lived in one-parent families when they were children. (Children's Defense Fund)

Nine million American children face risk factors that may hinder their ability to become healthy and productive adults. One in seven children deal with at least four of the risk factors, which include growing up in a single-parent household...The survey also indicated that children confronting several risk factors are more likely to experience problems with concentration, communication, and health. (1999 Kids Count Survey - Annie E. Casey Foundation)

TEEN PREGNANCY STATISTICS

75% of teenage pregnancies are adolescents from single parent homes (Children in need: Investment Strategies...Committee for Economic Development)

Approximately 13% of all babies born in the U.S. are born to adolescent mothers, with one million teens becoming pregnant each year. Explanations for teen pregnancy include the break-up of the American home and parental loss. (University of Kentucky, Departments of Psychiatry, Ob/Gyn and Psychology)

CUSTODIAL / NON-CUSTODIAL STATISTICS

The number of single-parent homes has skyrocketed, displacing many children in this country. Approximately 30% of U.S. families are now being headed by a single parent, and in 80% of those families, the mother is the sole parent. The United States is the world's leader in fatherless families.

Father absence contributes to crime and delinquency. Violent criminals are overwhelmingly males who grew up without fathers.
(U.S. Census Bureau report, "Child Support and Alimony: 1989, released Oct. 11, 1991)
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 92
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 10/22/2006 7:15:20 AM
Of course the primary reason is the money women can collect from child support. However, from reading these posts it would appear the reason is because so many young mothers are stupid. A common theme they post is "My man was bad." They claim, he was abusive, he was a cheater, he was a no account bum, and/or he left.

Most men are decent and it is easy to tell the difference. I can usually tell the difference in just a couple of minutes. Therefore, if they are to be believed, these women are deliberately picking men the few men that are jerks and passing on the many men that are decent.
 that sam i am
Joined: 10/27/2006
Msg: 122
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/9/2007 1:29:23 AM
because people are softheaded and stupid :) It's the decay of society I tell ya! Soon, getting married to have kids would be a curious remnant of a long forgotten past.
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 124
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/12/2007 1:45:02 PM
One because it is considered acceptable for young single women to get pregnant and have children and two it is for the money.

There have always been young single women having children; however, the numbers have exploded since there is little social disapproval and expecially because they get paid to have children.
 junipermoon
Joined: 3/1/2006
Msg: 131
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/15/2007 5:33:33 AM
in the town where i live, teenage pregnancy has grown to epidemic proportions. if you haven't had 3-4 kids by age 21, everyone wonders what's wrong with you. a newborn is the latest fashion accessory for teenage girls.

now, i realize that this model doesn't apply to most of the women here, but i see it in this town. this phenomenon may or may not indicate similar situations throughout our society.

i theorize that these girls want babies. they actually feel a baby will complete their lives and give them a sense of fulfillment. i find it quite sad that these girls with so much potential have consciously made the decision to reject their own minds and abilities to embrace a life where changing diapers seems like a huge accomplishment. i don't say this to diminish or devalue this experience. but i see it over and over and really feel helpless to see what it does to the community.
 Walts
Joined: 5/7/2005
Msg: 132
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/15/2007 7:51:44 AM

"we could have it all"...


Actually both genders fail to realize that you CAN have it all, just NOT right away. There are steps to take before you can own that mansion, have all the toys to play with, holiday trips all over the world, CHILDREN, etc, etc. You cannot have any of these things without actually having to work and pay for them in some shape or form, and with this, it takes TIME. Of course, a lot today want it NOW and forget that there is always a tomorrow.

Ever hear the sayings about "the cart before the horse" or "Rome was'nt built in a day"???? Probably just us old farts remember them.
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 136
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/23/2007 2:18:10 PM

Smjle...these women that u speak of didnt get themselves pregnant...dont make this all the womans fault...

That is not relevant because it the woman's choice. Guys are considerate and generous so if a girl wants a baby, they are willing to help her out with a donation.
 cuddlyjock
Joined: 4/12/2007
Msg: 140
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/25/2007 5:49:35 PM
i think you're well shot of him and it's his loss .i can't imagine if i had a child and missing his/hers first tooth,word or steps!he must be a shallow,self obsessed numpty!!good on you girl.
 GuitarGuy_
Joined: 3/15/2007
Msg: 143
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/29/2007 1:15:22 PM
Nobody gets married thinking it will end. It's how it works, you get married start a family and then live happily ever after. Except it doesn't always work that way so there are children involved.


Again, no one expects or hopes to be divorced.
 js2721
Joined: 6/23/2006
Msg: 144
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 4/29/2007 1:31:02 PM
emotions can get the best of us at times...good luck to you...
 Smjle
Joined: 9/19/2006
Msg: 146
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/12/2007 12:09:00 PM
Just follow the money. Women have children for the money. Take away the money like God and nature intended and there will be few single parents.

Without the money, which they have done nothing to earn, even the women that happen to get pregnant will have an abortion or give their children up for adoption and that is the way it should be.
 js2721
Joined: 6/23/2006
Msg: 177
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/26/2009 5:18:10 PM
Being single and unhappy is better than being married and unhappy....
 hungry_joe
Joined: 6/24/2006
Msg: 178
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History
Why the number of single parents ??
Posted: 7/26/2009 5:39:04 PM
Why are there so many single parents?

You might ask why are there so many stars in the sky.

Single parents are kinda like stars:

Some are born from the passionate heat, like that of nebula

Others are are echos of collapsed relationships like pulsars.

Some are from dead relationships that of a quasar.

So asking why there are so many single parents is asking why there are so many stars on a clear night.

And yes, single parents are stars burning bright, with a loving light.
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