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 elenna71
Joined: 8/4/2006
Msg: 1115
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?Page 30 of 86    (16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56)
Before I ever did "online dating" I responded to newspaper ads or I would select dates through the phone ads. Ninety-nine percent of the time it was not a good experience at all. There's a good chance that in my not so long lifetime I've probably met about 30 people or more through newspaper ads or phone ads which means no picture was available before the first date. I even met up with the same person twice in the course of 2 years without meaning to and both times I was not attracted to him. He didn't recognize me from the first time but he made it obvious that he was attracted to me the second time around. Basically, there has been no physical attraction with 99% of the guys, men, or gentlemen that I have met "blindly" so to speak. This lack of attraction has been in spite of a great phone conversation and some kind of connection over the phone. One guy turned out to be 47 instead of 37 and about 80 pounds heavier than he said. I was 20 years old at the time. There was one guy though (that 1%) that I did find hot and whom I dated for a while but because of drastic misunderstandings we did not stay together. I think when one is meant to cross roads with another person, romantically in this case, a way will be found and no obstacle will be too great, not even the lack of a photo on the PoF profile.
 The_Champ_Is_Here
Joined: 10/12/2006
Msg: 1117
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/3/2006 8:12:52 AM
What a crock of bs, the picture thing is obvious to see if you think they are good looking. No matter what if the guy or girl reeks of confidence, wit the fact online dating is so much about what we look like, that is the basis of if a woman or man will get back to you or not when a message is sent.
Sorry but even if I didn't have confidence or I was exuding confidence, the fact is I am not what most women call attractive, suc is life. Looks plays the biggest part in dating today. Most will believe that the person is so nice and so great because of how attracted they are to them by how they look. Is why so many people also enjoy putting on fake acts and playing them.
I endured razzing from co-workers at my last job when a couple of people happened to be checking out the site I was on. It does get annoying sometimes to hear it. Ya they may have acted immature but not every workplace is going to have amazing mature people working there. So that is why alot of people choose not to publicly display their pic. Yes they should send you one when you are talking more often online.
 Flear
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 1118
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/3/2006 1:29:25 PM
mizzwildthing ...

i think "the champ is here" got pretty close to what i was saying.

well close anyway

if you want looks, then go find some guy who is about looks.

i want something deeper and more meaningful, and if the women out there are shallow, superficial and materialistic to only judge if someone is worth approaching based on looks and appearances from a distance, without spending any time getting to know who the other person is inside, if your only going to judge by looks and take no time to find out who the other person is inside. ...

then i guess i am missing the point, i guess i don't get it. and if you want to look down on me because i feel there is a very important reason for judging people based on their morals and personality, then by all means, continue looking down on me.

so if you can't understand why i don't show my pic upfront, it's because i don't want to be judged on my looks as the sole means of who i am.

if your that shallow to pass up those without a pic. and if your that shallow to judge people only by their pic, ... well i don't want anything to do with you.

as mentioned pics can lie, and so can people about their profiles, take a few moments to say 'hi', to find out if they are genuine, ...

but to do that you have to be interested in who they realy are as a person, not just if you want someone who will only be around in your life so long as they make you feel good.

relationships are about 2 people living together, not just making you feel good. if you aren't able to find out what makes the other person tick, then your stuck finding someone based on their looks, and what they tell you vs. how naive you are. (there pic & profile)

i don't support that mentality
 dguy4u247
Joined: 11/25/2006
Msg: 1121
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/4/2006 4:08:21 AM
I have and it was awkward...I have also been on ones where the person had her friends photo posted and they both showed up on the date...weird

Bottom line is you take your chances on any date/meeting
 Neysha61
Joined: 7/31/2006
Msg: 1122
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/4/2006 11:29:34 AM
Why yes I have. Everyday. Called life!
Every person you meet is a potential something or ruther ... friend, lover etc.
As for this site ? I have met quite a few people in person from on here.
But they have always been group gatherings of fish so the stress level was not there.
Some people looked like their pics, some didn't. So what?
Have fun people!
 wonderwoman84
Joined: 11/5/2006
Msg: 1123
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/4/2006 2:06:51 PM
I did Twice. Never again. They were great chatting online, but in person ouch. No pic was only the begining and I am not only talking about looks here.
 iRocket
Joined: 8/8/2006
Msg: 1125
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/5/2006 1:41:37 PM
I'm really glad MIZZ doesn't have a pic of herself though I gather she did at some point. But I am glad I didn't see it, because I might have been blinded to what she is really about. I read the profile, and I couldn't stop laughing. Obviously someone who didn't take their education seriously which her spelling and grammar are testimonial to, the blatant contradictions of the statements in her profile, someone who definitely needs a picture or has to "see" the person first before she gets involved with them backed up by two statements in her profile about chemistry(which we all know is a poor mans excuse for sexual attraction based on physical appearances) and "I want a man who is BIG & STRONG, TALL, DARK & HANDSOME" at the very top of her list. Then she sys she is not judgmental, which we all have seen to be not true both in her profile and in her posts. (btw..the word is "maGic" not maJic)

"Never was one for dating , BUT I do want to be in a relationship again. Not sure what kind I want at this piont." (and yes I do know the difference between a typo like the word point and illiteracy like the word magic) This is a fine example of someone who doesn't want to put forth the effort to get what one wants. She would rather skip the work and just get the big, strong, tall, dark and handsome guy hopefully just handed to her evident by the statement "I WANT A MAN who can chop wood like a SON OF A B*T*CH. Fix my truck when it breaks, is the best shopper in the world, and cook like a gourmet chef." so that again..she doesn't have to do any work.

"Someone I can be best friends with FIRST" ----this isn't born from relationships based on looks. What you mean is... if he is good looking first, then I want us to be best friends second.

"SOMEONE WHO MAKES ME A BETTER PERSON." ---No one can make you who you are, or make you a better person, or make you a criminal or make you an angel. Who you are is totally and strictly up to you and no one else. It's no ones job to make you anything. It's no ones responsibility to make you happy with yourself or make you happy about life, or make you a happy person at all. You are either happy with yourself and who you are already, or you are looking for someone to do the job for you. Personally, I wouldn't want to date anyone that isn't happy with themselves and about life already and I sure wouldn't expect them to want to date me if I wasn't already completely happy with myself and enjoying life.

I believe that someone I find special enough to want to marry, would be a union of each others happiness and character and personality which is discovered through dating, becoming friends and building a bond, trust and then being in love with each other, which has nothing to do with looks.

"I do not judge on past history ,just on present. " ----as opposed to present history? or that you only judge on the present? Never mind it's still judging, something you say you don't do.

I laughed so hard, that I have to thank you, however, because I had a rotten day at work and though I tried hard to hide it and be cheerful until I got home, some co-wrkers still suspected my frustration and wished me a happier eveing. Their wish came true (thanks to your profile) and I am thankful for them and their wishes.

Now, I wouldn't normally have gone to such great lengths with this post Mizz, but you keep telling others in their posts (including myself) that they don't "get it" or "understand" what you are saying. But in truth, their comments DO validate that they understand your posts, and not that they aren't getting them. The simple fact is, you "need" and "require" a picture to validate talking to or approaching someone or being their friend, and they don't. I give kudos to Every single person on this thread that has stated they have dated someone or met someone from POF or any other online site without a picture because they were willing to take responsibility for their actions, whether it ended in success or failure. For "some" people , Mizz, they require a picture to feel some sort of guarantee or maybe just a better chance at success before they make the effort to get to know someone, and that's just sad.

I for one have dated many women who didn't have a picture and I never asked for one, ever, because I don't care what they look like. Their words, their thoughts, their compassion, their passions, will tell me everything I need to know about them (much like your profile's words) and there are just some things about a person, that looks (no matter how good looking) just can't make up for in them.

For people concerned about meeting someone they have never seen (blind date) there are many solutions. My best suggestion is for both of you to bring a friend, make it a group setting, and sociable, and have your friend and his friend exchange descriptions of each other or even pictures if they don't mind. This introduces a much higher level of security as well because it's a great deterrent for people of ill-repute who might have less than honorable intentions, meaning your friend is now involved in the meeting and so is his.

Something I have done that works well is plan to meet at some public place (we decided a very popular dance club) and a time (we decided 8pm), and I asked her to show up at 5 after 8 and come to the bar and a drink will be waiting for her. I got there at 8 ordered two drinks, sat her drink on the bar at the seat directly next to mine and place a simple 3x5 card against the drink that said "This drink is for <her first name> Daytona". I made up the last name and told her the full name that would be on the card so that not just anyone with the same first name would mistake it for their's and approach. It wasn't the drink she liked but it doesn't have to be either, it's just a cute little icebreaker that works and serves a purpose of locating each other. BE creative and have fun with the first meeting. It will make a difference.

Will I date someone without a picture? Hell yes. if they don't have a picture, does it automatically mean they are hiding something or just flat out dishonest? Hell no. That kind of thinking is what dishonest people have. And I hate to repeat myself because you didn't get it the first time, there are many reasons for people not to have a picture, it doesn't mean they are being dishonest, and they don't owe you an excuse or a reason. You are going to assign whatever you feel is the truth to them (being dishonest) no matter what their reason is. If those people feel you haven't earned a reason, then good for them, because you haven't. Do they owe you a reason? Hell no. Does not responding to you or defending your taunts for them not having a picture make you right? Hell no. The only reason you are saying they are being dishonest by not having a picture, is to make "yourself" feel good about yourself, and maybe cast aspersions on their good character before you even know the person. This is what we call making the mediocre you into something you aren't by putting others down to give the impression you are above them.

You have a testimonial that says you are a wise woman.....sorry..I just don't see it.

Temet Nosce
 divvy
Joined: 7/5/2006
Msg: 1126
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/5/2006 5:51:51 PM
hi how are you all life is freakin great i dont have a pic and the one ladey did not eather but we started to talk on hear then on msn and my cell and we know go for coffey and what ever lots same with a few more so yea a pic dont matter to me happey times to all rock on pleanty of fish
 kennedy291969
Joined: 9/26/2006
Msg: 1127
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/9/2006 7:25:47 PM
haha yea i did one time...for some reason we connected very well..and when i got there(coffeeshop)..he was there hiding in the crowd and i had no clue it was him...i thought he didnt show..but in fact the entire time he was watching me...and to tell you the truth..when he came up to me i was infact INCREDIBLY pleased..he was yummy..but..that was probably very lucky..i dated him for a few months...then he joined the army and we still talk..but..ive had men post fake pics..you take your chances no matter if they have a pic or not :)...
 Little Lady
Joined: 4/2/2005
Msg: 1129
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/9/2006 10:49:32 PM

I'm really glad MIZZ doesn't have a pic of herself though I gather she did at some point.


She does have one available for all to see. Just try voting on it. (nice picture I have to say)

I've met many people off this site that did not have a picture up. All meetings worked out nice. But then I'm not looking for a partner, just friends.
 Dolittledandy
Joined: 2/14/2006
Msg: 1130
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 6:01:17 AM
To Begin With about a year ago I was emailing a lady that lived about 100 miles away from me,we where talking and I'M each other over a period of time.she had no pic posted but I did we seem to be getting better and better at knowing each other.I'm Retired and she worked as a manager of a wendy's in the city where she lived.We would go on and on about how we both lied oldes music and the during one nite we agreed to have a date due to her being off that weekend.We meant at the Comosphere.which is about half the distance between where both of us lived.I had purchased some flower's and had already purchased the tickets for the show's.We shook hand's and went inside,After the first show we had some time to waste,befor the next show so I showed her around the Campus.I had went to College there.After the tour we went and got something to eat,then headed back for the next show.we spent the whole day together,During the day I wanted to reach out and hold her hand but held back cause I didn't want to crowed her,we said good bye and headed back to our own city's about three week's later we agreed to meet and go Rollor Skating,InWichita,Again we both drove our selves to the place to meet,after haveing Skated for three hour's we went out to eat at a pancake house it was then that I some how Started to feel like she was using me so she could engage in flirting with not only other males but also with other wemon,Then I kinna knew she was BI.Later that month I drove to the city where she worked and gave her ths copy's of the Pictures of us Skating.Then I Informed her I knew what she was doing when we where out together,And she admited it.End of story I never seen her again.I believe that a picture help's some times but not alway's.Thank You For listening to my story.I been wanting to tell it for long time now.Even if one has to post a younger pic of themselves it's generally OK.We all want to look good to other's but don't forget to tell the other that pic is of you hen you were younger!!!!See Ya Dolittledandy
 JazzLover55
Joined: 12/1/2006
Msg: 1131
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 6:12:55 AM
Well...

I have only just started this online dating thing. But... here is my take on this:

No picture...at least you are sending messages back and forth with someone who is misleading you.

I just went out with a fellow... he posted a picture of himself atleast 10-15 years old. and easily 70 lbs lighter.

I would rather have honesty.

When I chat with someone from now on...I will always as how old the pic is etc.
 JazzLover55
Joined: 12/1/2006
Msg: 1132
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 6:13:33 AM
Well...

I have only just started this online dating thing. But... here is my take on this:

No picture...at least you are not sending messages back and forth with someone who is misleading you.

I just went out with a fellow... he posted a picture of himself atleast 10-15 years old. and easily 70 lbs lighter.

I would rather have honesty.

When I chat with someone from now on...I will always as how old the pic is etc.
 JazzLover55
Joined: 12/1/2006
Msg: 1133
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 6:14:45 AM
sorry about the duplicate post. I was just trying to edit the post I made first...

I meant... without a pictures atleast the fellow is NOT misleading you
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 1134
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 6:28:18 AM

No picture...at least you are sending messages back and forth with someone who is misleading you.

I just went out with a fellow... he posted a picture of himself atleast 10-15 years old. and easily 70 lbs lighter.

I would rather have honesty.

I agree no pic is just as bad as a false pic. That's why it's not only good to ask how current the pic is, but ask for a couple or use a cam. People can provide one false pic, but most aren't prepared to give you 3 false pics....hell ask height and weight and age as well; sounds strange but these are strange times.

Anything other than what you see in person whether it's a false pic or an old pic is dishonesty. No good comes of people who do that. No one's going to date you if you misrepresented yourself...no matter how great your personality is.
 LadySunDevil
Joined: 10/1/2005
Msg: 1135
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 12:21:26 PM
Nope, but I met a guy who used another person's pic....does that count?
 Flear
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 1136
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 1:09:38 PM
old school queen ...

if your going to ask that much about the other person you might as well be upfront and tell them you have no desire to be willing to believe anything they have to say.

and who wants to date someone who doesn't believe them ???

and with or without a pic, ... you don't need a pic to misrepresent yourself, you don't need to hide a pic to misrepresent yourself.

for those who are showing false pics (not current, or not their own), that's their insecurity, and i'll agree, it's not good to go out with such people (although the majority of you are unable to tell the difference).

i would like to hear why no pic is as bad as a false pic though ?

from the person who is faking their pic they are knowingly deceiving you, the one without a pic, how is that deceptive ? i'm asking people to judge me on my morals, personality, feelings, and the rest of it, i'm asking people to consider those things about me instead of judging me by my looks.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 1137
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 1:17:36 PM

if your going to ask that much about the other person you might as well be upfront and tell them you have no desire to be willing to believe anything they have to say.

Pretty much. This is a total stranger. When you have met a few people who do misrepresent themselves, it's best to just ask up front. If it's not clear in the profile or conversation - it's better to ask than assume and then come here and post a thread about how you met someone that was lying about their appearance.

i would like to hear why no pic is as bad as a false pic though ?

from the person who is faking their pic they are knowingly deceiving you, the one without a pic, how is that deceptive ? i'm asking people to judge me on my morals, personality, feelings, and the rest of it, i'm asking people to consider those things about me instead of judging me by my looks.

I never said it was deceptive to have no pic, but basically you know just as much about a person with no pic as you do with a person who presents a false one...absolutely nothing. Barring what they are telling you which should be honest but until you meet them, it's a toss up - the rest is the unknown. That's how they are similar.

And hell, I'm not stating that as a new fact, I am merely agreeing with the other 99+ people (mostly without pics) that have already said that in defense of having no pic posted...as in

"What's the difference? Someone with a false pic is no better than someone with no pic."

I would quote that to a specific person, but it's everywhere in this thread. Shouldn't be hard to find.
 Alana2
Joined: 8/7/2005
Msg: 1139
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 5:51:35 PM
Yes, I met someone with no pic. He turned out to be one of the best looking guys I've met and a charming date. We had been emailing for months before we met and I liked everything he had to say also. That was six years ago and I still see him occasionally.
 smoochmaster
Joined: 10/22/2006
Msg: 1142
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 7:07:01 PM
Wisdom reveals the following truth...

Those people who are obsessed with seeing a picture with a profile do so because of an innate "fear of the unknown, a sublime state of paranoia, which inhibits their intelligence".

To disregard profiles without pictures means you are eliminating many opportunities for meeting "Mr. Right". A woman may claim she'll only meet with a guy if she sees his picture first because she thinks it'll make her "safe "...this mind set if foolish, as seeing a picture doesn't protect you from anything. Any "delusion of security" you indulge in only increases your vulnerability.

The wise course to take is to forget about the picture and focus on the profile and meeting the person on the profile. Leave the paranoia and superficiality at home.
 1800DoUCare
Joined: 5/19/2006
Msg: 1143
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 7:18:21 PM
I met a man from another site who didn't have a picture.
When I asked for one he said no one ever asked me to put a sack over my head.
He was from my home town and knew many of my relatives. Sounded like a very nice guy by his letters and our phone conversations. he called me every day some times once or twice.
I told my self when I met him I would except him no matter what he looked like as he sounded so sincere, sweet and caring.
Would I do it again no. he was nothing like he sounded, and I'm not into guys that date both men and women, he never told me this but it was very obvious when I met him, and then I found out my in-stincts were right.
I seen him twice and told him I was not at all attracted to him.
Talked to him on the phone later only as a friend, but the sweet sincere guy turned into a jealous, controlling guy, who was just into him self.
I think by then he knew I had him figured out. I think the dating female thing was just an act
so his children wouldn't figure him out, I do answer letters with out pictures, but not for long before I have them send one. I will not date again unless I see a picture first as a picture says a thousand words. even to chat with them it is more real if you can see who you are chating with.
 flower_faery
Joined: 11/19/2006
Msg: 1144
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/11/2006 7:41:32 PM
I have met a man with no pic.... he wasn't my "type" at all, but his personality was everything to me and I started to find him attractive... very much so, actually. Unfortunately we were at two very different points in life and it ended before it started.
 Flear
Joined: 5/7/2006
Msg: 1145
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/12/2006 1:23:50 AM
hermosaflor ...


We all know physical appearance is important so if you are going to keep it a secret until the last minute then be prepared for the worst!


ahh yes, physical appearance, the ultimate in superficial judging someone on looks and not on any merit of who they are as a person, the ultimate indicater of who is shallow and who is willing to see the person inside.

old school queen ...


I never said it was deceptive to have no pic, but basically you know just as much about a person with no pic as you do with a person who presents a false one...absolutely nothing. Barring what they are telling you which should be honest but until you meet them, it's a toss up - the rest is the unknown. That's how they are similar.


i do believe that is why lately i have been more willing to read who the person is i'm talking with, not their profile, but using a bit of psychic ability and reading who they are (and what they are here for), many are interested in just themselves, and many, while they say "looking for long term", are only putting that on there intests in an attempt to find someone who is more willing to stick around regardless of their own interests, which often amounts to, compairing several people and trying to judge who is the best one, ... don't care if you believe it or not, this directly shows they aren't as willing to make themselves commited to one person, but are looking for who they think is the best person.

and if you happen to find out your the 'best person', your only the best person for now, till things don't work out, then they're out looking for someone else, ... in my mind that's not "long term", that's very immediate and 'short term'

but these are things people don't write about themselves, ... but she sure do let it shine through when you have a look at who they are inside, it becomes easy to find out who is serious, who is honest about their intentiones, who is selfish, who is still carying over past hurts instead of waiting to heal and let go before considering someone new in their life.

then there is the mundane people, ... i've got nothing against the mundane specificaly, just against the shallow ones.
 ~LoriMac~
Joined: 3/12/2006
Msg: 1146
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/12/2006 1:26:01 AM
No i havent met anyone without a pcture...and i would never in a million yrs let anyone meet me without seeing my pic first.
 mystlw
Joined: 9/19/2005
Msg: 1147
view profile
History
Has anyone been brave enough to meet someone with no pic at all?
Posted: 12/12/2006 8:51:02 AM

ahh yes, physical appearance, the ultimate in superficial judging someone on looks and not on any merit of who they are as a person, the ultimate indicater of who is shallow and who is willing to see the person inside.


One of the things that strikes me about these picture/no picture threads is the level of intolerance. Everyone has preferences, and that is their choice.

Some people feel safer knowing what the person they are talking to looks like. It doesn't make them shallow, nor does it negate their ability to see a person "inside".
Conversely, some people feel safer not posting a photo for the whole world to see. It doesn't automatically mean they're suspect, or that their hiding something.

It's all about preference and comfort level; who are any of us to judge that?
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