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Joined: 10/21/2009
Msg: 199
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bad pickuplinesPage 4 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
If it is true that you are what you eat, I could be you by morning!
Joined: 11/2/2012
Msg: 200
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/7/2012 3:08:12 PM

"Hi my name is Tom" and then I smile.

I'd like to try that. Too bad my name isn't Tom. I'll think of something else.
Joined: 9/29/2008
Msg: 201
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/7/2012 3:30:29 PM
hey girl can i come home with you??

an NO it did not work i actually laughed when the guy said it apparently he was kinda serious about it...
Joined: 10/15/2012
Msg: 202
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/7/2012 3:41:09 PM
I witnessed this work.

Do you like pizza?

You wanna get some pizza and ****?
Joined: 11/4/2012
Msg: 203
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/15/2012 5:54:38 PM
You won't have to wait for my call tomorrow if you sleep over.

You know how some men buy really expensive cars to make up for certain shortages? Well, I don't even own a car.
Joined: 10/5/2011
Msg: 204
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/15/2012 10:51:44 PM
Here is one i used on a woman i just met that was not received very well. I was introduced to her and shook her hand and it was quite the firm hand shake on her part and i proceeded to say..."That's a nice firm hand shake, that feels like a handjob hand shake." She was initially appalled, but later on i bumped into her and she apologized to ME for the bad reception of the line/joke worked out in the end!
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 205
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/17/2012 4:38:46 AM
What has 2 thumbs and loves blowjobs? (then you say "This guy" while pointing only your thumbs at yourself)
 jt guy
Joined: 12/24/2008
Msg: 206
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:06:15 PM
I don't need pick up lines for women. I just sit at the end of the bar and lick my eyebrows.
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 207
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:38:22 PM
a friend and i were sitting in a sports bar and my friend was interested in one of the guys there so she asked me whar she can say to get his attention...

so i told her to tell him HOW DARE YOU... he just looked at her and said i dare i what?

so i told her to tell him HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME MASTERBATE TO YOU...

it worked he took her home
Joined: 6/8/2011
Msg: 208
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:41:33 PM
one that did't not work on me was

a guy come up to me and says want to come to my place for PIZZA and a BLOW JOB

i said NO! he says what you don't like PIZZA

was funny but did not work
Joined: 11/4/2012
Msg: 209
bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/18/2012 8:44:04 PM

so i told her to tell him HOW DARE YOU MAKE ME MASTERBATE TO YOU..

I would spill my drink with that one...What?!

...then take her home ( if she is cute)
Joined: 6/11/2007
Msg: 210
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bad pickuplines
Posted: 11/19/2012 2:05:08 PM
Baby, you make me think of my pinky toe, cuz one day i know i'm gonna be banging both of you on my coffee table. :v
Joined: 2/29/2012
Msg: 211
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/6/2013 9:57:35 PM
My personal favorite.....

Do you prefer hemp or cotton ropes when being tied up?

Yes, that has actually worked...once.
Joined: 9/23/2012
Msg: 212
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/7/2013 7:57:56 AM
Q-Ever had your belly button French kissed?

A- yes

Q- From the inside?
Joined: 2/2/2011
Msg: 213
view profile
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/7/2013 8:03:30 AM
...You from Ireland? 'Cuz when I look at you my penis is Dublin...
Joined: 4/23/2011
Msg: 214
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/7/2013 12:48:05 PM
wanna see my circumcision scar?
Joined: 2/24/2010
Msg: 215
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/7/2013 2:23:54 PM
I have some nut case on here that twice has sent me a chat saying...

Have you every wanted the power to shrink a man to a two inch little man?

WTF??? and he doesn't remember chatting w/ me before. I told him, I would never forget a stupid line like that.

I blocked him.
Joined: 1/4/2013
Msg: 216
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 12:58:32 PM
Ok, this is from Robin Williams, but it works from time to time: "Hey baby, are your parents retarded, cause you sure are special".

It gets a good laugh here and there..
Joined: 9/25/2012
Msg: 217
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 2:33:10 PM
'What's your sign? Slippery when wet??"

Yeah, I never got very good results at the disco with that one.....
Joined: 7/25/2007
Msg: 218
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 2:42:30 PM
You tell her just think of me as him and I will think of her as you.
Joined: 7/25/2007
Msg: 219
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 2:44:36 PM
sitting at the bar and this lady ask me there are no more seats. I told her long as I have a face you will always have a place to sit. she told me to get up then I said sure
Joined: 6/16/2007
Msg: 220
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 3:26:30 PM
"hey, you have a chance with me. Did you want to blow your chance?"

I had a cute, voluptious coworker who's boyfriend worked with us, and her mom (who thinks I'm hot) as well. Stopped in on my day off to fix something, wearing biker shorts, so she asked, "so, do you ever stuff those?"

of course I replied, "don't need t0, just think of you." as I kept on walking. Got a shriek from her for that, her boyfriend thought it was hilarious. He also thought it was funny when she had asked if a dress looked good on her, and I pointed out the only place it would look better would be on my bedroom floor. He was confident enough to realize she wasn't going home with me, and it was all just meant in jest anyway.

I love not working for a corporation. Anything goes :)
Joined: 7/15/2011
Msg: 221
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/8/2013 5:25:16 PM
Can I take your picture? She says why? Because I want to tell Santa what I want for Christmas next year :)
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 222
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/9/2013 8:50:39 AM
May I buy you a drink or do I have to f#ck you first.
Joined: 7/21/2008
Msg: 223
bad pickuplines
Posted: 1/16/2013 11:49:44 AM
you must be a general in the army, cause you got my privates at attention!
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